..."
Xu Qingzhu leaned against the car and hummed along softly.
Liang Shi suddenly spoke up: "This is a song that Qi Jiao and Chen Mian really like."
“I like it too.” Xu Qingzhu turned her gaze to the side, and could see the noise outside by following Liang Shi’s profile.
The whole city was immersed in excitement, with fireworks bursting in the sky.
Liang Shi said, "I fell in love with it after listening to it once."
Just as the song was coming to an end, Xu Qingzhu suddenly asked, "Liang Shi, are you lonely?"
Liang Shi was taken aback: "Huh?"
"Stop playing dumb," Xu Qingzhu said. "Do you think you'd want to find your family? Like Gu Xingyue finding her mother, like me reuniting with my mom. Actually, I think you were right to comfort me back then. We're not at the age where we need our parents anymore. We can choose not to have them and still have a wonderful life. But at times like this, I often feel that you're lonely."
Liang Shi: "..."
You might have this feeling at a certain moment.
Even surrounded by crowds, nowhere feels like home.
Things are a little better now; we still know that Xu Qingzhu exists and that they have their own little family.
This feeling was especially pronounced when she was separated from Xu Qingzhu. She went to Zhao Xuning's place, and occasionally, when she couldn't sleep at night and looked out at the lights of thousands of homes, she would have some unrealistic fantasies.
In this vast city, is there a single light that is lit just for her?
Someone is waiting for her to come home.
No matter how old she is, people will always treat her like a child.
This kind of emotion is actually very needed after it is lacking in childhood, but people often hide this need, as if revealing even a little bit would be a sign of vulnerability.
As time goes by, this longing will be buried deeper and deeper.
Yes, this kind of emotion isn't necessary at their age, but it's definitely a bonus if they have it.
Xu Qingzhu leaned against the wall and said, "Before today, I didn't have such deep feelings. I would have thought it was insignificant. But thinking about it carefully today, I feel like I've gained a kind of strength over the past six months. I know that I have people to protect, and people are protecting me. Like... my mother. I know that if there is anyone in this world who would give unconditionally for me, she would be the first one."
As Xu Qingzhu spoke, tears welled up in her eyes, and her voice choked with emotion: "You see, I haven't really had a proper relationship with her, but she gives me this kind of confidence, which is very important to me. I feel like I'm not afraid of anything. Even if... I mean, what if, even if one day our relationship really comes to an end, I won't feel like my life is meaningless, because they are also one of the reasons for my existence."
Liang Shi's hands were trembling as he gripped the steering wheel.
The car arrived downstairs just then, but no one moved, and the lights inside the car remained on.
Xu Qingzhu looked at her and said, "I was thinking, if only someone could give you this kind of confidence, if only someone could love you like this, it would be great. It's not just me who loves you, it's not just me who gives you this kind of confidence."
A tear suddenly fell from Liang Shi's eye.
She closed her eyes and opened them again, raising her hand to touch Xu Qingzhu's head: "Why are you so sad?"
Xu Qingzhu chuckled: "Actually, I'm afraid that if I'm gone one day, what will you do if you can't survive? So I want you to have more connections with other people, so that you can shine even without me."
Liang Shi: "..."
"What nonsense are you talking about?" Liang Shi pinched her cheek. "You're going to live with me until you're a hundred."
Xu Qingzhu unbuckled her seatbelt and nodded: "Okay."
As the two got out of the car, Liang Shi suddenly said, "Then I'll give it a try."
Xu Qingzhu smiled and nodded at her.
“What if she doesn’t want to acknowledge me?” Liang Shi asked. “Or what if she’s like Liang Xinran, who, despite receiving her parents’ love, is rejected by her siblings?”
Xu Qingzhu paused for a moment, then walked firmly to Liang Shi's side: "Please, you're my teacher Liang! Who wouldn't like you? Liang Xinran acted that way because she was restless and wanted too much. We don't want anything. Do we lack money?"
Liang Shi: "..."
It gave off a feeling of being rich and powerful.
Xu Qingzhu said, "We don't lack anything, and if they do, we can lend them some. But I have another selfish reason."
"What?" Liang Shi asked.
Xu Qingzhu held her hand and swayed it slightly in the air. "If we find them first, the initiative and choice will be in our hands. How can you be sure that your parents aren't looking for you? Rather than letting the unexpected come knocking, let's turn the unexpected into something we can expect."
Liang Shi: "..."
The scope has been broadened.
After a long silence, Liang Shi said, "I was left outside Shian Hospital in a near-death state."
Chapter 170
After Feng Xian finished speaking, Liang Shi also went to the An Hospital for a checkup.
But Shih-An Hospital was like an impenetrable fortress; more than twenty years later, they could find nothing.
Even Zhao Xuning couldn't find anything.
Liang Shi told Xu Qingzhu everything he knew.
Xu Qingzhu's guess was the same as hers.
However, Xu Qingzhu remained silent after expressing her conjecture. The two sat together on the sofa at home, with commercials still playing on the TV, and Zhao Ying's face appearing on the screen.
Nobody was in the mood to watch.
Liang Shi had already passed the initial surprise and was now quite calm.
She felt that even if the results showed yes or no, she could remain calm and composed.
After a while, Xu Qingzhu suddenly turned to her and asked, "So, are you scared?"
"What's there to be afraid of?" Liang Shi asked in return.
"I'm afraid I'm not good enough for the Shen family," Xu Qingzhu said firmly.
Liang Shi: "..."
It must be said that Xu Qingzhu has a knack for getting to the heart of the matter.
But Liang Shi had more than just this one emotion.
That was her initial thought, because the Shen family was too unattainable for her.
Even though she knew Gu Yixue and Zhao Xuning, and was a fairly good friend of both of them.
But she didn't feel that she was very close to the Shen family.
Later, she became somewhat sensitive, always feeling that these things should be sought by her parents, and that her behavior would be seen as having ulterior motives.
Unwilling to accept the consequences of recognizing relatives, and unwilling to change the status quo, they simply gave up.
Why bother?
Using these two words to persuade yourself is more effective than overthinking.
After careful consideration, Liang Shi slowly shook his head. "A little, but not all."
“I think my life is good enough right now,” Liang Shi said. “Actually, there are only two possible outcomes. I’ve thought about what might happen in either of them, but I think they would overturn my current life, so I’m not willing to go through with it.”
Xu Qingzhu nodded after thinking about it, but she was more of a pragmatist than Liang Shi.
"Whether it will be disruptive or not, we need to confirm that first," Xu Qingzhu said.
//
Confirmation is easier said than done.
With the New Year approaching, many things piled up, and everyone was extremely busy, so this matter was temporarily put aside.
After the New Year, Xu Qingzhu was busy for quite a while.
Liang Shi didn't rest either. With Chang Hui's help, she auditioned for two dramas and finally got the role of the second female lead in a period drama.
Immediately after the Lantern Festival, the filming of the travel variety show "Let's Go, Now" began.
The show started filming after the Lunar New Year, and it's said that they've already filmed three episodes, with Liang Shi appearing as a guest on episodes four, five, and six.
Meanwhile, "Heart's Journey" is scheduled to premiere on April 11.
"Let's Go Now" adopts a 4+3 format, with four fixed guests and three guest stars.
It will consist of twelve episodes and is expected to air in early March.
There are some behind-the-scenes photos of the show online, but very few.
The production team has kept it very private; we can only glean information from online sources. The regular MCs include a popular young actor, a cool and aloof movie star, an experienced host, and one whose information has not been revealed at all.
The popular young male idol is known for his bad temper, the aloof movie star is known for his easygoing personality, and the host is a veteran of various award ceremonies.
They can spark a connection at first glance.
Liang Shi also asked Chang Hui what he needed to be careful about.
Chang Hui thought for a while and told her, "One of them got the role by bringing her own investment. If you can build a good relationship with her, then do so. If not, then... don't mess with her."
Perhaps knowing that Liang Shi also had powerful backers, he didn't speak too harshly.
As for the person who parachuted in with her, Liang Shi didn't know who it was.
Chang Hui didn't tell her that since it was a reality show, it was all about the reactions based on the most direct feelings, and telling her beforehand would ruin the dramatic effect.
The reality shows here are similar to those Liang Shi participated in before, but they are more authentic.
More emphasis should be placed on the first two characters, rather than the last one.
In the past, when Liang Shi filmed reality shows, a single scene might have to be filmed seven or eight times.
She had also heard of celebrities who had filmed twenty or thirty times.
When reality shows lose their authenticity, they also lose their purity.
The audience knew it was all an act, so the ratings naturally couldn't be maintained.
Some netizens even joked that variety show personalities have much better acting skills than actors.
Therefore, the show will be broadcast after filming two episodes, mainly to allow time for post-production editing and subtitles. After that, it will basically be filmed and broadcast once a week, not exactly real-time, but close to that.
Later, we can adjust the recording method and invite guests based on audience feedback.