Each vibration of the phone was like a knife piercing deeper into Shen Zhifei's heart; the happier Song Lang laughed, the more blood he bled.
I should have thought of this a long time ago.
He should have known this day would come back that summer in Hawaii. Song Lang would fall in love sooner or later, but that person, no matter what, would never be him.
Why not stop indulging in unrealistic fantasies sooner?
Shen Zhifei bit her lip tightly, cursing herself inwardly: Serves you right, Shen Zhifei. You brought this on yourself.
Song Lang glanced over unintentionally and saw that his brother's eyes were closed. He called out "Feifei" softly a few times, but received no response. He sent "Goodnight" to Anru, then put his phone on silent and placed it aside. He also tucked the blanket around Shen Zhifei's back to keep him warm from the cold wind.
The room returned to darkness, and Shen Zhifei's trembling eyelashes held back tears that eventually dripped silently onto the pillow.
He reached out and hugged Song Lang's waist, burying his head deeply in the other's neck. He told himself: just for this one night, I will never be this close to him again.
"Non-non?"
Song Lang was puzzled. He ruffled Song Lang's hair, and the arm around Song Lang's waist tightened its grip.
"You're not asleep?"
Song Lang grabbed Shen Zhifei's ear, forcing him to leave his neck.
Shen Zhifei pressed her forehead against Song Lang's chin and responded softly, "Mmm."
"You seem a bit strange today," Song Lang said, gently tapping Shen Zhifei's forehead with his chin. This was a unique way of showing affection to Shen Zhifei. "Tell me, did someone at school bully you on purpose? Your injury..."
"Well, I guess so," Shen Zhifei interrupted him, saying, "Song Lang, you'll date her, right?"
Song Lang was speechless for a moment, not understanding why the topic had changed so suddenly, and even more puzzled by his solemn address.
Shen Zhifei didn't expect an answer and continued to ask, "What does it feel like to like someone?"
"I don't really understand either."
For Song Lang, liking someone meant the more than thirty love letters Lin Qian sent him and the messages An Ru sent him every day at the same time. If asked to describe his feelings, he couldn't find any words to describe them.
However, he had a clue about his previous doubts: his brother's unusual behavior today must be because he was troubled by love.
"Feifei, do you... have someone you like?"
“Hmm,” Shen Zhifei hugged him tighter, “There’s someone I really like, but he doesn’t know, and I don’t dare let him know.”
Song Lang asked, "Why?"
Shen Zhifei's heart clenched. "Because... he's going to be with someone else."
"I don't believe it. Who can compare to you?" In Song Lang's mind, Shen Zhifei was always outstanding and dazzling. Even if he sat in the corner without saying a word, he could definitely attract his attention immediately.
He couldn't believe that a boy with both good looks and substance could be outdone by someone else.
That girl is definitely blind.
Shen Zhifei buried her head in his neck again, nuzzling him like a small animal. "I lost from the start. My feelings... are not good enough for him."
Song Lang could tell he was very sad, but he had never been good at comforting people, and for a long time he could only think of the phrase "There are plenty of fish in the sea".
"Go to sleep." Shen Zhifei dared not continue. His emotional dam was in danger of collapsing at any moment, and he could not say anything more.
Song Lang let him hold him, gently stroking Shen Zhifei's hair as he slowly drifted off to sleep.
The curtains weren't fully drawn, and moonlight shone through the gaps, giving Shen Zhifei a sliver of light that allowed her to glimpse Song Lang's sleeping face.
This was probably the longest embrace they had ever shared in their lives.
A voice deep inside him, like a demon, tempted him: Go, go quickly, do what you want, get what you want.
In the narrow beam of moonlight, Shen Zhifei slowly propped herself up, her gaze fixed on Song Lang's deep, peaceful sleeping face, her breathing becoming cautious.
Go quickly while he's asleep; he won't know.
Shen Zhifei leaned forward, his gaze fixed on those two lips so close to his own, and his heart pounded with nervousness.
—What are you waiting for? This is your last chance, or you'll regret it for the rest of your life. Don't hesitate any longer; after all, he's not your biological brother.
Shen Zhifei licked his dry lips, then very slowly and gently leaned in and pressed his cool lips against the lips he had longed for for so long.
He held his breath, lowered his eyes, and his eyelashes fluttered like the wings of Cupid.
What is liking?
Liking someone is like the bright, ambiguous moonlight on a young man's lips; it is the bittersweet feeling that comes late and then fades away; it is the luck and sigh that disappears into silence.
Chapter 017
Shen Zhifei returned to school early the next morning. When he left, Song Lang was still asleep.
"Why? Isn't today Saturday?" Upon hearing this news, Song Lang ran out of his room without even putting on his slippers.
Shen Lingyu changed into high heels in the entryway and prepared to go out. "It seems like the school is doing some kind of experimental class extra training."
Song Lang was puzzled: "They're only in the first year of high school, what are they scolding them for?"
"How would I know?" Shen Lingyu pointed to his bare feet. "Looking for illness in the dead of winter? Go back and put on your shoes."
"Oh." Song Lang looked annoyed, walked back, then turned back and leaned against the doorframe, asking, "Beautiful lady, how long is your business trip this time?"
"It's been more than half a month. I've put your and Feifei's living expenses on the coffee table. If it's not enough, call your dad, understand?"