Ghost Pot - Chapter 60
"You, come here..." Director Wen pointed to the oldest, thin, and bony "Wormhead" among them and said, "Please pay attention to this person, leaders."
The old, unruly man slowly walked forward, bowed to the Standing Committee members, and asked, "What are your orders, sir?"
"Sir?" County Magistrate Shangguan found the question intriguing and asked, "What's your name? How old are you?"
"My surname is Dongfang, my given name is Hong, and I am sixty-one years old," the old "roughneck" who called himself "Dongfang Hong" replied respectfully.
"'The East Is Red'? Haha... What a name..." the propaganda minister said, unable to suppress a laugh.
"What year did you die?" Director Wen demanded sternly.
"I...died in the twelfth month of the thirty-fourth year of the Republic of China," Dongfang Hong replied meekly.
“The 34th year of the Republic of China, that is 1945! Oh dear, he has been dead for 37 years!” County Magistrate Shangguan exclaimed.
"Sixty-one years old?" The propaganda minister did some quick calculations and sensed something was off, so he asked, "Dongfang Hong, what year were you born?"
“The younger one was born in the ninth year of the Guangxu Emperor’s reign, the Year of the Monkey,” Dongfang Hong replied.
"Emperor Guangxu ascended the throne in the first month of 1875... Nine years later it was 1884, and now it's 1982. My goodness, you are ninety-eight years old this year!" the propaganda minister exclaimed in astonishment.
County Magistrate Shangguan sized up Dongfang Hong, shook his head, and said with considerable suspicion, "Dongfang Hong, tell me the truth, are you a 'Worm-Headed Barbarian'?"
“Reporting to your question, sir, I am 'Worm-Headed Barbarian',” Dongfang Hong admitted.
"There are 'wriggling barbarians' who died years later than you who have already broken out of their coffins, so why are you still staying in the coffin underground?" Director Wen asked, puzzled.
"Sir, I'm in poor health and weak. For so many years, I haven't been able to open that coffin lid. Thanks to your arrival last night, I was finally able to see the light of day again," Dongfang Hong said, tears streaming down his face. County Magistrate Shangguan and the Standing Committee members exchanged bewildered glances, not knowing whether to laugh or cry.
"You say you are a 'Worm-headed Barbarian,' but do you have any evidence?" County Magistrate Shangguan was still not quite convinced.
Dongfang Hong smiled shyly and said, "We can all turn our heads..." With that, his neck cracked, and his head turned 180 degrees backward...
Everyone was taken aback and stood there dumbfounded.
When Dongfang Hong turned his face to the back, he couldn't turn it any further. So he grabbed his chin with both hands and forcefully turned it back. Then he straightened up and said apologetically, "I'm not feeling well, I can only turn half a circle."
“As expected, it is a ‘humanoid worm-headed barbarian’…” Magistrate Shangguan muttered to himself.
"And you? What's your name?" Director Wen asked, pointing to the most burly young man among them.
"Xiong Dahai." The burly man's voice was loud and deep.
"Can you transfer..." Director Wen asked.
Before Director Wen could finish speaking, Xiong Dahai's head started spinning in circles, more than ten times in total.
"Alright, alright, I give up," County Magistrate Shangguan chuckled.
"Lunch is served..." At this moment, a guard carried a large enamel basin filled with golden cornbread, which he had bought from a nearby village.
The "wriggling barbarians" stretched out their handcuffed hands and grabbed large flatbreads, wolfing them down.
"It smells so good! I haven't eaten anything for decades..." Dongfang Hong said with a tsk-tsk sound.
"They eat grain too?" County Magistrate Shangguan said with a smile.
"Their appearance, speech, and eating habits are the same as ours," Director Wen explained.
"So, when they're developing underground, do they eat nothing?" the propaganda minister asked, puzzled.
"How much can a mere insect eat? Without exercise, it naturally consumes less energy," County Magistrate Shangguan replied with a smile. As the head of the county, he was naturally very proud that his county had captured so many strange 'insect people'.
"Dongfang Hong, can you two get married?" the organization minister asked.
Holding the flatbread in his hand, Dongfang Hong blushed and said shyly, "Sir, of course, we have to make a living too."
“What I mean is,” the organization minister quietly pointed to Dongfang Hong’s crotch, chuckled lewdly, and said, “can you do that kind of thing too?”
Dongfang Hong's face turned even redder, and he stammered, "Sir, I'm a man too..."
County Magistrate Shangguan laughed and asked directly, "What are you planning to do after you break out of the coffin?"
"Well...we have to listen to our father," Dongfang Hong stammered in response.
"Dad? You have a dad?" the organization minister asked warily.
"Forget it," Secretary Xing, who had remained silent, waved his hand impatiently and said, "We can't listen to what these 'insect people' have to say. Let Director Wen and the others interrogate them slowly. Let's go."
The guards locked the door again and watched the county leaders leave.
The van left the secret hideout and sped back to the county town.
"Secretary Xing, I have prepared a simple meal at the bureau. Please join us for lunch," Director Wen warmly invited.
Secretary Xing smiled slightly and said, "I have some other matters to attend to, so please invite County Chief Shangguan and the others to join us."
Back at the county committee, Secretary Xing, carrying his briefcase, rode his bicycle back to his residence.
"Dad, I'm back." Secretary Xing greeted respectfully as he opened the door and entered the house.
An elderly man sitting on a sofa, reading the People's Daily, slowly turned around...
He is Li Dihuo...
"You saw them?" Li Dihuo put down his newspaper and asked calmly.
"I saw them. They were all handcuffed and only given dry cornbread. It was heartbreaking to see..." Secretary Xing's tone lost its usual authority, and he spoke with a pitiful sadness.
"Hmm, how many have the police arrested so far?" Li Dihuo asked.
"Ten, we should have found them all by tonight," Secretary Xing replied.
"Damn it, that old woman is really hateful. As soon as she arrives, everything is ruined," Li Dihu cursed through gritted teeth.
"Dad, I'll figure out a way to deal with this old Taiwanese woman," Secretary Xing said, clenching his fist.
“No, don’t concern yourself with the old woman’s affairs, lest you reveal your identity,” Li Dihuo instructed. “Just continue living your life, find a woman to marry, and your father will handle the rest.”
"Can I get married now?" Secretary Xing asked, unable to contain his joy.
“Well, we ‘Wormhead Barbarians’ are also human. Although we are hermaphroditic, our original hosts still had a set of phalluses. You can just leave the female organs that you hide in your necks unused,” Li Dihuo said frankly.
"Dad, I've never dared to touch a woman before. I wonder if this penis is still working?" Secretary Xing lowered his head and touched his crotch, saying with some concern.
Li Dihu chuckled lewdly and said, "Don't worry, we're just as good as those little 'errand boys.' You know, we're the 'Worm-Headed Barbarians,' you'll understand for yourself..."
"That puts my mind at ease," Secretary Xing breathed a sigh of relief.
“I’m leaving Nong’an tomorrow night,” Li Dihuo said.
"Father, are you going back to the interior?" Secretary Xing asked.
“Well, I arranged to meet the old woman in Hedong, Shanxi. It’s time for revenge. Oh, by the way, where are all your brothers locked up?” Li Dihuo asked.
"In the 'Yan Erbizi' bay on the Yitong River in Kaoshan Township, in those empty houses left behind by the Japanese," Secretary Xing explained the address in detail.
"I know about that place. Father will take care of it before dawn tomorrow." Li Dihu nodded, then yawned and went inside to sleep.
In the afternoon, Secretary Xing summoned Minister Zhao from the Publicity Department and explained to him that he had decided to give up his celibacy and was preparing to find a partner, asking him to act as a matchmaker.
"Oh, that's wonderful, Secretary Xing! Ever since you were transferred from the interior to this county, you've been living alone, eating in the canteen, enduring the sweltering heat without anyone to fan you, and the freezing cold without anyone to warm your bed. It breaks our hearts to see you like this... To be honest, you're in your forties, in your prime, and the local official of Nong'an. What kind of woman can't you have? There are plenty of young women out there. Secretary Xing, don't worry, I'll take care of everything. Tell me what kind of girl you'd like: a pretty face, big breasts, or a big butt?" Minister Zhao said enthusiastically.
"This, I'm not good at..." Secretary Xing blushed.
"Pretty faces attract attention, big breasts warm people up, you'll experience it in winter, like a little stove, and big butts, they'll give birth to boys..." Minister Zhao recited the list as if it were his own treasure.
"Are there any women who have all three of these qualities?" Secretary Xing asked shyly.
"Ha, Secretary Xing certainly has refined taste. Don't worry, out of hundreds of thousands of people in Nong'an County, I guarantee he'll be chosen," Minister Zhao said, patting his chest as a guarantee.
Chapter 88 of the main text
That night, the "Spring Crackdown" team dug up all the graves in the archives and captured another twenty-six "humanoid worm-headed barbarians." To date, a total of 101 graves have been excavated, dating back to the September 18 Incident in 1931, including the Japanese occupation, the Kuomintang rule, and the period after liberation—a total of 51 years. Among them, Section Chief Hu's younger brother was burned alive by Old Man Hu with oil, and the larvae inside Wang Laonian were thrown into the stove by the Hakka grandmother and turned to ashes. Those from earlier years had already broken out of their coffins and disappeared, while those from recent years were still immature and their bodies remained in a dormant state. In short, all thirty-six "humanoid worm-headed barbarians" were captured, and the crackdown operation concluded successfully.
Before dawn, the action team gathered on the shore of "Yan Er Bizi" bay. Director Wen gave a brief summary, while Hakka Granny and Shen Caihua stood at the back of the line.
"Comrades, under the correct deployment and direct command of the county party committee and the county government, our bureau's 'Spring Crackdown Operation' has achieved a decisive victory, solving 102 unsolved cases dating back to the Japanese occupation period, arresting 36 'insect men,' and none of our officers were injured or killed. Comrades, all officers who participated in this operation will be commended and rewarded. In addition, the bureau's party group has consulted with the county party committee and decided to give each of you a bonus of 250 yuan..." Director Wen said passionately.
A round of applause erupted, and the officers present were overjoyed. In those days, bonuses were still a novelty, and the amount was quite substantial.
"Comrades," Director Wen continued, "all details of this operation are top state secrets. No one is allowed to disclose them. Otherwise, they will be severely punished by the organization and their bonuses will be revoked. Do you all understand?"
"Understood," everyone answered in unison.
"Except for the guards, everyone else, return to the county town now," Director Wen ordered.
The officers boarded several vans and jeeps, and for a moment the engines roared and the lights shone everywhere.
The Hakka woman said to Officer Qi, "Captain Qi, it's almost dawn, and the children are sleepy. I think we should go back to our home in Yaowopu first."
"Alright, Sister-in-law Li, you've all worked so hard these past two days. If anything comes up, I'll send a car to find you. I'll give you a ride for now," Captain Qi said politely.
At the three-way intersection a few kilometers away, the Hakka woman got off the bus; they weren't far from Yaowopu village.
The car drove away and gradually disappeared into the darkness.
“Master, I’m not sleepy,” Shen Cai said, sounding quite energetic.
"We're not going back. Master hasn't figured out some things yet, which is very important for dealing with that Li Dihuo brother-in-law in Hedong," the Hakka nanny said with a sneer.
Meanwhile, on the banks of the Yitong River, under the cold moonlight, a gaunt old man, lying on all fours like a ghost, was hopping and skipping rapidly toward "Yan Erbizi" bend...
At dawn in late spring, a chilly wind swept along the Yitong River. Five or six guards sat around a bonfire in the open space outside the house, keeping warm. A tin bucket filled with water sat on the fire, and several ears of dried corn, roasted black and fragrant, stood beside it. Someone took out a bottle of sorghum liquor, and the group took turns drinking a few sips to warm themselves.
"Hey, you guys say the county's bonuses are either a little more or a little less, how come it's exactly 250 yuan? Isn't that just '250'?" a guard muttered.
"Don't give me too little, or I'd rather be a fool," another guard chuckled.
“Yeah, who cares, as long as there’s something to take…” the other guards chimed in.
"Did you hear something?" the man who had spoken earlier asked suddenly, his ears sharp.
"No, it's probably some 'insect person' talking in their sleep," someone replied dismissively.
So everyone continued to break off the fragrant corn kernels, pop them into their mouths and crunch them, while taking a small sip of sorghum liquor.
Just then, a long, milky-white neck connected to a bald head emerged from behind everyone, peering out from behind the fire. Its triangular eyes, with blood-red sclera, stared at the head, looking left and right...
"Oh my god!" A guard suddenly saw it, was so frightened that he screamed and fainted.
The other guards turned pale instantly, trembling all over, and didn't even have the courage to draw their guns.
Li Dihuo, with his bald head, grinned, revealing a bunch of big yellow teeth. He then opened his blood-red maw and sprayed out a cloud of viscous fluid from the female reproductive organs hidden in his neck, which emitted a strong body odor.
The guards collapsed and fainted from the poisoning.