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Kapitel 25

As she freed herself from his strong arms, Yan Hao looked up and opened his eyes. He was still sobbing, his entire face trembling with immense grief. His eyes were blurry with tears—Xia Tian was at a loss! She had never seen a man so heartbroken!

“I…I just want to see you, just to see you, Ji Hong…” Yan Hao’s lips were still trembling.

She couldn't help but gaze into Yan Hao's eyes. Through the glistening tears—she clearly saw another "him" standing with his hands at his sides in his pupils! That "him" was the one she knew. That "him" was the one who was truly sobbing.

She suddenly pushed Yan Hao away and stood up! Then she heard the door behind her slam shut with a loud bang.

Someone's peeping?!

"Who?!" Xia Tian asked, turning her head.

She heard hurried footsteps fading into the distance in the corridor. When she unbolted the door and went outside, the corridor was empty.

Summer stood in the corridor for a while. She didn't know what was going on! She thought it might be a hallucination caused by lack of rest. She was a dignified physiology teacher who never believed in gods or ghosts. But at this moment, she was truly upset or rather, confused.

Back in the ward, Yan Hao was already lying down, asleep on his side. Xia Tian stood blankly by the bed for a long time. She rubbed her temples, recalling the unbelievable scenes she had just experienced!

Perhaps Yan Hao was just having a dream? Or perhaps it was her hallucination? In any case, she believed that "he" had already left and would never come back.

No! Absolutely not—Xia Tian silently repeated to herself.

When Yan Hao woke up, it was already ten o'clock in the morning. He still looked very weak—completely lacking the strength he had shown when he held and hugged her earlier.

She tilted the hospital bed up so he could lie half-reclined. Then she handed him milk, chocolate, hard-boiled eggs, and the fresh croissants she had specially bought from the bakery, one by one.

"Eat more. You need to take good care of yourself," Xia Tian said gently. Her face remained calm, and she didn't mention a word about what had just happened!

Yan Hao obediently took the food one by one, then wolfed it down. His cheeks puffed out, and he glanced shyly at Xia Tian.

Xia Tian couldn't help but smile. Since staying on to work at the university, she had never been this close to students! She was used to observing them with a rational eye and speaking to them in a condescending, educational tone—she had always been accustomed to this distance in interpersonal interactions! Always!

But sometimes students are adorable—Yan Hao's childishness is just like "him"! But he's also just as impulsive, brave, and helpful as "him"!

Xia Tian never even considered how to connect Yan Hao with "him". They are two different people! One is right in front of her, the other is far away in the underworld! It must all be an illusion—Xia Tian thought as she handed Yan Hao some food.

"Take a good rest for two days! Don't rush! It's important to recover! I thank you on Lei Ming's behalf!" Xia Tian said with a slight smile.

"Thunder?" Yan Hao stopped eating half a croissant.

"Oh, so you could call him my...boyfriend too! Don't tell anyone else. He's in the ward upstairs from you." Xia Tian blushed and said somewhat shyly.

Yan Hao smiled shyly. She saw that Xia Tian was no longer the stern physiology teacher, but simply a young girl full of happy dreams. "Then I'll have to eat Teacher Xia's wedding candy!" Yan Hao said, blinking. His complexion was much better than when he had his blood transfusion yesterday.

After breakfast, Yan Hao insisted that she go upstairs to see "Brother Leiming," saying that he was seriously injured, but that he had only received a blood transfusion and would be fine after some rest.

After Xia Tian told him she would come back later to bring him lunch, Yan Hao nodded and watched her leave the ward.

He felt a surge of smug satisfaction, finally knowing Teacher Xia's boyfriend's name. This little secret was enough to brag about to Shen Zihan and the others!

Just as his eyelids were drooping and he was about to drift off to sleep again, the door was suddenly flung open.

Standing at the door was Huang Xiaohui. She gritted her teeth, her eyes wide open, and glared angrily at Yan Hao.

"You, how did you get here?" Yan Hao was startled by her expression—they hadn't seen each other for a month because of studying for exams.

"Hmph! You just want me to stay away, don't you?"

"What...what do you mean?"

"What do you mean by this? You're not dead, so why are you crying so sadly in front of someone else?" Xiao Hui'er spoke rapidly in Sichuan dialect, like a machine gun.

What are you talking about?

"Stop pretending, you surnamed Yan! I've seen through you! Shameless! Bastard!" Xiao Hui'er shouted as she rushed to Yan Hao's bedside.

"What's wrong with you?"

"Get out of here!" Xiao Hui'er grabbed a glass from the bedside table and smashed it on the floor. "Get lost! I never want to see you again. You said you'd take care of you, huh! You bastard! May you die a horrible death!" As Xiao Hui'er cursed, tears streamed down her face. She looked like she wanted to tear Yan Hao to pieces. The more bewildered Yan Hao's expression was, the more it fueled her resentment and anger.

Finally, she couldn't bear to see Yan Hao's aimless and confused state any longer, so she turned and ran out of the ward. Her retreating footsteps and sobs echoed down the empty corridor.

Yan Hao sat on the hospital bed, his mouth slightly agape. The storm he had just witnessed made him truly feel that if life wasn't a drama, then it was a terrifying and bizarre dream!

He just sat there on the bed, seemingly lost in thought, yet also seemingly not thinking at all—until he returned to the ward in the summer.

Summer was startled when she saw the broken glass all over the ground.

"You broke the glass?"

Yan Hao shook his head expressionlessly.

Summer glanced at him questioningly but said nothing more. She picked up a broom from the corner and began cleaning.

"Teacher Xia, are all girls fickle?" Yan Hao asked thoughtfully.

Summer was amused by this remark. "What's going on in your head? I called on you to answer questions twice in class, and you embarrassed yourself both times! Are you in a relationship?"

Yan Hao lowered his head and sighed. "Sigh, it would have been better not to date at all! Forget it, breaking up would be much easier!" Yan Hao said, pounding the bed board with his fist.

"Tell me! Who did you argue with just now? If you didn't break the glass, then who did?" Xia Tian sat down in a chair after cleaning the floor. She was still smiling.

Yan Hao kept his head down and remained silent.

"Then—I won't ask! You get some rest! Exams are coming up soon! If you have any physiological problems, you can just ask me! Okay?"

Yan Hao nodded. "It's alright, Teacher Xia. I'll handle it." Yan Hao forced a smile.

"Oh, take this!" Xia Tian handed over a large paper package.

"Yes, what is it, Teacher Xia?"

"This is just a small token of my appreciation! Thanks to you for saving Lei Ming's life this time! Consider this 8,000 yuan as a nutritional supplement! Please accept it!" Xia Tian placed the money under Yan Hao's pillow.

Yan Hao quickly pulled the paper packet out again. "No! I don't want it! This is what I should do!"

"Yan Hao, Rh-negative blood is a rare blood type! If you buy it, it'll cost more than this! Take it!"

"Teacher Xia, if you keep saying that, I'll be discharged right now!" Yan Hao's face turned bright red! He threw off the blanket and lifted his leg to get out of bed.

"No!" Xia Tian quickly stopped him with one hand.

"Teacher Xia, look, I'm still a doctor-to-be! Saving lives is my duty, how could I possibly charge money!" Yan Hao deliberately made his tone sound more relaxed.

Xia Tian had no choice but to take back the paper package. "Yan Hao! Thank you! I don't know what to say!" Xia Tian's eyes were a little wet.

"It's nothing, Professor Xia! If you really want to thank me, then hurry up and treat me to wedding candy! Also, ask Professor Luo—ah, no, Professor Luo—not to make the exam questions too difficult!"

Summer was amused by his words.

After the winter solstice, the weather grew increasingly cold. Every morning at five o'clock, when Jiang Boyu stepped out of the dormitory building, he would shiver for a long time. He didn't bring many clothes from home—which caused him a lot of suffering in the south where the temperature difference between day and night was huge and rain and snow were frequent. Even in the coldest weather, he always wore only two sweaters and never bought a decent coat.

Pay off the debt! Pay off the debt! — These two words were the only thought in his mind! His living expenses had been reduced to the bare minimum. Wang Danyang had offered him money — but he refused outright! He didn't want people talking behind his back, saying he was just a "kept man"! This was his last shred of dignity!

Every day, Jiang Boyu's daily milk deliveries were pre-packed by the logistics company into two heavy, insulated metal boxes, which he then hung on either side of his bicycle. In the early mornings, when temperatures dropped to three or four degrees below zero, he would move the boxes by hand—his hands would be so frozen they felt like they were glued to the icy metal. The wind was often strong while riding, and within a few days his hands were red, swollen, and cracked. Wang Danyang saw this and bought him a pair of leather gloves—he only accepted them after much pleading. She even said she would definitely pay him back when she had the money! Jiang Boyu believed that being a boyfriend and being supported by her were completely different concepts!

Delivering milk is a tough and tiring job. Jiang Boyu often climbs seven or eight flights of stairs to deliver a single bottle of milk—as required by the company, he must deliver it to the milk box hanging outside the customer's door—that's a common occurrence. His job also requires extreme caution—many milk delivery workers in the logistics company have learned the hard way that a week or two of their hard work has been wasted when their vehicles overturn and bottles break!

This job, which required getting up early and being on time, as well as being steady and meticulous, caused many people to quit after only two or three days. But Jiang Boyu persevered. He remembered his mother's words—"Suffering is a blessing!" Besides, what other resources did he have besides enduring hardship to repay that enormous debt?

Life went on. Jiang Boyu didn't feel particularly pitiful. Aside from the final disciplinary action that made him grieve for two days—the large white sheet of paper on the bulletin board stated that he was given a one-year probation period, with his student status retained. This was a slightly less severe punishment than expulsion. But it also meant that for a year he couldn't join the Party, couldn't receive awards, couldn't apply for scholarships or loans, and couldn't serve as a leader in his department, class, student union, or clubs. He also had to behave himself and avoid any rash actions—only then could he, with a clean record, submit a report to have the punishment revoked after a year!

"As long as you're still alive, that's good! As long as the green hills remain, there's always hope!"—These were Shen Wei's words of comfort to Jiang Boyu. Wang Danyang also took the opportunity to chat and go for walks with him during those two days, and even told him what Jiang Boyu considered to be the most insightful thing Wang Danyang had ever said—"If you weep when you miss the sun, you will also miss the stars!" Wang Danyang said it was a famous quote from the Indian poet Tagore, but it deeply moved Jiang Boyu. Life is so short, why wallow in self-pity and give up on yourself?

On the night Wang Danyang made those remarks, Jiang Boyu wrote a letter of intent to donate his body for medical research. He didn't want to miss out on his final moments—despite the punishment and pain inflicted by his alma mater, he still cherished and loved his time as a student! He hoped that if, as Master Huiming had said, something unforeseen were to happen, people could use this letter of intent to allow him to rest in peace on this campus that held so many of his stories!

Having delivered milk for almost twenty days, Jiang Boyu has gradually gotten used to the hardship of the job. He can wake up automatically in the morning without an alarm clock. Sometimes he even finds it a real pleasure to ride his bike through the empty streets in the early morning—he hums songs like George Lam's "A Man Should Be Self-Reliant," trying to cheer himself up and find joy amidst the hardship—until that day when he unexpectedly met He Jihong's boyfriend, Lei Ming—he felt that working was fulfilling and happy!

Jiang Boyu has nearly a hundred customers every day. He met Lei Ming when he was delivering milk to a customer named Tian Qianqian. Tian Qianqian lived on the seventh floor of Unit 2, Building 12 in the Liulin residential area near the East Second Ring Road. Every time Jiang Boyu parked his bicycle downstairs, he would rush up the stairs three steps at a time, then panting as he put the milk into the small wooden box hanging on the wall.

Because the milk delivery route was fixed, he arrived there every day around 6:20 in the morning. It was too early, and he had never seen this customer named Tian Qianqian.

He remembered that day was because another customer had a child who needed to attend early morning self-study—so they requested an earlier delivery time. Jiang Boyu adjusted his route, arriving at Liulin Residential Area a little later, around 6:30 PM, at the foot of Building 12. As he rushed up to the seventh floor with his head down to drop off the milk, Tian Qianqian's rust-red security door creaked open. Jiang Boyu instinctively stepped aside—and just as he inadvertently turned his head, he felt the person who came out looked familiar—was it Lei Ming?! Lei Ming, carrying a large backpack, glanced at him—perhaps because Jiang Boyu was wearing a baseball cap for milkmen, and because it was quite dark, he didn't recognize him, and turned and stomped downstairs.

Jiang Boyu stood on the seventh floor in a daze for a while, then hurriedly went down to the corner of the stairs and peered out the window. When Lei Ming walked out of the building, he was certain it was him! There was no mistaking him!

Jiang Boyu waited until Lei Ming was far away before slowly descending the stairs, his legs feeling as heavy as lead. He kept repeating the names Lei Ming and He Jihong in his mind—he had a vague feeling that there should be some connection between the two, even though he had never actually met the girl named Tian Qianqian!

He hadn't expected Lei Ming to live off-campus—but since he was a master's student, the university didn't have the same restrictions on master's students' accommodations as undergraduates, such as not being allowed to rent apartments or stay overnight off-campus. Lei Ming and his classmates were allowed to rent apartments off-campus! Jiang Boyu even wondered if this was Lei Ming's own home? But he remembered He Jihong mentioning once that Lei Ming's hometown was Nanjing, Jiangsu! After thinking it over and over, Jiang Boyu still couldn't figure it out when he got back on his bicycle.

In the afternoon at the cafeteria, he didn't tell He Jihong about what happened that morning. He Jihong, however, noticed he seemed preoccupied and told him to take care of himself!

The next day, Jiang Boyu arrived at Building 12 of Liulin Residential Area before 6:30 a.m. He didn't go upstairs, but stood at the entrance of Unit 3—for a moment he wondered if his actions were dishonest, as if he had come for a secret—and his actions were clearly related to He Jihong—his primal instincts told Jiang Boyu that something was wrong!

That day, Jiang Boyu watched Lei Ming walk out of Unit 2 again—the discovery over the past two days indicated that he hadn't been staying out all night for a short time! Perhaps because he had been standing for so long, Jiang Boyu felt a chill, and his body was gradually cooling down!

He still clutched the milk order form with Tian Qianqian's name on it in his trembling hand. He bit his lower lip, staring at Lei Ming's departing figure with a cold, even hostile gaze! Then he turned and went up to the seventh floor—this time Jiang Boyu didn't rush up; he walked slowly, his steps heavy.

Jiang Boyu was conflicted. He regretted seeing all this—maybe Lei Ming was just staying at a friend's house for two nights? Maybe it was a rented house, but the landlord was someone named Tian Qianqian; maybe it was a relative's house, and he was just staying there temporarily. Jiang Boyu desperately tried to deny the worst thoughts and ideas—but the more "maybes" he came up with, the less he believed those assumptions—almost every time he took a step up the stairs, a big question mark would surface in his mind.

He placed the milk down. Before leaving, he stared at the rust-red security door for a long, long time. He didn't want any secrets to lie inside. He especially didn't want He Jihong to be harmed because of this door!

In the afternoon at the cafeteria, he deliberately avoided He Jihong, and left in a hurry after finishing his meal. He didn't even say a word. When Lei Ming came to find He Jihong with his shoulder bag still slung over his shoulder as he left the cafeteria, Jiang Boyu didn't nod or smile at him, but instead walked past him with his head down and a cold face.

Two days of questions made Jiang Boyu restless. His desire to uncover the secret behind that door grew ever stronger!

On the third day, Jiang Boyu moved Tian Qianqian's milk to the very end of the route map. He arrived at Liulin Residential Area just after 6:50 that day. After climbing upstairs, Jiang Boyu put the milk away and came back down, then wandered around downstairs alone for more than 30 minutes—he was already prepared to skip class to find out what was going on.

Around 7:30, Jiang Boyu, wearing a baseball cap and work clothes, climbed back up to the seventh floor of Unit 2. He found that the milk in the milk box had been taken. He stood quietly for a while, then rang the doorbell of the rust-red security door.

In fact, Jiang Boyu's heart was pounding. He felt like a KGB spy or an FBI agent.

"Who is it?" came a languid voice from inside the house.

"Hello, I'm from the milk delivery company!" Jiang Boyu tried his best to keep his tone polite and calm. He knew there was a peephole on the security door.

The door opened. A girl, still wearing a silk nightgown, with disheveled hair and red, swollen eyes, stood in the doorway. "What do you need? Didn't the milk arrive?"

"Oh, may I ask if Mr. Lei Ming lives here?" This direct approach was something Jiang Boyu had planned long ago.

"Oh, him... he's gone to school. Is there something you need from him?" The girl rubbed her eyes, and from her tone, she seemed to know Lei Ming quite well.

"Our company wants to conduct a survey to see if customers are satisfied with the quality of the delivered milk and the service."

"Oh, it's alright! It's fine, nothing else?" The girl said, about to close the door.

"No, nothing else!" Jiang Boyu didn't know how to continue the conversation. Suddenly, an idea struck him. He changed the subject and asked, "Ah, you're Tian Qianqian from the order, right?"

"Yes!" The girl was clearly getting impatient. Jiang Boyu had actually been observing her carefully. Although her clothes were disheveled, her appearance was not much worse than He Jihong's. She had single-eyelid eyes and a slightly upturned chin, only a little shorter.

"Ah... goodbye, thank you! Sorry to bother you!" Jiang Boyu bowed slightly and then the security door slammed shut.

Jiang Boyu's heart sank! Fortunately, Tian Qianqian was probably still half asleep and didn't ask Jiang Boyu how he knew about Lei Ming—otherwise, he would have been exposed.

The room was dimly lit, but Jiang Boyu didn't hear or see anyone else—which meant she might be living alone with Lei Ming. Besides, she only ordered two servings of milk a day; and she was very young—which meant that unless Tian Qianqian was Lei Ming's cousin, she was unlikely to be his aunt or anything like that!

Although Jiang Boyu didn't figure out the final truth, things had at least made progress. Meanwhile, an ominous premonition grew stronger and stronger in his heart like a dark cloud.

"Do you know someone named Tian Qianqian?" After finishing work in the cafeteria in the afternoon, Jiang Boyu sat down opposite He Jihong again while eating the free dinner.