"Giggle, Master, this is so disgusting, so disgusting, so disgusting!" Baozi immediately puffed out its cheeks and pretended to vomit: "Baozi doesn't want to eat poop, doesn't want to, doesn't want to!"
Shi Tou was sweating profusely. "You've eaten this before!" he exclaimed. "And then what? What did my mother say?"
"Hehe, and then! Elder Chishi came!" Baozi lowered his body embarrassedly, almost touching the ground: "Baozi really didn't mean it!"
Just as Baozi finished pooping and was looking around in confusion, Elder Chishi unexpectedly walked in with Fat Mama. It turned out that he had finally discovered that the books in the library were missing that morning. Remembering that no one else had come to the library besides Steel Hammer and his daughter the previous day, he had rushed to Steel Hammer's house to look for his precious books. Elder Chishi knew that the two of them hadn't taken anything when they left, but remembering the books that had mysteriously vanished, he decided to try his luck anyway.
"So, they started arguing?" Stone was speechless. Wasn't this obviously a recipe for misunderstanding? Elder Chishi was only slightly suspicious at first, but when he saw so many books in Stone's room, wouldn't he immediately be certain that Stone was responsible? Even if it wasn't Stone, it was Steel Hammer! But Fat Mama was certain that when she left, there wasn't a single piece of paper in Stone's room. The sudden appearance of that pile of books made people suspect it was a frame-up.
"Giggle, Baozi really doesn't know anything!" Baozi was still pretending to be innocent, but it probably knew it couldn't escape this time, and resignedly rubbed its body: "It's because Master is stupid! If Master hadn't fainted, Baozi wouldn't be like this!"
"If I don't faint, you'll be eating your own poop, right?" Stone grinned broadly, but to Baozi, that smile was terrifying. "So, how should I punish you? By the way, Baozi, do you know what pan-fried buns are?"
Baozi was trembling when she suddenly heard Shitou change the subject. She looked up at Shitou in confusion and said, "Hehe, pan-fried buns? But Baozi is a soup dumpling! Baozi is a smart, lively, cute, kind, sensible, beautiful and generous milk soup dumpling!"
Shi Tou smiled brightly, flashing her white little teeth at Baozi as she laughed: "Baozi, let me tell you, I used to love pan-fried buns the most. The biggest difference between pan-fried buns and other buns is that other buns are steamed in a bamboo steamer, but pan-fried buns are not."
"Giggle, no? Why? Baozi doesn't know what a pan-fried bun is!" Although Baozi knew that Stone wouldn't let it off so easily this time, it really couldn't understand why Stone was saying all this.
"You don't recognize it? No problem, I do!" Shi Tou smiled as he looked at the steamed buns. "The method for making pan-fried buns is similar to other buns, the biggest difference lies in the last step. You put the buns on a huge, sizzling hot iron plate covered in oil and deep-fry them! Fry, deep-fry! Fry the bottoms of the buns until they're crispy on the outside and tender on the inside, fragrant and flavorful. Mmm, that feeling, it's so satisfying~~~"
Staring fiercely at the completely dumbfounded steamed bun, Stone suddenly moved closer to it and roared, "Pan-fried buns, start frying!"
Chapter 50: A Handsome Man Away in the Hundred Meters
In an instant, the big steamed bun turned into a black diamond. Before Stone could even begin to curse, the fat mother's voice came from outside. Stone gritted his teeth, glaring at the black diamond in his hand, cursing with utter hatred: "That damn steamed bun! When I get the chance, she'll definitely turn this soup dumpling into a pan-fried bun!"
"Sweetie, are you being good at home alone? Did you miss Mommy? Oh, and are you hungry?" The first thing the chubby mom did when she walked in was to look Stone up and down. Ever since Stone fell headfirst off the bed that night, the chubby mom hadn't allowed him to sleep alone. Sometimes, Stone felt that his hammer dad's gaze was so resentful…
"Mom, Stone wants to go to school! He wants to go to school!" Nowadays, Stone takes every opportunity to tell his chubby mom and steel hammer dad that he wants to go to school, and he is eager to enter that big library full of all kinds of books again.
The plump mother hesitated. It wasn't that she didn't want Stone to go to school, but rather that the Wise Man's Academy never accepted female dwarves. Elder Red Stone would have been a good candidate, but after the recent commotion, she said, "My dear Stone, you haven't fully recovered yet. Rest at home for a while, and we'll go to school later, okay?"
This time it was Stone's turn to feel endless resentment, but as a little child of only three years old, even though she was the only princess in the Dwarf Kingdom at present, there was nothing she could do: "Mommy, Stone will be good, very good, very good."
"Sigh, Stone, do you really want to go to school that much?" The chubby mother was very worried. In fact, although none of the seven children in the family disliked school, it seemed that none of them loved learning as much as she did!
"Mmm-hmm!" Stone nodded vigorously, "Stone will definitely listen to Elder Wise and study hard!" Yeah, right! Stone mentally gave him the middle finger. Humph, after she gets Baozi to eat all the books in the library, whoever wants to go to school can go!
"Okay, let Mommy talk to Daddy again!" The plump mother hugged Shitou, patted his little head lovingly and tenderly, and suddenly sighed deeply: "Oh, my dear Shitou, Shitou is already three years old this year, sigh..."
Stone was completely bewildered, not understanding why his chubby mother had become so sorrowful. What was wrong with her being three? It wasn't like in her previous life, where she was almost thirty and still unmarried. Wait, something was wrong. Stone suddenly felt a chill. Three years old? That meant that in two more years, his true identity would be impossible to hide anymore?!
The horrified Stone didn't notice that the fat mother was carrying her out. By the time she realized what was happening, she was already back in the smelting furnace she had visited before.
Stone lamented the dwarves' self-torture (putting themselves in a stuffy, hot furnace to forge iron—what else could it be but self-torture) while also sighing about his own future. Forging iron—was that a skill a girl should learn?
"Hey, Stone's here!" Steel Hammer Dad was busy working at a forging table when he suddenly saw his beloved Stone coming in with his arms. He immediately handed his work to Flame and greeted him with a big smile: "Stone, do you want Daddy to teach you how to forge iron?"
No, no, no!
Stone shook his little head like a rattle-drum, and Steel Hammer Daddy's face turned green. Why did his darling dislike his skills so much? "Stone, how about Daddy teaches Stone how to forge iron?"
"Mommy, waaaaah!" Stone suddenly burst into tears, then buried his entire face in his plump mother's ample bosom.
Immediately, Steel Hammer's father was helpless. What kind of child is this? Why is he so clever?
The plump mother was both amused and exasperated: "Alright, alright, baby, don't cry. Daddy was just joking with you! Our Shitou doesn't do blacksmithing, okay?"
good……
Stone really wanted to cheer loudly, but she caught a glimpse of Steel Hammer's expression and immediately swallowed the words she was about to say. Forget it, an old man who's disliked by everyone isn't someone to mess with!
“Honey, I think Stone is in good spirits today, so I took her out for a walk. By the way, Stone has been resting at home for so long, how about we try visiting Elder Chishi again?” After coaxing Stone, the chubby mother began to discuss the matter with Steel Hammer Dad in a tentative tone.
But Steel Hammer Daddy immediately gets angry whenever he hears the words "Elder Red Stone": "No way! Stone is absolutely not allowed to go to Elder Red Stone's place. How can anyone slander someone like that? Don't say Stone is still young. When I went to pick her up, she didn't bring anything with her. Even if she's grown up and borrowed a few books from there, she wouldn't insult people like that!"
What a heavy resentment! Stone pursed his lips, secretly reaching into his pocket and pinching the black diamond that the bun had turned into with his pink fingernails.
“But…” The fat mother wanted to say something more, but Steel Hammer Dad waved his hand, signaling her to listen to him.
"Alright, after lunch, I'll take Stone down into the mine! Going to school is important, but among us dwarves, there are those who don't go to school, but there are none who don't go into the mine! Stone, come down into the mine with Dad this afternoon!" Steel Hammer Dad reached out and pinched Stone's tender little cheek, leaving a red mark.
The plump mother gently blew on Stone's little face with a pained expression, then glared fiercely at Steel Hammer's father several times. But Stone didn't seem to mind at all; perhaps she had initially wanted to, but Steel Hammer's father's words had scared her away. Going down into the mine...
In her past life, Stone had no connection with mines; at least, she had never seen one with her own eyes. Her only impression was of the various mine accidents that were exposed every now and then: collapses, flooding, gas explosions, rope breakage due to overloading… a whole host of accidents! With such terrifying memories, do you think Stone would dare go down into the mine? Would she dare?!
"Stone! Stone!" After lunch, Stone didn't even take a nap before being carried to the mine entrance by Steel Hammer Daddy. Upon seeing the dark opening, resembling the gaping maw of a giant beast, Stone's heart immediately sank. Seriously, even with Heaven's advanced technology, they still have safety accidents, and here… why does this seem so far-fetched?
"Didn't Stone just eat his fill? What, isn't he full yet?" Steel Hammer Daddy now connects every question about Stone to food with the most rapid speed!
Stone covered his face, "I'm not a glutton!" "Daddy, Stone, don't go in! Don't go!" He resolutely refused to enter the mine; that place was absolutely suitable for minors!
Steel Hammer Dad looked at him incredulously: "Why? Didn't Stone go in there before?"
"Oh yeah!" Stone suddenly remembered. She really had been inside before, and more than once! The first time was when she brought back that shameless little bun from the mine; the second time was when Qimei threw her into an abandoned mine, but she still found the little bun. Seriously, buns and mines really have a connection!
Although neither of these two memories was particularly pleasant, it seems like nothing serious happened either. Stone fell into deep thought. Could it be that the mine wasn't so dangerous after all? Then why did he only hear about various accidents in his previous life, but never about any of the top ten safest mines?
"Gaga, Master, there's a handsome man a hundred meters ahead! A handsome man! A top-notch handsome man! The most beloved handsome man in Master's eyes! A handsome man that Master will definitely drool over!" Baozi's incredibly annoying voice suddenly rang in Stone's mind.
Chapter 51: A Simplified Version of an Elevator
In that instant, only one thought remained in Stone's mind: To immediately take out the big steamed bun and absolutely, utterly, utterly, utterly crush it!!!
"Stone, come into the mine with Daddy!" Steel Hammer Daddy coaxed Stone in a low voice as he walked into the mine.
Stone was completely defeated by Baozi. He lay listlessly on Steel Hammer Daddy's shoulder, his face drooping as he silently recalled all the curses he had used in his past life, applying them all to Baozi. He completely ignored Steel Hammer Daddy.
"Gah gah, ahead! Right ahead! Wrong, wrong, not this way! Wrong, wrong!" Baozi shouted anxiously in Shi Tou's mind.
Stone was very suspicious. Who was more fond of handsome men? "Shut up, shut up, shut up..." Because he was too close to Steel Hammer Daddy, Stone didn't dare to say anything. He just moved his mouth and cursed silently, hoping that his resentment would be transmitted directly to Baozi.
Clearly, Stone was destined for utter disappointment. Baozi, oblivious to Stone's inner turmoil, continued to yell in Stone's mind, "Gaga, wrong! What to do, what to do? Master, the handsome man is gone! We're going the wrong way!"
What could she do? Stone rolled her eyes in annoyance. She was just a three-year-old child, utterly useless! Besides, could there be any handsome men in this dwarf kingdom? A handsome man needed good looks, a good physique, and a certain air about him. For the dwarves of the dwarf kingdom, their height was their greatest tragedy; any handsome man was ruined by their pitiful stature.
"Gaga, handsome man! Handsome man is gone! Baozi can't feel any handsome man anymore! That damned dwarf old man! Baozi has no handsome man to look at!" Baozi's voice became more and more mournful, and in the end, he simply burst into tears.
Stone shook her head uneasily, but the sound of crying kept echoing in her mind, which made her even more determined to torment Baozi when she got back! "Daddy, Stone wants to come down, wants to come down!"
Steel Hammer Baba stopped and looked at the stone with a puzzled expression: "Why did we come down? The road here is difficult to walk on!" He looked around and saw that this area was a mine that had been mined long ago, so the ore here had long been completely mined out.
"No, no, Stone has grown up, Stone wants to walk by himself! Waaah..." Stone's mind was filled with the cries of that damned bun, and involuntarily, Stone also started to cry along with it. Humph, anyway, Steel Hammer Daddy is the most susceptible to this kind of thing!
"This..." Steel Hammer Dad hesitated. He knew his precious daughter well. Although Stone was still young, she had always been stubborn and obstinate. If she wanted to do something, she had to get it done. "Alright then."
In the end, Steel Hammer Dad gave in to Stone's suggestion and put Stone on the ground: "But Stone, you have to be careful, or you'll fall and cry again!"
No sooner had she finished speaking than Stone fell to the ground with a "plop," landing face-first in the dirt in a rather unseemly manner. Instantly, Stone was furious: "Woo-la-woo-la..." That damned Steel Hammer Daddy, how dare he curse her like that! This is simply intolerable!
Steel Hammer Daddy still felt wronged! He scooped his still wailing daughter up from the ground and comforted her helplessly, "Stone, be good, the ground here is always difficult to walk on!" Sigh, well, he's doomed because of this precious daughter. He resignedly wiped away Stone's tears and continued clearing the way!
Stone, perched on Steel Hammer's shoulder, felt wave after wave of sorrow. Even after Baozi turned into a black diamond, it wouldn't stop, hiding in Stone's pocket and relentlessly unleashing its taunts: "Gaga, Master! Master has shrunk and become stupid! Wahahahaha, so stupid!"
Stone gritted her teeth, secretly clutching the black diamond in her pocket. Why could that damn bun transmit messages to her, but she couldn't transmit messages to it? Before she fed the bun, its abilities were very weak; it could only transmit one sentence to Stone at most. But now, the bun was well-fed and watered, and it talked a lot of nonsense every day. If it were just nonsense, that wouldn't be so bad, but that bun had inexplicably learned the art of taunting, and it always used it on her!
"Giggle, Master! Baozi is hungry!" After using his taunt skill once again, Baozi habitually cried out that he was hungry.
Stone was already used to Baozi's big appetite. After all, Baozi didn't need to eat every day; if it was hungry, it was hungry! "Daddy, Stone wants to go home, wants to go home!" Although the mine seemed fine for now, Stone was still terrified of the place because of the traumatic news about mining disasters from her past life. Besides, if they got home quickly, she could find a chance to get Baozi out and give it a good meal!
"Sweetie, we'll go home when it's time for dinner, okay?" Steel Hammer Daddy patted Stone's little head affectionately as he stopped.
Stone, of course, sensed Steel Hammer's movements and curiously turned to look. Little did she know, what she saw nearly scared the wits out of her: "Whoa whoa~~~"
Looking at his beloved daughter, who was crying loudly again, Steelhammer Daddy didn't even have the heart to wallow in self-pity. Alas, human children are still human children; even if raised by dwarves, they can't change humanity's cowardly, lazy, cunning, and other vices. Fortunately, Stone is still young; besides being cowardly, she probably hasn't learned anything else yet, right?
Steel Hammer Daddy, you're really wrong this time. As a typical 21st-century homebody and single woman, Stone's dictionary doesn't just contain a little bit of derogatory terms.
"Daddy, let's go home!" Stone was truly terrified this time, for no other reason than that she saw the subway not far away...
Okay, so as a modern 21st-century woman, even if she's a homebody, she shouldn't be afraid of the subway, right? If the subway in the dwarf kingdom were horizontal like 21st-century subways, then there's indeed nothing to be afraid of. But the key point is…
"Sweetie, how about Daddy takes you to ride the elevator?" Steel Hammer Daddy first wiped away Shitou's tears, then gently patted her back, and said in a very tempting tone, "The elevator is a lot of fun! Shitou will definitely like it!"
"I don't like it! I don't like it! I don't like it!" Stone shook her little head like a rattle-drum. Of course Stone recognized the elevator; in the 21st century, it had a more elegant name—elevator. No matter how much of a homebody Stone was in her past life, she was certainly very familiar with elevators.
However, the elevators in the Dwarf Kingdom are a simplified version...
☆, Chapter 52 Might as well just kill me
Shi Tou's feelings were very complicated. Although she had ridden countless elevators in her previous life, including simple ones, luxurious ones, and fully transparent ones, even the last type, which was extremely challenging to her mental fortitude, was no match for the super simple elevator in front of her.
Waaah, even the stone is embarrassed to call that an elevator!
A huge steel pipe stands in the middle, and a simplified version of the elevator is built around it.
The massive steel pipe was encased in another hollow steel pipe, barely taller than the steel hammer itself. It had several steel rings on it, clearly for securing the body, though Stone doubted its safety. The hollow steel pipe connected to a base, about two meters square, made of several welded steel blocks. Of course, they weren't completely welded together; there were noticeable gaps between the steel blocks.
And then... that was it.
Stone struggled desperately: "Daddy! Stone wants to go home! Wants to go home!" Good heavens, what a shoddy construction project! This is it! The elevator doesn't even have a safety railing!
"Alright, alright, Stone, don't be afraid!" Because of Stone's struggles, Steel Hammer Dad had to hold Stone with both hands and slowly walk up the elevator: "Oh dear, if Stone moves again, Dad won't be able to hold onto the steel ring anymore."
Instantly, the stone stopped moving. What a joke! Since she had to sit down, she had to get off safely and get back up safely! Although, now it seemed, that goal was a little too ambitious.
"Hehe..." Steel Hammer Daddy laughed slyly. How could he not understand Stone's little scheme? However, no matter what Stone's background was, as long as she still called him Dad, he had an obligation to teach Stone how to become a proper dwarf!