A pure heart in a jade pot

Chapter 162

Yelü Pusa ordered the civil official Xihe to take Ning Jin and others to the Datong Hall. He did not accompany them but instead delivered the annual tribute to the national treasury, where he checked the list with the handover officials and counted the amount deposited into the treasury.

Even without the civil official Xi He leading the way, Mo Yan still remembered the route to Datong Hall. Since entering Zhongjing, she had been looking closely by the carriage window and found that almost nothing had changed. Many shops were still the same as before, only the signs were a bit older.

Upon arriving at Datong Hall, Zhao Yu, knowing that his attendants had already come by galloping horse to inform him of their imminent arrival, insisted on waiting in front of the hall despite the maids' advice.

"Little Imperial Uncle..."

Upon seeing Ning Jin alight from the carriage, Zhao Yu called out, but then couldn't utter a single word. A lump formed in her throat, tears welled in her eyes, and she smiled directly at Ning Jin.

“Little Yu’er…” Ning Jin’s eyes also reddened slightly, “…you have suffered so much these years.”

Upon hearing this, Wu Zichu coughed a few times to signal Ning Jin, since the civil official Xi He was standing right next to him, and he should not give the Liao people any reason to criticize him.

"Princess." Mo Yan stepped forward, suppressing her sobs, and smiled faintly.

Zhao Yu was delighted to see her and took her hand, saying with a smile, "You're here too, that's great. Over the years, I've often thought how wonderful it would have been if you hadn't gone back to Kaifeng and we had stayed together."

Zhao Yu looked much thinner and more haggard than she had three years ago. The spoiled and willful princess from their first meeting was nowhere to be seen. Mo Yan imagined she must be very unhappy being all alone. A wave of pity washed over Mo Yan, and without thinking, she blurted out, "Then I won't go back. I'll stay here with you, okay?"

Before Zhao Yu could answer, she noticed Ning Jin's gaze towards Mo Yan. This usually carefree young imperial uncle actually had a hint of nervousness in his eyes. She then smiled and said, "I'm already very happy that you're here now. Come on, what are we all doing standing here? I've had them prepare some wine and food inside. You must be hungry after traveling all this way. Let's go in, eat, and talk."

Mo Yan and Ning Jin both felt ashamed upon hearing this. On their way here, they had boiled some soup on the stove in the carriage and ordered a piece of raw mutton. Mo Yan sliced it into thin slices, and the two of them ate hot pot mutton all the way, so their stomachs were naturally very full.

"Zichu, come along too."

Ning Jin called to Wu Zichu and led the way inside.

During the meal, Ning Jin, afraid of upsetting Zhao Yu, only rambled on about the interesting things that had happened in the capital this year. When he couldn't remember something, he would give Wu Zichu a wink, signaling him to pick up where he left off. Knowing their intentions, Mo Yan occasionally joined in the fun, rambling on about some comical cases to make Zhao Yu laugh.

They chatted for a long time, and before the food and wine were even touched, they were all taken away. The maids then brewed tea and brought it up.

"Father, how is his health?"

Ning Jin laughed and said, "That's great. A few months ago, he was saying he wanted to go hunting in the hunting grounds with me, but unfortunately he just couldn't find the time."

Zhao Yu smiled slightly: "Then I'm relieved. It's a pity that I, as a daughter, can't be there to enjoy her company."

“What you have done is more important than simply enjoying the company of your parents.” Ning Jin remained silent for a long time before saying, “...My brother has always felt sorry for you, and he thinks you will resent him. He often blames himself.”

Zhao Yu shook his head with a faint smile: "My father has his difficulties, how could I not understand? Little Imperial Uncle, you once said that as members of the royal family, we naturally have to shoulder more responsibilities than others. It is fate, I have nothing to complain about."

She spoke these words softly, but they were filled with bitterness. The words "it was fate" made Mo Yan's face change, and she thought about them in a daze...

As the saying goes, what is destined to be yours will be yours, and what is not, you cannot force.

Scenes of her past with Zhan Zhao flashed before her eyes, and she couldn't help but wonder if she had been forcing things.

If she hadn't confessed her feelings to him, perhaps she and Zhan Zhao would have just been like brother and sister to each other.

If she hadn't followed him to the Liao Kingdom, perhaps Zhan Zhao wouldn't have agreed to marry her.

If I hadn't married him, perhaps, perhaps Zhan Zhao wouldn't have died!

Thinking of this, her mind was in complete chaos. She only vaguely felt that if she hadn't forced things, perhaps nothing would have happened. It was precisely because she forced things at every step that she was ultimately not destined for it, and thus Heaven took Zhan Zhao away.

Is that really the case?

What should she do? Even if she regrets it now, there's no going back. So what should she do? What should she do? What should she do? ...

Seeing her pale face and blank expression, Ning Jin waved his hand in front of her eyes and asked in surprise, "Girl, what's wrong?"

Mo Yan stared at him blankly, her eyes empty and lifeless, which sent chills down Ning Jin's spine. Confused as to why she had suddenly become like this, he jumped up and shook Mo Yan violently: "Have you been possessed? Zichu, come quick!"

Zhao Yu was also startled and leaned over, asking anxiously, "Did she eat something strange?"

Wu Zichu was also puzzled, so he simply reached out and pinched Mo Yan's philtrum hard. Mo Yan cried out in pain and finally came to her senses.

Mo Yan looked up at everyone, then suddenly burst into tears, sobbing uncontrollably. Everyone was at a loss, not knowing what was wrong with her.

"Girl, what's wrong with you?" Ning Jin was so anxious that he was pacing around in circles. "What exactly happened? Tell me! Why did you suddenly start crying?"

"...It was me..." Mo Yan buried her head, sobbing uncontrollably, and said haltingly, "I...hurt...Big Brother...I..."

Zhao Yu couldn't hear clearly, and Ning Jin didn't understand either. He frowned and asked, "What did you say? Say it again."

"She said that she was the one who killed Brother Zhan." Wu Zichu understood.

Ning Jin was taken aback and asked in surprise, "Why did she suddenly say that?"

Wu Zichu shrugged and spread his hands.

Although Zhao Yu didn't understand what Mo Yan meant, she knew Mo Yan's deep affection for Zhan Zhao and that she was a sentimental person. She guessed that Mo Yan was probably stuck in a rut, so she gently patted Mo Yan's back and softly comforted her.

Ning Jin looked at Mo Yan and shook his head repeatedly, not knowing what to say.

After a long while, Mo Yan gradually stopped crying, slowly raised her head, her face streaked with tears, still sobbing.

Ning Jin turned to the maid and instructed her to bring a hot towel to wash her face. He sighed and said, "Girl, you've finished crying. Now you can tell us why you cried."

“I…” Mo Yan sniffed, “I was thinking…” She slowly spoke out what she had just been thinking, and as she spoke, she felt sad again and couldn’t help but shed tears again.

After hearing this, Zhao Yu and Wu Zichu were alright, they just shook their heads and smiled bitterly, knowing that she had indeed gotten stuck in a rut for a moment; while Ning Jin frowned with a sullen face, seemingly so angry that he didn't even want to speak.

"You silly girl..." he sighed, pointing at her nose.

Seeing the expressions on everyone's faces, Mo Yan asked curiously, "What, don't you all think what I said makes sense?"

"What logic is there? You've been making things up from the beginning." Ning Jin couldn't help but want to scold her, but seeing her still red eyes, he couldn't bring himself to do it.