Due to a job transfer, the whole family moved. After my grandfather passed away, the family had not been able to gather together like this for many years. My younger cousins, who were still young in my memory, have now grown up. When they saw Chen Yunqi, they were not as affectionate as when they were children. They shyly accepted Chen Yunqi's red envelopes, and only after being urged by their parents did they awkwardly call out "Hello, brother." Then they quickly picked up their mobile phones or iPads and immersed themselves in the world of anime, smiling happily at the electronic screen.
Perhaps because their mother had given prior notice, all the elders acted as usual, showing no special treatment towards Chen Yunqi and San San. On the contrary, they tried their best to be kind and friendly, ensuring San San didn't feel uncomfortable or embarrassed. The more Grandma looked at the handsome and well-behaved San San, the more she liked him, and her initial doubts gradually dissipated. She pulled San San to sit on the sofa and asked him all sorts of questions, peeling an apple for him one moment and an orange segment the next. Chen Yunqi seized the opportunity to come closer, boasting about San San's usual frugality and hard work, bragging without batting an eye until San San blushed and wished he could disappear into the ground.
Grandma believed every word Chen Yunqi said without question. She praised San San with certainty while secretly feeling gratified. Chen Yunqi was her and her husband's most beloved grandson, whom they had raised single-handedly. During the years Chen Yunqi had been away from home, Grandma's heart had never been at peace. Even though she was in her eighties and knew that each child and grandchild has their own destiny, she could never truly let go of her worries. Now, seeing the life that had been lost and regained in this child, she felt gratified not only for Chen Yunqi but also for her late husband in the afterlife.
Weary birds return to their nests, wanderers return home, and drifting boats, having reached the shore, will set sail again after repairs and maintenance, laden with the love passed down through generations, heading towards the vast ocean.
Chen Yunqi slipped into the kitchen to thank his mother, but she slapped away his hand, which was trying to steal a piece of braised beef, with disgust. She said irritably, "What are you thanking me for? Just because I don't say anything doesn't mean the whole family has no objections. You should all keep it to yourselves."
Chen Yunqi hurriedly agreed while turning around to lift the steaming pot lid. Before he could even see what was inside through the steam, he was hit with a rolling pin by his mother.
"Go away, go away! It's not cooked yet! Don't lift it!"
Chen Yunqi rubbed the spot on his arm where he had been hit, savoring the smell he had just caught, and asked in surprise, "Was it steamed glutinous rice?"
“Yes,” Mom put down the rolling pin, wiped her hands with a tissue, picked up a little bit of the mixed dumpling filling with her chopsticks and brought it to Chen Yunqi’s mouth, asking him to taste it to see if it was salty enough.
"When your maternal grandmother heard that you were coming back, she bought glutinous rice half a month in advance to make glutinous rice cakes for you."
Upon hearing this, Chen Yunqi felt a lump in his throat and said guiltily, "San San and I will play in a bit, you guys rest."
Knowing that Chen Yunqi's sense of taste was unreliable, his mother also picked up some dumpling filling and put it in her mouth, smacked her lips and tasted it a few times. Then she picked up the salt shaker, added some salt to the bowl, and said while stirring, "If you don't hit him, who will? Do you think your grandma and I can hit him? Go wash your hands, it will be about 10 minutes later."
Chen Yunqi washed his hands and returned to the living room. He saw his cousin engrossed in a mobile game, his face beaming with excitement. Without a word, he dragged away his only audience member and, with San San in tow, sneaked a taste of all the prepared dishes while no one was in the kitchen. San San, not seeing a trash can, hid a small lamb chop bone in his hand, licking his lips as he asked, "Brother, when is dinner?"
"Almost done, it'll be ready once the glutinous rice cakes are pounded," Chen Yunqi said, glancing at the time. He turned off the fire on the stove, lifted the pot lid, and, just like his grandfather had done years ago, scooped out a ball of fragrant steamed glutinous rice along with the gauze underneath, placing it in another large pot.
Grandma found a wooden stick that was over a meter long and as thick as an arm and handed it to Chen Yunqi. Chen Yunqi washed both ends of the stick, then placed a pot of glutinous rice on the ground covered with newspaper, kicked over a small stool and said to San San, "Help me hold it steady, I'll hit it."
Grandma stood smiling to one side, watching San San sit on a small stool, bending over and holding onto the handles on both sides of the pot. Chen Yunqi then took a wooden stick and began pounding the clump of glutinous rice. What seemed like a simple task was actually quite arduous. Glutinous rice is extremely sticky; once the stick hits, it's tightly wrapped up, and pulling it out is quite difficult, requiring constant wetting. After pounding for a short while, sweat beaded on Chen Yunqi's forehead. He took off his coat and threw it aside, rolled up his sleeves, and used all his strength until the clump of glutinous rice was pounded into a dough-like consistency with no visible grains. Only then did he throw down the long stick and slump to the ground, complaining of exhaustion.
Grandma stepped over his outstretched legs, took the glutinous rice ball from San San's hand, and said with a smile, "San San has been bending over the whole time without complaining of being tired. He's so big, but he can't do anything all day long."
Chen Yunqi winked at San San and replied, "That's right, San San is much more capable than me."
Upon hearing this, San San quickly and embarrassedly explained, "No, no, it's always Brother Xiao Qi who takes care of me. He's very capable, he's the most capable..."
The more Chen Yunqi listened to this, the more awkward he felt. He quickly interrupted San San, helped him wash his hands, and sat down at the table to wait for dinner.
The dishes were served, and everyone was present. Chen Yunqi picked up a slice of sausage and put it in his mouth. After chewing a few times, he suddenly asked curiously, "What's this?"
"Did your friend from the mountains send this?" Grandma looked up and said, "We finished the previous batch, and another one was sent a few days ago. There was no name on it, so I thought it was sent by you again, wasn't it?"
Chen Yunqi and San San exchanged a glance and quickly realized that the sausage sender must have been San Niang. He savored the familiar taste in his mouth and said with tears in his eyes, "Yes, it's my sister from the mountains."
This was the first time in San San's life that he wasn't spending the Lunar New Year at his own home. He was afraid of breaking the family's traditions, so he ate his meal very cautiously. Little did he know that this family was even more cautious than him. Several adults took turns putting food into his bowl, and after putting it in, they would watch him swallow it, asking if it suited his taste and if he could eat it. San San didn't dare to be picky about food at this time, eating whatever was given to him, his cheeks puffed out like a cute little squirrel.
Chen Yunqi habitually picked up a piece of fish skin from his bowl and stuffed it into his own mouth, then said to the others with a smile, "Don't stare at him like that, he might not be able to eat anymore, what if he doesn't dare to come again?"
"Xiaoqi has really grown up, he knows how to take care of people now," Auntie said, turning her gaze away from San San and turning to Chen Yunqi. "How long are you staying this time?"
"Three days," Chen Yunqi said with a hint of regret. "The company is too busy. San San will be taking the college entrance exam next year, so she can't play for too long. She needs to go back and catch up on her studies. Tomorrow we'll go to sweep Grandpa's grave, the day after tomorrow I'll take San San out for a walk, and the day after that we'll leave."
The uncle raised his glass and clinked it with his aunt's husband's, but didn't drink immediately. "So busy, huh? You finally come back, but you can't even stay a few more days. Your grandma will miss you."
"As long as the earth doesn't explode, investment banks don't take holidays," Chen Yunqi joked with a smile. "Foreign companies don't celebrate the Spring Festival, and my boss only takes 7 days off."
San San picked up a piece of fish for his grandmother, who smiled at him with satisfaction and said, "It's good for young people to be busy. Work hard on your career, and I have to be willing to give it to you even if it's hard for you."
Chen Yunqi felt a little reluctant. After swallowing a mouthful of rice, he tentatively asked, "Grandma, how about you come live with me in S City from now on? Now that your uncle and aunt live far away, and my mom is busy, how can you manage on your own? San San and I can take care of you from now on."
Upon hearing this, San San immediately put down her chopsticks and puffed out her cheeks, nodding repeatedly in agreement.
“I’m not going,” Grandma shook her head and said, “There’s no place like home. I’m not used to those high-rise buildings you all live in. It’s too hot in S City. Here, the four seasons are distinct. My little courtyard is so nice, and I have neighbors. You can come back to visit me more often with San San when you have time.”
Chen Yunqi wanted to persuade her further, but his mother stopped him, saying, "Alright, your grandmother is old. If she doesn't want to go, then so be it. When people get old, they just want peace and quiet. You young people wouldn't understand. As long as you are doing well, we have no worries."
“Okay, we’ll come back for Chinese New Year from now on,” Chen Yunqi said, seeing San San’s head hanging low in dejection. Knowing that his homesickness had been stirred up again, he quickly changed the subject, “Are we setting off fireworks tonight?”
The mention of fireworks instantly perked up my cousins, who had been bored during the Spring Festival. However, they quickly realized that fireworks were just for kids, and they all became deflated, saying they would go to sleep after watching the Spring Festival Gala.
“They don’t allow setting them off anywhere now, except in the suburbs where they’re not so strict. Anyway, we bought them, so you can set them off if you want,” the uncle said, glaring at his daughter who was looking at her phone while eating. “We also bought firecrackers for opening the gate tomorrow morning, and they’re warming up on the radiator.”
After dinner, San San insisted on washing the dishes, but her grandmother wouldn't let her. Chen Yunqi pushed her back to the sofa and said with a smile, "You all rest, San San and I will wash them."
Outside, the sound of firecrackers filled the air. On this night of bidding farewell to the old year and welcoming the new, a peaceful atmosphere prevailed both inside and outside the house. The family sat together, watching television, chatting, and cracking sunflower seeds. Inside, the house was warm and cozy. San San and Chen Yunqi stood side by side in front of the sink, their tall and short shadows reflected in the frosted glass window. Their hands, immersed in the hot water, occasionally intertwined, sending tiny droplets of water splashing onto their young faces.
"San San, do you miss home?" Chen Yunqi asked casually as he wiped the dishes San San had washed with a cotton towel.
San San stared at the dishwashing brush in her hand and said honestly, "I wonder what my parents and Xiao Yan are doing. Has the village been connected to electricity yet? When I go to college, I will work part-time and buy them a big TV so they can watch the Spring Festival Gala too."
Just as Chen Yunqi was about to say a few more words of comfort, San San suddenly turned around, rested her forehead on his arm, and said almost inaudibly with her eyes downcast, "Brother... I have no home anymore... My mom and dad don't want me anymore... Brother..."
Chen Yunqi put down what he was holding, hugged San San, and took a few steps back, hiding behind the refrigerator. He lifted San San's chin and kissed his lips, saying, "Good boy, you have a home, and I am your home. My family is your family too. Don't be sad, everything will be alright."
“We won’t give up, okay?” Chen Yunqi wiped away the tears welling up in San San’s eyes with his thumb, looked at him with pity and said, “I understand, I understand everything. Wherever San San goes, he will be the pride of the mountains and the pride of the Yi people. We still have a lifetime to try to win their forgiveness. I will always be with you.”
Fireworks lit up the frost-covered sky in February. In the sleepless night, time seemed to rewind to a year ago. The night sky still held the dazzling fireworks, and beside him stood that captivating young man. Wearing a down jacket, San San was tackled by Chen Yunqi onto the thick snow in front of the house, sharing a long, passionate kiss. That kiss was as deep and fiery as their hearts. The boy's eyes were filled with moonlight and fireworks, snow and stars. His innocence deserved a lifetime of protection, and his courage was an inextinguishable mountain fire.
In the days since returning, Chen Yunqi has taken San San to explore every corner of the city. They shared a steaming hot roasted sweet potato on a cold street and glided hand in hand across a frozen river. Together, they looked through Chen Yunqi's childhood picture books and photo albums, rediscovering many beautiful memories.
Three days passed in the blink of an eye. After returning home from the holiday, San San buried himself in various mock exams and tutoring assignments. Thanks to the efforts of Tang Yutao and Chen Yunqi's mother, the household registration issue was successfully resolved, and the crumpled piece of paper was finally tucked into Chen Yunqi's household registration booklet. With a heart full of gratitude and determination, San San focused intently on his final semester of high school. As another summer arrived, he faced one of the most important days of his life.
On the day of the college entrance examination, Chen Yunqi was so nervous that he didn't sleep a wink all night. He got up before dawn to wash up and wandered around the room, endlessly checking the admission ticket and stationery in San San's schoolbag.
Despite the efforts of various government departments, the spontaneous organization of special buses by people from all walks of life to transport students to the exam, and the presence of traffic police clearing the way, Chen Yunqi was still worried about traffic. He planned ahead and asked a young woman in his department to buy him a bicycle seat on Taobao. As soon as the time came, he took San San to the exam venue.
San San patted Chen Yunqi on the back, comforting him all the way. When they arrived at the gate, if Chen Yunqi hadn't been wearing a shirt and trousers, the security guard would have thought that the person taking the college entrance exam wasn't San San, but this older student who was sweating from nervousness and had repeated a year of high school.
Just in time, San San waved to Chen Yunqi, slung his schoolbag over his shoulder, and turned to leave. Chen Yunqi stood there for a long time, then suddenly called out loudly to his retreating figure.
"Three three!"
"Huh?" San San stopped and turned around to look at Chen Yunqi, who had emerged from the crowd of parents.
The atmosphere was too serious, and I never had the courage to say "I love you."
"Go San San! I'm waiting for you here!"
In the morning breeze, San San, who had grown quite a bit taller, greeted the rising sun with a bright smile.
"Brother! I love you so much!"
Epilogue of Chapter 80
Chuanyang Station is a necessary stop on the train route from City C to Qinghe Town. The nearby Chuanyang Township has a long history of cherry cultivation and is famous for it. It has become an emerging tourist town in recent years.
There were many passengers transferring at Chuanyang Station, and the trains stopped there for a relatively long time. Chen Yunqi got off the train behind a group of tourists, stretched his body on the noisy platform, and then lit a cigarette.
The green train carriage was right in front of him, and there were many people coming and going around him. Chen Yunqi didn't dare to go far. From this position, he could clearly see the person sitting by the window in the carriage, who was San San, who was sleeping soundly with his schoolbag on the small table.
Chen Yunqi stared blankly at San San through the not-so-clean glass. The boy's handsome features had become more defined with age, his brows and eyes losing some of their immaturity and gaining more maturity, gradually revealing the composed charm of a young man.
If you do the math, San San will be 21 years old this year.
Local vendors on the platform were selling various cooked foods and local specialties to passengers getting off the train. Chen Yunqi stubbed out his cigarette and walked over, intending to buy some fruit for San San to eat on the way.
The fruit season was over in August. Chen Yunqi spent a long time picking and choosing in his cart, finally filling a small bag with locally grown cherries. After paying, he hurriedly returned to the train as the announcement of the train's imminent departure sounded.
San San seemed utterly exhausted, sleeping soundly with his backpack as a pillow, completely unaware of Chen Yunqi's brief departure. The train continued its bumpy journey for three hours, stopping and starting, until it was almost at Qinghe Town when San San woke up as if sensing something. He rubbed his eyes, looked out the window, turned, and bit into a cherry Chen Yunqi offered, asking casually, "Are we there yet? Did I snore?"
All told, it had been three years since San San left home. The closer he got to his homeland, the more uneasy and anxious he felt. Chen Yunqi removed the stems from the cherries and gestured for him to look at the empty carriage. He laughed and said, "You hit it, and you were so loud. Look, you drove everyone away."
San San scoffed at Chen Yunqi, indicating disbelief. She reached out, grabbed a cherry, and stuffed it into his mouth to shut him up, muttering, "It's so sour, you big idiot. You definitely didn't taste it before buying it."
Chen Yunqi's eyebrows furrowed from the sourness. He quickly swallowed it whole, pulled out a tissue to wrap up the spit-out pit, and stubbornly told San San, "I think it's fine. My little darling is too difficult to please."
Then he picked out a large one from the bag and asked, "Want another one? To whet your appetite, so you can eat more rice later."
San San pushed it away with disdain, saying, "No, no, I can eat more without an appetizer."
That's true. San San's appetite has indeed increased, and he's not so picky about food anymore. He eats more than Chen Yunqi at every meal. Seeing his height and weight increasing rapidly, Chen Yunqi complains that he can't afford to feed him, but at the same time he keeps increasing his feeding, adding one height mark after another to the wall of the study with a great sense of accomplishment.
When we arrived in Qinghe Town, the sun had already set. There were still very few diners at Qinghe's restaurant. The few fish in the fish tank were still floating around listlessly. The only change was that a row of flamboyant LED lights had been added to the shop sign at the entrance, which couldn't wait to flash colorful lights before dark.
The proprietress remembered Chen Yunqi and was very enthusiastic when she saw him again. No wonder, in this remote, impoverished place, handsome and cultured men were a rare sight all year round. Under her warm hospitality, San San ate a whole bowl of rice with fish soup and drank a beer, finally managing to suppress his nervousness.
After dinner, they went to a small hotel in the town center. The room they had stayed in years ago was exactly the same, and hot water was still scarce. Chen Yunqi and San San pushed the two single beds together and snuggled up at the head of the bed, reminiscing about every moment when their hearts fluttered. One of them stubbornly refused to admit that he had fallen for her first, while the other pretended not to remember and remained oblivious.
"Baby, when exactly did you start liking me?" Chen Yunqi asked, holding San San in his arms, his fingers lightly twirling San San's hair as he gazed at the moonlight outside the window.
San San leaned against his chest, smelling the unchanging faint tobacco scent on him, and said, "Hmm...you go first, and I'll tell you once you tell me."
"Me?" Chen Yunqi seemed to remember something and couldn't help but laugh. "It was probably when I first saw you, but I never really realized it."
"Really?" Upon hearing this, San San immediately sat up, turned to face him incredulously, and asked, "So early? Why?"
Having been together for so long, this was the first time they had seriously discussed this topic. Chen Yunqi frowned, poked San San's forehead with a finger, and said, "If you like someone, you like them. There's no need for so many whys."
San San grabbed his finger and put it in her mouth, gently biting it: "There must be, tell me... I want to hear it."
Feeling his fingertips damp, warm, and itchy, Chen Yunqi suddenly said a little shyly, "Well...it's because our San San is so good. She carried my luggage, held my hand while we climbed the mountain, made my bed, and even roasted sweet potatoes for me. She's so capable and considerate, of course I like her..."
San San couldn't help but laugh at his high-sounding reasons. She rolled over and sat on his lap, propping herself up on the headboard with her hands, and leaned closer as she asked, "Is that all?"
They were so close, so close that they could hear each other's breathing and heartbeats clearly. Chen Yunqi realized that he seemed to be in a passive position, so he tensed his facial muscles and casually hummed in agreement.
"Oh...so...brother...don't think I'm pretty..." San San pretended to be disappointed, but with one hand she pulled the hem of Chen Yunqi's shirt out of his pants and stroked it up his chest along his waist.
Chen Yunqi fell silent, just staring at San San, his heart pounding with pain.
"I thought... I looked like the kind of person my brother liked... The first time he saw me, he wanted to kiss me... and hug me..."
"Why aren't you saying anything..." San San sucked on the light-colored mole on his earlobe, reached down, and asked indistinctly, "Brother, why are you hard? Do you want it? I'll give it to you if you admit it..."
Unable to bear it any longer, really unable to bear it, Teacher Chen is still Teacher Chen, but the little lamb has cultivated into a powerful fox demon.
Faced with the overwhelming onslaught, Chen Yunqi immediately abandoned futile resistance and helplessly confessed, "I admit...I admit...You're beautiful...So beautiful...I was captivated the moment I saw you...I'm bewitched...You're so gorgeous..."
San San was finally satisfied and slid down in front of him. Chen Yunqi gently tugged at the hair on his head, tilted his head back, and kept murmuring and sighing, unable to say anything other than "You're so beautiful" and "You're so pretty".
There was no air conditioning in the room, only a clumsy fan standing in the corner. The fan blades made a broken sound, blowing back and forth with great effort, but all in vain.
It's so hot, so incredibly hot. Even if you don't move, you're drenched in sweat.
It was exhilarating, but also heartbreaking. From the moment he embarked on his journey home, San San kept doing seemingly unrelated yet unusual things, deliberately concealing his inner turmoil and panic. Chen Yunqi poured a glass of water and returned to the bedside, coaxing the flushed San San to rinse his mouth. He lay down and pulled him into his arms again, gently asking, "San San, are you scared?"
After the initial excitement, a deep-seated panic filled her heart—a wound that time could not erase. The resolve she had made before setting off crumbled instantly. San San could no longer hold back, and with her head down, she whispered, "I'm scared...so scared...I'm terrified...maybe we should just go..."
“Okay, whatever you say,” Chen Yunqi hugged him tightly and comforted him, “Don’t be afraid. If you don’t want to go, we can go home and talk about it when you’re ready. You can go whenever you want. I’m here, I’ll be with you.”
"Sweetie, go to sleep now."
San San didn't sleep well all night. Back in the summer after he was accepted into university, he had wanted to come home to show his parents his acceptance letter and try to win their forgiveness again. But Chen Yunqi was too busy that summer; frequent business trips made him miss San San's opening ceremony. He kept putting it off, and three years passed in the blink of an eye. When he saw Chen Yunqi's mother pulling out a few gray hairs in front of the mirror, San San finally made up his mind to come home.