I glared at him, seeing that even with Black Widow around, he still had designs on Baozi. Then I told Li Shishi, "Prioritize investigating Zhang Bing's background." Li Shishi took note.
Baozi asked Xiang Yu, "How old are you?"
"You're 30 already, so what?"
Baozi smacked his lips and said, "Men approaching thirty are reliable, but girls still in school definitely yearn for romantic love. They generally don't like men who are too much older than themselves." I saw Liu Bang lean close to Qin Shi Huang's ear and say, "When I was 40, I took a 14-year-old concubine." Qin Shi Huang whispered, "I also have two 13-year-olds."
Baozi said, "On another note, why do you love her so much? Is it love at first sight? Don't tell me she looks a lot like your ex-girlfriend, I don't listen to that nonsense."
We all stared at her with murderous eyes, saying nothing, and munching on our popsicles: crunch, crunch.
Baozi continued in a carefree manner, "Also, shave your beard, listen to Jay Chou more often, learn some internet slang. It's okay to be older, just don't let people feel like there's a generation gap between you and them."
We watched her bite into an ice pop: crunch, crunch.
Baozi: "Also, you need to find a job quickly. What will you say if the girl's parents ask you what you do? You can drive, right? Driving for someone can earn you a good amount of money in a month. Look at Xiao Wang next door, he delivers goods to the supermarket..."
We: Click, click.
After finishing his popsicle, Baozi threw the stick into the ashtray with a "piu" and said, "I'm going to cook."
After she left, I felt that Baozi's words made a lot of sense. At least Xiang Yu should dress up a bit. Right now, he's all unkempt and looks terrible.
I lowered my voice and said, "Now, the girl-chasing task force will begin assigning tasks..."
Li Shishi wrinkled her nose and said, "Who agreed to call this a 'girl-chasing operation'?"
I said seriously, "Comrade Li Shishi! At this critical juncture, please don't get entangled with me over such trivial matters."
"Tch." Li Shishi remained silent.
I gave her a forced smile and said, "Cousin, the first task requires you to personally investigate Zhang Bing's background. And it would be best if you could contact her directly and gain her trust."
Liu Bang nodded and said, "The army doesn't move until the intelligence is clear beforehand; Han Xin did the same thing."
"Bangzi, you need to help us with some peripheral matters. What kind of car does your Fengfeng drive?"
"I don't recognize it. She said it's not a good car."
What does the logo look like?
"I'll draw it for you." Liu Bang took Li Shishi's paper and pen and drew two vertical lines with a horizontal line in the middle, forming an "H". I asked, "Slanted or upright?"
"...It seems to be slanted, yet it also seems to be upright."
Duh, it's either Honda or Hyundai anyway, so it's not too bad.
I asked him, "Could I borrow it for a couple of days?"
Liu Bang said with difficulty, "As you know, I haven't known her for very long, and we're not very familiar with each other yet."
"Bullshit! You're not even that familiar with each other, yet you're helping each other move boxes?"
Although Xiang Yu didn't know what I wanted the chariot for, he knew I would be useful eventually, so he said to Liu Bang, "Consider it a favor I owe you."
Liu Bang sighed and said, "Alright, put it on me. After all, I owe you one."
I patted Qin Shi Huang on the shoulder: "Brother Ying, do you know how to use a digital camera?" It was a gift from Jin Shaoyan.
"It's morning meeting."
"Tomorrow, you go with Shishi to Zhang Bing's building and keep watch, take some photos and also take some pictures of the overall layout of their school. Kezi—you stay with Ying Ge and buy him food."
After I had everything arranged, I walked around in place for a couple of times, feeling quite pleased with myself. Suddenly, they all asked me at the same time, "So what are you going to do?"
"After dinner, I'll take Brother Yu to buy clothes." Tch, I knew they'd ask that. Ever since they moved in with me, look at them, one after another acting like emperors but not like emperors, heroes but not like heroes, always judging others by their own petty standards. It's true what they say, "One is influenced by one's company." Well, I should say a strong general has no weak soldiers.
Seeing their speechless expressions, I said smugly, "Comrades, this time we're pressed for time and have an urgent task, so we must work together with one heart and one mind. Don't be like some of the female comrades who fuss over trivial matters." I put my feet back on the chair and said in the tone of a landlord bully, "Otherwise, don't blame me, the group leader, for criticizing you."
Li Shishi called out with a smile, "Sister-in-law, my cousin is bullying me."
Baozi came out of the kitchen peeling scallions and saw me standing arrogantly on the stool. She pointed at the table with the scallions and said, "Are you going to climb any higher? Are you going to climb any higher!"
I said, not really paying attention, and Li Shishi continued, "My cousin insists on being the leader of the girl-chasing group, and he even said something like 'Today I repay society, tomorrow society will repay me,' I don't know what he means."
"I didn't say that, everyone can be my witness!"
Everyone was indifferent, eating their popsicles: crunch, crunch. Damn it, even Xiang Yu didn't help me; he'd clearly finished his popsicle but was still biting the stick: crunch, crunch. Baozi watched me with a smile…
Fortunately, I reacted quickly and enthusiastically took the lead in clapping and saying, "Welcome our group leader Baozi to say a few words to us."
Baozi is popular, and everyone applauded.
While peeling scallions, Baozi said, "If Da Ge really likes that girl, I don't mind if you guys give him some advice, but don't have any bad intentions. Especially with Qiangzi, you should selectively refer to his advice and report back to him without any choice. My cousin will be the deputy group leader from now on, so she'll help me keep an eye on them. Okay, I'm going to cook now."
Everyone applauded enthusiastically. I made a fierce face at Li Shishi, and she pretended to yell, so I quickly begged for mercy.
After the laughter and joking around, Xiang Yu wasn't so nervous anymore. I gestured for them to come closer and said, "After dinner, everyone except Ying Ge can start preparing today."
Chapter 81 Aladdin's Lamp
During the meal, Baozi called out to Qin Shihuang, "Fatty, you should pick up the snails with a toothpick and eat them, don't put them in your mouth and chew them."
I quickly said, "From now on, call me Brother Ying."
Qin Shi Huang laughed and said, "It's alright, it's alright." Then he picked at the food with a toothpick and said, "If you want the steamed bun, go to my place. I'll make an exception and grant you the title of King of Zheng."
I said, "I am now the King of Qi and the King of Wei. With Baozi, we have half the country. Aren't you afraid we will unite and rebel against you?"