Ne touchez pas à mon homme

Chapitre 24

Because of its proximity to the kiln, Uncle Cangke's room was very warm. Dad and Uncle Chonghua made dinner with longevity peach-shaped steamed buns and local side dishes brought back from relatives' homes. Although it was simple, they still set aside a portion for the host out of politeness. Since I didn't want to stay with Bingqi, I volunteered to take dinner to Uncle Cangke's workshop where he was tending the kiln.

Even outside the workshop, I could hear Uncle Cangke singing a strange song non-stop. It was probably a potter's work song. It seemed he was used to singing it, because even when I greeted him and brought him dinner, he was still humming softly.

"You're too kind. Please thank your family for me. But I've already had dinner..." Uncle Cangke said, taking the food and adding, "Also, don't call me uncle, just call me Cangke." (Look at me...)

"You're still not leaving?" Cang Ke squatted down and stroked my hair. "You're... the one called Firewing, right? Is there anything else?"

"Does Cangke live alone in a place like this?" I deliberately made small talk, not wanting to reveal that I didn't want to be with Bingqi.

"What's wrong?"

"Are these really porcelain kilns? They look like graves..."

“That’s right, that’s a burial mound.” Cang Ke chuckled lightly, vigorously ruffled my hair, and stood up. Because his tone was so nonchalant, I wasn’t surprised by his answer at first. But after thinking about it carefully, I felt something was off: “So… both Baize Village and Cang Ke’s home are on a burial mound?”

Cang Ke probably thought I was scared: "It's nothing. The people sleeping in the graves are all people I used to know, some of whom might even be people I really liked. Thinking about that, there's nothing to be afraid of."

"Then Cang Ke will see them often!"

Cang Ke didn't answer me, but turned around to observe the kiln fire: "Aren't your family worried if you don't go over?"

Even a child could understand the veiled message in those words, but I wasn't about to go to Icefin's place like that. So I desperately tried to make conversation: "If Cang Ke really, really wants to see them, he definitely will!"

Cang Ke's back froze. He scratched the back of his head and turned around with a wry smile: "This is troublesome... They don't want to see me at all..."

"No! Even Xiao Huang often wants me to see him!" Seeing that Cang Ke was no longer trying to send me away, I quickly tried to comfort him, but my eyes welled up with tears as soon as I mentioned Xiao Huang. "But I'm afraid that when I go back, Xiao Huang won't be there anymore, because it was already so faint..."

"Little Huang?" Cang Ke wiped his hands, dragged a stool over, and sat down in front of me.

I couldn't hold back anymore and immediately burst into tears: "It's all Bingqi's fault. He said that since we already have a cat, we absolutely can't have a dog, so I had to hide Xiaohuang in the alley between my house and the neighbor's. Xiaohuang is so pitiful because it can't see and is very thin. Its owner said it wouldn't live much longer and would abandon it, even its mother doesn't want it! In such cold weather, and with the rain, Xiaohuang could only stay in its tattered quilt in its wooden plank bed..."

When Cang Ke saw me crying, he couldn't help but say, "Thank goodness... thank goodness you're here to take care of Little Yellow and make it a little nest..."

"Huh?" I looked up, my eyes wide with confusion. "I didn't make that. The little house was already finished when I got there!"

"Is that so?" Cang Ke suddenly laughed. I couldn't understand the overly complicated smile, so I became even more agitated. "But when Xiao Huang died, I cried so hard by his grave, while Bing Qi didn't shed a single tear!"

"At least Icefin was there to help you bury Little Yellow!"

"No... when I arrived, Xiao Huang's grave was already finished..." I shook my head vigorously.

In an instant, Cang Ke's smile flickered like the shadows of a kiln fire, and softly, he hummed that strange lullaby again. During a pause in the song, he casually said, "Firewing, have you ever thought about it—who built Little Yellow's nest, and who buried it?"

No one noticed that the short alley was my and Icefin's secret hideout... Could it be that Icefin made both our little nest and our grave for Little Yellow? Then why did he always say that Little Yellow was dirty and smelly and absolutely forbid me from keeping it? Why did he say when Little Yellow died that it was never going to live long anyway and that it wasn't worth being sad for it?

Seeing my puzzled expression, Cang Ke ruffled my hair forcefully: "I didn't want to get involved in your stuff... Firewing, wipe your tears, I'll teach you this song!"

Why should I learn the potter's ballad? Just as I was about to refuse, Cang Ke's expression suddenly turned serious: "Do you know? There are greedy 'guys' living in Baize Village. If they see something exactly the same, they will definitely take one of them... They will definitely not let go of this good opportunity today, so... you must learn this song!"

What does that have to do with us? I didn't understand what Cang Ke meant, and just wanted to avoid learning: "I can't sing, Icefin..."

“Icefin won’t do,” Cang Ke said decisively. “Although that child seems a bit better, you can tell from the name that it won’t work, because it’s a ‘shrine maiden’s’ song…”

Seeing his persistence, I could only reluctantly try to learn. I only understood the lyrics, such as "the ceremony" and "spring orchids and autumn chrysanthemums," and had to memorize the rest. Fortunately, the song was short, only five lines. Cang Ke didn't explain the meaning of the song in detail, only saying that it was a song passed down from ancient times in Baize Village, sung to those greedy fellows. In the past, every winter and during the Ghost Festival, these fellows would come asking for things. At this time, the witches would set up a feast, beat drums, dance with all kinds of herbs, and sing this song to entertain them, and those fellows would go home happy. But now, only Cang Ke could sing this song.

Then I finally realized something was wrong: "This is a shrine maiden's song, but Cang Ke isn't a girl!"

Cang Ke couldn't help but laugh: "Of course, real girls can't participate in religious matters. In ancient times, witches were all played by boys!"

I panicked as soon as I heard that: although people often make mistakes, Icefin, who is a month younger, is my cousin, and the real girl... is me!

“But I…” I was about to explain when I was interrupted by a shout from the doorway: “Firewing, how long are you going to stay here? If you don’t go over soon, Uncle Konghua will get angry!” I saw Icefin leaning against the door frame, staring fiercely at Cangke, but not coming in.

It's too late to explain now, so I hurriedly bowed and ran towards the door, but Cang Ke stopped me. With that unfathomable, lazy smile, he pointed to the dinner I had brought: "Put this at the front door for me, Firewing!"

How strange... Even if you're not hungry, why leave dinner outside? I carried the side dishes and longevity peach-shaped steamed buns towards the door, puzzled. Ice Fin followed silently behind me. The moonless night sky outside resembled a vast, deep blue sheet of ice. The undulating graves seemed to stretch endlessly into the distance, and a wisp of white mist drifted across the desolate riverbank...

In the blink of an eye, the white mist that appeared out of nowhere spread out, as if drawn by something, surging over the numerous graves and drifting towards the kiln house where we were! As we drew closer, the mist gradually thickened, but it was a thickening without any dampness; it was more like an opaque plume of white smoke than mist...

"...Walking through the ghost fog?" I suddenly remembered what the long-distance bus driver had said: in the dead of winter, walking through the ghost fog can happen in the blink of an eye!

But... was that really smoke? The closer they got, the clearer it became—some were missing limbs, some were headless, and some had all four limbs but no torso: they were clustered together, smoky, fragmented human figures! These incomplete forms still maintained an upright posture, swaying and twisting, winding their way from afar...

"Is this... the ancestor who came back riding the fog?" I could barely hold my dinner. Icefin snatched the bowl and plate and put them on the ground. In his haste, he even broke the rim of the bowl containing the longevity peach buns. He pushed me into the house and slammed the door shut.

"What ancestors! This must be the thing that scared the villagers so much that they dared not let us stay overnight!" Icefin gritted its teeth and stared at me. "I told you we couldn't stay here, it's all your fault! Because you can't hear me! I heard their voices as soon as we entered Bai Ze Village. They kept saying that one of the two identical things should belong to them!" Cang Ke had said something similar, so Icefin probably wasn't lying, because although he couldn't see as clearly as I could, he could hear voices that I couldn't!

But I still disagreed: "Two identical things...we don't have anything like that, do we?"

"Firewing, you big idiot!" Icefin was so angry her voice was almost crying. "That refers to the twins, Dad and Uncle Konghua, those twins!"

Could it be that Cang Ke insisted I learn that song that would send these guys back because he already knew they would come, knew they were going to take away one of the twins, Dad and Uncle Chonghua! Then Bingqi's refusal to stay overnight at the kiln wasn't just being willful; the truly willful one was me. I should have noticed something was wrong long ago, but I deliberately ignored it—I clearly heard the strange clicking sound from Cang Ke when I bumped into him, and I clearly knew Cang Ke was someone who couldn't even tell I was a girl…

"Aren't you two coming in? It's cold outside!" Uncle Chonghua's voice called to us from inside. Bingqi and I hurried back inside, where we saw Dad and the others happily chatting and cleaning up the dishes. But, didn't Uncle Chonghua, who was so close to Dad, see—thin black streaks had appeared on Dad's face and hands; the black lines crawling across his skin kept increasing, just like… the cracks on broken antique porcelain…

After finishing his work, Uncle Chonghua, overflowing with curiosity, grabbed his coat and headed towards the front door: "Big brother, I'm going to check out the Cangke kiln, it's quite interesting!" We couldn't let him go out; Bingqi had just bolted the door, and if we opened it, the Ghost Mist would come in! Bingqi and I quickly grabbed his sleeves tightly: "No, no!" We absolutely couldn't let those guys in, because Dad might be the one they wanted to take away!

"I understand what you're thinking! Alright, I'll take you with me!" Uncle Chonghua waved his hand without any sign of tension and walked towards the entrance, completely ignoring our attempts to stop him, and casually opened the door. But as soon as he glanced outside, he suddenly collapsed...

The door was wide open, but the ghostly mist didn't rush into the house as we expected. Coming to our senses, Icefin and I rushed to the door, only to find that the semi-liquid white mist had vanished. Under the azure night sky, an exaggeratedly long table laden with a lavish feast stretched into the distance, with countless mutilated human figures sitting around it, feasting and drinking merrily...

"It looks like there's a fire somewhere, it's so warm!" One guy's ear seemed to melt as it slowly slid down his cheek.

"The food is good, but the tableware is so cheap!" a man without a left shoulder, his left arm hanging limply, grumbled. A man next to him, with a piece of his head missing, immediately chimed in, "Exactly! Look at this broken bowl! At least we're not afraid of cutting our lips!"

This banquet... could it be the side dishes and longevity peach buns that Cang Ke asked me to leave at the door that turned into this...? Because every bowl on the table has a chip on the rim, exactly the same as the bowl that Icefin broke that held the longevity peach buns!

"That's how these guys are. As long as they get a little bit of food, they'll forget their real purpose. They'll eat and drink here until dawn, and then leave empty-handed." Accompanied by a familiar voice, Cang Ke slowly walked out from among the guys.

Cang Ke was indeed helping us! "So that's why I left dinner at the door!" I said, about to go to greet him, but Bing Qi stepped in front of the door, quietly watching Cang Ke: "You were just watching the kiln, why are you coming back from outside now?"

"I just went out for some fresh air!" Cang Ke said with a nonchalant smile. "Yeah, it's so hot next to the kiln, who could stand being there all the time!"

But Icefin remained unmoved: "Then why don't you go back to check on the kiln? What are you doing here?" Icefin is being incredibly rude! We are merely guests staying here; Cangke is the master! We can't stop him from going anywhere in his own home!

Fortunately, Cang Ke didn't mind Bingqi's rudeness: "I have something here, come and get it."

Icefin still wouldn't move aside, and said, word by word, "There's one more thing—it wasn't there just now, so why is there a clicking sound when you walk and talk now?" A clicking sound? I didn't hear anything!

In an instant, Cang Ke's eyes widened. He scratched the back of his head and laughed sheepishly, "This is really troublesome. You still found out... That's because Cang Ke wasn't broken, but I was..." With the help of the light in the room, I slowly saw his face clearly. It was indeed Cang Ke's face, but this face was covered with the same fine black cracks as my father's body at this moment!

"I'm so sorry, I should have been called Cang Ke, but I don't even have a name now, so I can't introduce myself. But I'm different from those greedy fellows who only want food and drink; I'm here to collect my offerings!" The man, with a gentle smile that was slightly dull like Cang Ke's, slowly approached Uncle Chonghua, who was slumped by the door. He lifted Uncle Chonghua's head, examined him carefully for a moment, and then dismissively tossed him aside: "No markings on him, this one's useless. Where's the other one? I'm taking him with me, because this world doesn't need identical things!"

No wonder that old man who everyone calls his Third Uncle said we were trouble. Everyone in Baize Village didn't want to mess with us, because they were afraid of attracting this Cangke No. 2 and causing a disappearance in their own homes!

I took a step back and stood in the doorway with Icefin: "There's no food for you here! Don't come any closer!"

"Firewing, who are you talking to so loudly?" came the father's voice from the inner room. Cangke No. 2 clicked his tongue dismissively: "It's not good for children to lie! He's clearly inside; he has my mark on him, he can't hide!"

"Why won't you answer me, Chonghua? What are you doing out there with Firewing and Icefin?" Footsteps sounded from inside the door. At this critical moment, Dad actually came out on his own!

"Oh no!" Icefin turned around to stop her father, but at that moment, the door slammed shut behind them as if pushed by an invisible hand, followed by the sound of the latch being fastened. "Huh? What's going on with this door? Who bolted it? Why can't we open it?" her father said anxiously, shaking the latch.

Cangke No. 2 stopped, lowered its head, and chuckled somewhat forlornly, "...Are you trying to stop me again, Cangke? You've clearly won against me in every way..." Where was Cangke? Icefin and I looked around, exchanging bewildered glances. However, Cangke No. 2 quickly regained its composure, uttering the same catchphrase as Cangke: "What a headache! This only makes me crave my offerings even more!"

We're the ones who's really having a headache! We absolutely can't hand over our so-called support to him; that's our important family! But Cangke No. 2 is determined to get Daddy, unlike the other guys who are content with just having wine to drink. How can we satisfy him?

How can we stop him and make him give up his obsession with taking one of the identical items?

—That's an ancient song passed down from Baize Village, sung for those greedy fools…

—In the past, around the time of the Great Winter and the Ghost Festival, these fellows would come asking for things. At this time, the shamans would set out a feast, beat drums, dance with various herbs, and sing songs to entertain them. Once they were happy, those fellows would go home…

So...you have to learn this song!

Oh, right, Cang Ke taught me that song! That song can replace offerings and please those guys!

"I will support you!" I shouted, and without thinking, I began to sing the ballad of the Cangke Sect...

But... I can't make a sound! Although I can speak, once I start singing this song, even if I use all my strength, no sound comes out of my throat...

"Why? Why can't I sing?" I lowered my head in a panic and muttered to myself.

"So Cangke even taught you that song..." Cangke No. 2 looked at me disdainfully from above. "I originally thought that I might have to force my way in when I encountered the shrine maiden, but... it seems that Cangke miscalculated! So you're a girl, huh? People with heavy yin energy like us can't sing 'Li Hun'!"

In ancient times, female priestesses were all played by boys, and real girls were not allowed to participate in divine affairs. So that's what Cang Ke meant!

Cangke No. 2 laughed smugly, walking past me without a care in the world, and gently pressed his hand against the tightly closed door. A faint blue light appeared in Cangke No. 2's palm, and the door seemed to respond to this light, bursting forth with a series of pale, fine electric currents. Cangke No. 2 stroked his hand, which had been bounced back, and clicked his tongue softly: "Troublesome, Cangke... just stop interfering with me!" He forcefully raised his hand, and the blue light in his palm suddenly expanded!

However, Cangke No. 2's hand couldn't be swung smoothly, because Ice Fin had arrived at some point and was practically hanging on his arm! "You want to stop me too? What can a little girl do!" The person's hand showed no sign of stopping. Suddenly, the blue light rippled out without warning, thinning like ink mixed with water, diluted by the invisible night air, and disappearing into the sky—I heard it, a familiar melody! Cangke No. 2 lowered his head in disbelief: "It's a priestess... How... there can be a priestess?"

It's Icefin! Icefin is singing the song that Cangke taught me! He's calmly and fluently chanting those strange lyrics. Icefin must have already been outside the door when I was learning to sing it! He must have paid attention to Cangke's words and memorized this song that will please those guys!

A crisp crack suddenly rang out from Cangke No. 2's body, and the black cracks running across his skin became clear. He struggled to shake off the ice fins and barely managed to steady his swaying body: "You...you're the priestess? If I had known, I would never have let you get close!"

Cang Ke failed to recognize me as a girl, while someone with the same appearance as him made the same mistake!

Icefin repeated the ancient melody over and over, and in an instant, the porcelain kiln guarded by Cangke seemed to be opened, the kiln fire sweeping out, the warm flames, devoid of any violence, spreading out along the long table laden with food and drink. The people at the table became dazed, some yawning, others unable to maintain their posture, and with satisfied expressions, gradually merged into the warm flames…

The kiln fire surrounded the person with the same face as Cang Ke. Loud cracking sounds erupted from his body, as if he were being weathered. Along the black lines covering his body, his shell peeled off piece by piece, falling to the ground with a clattering sound.

"This is really frustrating. Two identical things, why does one of them have to disappear? And why is it that I'm the one who gets destroyed?" Cangke No. 2's gaze passed over me and Icefin, focusing on what was behind us. A broken smile gradually appeared on his face, which was no longer recognizable. "Sigh... I finally got this opportunity. I thought I could let the offerings stay here in my place. But why do you always have to get in my way..."

Icefin and I turned around. The door had opened sometime earlier, and Cang Ke stood behind us, surrounded by kiln fire, so we couldn't see his expression in the backlight. The moment we saw Cang Ke, like everyone else sitting at the long table, Cang Ke No. 2's body was melted by the flames, only his voice still echoing: "This is troublesome. I should hate you more, but why can't I..."

Through that large door, Cang Ke's body gradually faded, and from his lips, which had become as transparent as a shadow, came a complex tone that Bingqi and I couldn't understand: "I'm the one who's causing trouble. When will you realize that? I'm not hindering you... I'm waiting for you. How much longer... how much longer will you make me wait..."

Although I can't quite put my finger on what it is or why, I feel like they're exactly the same, Cang Ke and the other guy...

As the sun rose, the surprised chatter of the early risers in Baize Village woke us. They were amazed that we had spent the night in the abandoned kiln outside the village without any problems, but this only strengthened their resolve not to provoke us. Uncle Chonghua, not wanting to stay a moment longer, pulled us away from the village quickly. I secretly glanced back at the village bathed in the morning sun—Baize Village did indeed have many porcelain kilns, but they weren't scattered everywhere around houses or throughout the village, and their shapes didn't resemble burial mounds at all.

Cang Ke was right. The mounds I saw at night were indeed graves. In these unseen tombs, there must be someone he knew, someone he loved, someone he would wait for forever.

Seeing Icefin and me both glancing furtively at the Baize Village lagging behind us, we stuck out our tongues and grinned foolishly, spontaneously starting to sing the rhyme we'd learned from Cangke. Dad listened with squinted eyes for a while, then suddenly leaned closer in surprise: "The ceremony begins with drums, the dance continues. Beautiful women sing gracefully. Spring orchids and autumn chrysanthemums, may their love endure forever. You two, you can't be singing this, can you?" Although we didn't understand what he was saying, one thing was certain: even at this close range, we couldn't see those black lines that looked like cracks in porcelain anymore!

"What's the big deal! The melody of this song is awful, and the lyrics are so weird!" Uncle Chonghua, a pure science major, thought his father was making a fuss over nothing.

"That's 'The Ritual of the Soul'! It can be said to be the oldest requiem in China!" Dad pushed up his glasses. "Who taught you that? And you even sang it!"

"It must be because you forgot after you taught me, brother!" Uncle Chonghua said nonchalantly, "Just like what happened last night!"

"You don't remember anything either, do you?" Dad said anxiously. "What happened? How did we end up in that place?"

Icefin and I peeked at each other and made faces—we wouldn't tell anyone, and even if we did, Dad and Uncle Chonghua wouldn't believe us!

That happened many years ago. This fading memory was rekindled by news reports about Baize Village. Archaeologists had unearthed the remains of an official kiln there. I heard that the official kiln's practice was to fire many identical pieces for selection; out of about a hundred, only eight would be presented. This selection process was brutal, because in the end, the porcelain was indistinguishable in quality, yet only one would be chosen. The porcelain that failed the selection was simply smashed on the spot, sealed, and buried deep underground.

Bearing the fate of being destroyed at any moment, and cherishing the dream of becoming the only one left, these fragile and beautiful creatures endured the trials of fire. But their dream ended as soon as it began—not because they were not perfect, but because one had already been chosen. In this world, there is no need for identical things…

The entire village of Baize was built on the land where porcelain fragments were buried. No wonder I saw so many graves back then, no wonder there were so many human figures with missing limbs in the ghostly mist, no wonder they were so determined to obtain one of the identical items as an offering…

However, what puzzled the archaeologists was the discovery of a perfectly intact, deep blue-green porcelain vase at the site. Even without any decoration, its pure blue color and solitary posture instantly captivated everyone's attention. Local unofficial histories supposedly record that the official kiln declined because the finest porcelain vases produced there mysteriously disappeared en route to the capital, leading to the closure of the entire kiln and the punishment of all officials.

“I heard they found a fragment exactly like this porcelain bottle in the ruins, and they’re working hard to restore it!” I said, turning up the TV volume to drown out my whispers to Icefin and Icefin. “This bottle… it must be Cangke…”

"He actually gave up the chance to go to the capital and stayed." Icefin, sitting next to me, suddenly laughed: "That idiot, it's a wonder he waited until today..."

"This is a headache..." Icefin and I sighed in unison, but at the same time we frowned—when did we pick up Cangke's lazy and sluggish speaking habits!