Qin Xiaoan laughed arrogantly twice: "Third brother, I'll give you this girl's phone number for free to soothe your wounded heart. Go after girls, fall in love! You lost your computer, maybe you can find a relationship instead?"
Chen Xu cursed again, saying he wasn't as lewd as Chen Xu, when Wu Yuan chimed in, "Come on, girls like that aren't something we can handle. I overheard those beasts upstairs discussing our class's three top-tier girls. I bet it's going to be a bloodbath. You beast, actually I think that chubby girl in 303 would be perfect for you. Why don't you consider it?"
Qin Xiaoan retorted with a curse, then sighed along with him, "The boss is right, these girls are probably just fleeting clouds in the sky!"
Are they just fleeting clouds?
Chen Xu recalled that day in the library, where a girl with curly hair sat quietly, gently pointing at the milky white Apple computer in front of her with her slender fingers. Was she really just a fleeting cloud?
In the brief moment he was distracted, Qin Xiaoan had already sat down, stretched, and said, "Damn, I'm so tired! Helping my girlfriend move her things isn't easy." But since Chen Xu's bed was the closest to the door, Qin Xiaoan simply lay down on it!
This scared Chen Xu half to death, because there was a laptop under his blanket!
Chen Xu was thinking about how to get rid of Qin Xiao'an when the beast suddenly said, "Damn it, what's under your blanket, Third Brother? It's making me uncomfortable!" Before Chen Xu could react, he yanked off Qin Xiao'an's blanket.
Chen Xu was truly terrified. Without thinking twice, he rushed forward, but stopped halfway, because there was no laptop under the blanket, but a watch...
"Hey? Third brother, your watch is pretty nice. Where did you buy it?" Qin Xiaoan asked curiously, picking up the watch. Then, he consciously tried to put it on his wrist.
At this point, Chen Xu couldn't let him put it back on. He quickly snatched it away and shouted, "Damn it, Second Brother, can you stop rummaging through other people's things? Get out of the way!"
After shooing the bewildered Qin Xiao'an aside, Chen Xu secretly felt under his buttocks. There really was no computer! Where did the computer go? And where did this watch come from?
Shoved aside, Qin Xiaoan said dejectedly, "Damn it, third brother, don't be so stingy! Touching it won't break it. By the way, where did you buy that watch? It looks pretty!"
Chen Xu felt his mind was in complete chaos, so he could only say that his relative brought it back from abroad, and then he walked out and dashed into the bathroom.
"How could this be? How could this be?" Chen Xu sat on the toilet, staring blankly at the trendy watch. "Where did this thing come from? Where's my computer? Could this watch be a computer that turned into something else?"
This sudden thought startled Chen Xu: a computer that can transform?
"Xiaomin, Xiaomin, is that you?" Chen Xu whispered to his watch. Suddenly, a light shone on the watch's LCD screen, and a 3D virtual Xiaomin appeared in the light, smiling sweetly: "May I ask what can I do for you?"
Damn! Luckily, this restroom is enclosed. If it were one of those older buildings with public toilets where the stalls are blocked off with small wooden boards, Xiaomin suddenly popping out like a genie from Aladdin's lamp, flying so high she almost touched the ceiling, wouldn't she scare the animal pooping next door into falling into the latrine?!
"Shh! Keep your voice down!" Chen Xu quickly put his index finger to his lips and whispered, "Is this watch some kind of computer that's turned into something?!"
It has to be said that many technologies developed 80 years ago are very user-friendly. Xiaomin is actually just a program, but the program's judgment mechanism is very powerful. For example, when it sees the user make a "shh" gesture, it will automatically reduce the volume of its voice: "Yes, the Magic Box Generation 1 biocomputer has a transformation function. It can transform into a technological product of the same mass and within a certain size range, such as a watch, a camera, etc. This allows you to enjoy the services of other digital products while owning a computer."
Seriously? That's awesome?!
"Because computers are made using biological materials, the entire material can be automatically separated and recombined, thus transforming into various forms and more fully utilizing their corresponding functions. This convenience and speed have won the favor of consumers."
How could you not love it? Just think about it: a laptop costs eight thousand, a decent digital camera costs two thousand, and a camcorder costs three or four thousand… Now, the money you spend on a computer can buy you a computer, a camera, a camcorder, and even a mobile phone, and you can turn all those heavy, bulky things into a small watch to wear on your body! How convenient is that!
More importantly for Chen Xu, if this were the case, he could wear his computer like a watch when he went out without worrying about losing it.
"You can also use the computer functions while using the watch form, but some programs are a bit cumbersome to operate, while others are more convenient. For example, if you run the 'Health Doctor' program, it can detect your current physiological condition through your pulse. Would you like to run it?"
"There's such a benefit?" Chen Xu quickly said, "Let's run it and see."
A minute later, several lines of data appeared next to Xiaomin, such as pulse rate, heart rate, and internal organ function data. The conclusion was: "Your liver fire is currently a bit excessive, probably due to emotional excitement. I suggest you take a few deep breaths, maintain a good mood, exercise appropriately, and reduce stress. You can also use 12 grams of Prunella vulgaris, 10 grams of mulberry leaves, and 10 grams of chrysanthemum, soak them in water for half an hour, then boil them. You can also add an appropriate amount of rock sugar to taste before drinking."
Wow, that's amazing! Doesn't that mean you've found yourself a personal doctor?
"Your thinking is inappropriate. Although this program records tens of thousands of cases from both traditional Chinese and Western medicine, there may still be errors in the program's diagnosis, especially when taking a pulse. Traditional Chinese medicine has extremely strict requirements for pulse diagnosis, because although some symptoms may have similar pulse patterns, the medications can be vastly different. Taking the wrong medication could be dangerous. Therefore, some minor ailments can be treated according to the program's prompts, but serious illnesses still require careful diagnosis by an experienced doctor. If you experience any discomfort while using this program, please go to the hospital for examination immediately."
"No way?" Chen Xu was dumbfounded: "Could it be that there's a danger in using your medical examination program?"
"Theoretically, that's how it is, so users need to make their own decisions. The starting point for developing this program is everyone's health. However, because some symptoms are extremely complex, a definite result cannot be obtained through a superficial diagnosis, so it is necessary to go to the hospital for a professional examination. Of course, the above is just to remind everyone not to rely too much on this program to judge their health status, because the accuracy of this program is only 99%."
Ninety-nine percent, and that's all?
Chen Xu then realized that the above words were only in response to some unexpected situations. Just as even the best doctor can make a misdiagnosis, and a compass cannot work when it encounters a magnetic mountain, no one dares to say that the program they have created is 100% correct. This reminder is more of a humble statement than a reminder, so as not to make any overly confident statements.
"Could I use this function to treat other people?" Chen Xu thought that if he couldn't find a job in the future, he could open a small clinic with this watch and probably wouldn't starve... Doctors can make a lot of money!
"Of course you can."
"So, does that mean you'll appear in this 3D form every time I use the watch? Or can you not appear and not make a sound?"
"Of course, that's possible. You can choose the absolute silent mode, and I will display the diagnostic results in text on the watch's screen. Also, if you have certain privacy requirements, you can lock the watch, so that it's just a normal watch under normal circumstances, and it can only be unlocked when you enter two of the following: a password, voice message, or fingerprint information."
That's very thoughtful!
"In addition, due to the special structure of the biocomputer, it has extremely strong shock resistance. Moreover, due to the user's special requirements, the ultimate bearing capacity of this computer can withstand the pressure generated by the impact of a 6mm caliber handgun bullet. Therefore, you don't have to worry about the computer being damaged by impacts during your vigorous exercise. And even if there is some damage, the biocomputer can automatically repair itself."
What could Chen Xu say? He was now grinning foolishly, unable to open his mouth!
Chapter 5 Catching the Thief (Part 1)
"Boss, second brother, fourth brother, come here!" Chen Xu called out as he came out of the bathroom, "I know who stole our stuff!"
Upon hearing this, the expressions of the three men immediately turned ugly. The fourth brother, Dong Qingjie, who had been silent until now, rushed forward and cursed, "MLGBD, third brother, no, third brother, who is it? I'm going to beat him to death! I'm going to get my wallet back!"
The fourth brother's expression...did he lose a lot of money?
All three of them were incredibly puzzled. Then Chen Xu said, "There's a 99% chance the person who stole our things was that beast who came to our dorm to sell pens the other day!"
The other three lowered their heads and thought for a moment. Dong Qingjie exclaimed, "You mean the one who's short and has hair that looks like a pile of dung on his forehead?!"
"That's him!"
Upon hearing this, Wu Yuan and Qin Xiao'an also remembered. School started on September 1st, and they usually arrived two days early to register. Every evening for the past two days, people had come to sell things. Some were selling radios for 90 yuan each, others were selling year-long English newspapers, and still others were recruiting for clubs. Indeed, there was a guy selling pens, bringing a large bundle of ballpoint pens to sell, the kind that cost four yuan for ten. As a result, the eldest brother, tempted by the cheap price, bought ten, and now, after just a few casual writes, six of the pens are already unusable!
"Holy crap, it was that bastard?" Having been fooled once before, Wu Yuan slammed his hand on the table, then blew on his hand for a while before saying, "It's possible! I was on the phone when he came, and I had put my laptop away. And Lao San was playing on the computer! Lao San, how are you sure?"
"That's what I thought too!" Chen Xu organized his prepared lines: "At the time, you were on your cell phone, and the second brother's new shoes were lying on the bed. The fourth brother wasn't there, and I was playing on the computer. I think if he had seen that you also had a computer, he would have searched high and low and found your laptop. Damn, he can even pick locks on doors, let alone a cabinet. So the most likely scenario is that he didn't see yours, only mine, which is why he didn't search thoroughly!"
“That makes sense!” Wu Yuan added, “But the problem is, even if he took it, damn it, we have no evidence. We can’t just rely on guessing!”
"Evidence? The evidence is on these two cards!" Chen Xu pointed to Lao Dong's ID card and bank card lying on the table and explained his verified conjecture. The eight eyes of the three people listening lit up... The eldest brother was nearsighted and wore glasses.
"Damn it! Let's go to the police station!" Old Dong slammed his fist on the table, his voice filled with heroic spirit!
A group of people rushed to the police station next to the school. The policeman on duty happened to be the older brother who had come to the dormitory to find out what was going on. When he saw the four of them arrive at the same time, he was immediately amused and said, "Oh, you're here to give a statement?"
"Officer!" Dong Qingjie was the first to rush forward. "We know who the thief is!"
Seeing how fierce Old Dong was, the three kids who had been a bit timid when they entered the police station looked at him with admiration, thinking that Old Dong must have had a lot of money stolen from him!
There's a Chinese habit: ordinary people generally don't like to greet officials, especially high-ranking officials, unless they have something to say. Entering the police station was a first for them, even though they were there to report a crime, not to be arrested, the feeling was still strange. So the three men who had initially been energetic and boisterous now resembled docile lambs.
"Hey, don't call me uncle, I just graduated!" The policeman was quite polite, probably out of sympathy for the four kids in front of him. After all, they had just graduated from police academy, and he felt sorry for these four young men who had been robbed clean on their first day of school.
"Do you know who it is? Who is it?!"
"It's that guy who came to our dorm to sell pens last time!" Old Dong said indignantly, rattling off Chen Xu's speculation. Then he pulled out his ID card and bank card, which amused the policeman. The two cards were even inside a plastic bag.
"You've watched a lot of Conan, haven't you?" the police officer chuckled. "To be honest, there's nothing wrong with taking fingerprints, but let me be clear from the start, what if it wasn't him who did it?"
Old Dong immediately deflated and turned to look at Chen Xu. Chen Xu felt that Old Dong was all show and no substance, and that he had no choice but to step forward now. So, he mustered his courage and shouted, "We can be sure it was him!"
"That won't do!" The police officer, probably finding the group of young men amusing, said, "We've received orders from above to enforce the law civilly. Without sufficient evidence, I can't help you. It's not that I don't want to help you. Honestly, I'd be quite frustrated if this happened to me, but you can't just suspect someone and expect us to deploy police. Besides, most of the people selling things in the university dorms a few days before school starts are transients; where are we supposed to catch them?"
"And to be honest, although a lot of things were stolen from your school this time, and it's on our radar, there are just too many unsolved cases like this. Right now, the bureau is working on a cross-provincial robbery gang, and most of our police force has been diverted. Your case will probably be shelved for a long time."
These words were like a bucket of cold water poured over my head. The implication was that these were trivial matters that were too troublesome to investigate, and that we didn't have the manpower to handle them.
To be fair, this police officer was quite kind; he didn't throw around his authority, say anything nonsensical, and then just kick them out. But they clearly had their own difficulties, and the problem is knowing who the thief was but not being able to arrest them… that's even more frustrating than not knowing who the thief was at all!
Many people believe that police officers are meant to serve the people, but it turns out that the police system does indeed suffer from a shortage of manpower and resources. Seeing this officer trying to evade the issue with such an excuse, Chen Xu became somewhat annoyed. He said in a deep voice, "So you're saying our cases aren't big enough?"
The policeman was taken aback for a moment, then smiled good-naturedly and said, "Young man, some things don't go as planned."
Wu Yuan and Qin Xiao'an tugged at Chen Xu, signaling him to let it go. But Chen Xu was stubborn as a mule when he got angry, so he arrogantly slammed his hand on the table: "Damn it, we're reopening the case! This time we lost more than just an 8,000 yuan laptop and a 2,000 yuan phone; more importantly, the data on my computer... I have nuclear weapon blueprints on my computer!"
With a loud thud, everyone present, including the policeman, fell to the ground...
"Damn, you're really exaggerating!" After being chased out like chickens by the policeman, Wu Yuan and Xiao An gave Chen Xu a thumbs up: "Damn nuclear weapons design blueprints, how did you even come up with that!"
"Hey? What are you guys doing here?!" Just as the group was muttering and preparing to slink away, a familiar, loud voice rang out from not far away.
Chen Xu looked up and found that it was Wang Dong, the senior from before, accompanied by several classmates who all looked like veterans.
"Senior Wang Dong, what are you doing here?"
Wang Dong grinned and said, "There's a pretty good sauerkraut fish restaurant over there, not far from the school. So we ate here. Look, it's that place. But what are you guys doing here at the police station?"
Hearing this, a large bead of sweat appeared on everyone's foreheads. Although they had only met twice, Chen Xu had a good impression of Wang Dong and quickly said, "Senior, we know who stole our things!"
Wang Dong was taken aback: "Who is it?!"
"That's the guy who sells pens to our dorm!"
"He was short, with very thin hair that looked like a lump of poop stuck to his forehead."
"Ten for four dollars! The average lifespan of each MB pen is no more than five minutes!"
"Like a pile of poop?" Wang Dong frowned and thought for a moment, then asked the students next to him, "Do you guys remember it?"
“There was one,” a tall, thin classmate next to Wang Dong said after thinking for a moment, “I saw him last night when I went to their dorm to recruit new members for their club. I yelled at him and kicked him out. Damn it, his lousy pen only works when he first starts writing on the paper. It'll break down after a few words. How dare he try to fool people? He ended up dragging me out…”
"You guys had a one-on-one fight?"
"No, no!" The tall, thin guy rolled his eyes. "Damn, he handed me a cigarette and said he was a relative of Old Zhang, the dorm supervisor downstairs. I couldn't really say anything, I just told him to stop lying on the second floor and go to the first floor instead, and then he scurried away."
"Ugh..." Chen Xu asked, "Senior, why are we going to the first floor?"
The tall, thin man smiled smugly: "The second floor is all our students, we're on the same side. How could we just watch our juniors get fooled? The first floor is for the School of Mechanical and Electrical Engineering, it's none of my business!"
Everyone broke out in a cold sweat.
Wang Dong clenched his fist, his knuckles cracking. "Old Zhang's relative? Damn, Old Zhang's been a dorm supervisor for years. My senior from my freshman year said he'd been taken care of by him all along. How did he end up with such a damn relative? But since we've found the root of the problem, let's go, I'll take you to find Old Zhang! Once we find that kid, we'll raid his den. That son of a bitch, it's not just your dorm that's lost things, several other dorms have lost cell phones, MP3 players, and other stuff too. Go back and get a few people, we're going to find him!"
The four freshmen broke out in a cold sweat again. Why did this sound so much like a gangster seeking revenge?
"Hey, hey, hey! Wang Dong, what are you guys up to?" The policeman who had just been there saw the commotion outside and rushed out to see what was going on. He was surprised to find that he knew Wang Dong.
Wang Dong smiled, expertly took out a cigarette and handed it to him: "Brother Li, let's go help you solve the case!"
The police officer took the cigarette, but his face hardened. "I'm telling you, don't go overboard this time. Damn it, you've got violent tendencies. The other day, a thief stole a bicycle from your school, and you caught him and beat him up. By the time I got there, the kid was practically dead. We had to take him to the hospital, and they found out he had a mild concussion. Please, go easy on him, okay?"
Wang Dong chuckled: "I was doing it for the people!"
"You're kidding me!" the policeman laughed and cursed. "Be careful, these days thieves all go in gangs. Who knows how much trouble you'll get if you offend one. We may not have many organized crime groups in China, but we have plenty of local bullies. You're still a student, you have connections, don't let someone sneak up on you one day!"
Wang Dong laughed and joked with him, but the policeman said, "Forget it, I've eaten quite a few meals from you, so I'll go with you today, so you don't end up beating someone up to the hospital again! We have to solve this through legal means."
Zhang Xu, who was standing next to him, was surprised that Wang Dong had such a good relationship with this policeman. He was so impressed that he got Wang Dong to take action after just a few words. He asked dumbly, "Didn't they say that there weren't enough police officers and that we couldn't just send them out casually?"
"Damn it!" the policeman chuckled and cursed, "I'm involved in this in a private capacity, so it doesn't involve a shortage of police resources. Once you've confirmed that guy is a thief and caught him red-handed, I'll be deployed as a regular officer!"