"A-Ning!" The woman opened her arms, trying to hug the boy standing in the shade of the tree. Her eyes were full of tears, and her tired face was filled with sorrow.
Su Jinning reached out, trying to grasp the woman's hands in the blurry background. But no matter how hard he ran forward, the distance between them remained unchanged. He felt like he was standing still, only able to look at his mother from a few steps away.
Beneath her plain white dress, covered in mud, stood a woman's slender figure. She stood under a streetlamp not far away, tears welling in her eyes.
Seeing her disheveled appearance, Su Jinning felt a deep sense of guilt.
"A-Ning..." the woman called out to him again. Her voice was familiar and gentle, full of longing, and with a touch of etherealness, echoing on the road where only the mother and son were.
He wanted to call her "Mom," to run over and hug her, or even just grab her hand. He wanted to ask her if she was back, to ask her how she had been these past two years.
Suddenly, I heard the words my mother had written in the letter.
"A-Ning, Mom misses you so much, so please wait for Mom a little longer."
"Ah Ning, Mom misses you so much..."
The voice kept repeating in his ears, as if the owner of the voice was right beside him, warmly embracing him.
Su Jinning burst into tears. As he ran forward with all his might, but saw no end in sight, the woman suddenly lowered her eyes, turned around, and left.
"No!" He reached out, trying to grab something. But his mother's figure only lingered between his fingers for a moment before disappearing without a trace.
"Don't!!!"
The white ceiling, the sky just beginning to lighten with the first hint of dawn, the clock showing 5:00—all these things told him the same thing.
It was just a dream.
Su Jinning let out a long, trembling breath, as if relaxing. He slowly reached out to wipe the dense beads of sweat from his forehead, then collapsed wearily onto the bed.
I've been under a lot of stress lately, and I'm always on the go, which has led to poor sleep. When I finally get a good night's rest, I have a nightmare.
Su Jinning reached out and rubbed his cheeks, but even though it was a dream with no suspense, he still felt a real pain in his heart.
In his dream, his mother's departing figure left him behind, just as resolute as when she had disappeared without a trace and gone abroad years ago.
But he always felt that the feeling of his heart being ripped out was hinting at something.
He turned to his side in frustration, stroking the damp patch on his pillow. Even after so long apart, his longing for his mother had only grown stronger.
Thinking of what Shen Moyu said to him last night, a strange, invisible weight settled over his heart.
He buried his head deeper into the pillow. His mind started racing again, and he felt increasingly agitated. He tossed and turned countless times, counting sheep until he could no longer fall asleep.
He opened his eyes; the clock showed only five o'clock. He tossed and turned for almost thirty minutes, thinking he might as well get up and do something.
I just took out my phone when I realized I'd fallen asleep right after getting too tired last night and completely forgotten to charge it.
"Tsk." Su Jinning suddenly felt angry and simply put down her phone, thinking that she might as well not bring it today.
But then he thought, what if Shen Moyu needs him while he's alone in the hospital? What if she doesn't understand something in her notes and wants to message him? What if she's bored and wants to chat?
no.
He got up, grabbed the charging cable next to him, and plugged his phone in. When the phone screen lit up, he sighed and then got out of bed.
Opening the door, a large living room came into view. The lights were off, and it was eerily quiet inside and out. At this hour, even Aunt Cui probably hadn't woken up yet. The staircase not far away was illuminated by a few rays of sunlight, perhaps because it was just sunrise, and it still had a slightly cool, yellowish hue.
He strolled out, and a cool breeze slipped in through the window, instantly sweeping in with the emptiness and loneliness.
Su Jinning opened the refrigerator door, looked around for a while, and finally took out a bottle of cola.
"Sizzle—"
He gently pulled open the can, the abrupt sound breaking the silence of the room. He tilted his head back and gulped down half a bottle of the ice-cold, spicy cola.
A refreshing coolness slid from my throat into my stomach, relieving some of the stuffiness and making me feel less irritable than before.
There was still half a bottle left, and he was afraid that drinking too much cold water so early in the morning would flare up his gastritis again, so he put it in the refrigerator.
As Su Jinning turned to go back to her room, she happened to see a somewhat aged figure at the top of the stairs.
"Oh? Xiao Ning, you're up so early today?" The nanny was tying her apron on as she came down the stairs with a smile.
Su Jinning paused for a moment, then nodded and softly replied, "Yeah, I can't sleep."
The nanny slowly walked to his side, saw him staring blankly at the refrigerator door, smiled and said, "What's wrong? Is our Xiaoning troubled?"
Su Jinning was slightly taken aback, then smiled wearily, her voice softening as if she were pleading, "Aunt Cui, you always guess so accurately."
"Hahaha!" Cui Ping waved her hand and laughed, then closed the refrigerator door for him. "I watched you grow up, how could I not know?" Then she turned around and gently touched Su Jinning's face. "What's wrong?"
With someone keeping her company and saying a few words, Su Jinning suddenly felt a little better, no longer feeling as choked up as before: "It's nothing, just something from school."
Cui Ping sighed, feeling a pang of heartache as she looked at Su Jinning's listless appearance. After all, she had been working as a nanny for the Su family since Su Jinning was five or six years old. The Su family's boss was a kind person, and his wife was easy to get along with; they both treated her like family. Over time, they had developed feelings for each other. She had worked there for over a decade, accompanying the Su family through many ups and downs. To Cui Ping, Su Jinning was more like her own son.
"Seeing my daughter Xiaoning looking so worried makes me feel sorry for her," Cui Ping said softly, frowning.
Not wanting her to worry, Su Jinning forced a smile: "I'm fine, Auntie, you go ahead with your work, I'll head back now."
Cui Ping also put her hands down and reminded her, "It's still early, you should get some more sleep."
Su Jinning nodded and turned to go back to her room. The clock on the wall seemed to have been deliberately slowed down; it felt like half an hour had passed, but it showed 5:40.
Su Jinning walked to the desk and subconsciously turned on the desk lamp.
After hesitating for a long time, he finally took out the jade pendant. It was carved with a rose, a flower his mother loved. But the edges had been smoothed by his constant rubbing.
Opening the folder on the right, one sees a letter whose handwriting is very similar to his. Although the paper is a bit yellowed, it has been well protected by him.
He gently took it out and looked at the warm yet cold words his mother had written for him. A sudden pang of sadness welled up in his heart.
—From mother Yu Wanqing to son Su Jinning.
As her gentle handwriting, as graceful as her appearance, came into view, Su Jinning knew that the warm greeting also contained many stories and longings.
He suppressed the disappointment in his chest and continued reading, until he finally read the sentence: "A-Ning, your mother misses you very much." Tears inexplicably welled up in his eyes, blurring his vision.
The words on the letter were covered with a layer of white mist, perhaps to prevent tears from falling onto the paper, or perhaps Su Jinning was afraid that he would burst into tears. He hurriedly closed the folder, as if afraid that it would open by itself, and pressed it tightly on the top of the bookshelf with books.
Su Jinning sat down again, trying hard to hold back her tears. She quietly buried her head in her arms and slumped wearily onto the table.
In the end, the intense longing described in her mother's letter turned into just a few sheets of paper that were read and then discarded, lying coldly on the bookshelf.
Su Jinning lay there for almost ten minutes before finally succumbing to his frustration. He grabbed a book from the bookshelf, randomly flipped to a page, and forced himself to read on, trying to forget everything that had bothered him that morning.
"Son, is he inside?"