Unlike the others, this side hall did not enshrine a Bodhisattva. Thick curtains hung in the three large rooms, and thick carpets covered the floor. A gentle voice from inside said, "You're going to dirty my carpet again."
The fat monk took two steps back and stood in the outer room, clasped his hands together and said, "Uncle-Master, I received an old item today that looks like yours."
The curtain was lifted, and a lean, tall man with a pale face, dressed in a gray monk's robe, stepped out and asked, "What old item?"
He noticed the hairpin in the fat monk's hand, picked it up with two fingers and examined it closely before asking, "Who sent it?"
The fat monk said, "It is General Du Yu from Liangzhou City."
Yu Yichen twisted the hairpin, noticing its mottled marks, and asked, "Who else?"
The fat monk said, "And his son."
Seeing that Yu Yichen was still staring at him, the fat monk said again, "He said his wife is waiting outside the temple."
Yu Yichen put away the hairpin and said, "Go and hold him off. Don't let him leave yet."
After saying this, he took off his boots, put on a pair of straw sandals, went out to get his staff, put on his bamboo hat, and went out through the back door. He walked along the outer edge of the road surrounded by tall white poplar trees. Not far away, he saw a slender and tall woman standing in a pavilion in the distance. He felt as if a heavy stone had hit his chest, and he almost fell to the ground.
She wore a dark green short jacket and a long purple gauze skirt, her hair neatly tied in a bun, adorned only with a single, glittering jade hairpin. She stood gracefully amidst the shimmering golden millet fields, gazing intently at the distant White Pagoda Temple.
He dared not disturb her, clutching the hairpin tightly as he stealthily approached the pavilion. After a distance of about ten feet, he dared not take another step closer. Standing in the chestnut field outside the main road like a scarecrow, he dared not move or blink, for fear that she would disappear in the blink of an eye.
She remained committed to her promise and refused to enter the temple with her husband.
He also held fast to his conviction, keeping an ancient Buddha and a long lamp not far from her.
She stood there for who knows how long, then perhaps a mischievous impulse arose within her. She leaped over the railing and plucked wildflowers growing in the chestnut field, turning them over and over in her hands. As she played with them, a smile appeared on her face, and he smiled too. A dozen feet away, he and the tall scarecrow stood silently. Her mind was elsewhere, and she did not look at him.
He noticed the shoes she was wearing, embroidered with two little green frogs, and a thought suddenly struck him. He had once bought her a pair of shoes like those, which his shopkeeper loved and always wore. So he bought her many, many more pairs, embroidered with little tigers, rabbits, dragonflies, and all sorts of other small animals.
She wove a hat with wildflowers, put it on her own head, looked around at herself by the ditch, and, seeing nothing, shook her head with a smile, took it off and held it in her arms, still gazing in the direction of the White Pagoda Temple.
She gazed at the white pagoda, and he gazed at her; though it was only a moment, or perhaps a long time, she suddenly grinned and raised the straw hat in her hand. In the distance, a child's voice could be heard calling, "Mother! Mother!"
He knew without turning around that it must be her husband and children.
She lifted the hem of her skirt and jumped out of the pavilion, rushing over to scoop up the leaping boy and hold him in her arms. She pressed her cheek against his and asked him something, and the chubby child nestled in her arms, acting spoiled and adoring, enjoying her doting and loving gaze. He smiled as his mother put the hat woven from wildflowers on his head and curiously reached out to touch it.
Du Yu forcibly took Xiao Yu in his arms: "He's gotten too heavy now, you shouldn't be carrying him so often."
Little Fish had his father's thick arm wrapped around his chest, leaving him unable to move up or down. He gasped for breath and said, "Mom, he's not holding me comfortably. I want you to hold me."
Zhenshu hurriedly took Xiaoyu from Du Yu's arms and said, "Your son has grown so big and you still haven't learned how to hold him. You're a careless father, not even as good as your own father."
Du Yu snatched the little fish from Zhen Shu's arms and put it on the ground, pointing at it fiercely and saying, "Walk by yourself. What kind of child this big still needs to be carried by their mother?"
Little Fish returned his hateful glare and said, "Fine, go your own way then."
He didn't care even more about his wet shoes, and would immediately dip his feet into the roadside ditch to scoop up a splash of water before running off. Du Yu shook his head angrily, saying, "You unfilial son! You unfilial son!"
Zhenshu felt uncomfortable hearing him speak of his son like that, and deliberately retorted, "Is he even more rebellious than you?"
Du Yu thought about it and agreed, then shook his head and said, "Retribution, retribution."
The family of three walked away, gradually disappearing at the end of the road where the poplar trees stood tall. Yu Yichen remained standing motionless, letting the clouds in the sky change and the birds fly back and forth in the fields. The rustling sound of the wind blowing through the valley caressed his heart, just like the sound of the Mingyue Qin when he was with her, and every smile and every look in her eyes, the way she cried and begged to go with him, the thoughts that moved in her mind as she rolled her eyes, and the panting sound when she couldn't climb out of the tunnel. All of this, along with the sound of the wind, flooded into his mind, filled his chest, and made his heavy shoulders almost unable to bear it, as if he was about to fall into the chestnut field.
He stood steadily, holding his staff, his shadow gradually stretching long behind him. Only when the birds returned to the forest and the insects chirped in the fields did a young novice monk run over, put his palms together, and ask, "Uncle-Master, are you going back?"
Yu Yichen reached out to support him and said, "Let's go."
He returned to his side hall, took off his straw sandals outside, and waited for the young novice to fetch water to wash his feet before putting on his boots again and entering the room. He sat down on a cushion in the inner room, unscrewed the hairpin, and carefully unfolded the tightly rolled, thin leather. Inside was a piece of paper with messy, illegible handwriting that made him purse his lips and smile slightly.
She wrote:
Even after killing you, I will shamelessly continue to live on.
I offer your hairpin before the Buddha because we are all destined for hell.
If you are already there, please wait for me.
Even if you suffer countless eons in hell, seeking an endless sentence, I will endure it with you.
If, after countless years, we can attain liberation in a single thought, then let us seek the chance to be together again, would that be good?
Yu Yichen summoned the fat monk and instructed him, "Go and dig out a jar of Shaoxing wine from under the row of willow trees at the base of the courtyard wall. Also, cut some dried plums, dried apricots, and rock sugar and scald them together in a double boiler. No need to boil them, just scald them until they are hot to the touch."
The fat monk frowned and said, "Uncle-Master, this is a 'trigger food' that you cannot drink. The abbot will be angry if he finds out."
Yu Yichen reached for the guqin on the wall, saying without turning his head, "If you don't tell him, how will he know?"
Before long, the fat monk brought in a cup of warm yellow wine. Yu Yichen pulled over a tray and placed it beside him, poured himself a cup, sipped it, and slowly began to play the strings of his zither. The fat monk wanted to listen some more, but Yu Yichen waved for him to leave.
On an early autumn night, the fat monk stood outside the door and heard a long, melodious sound rise up. The sound of the zither stirred the surrounding fields, condensing the darkness between heaven and earth into a lump in his chest. In an instant, it was like a long sword cleaving through the sky, opening up a clear and bright world.
Although he had no skill in playing the five tones, he was completely captivated by the music and asked through the curtain after a long while, "Uncle-Master, what piece is this?"
“Stop in Guangling!” Yu Yichen said, “Go and call back the men from the Yan Army Division of Blackwater Town. I’m going out for a walk in a bit.”
Four years ago, he fell into the icy canal and was shot in the back with an arrow, narrowly escaping death. Fortunately, he was saved by the Zen Master Kufa of Wanshou Temple, who took him to the ancient land of Heishui to seek medical treatment, which brought him back to life.
At the beginning, all the prefectures and border areas were searching for his whereabouts. Zen Master Kufa personally took charge, leading the monks to rush to the border with carriages. He was in a coma with a high fever. When he was about to cross the Yellow River, he woke up and saw the kind old Zen master holding his hand. He opened his mouth to ask him: Master, is it too late for your disciple to repent now?
Yu Yichen was too weak to ask that question, but the old Zen master saw through him with his wisdom and held his hand gently, saying, "Child, it is never too late to repent. Since you have a pure faith, the Buddha and Bodhisattvas will do their best to save you from suffering."
Yu Yichen closed his eyes and slept for two months before waking up again. In the Yan Army Command of Blackwater Town, the remnant city lord Shang Qiang, the youngest brother of his father and uncle of the fallen Western Xia, guarded Blackwater City, which had been granted to him by the Northern Khan. Since he had no son to continue the dynasty, he became the crown prince of Blackwater City, just like his father had been.
Later, as his health improved, although he was the crown prince, he did not reside permanently in Heishui City. Instead, he traveled between Liangzhou and Heishui, studying scriptures and practicing Buddhism under the tutelage of the Zen Master Kufa, who resided at Baita Temple. Later, when Du Yu arrived in Liangzhou, he moved Baita Temple outside the city. He then traveled with several novices, preaching and expounding the Dharma in various temples along the Hexi Corridor. He was a lay Buddhist with long hair, wearing a straw hat, and carrying a Zen staff.
The Yan Army Command in Heishui Town is not far from Liangzhou, and frictions frequently occur on their borders. Although Liangzhou has Du Yu, Heishui City also has many fierce generals, and with the support of the Mongol tribes to the north, Heishui City and Liangzhou can rely on each other.
He waited four years to finally see the woman he longed for again, knowing that she had a husband and children and was living a happy and fulfilling life. At this moment, he was more than satisfied and fulfilled. If he really wanted to find a way out, he would have to wait until he finished dealing with the miscellaneous matters in Blackwater City.
"Uncle-Master!" the fat monk outside suddenly called out.
"What is it?" Yu Yichen asked impatiently.
He had just hung the zither on the wall when he suddenly heard the sound of the curtain being lifted outside the door. He was not used to people barging into his room, and he frowned, about to get angry, when he heard a woman's trembling voice: "Yu Yichen!"
Yu Yichen almost lost his balance. He closed his eyes and took a deep breath for a long time before two streams of hot tears rolled down his cheeks. The hand that was holding the guqin slowly touched the wall as he turned around. It wasn't a hallucination after all. His adorable little shopkeeper was standing at the door, his forehead damp with sweat, his face beaming as he looked at him and called out softly again, "Yu Yichen!"
☆、130|Blackwater
She carried a sleeping child on her back. At their reunion after four years of separation, her courage was tempered with the maternal composure often found in adult women. She turned the child over and placed him on his bed before reaching out her arms, waiting for him to embrace her.
Seeing that Yu Yichen refused to come over, Zhenshu walked towards him step by step: "How could I not see you? Even if there were thousands upon thousands of monks in monastic robes standing in front of me at the same time, as long as you were among them, I could see you at a glance."
When he pulled her into his arms, she was already sobbing uncontrollably: "Since you were alive, why didn't you come and tell me? Why did you make me live with guilt for so long, making my life so difficult?"
Yu Yichen, still gazing at the sleeping child on the bed, asked, "How did you get out of the city? Didn't Du Yu look for you?"
Zhenshu shook her head: "Since I arrived in Liangzhou, I have been living in a separate residence from him, and he does not know that I left the city."
She patted her chest with great pride: "I am now a female household member."
Yu Yichen was still gazing at the little fish on the bed: "What about this child? Won't Du Yu look for him?"
Zhenshu then understood that what he cared about most was probably still this child. Now that she was a mother, her protectiveness towards her child surpassed all love for others: "This is my child. Although I have spoiled him and he is disliked by others, I must take him with me wherever I go and who I am with."
Yu Yichen released Zhenshu and sat down on the edge of the bed, gently stroking the face of the sleeping, thick-browed, big-eyed, and mischievous child with his fingertips. He was about three years old, the age when children are usually naughty and playful. Seeing Zhenshu looking at him anxiously, he pursed his lips and said softly, "How could I not like him? I like and love everything that belongs to you. Just as you said, he's been spoiled by you, and perhaps he's a little harder to deal with than you."
Zhenshu sat down on the ground, wrapped her arms around Yu Yichen's legs, and gently rubbed her cheek against the fabric of his gray monk's robe: "Please, please don't leave me again, okay? I've endured all these years alone because I thought I had killed you. I want to use my own eyes to see this world for you, and use my whole spirit to live for you. I want you to see everything I see, and I want you to be in everything I can sense. It is with this belief that I can live, and that is why I am willing to come to this place far from home to live alone with my child."
This place is close to your hometown. I often stand on the city wall and gaze into the distance, at the land that belonged to the fallen Western Xia dynasty. I think perhaps your soul wanders there. I'm ready to go there to find you and be with you when this child grows up.
Tears streamed down her face, and she could no longer speak. After crying for a long time, she finally calmed down and said, "Back at Wanshou Temple, I made a vow before the Buddha. I said: Buddha, if the person beside me is a real man, I am determined to marry him, even if I am abandoned heartlessly in the future, I will have no regrets or shame."
Yu Yichen sat on the edge of the bed, gently stroking the child's face with one hand and putting his arm around Zhenshu's shoulder with the other. He closed his eyes for a long time before opening them again. He looked at Zhenshu on the ground, who was looking up at him expectantly. He slowly bent down to touch her face, first pressing his lips to her forehead and then lifting them to her cheek, pecking little by little until he reached her lips.
The two lay down side by side on the plush carpet. Zhen Shu turned her head and stared at Yu Yichen without blinking. After a long while, she sighed, "You've changed. Although you're still the same person, your appearance and temperament have changed."
His skin was no longer as fair and smooth as before; it was slightly rougher. Compared to his former androgynous beauty, he now possessed a more masculine air, the kind only a true man should have. His eyes still held a gentle quality, but no longer the effeminate softness of before. Zhenshu reached out and touched his face: "The winds of the North must have roughened you up."
Yu Yichen reached out and took her hand: "So, you don't like it?"
Zhenshu grasped his hand and chuckled, "No, I like you very much, I like you no matter what you look like."
The two faced each other, speechless for a moment. Zhenshu looked up and sighed after a long time: "The first time I married a bandit, the second time I wanted to marry a eunuch, and this time I've made up my mind to marry a monk. You must not refuse me."
Yu Yichen, afraid of waking the child in bed, chuckled softly, "With me here, I doubt any monk in this temple would dare to marry you."
Zhenshu glared at him: "Aren't you a monk?"
Yu Yichen shook his head: "My six senses are not yet free from worldly desires and I cannot be ordained as a monk."
Just as Zhenshu was about to speak, the annoying voice of the fat monk outside rang out again: "Uncle-Master, your people from Blackwater City have arrived and are waiting outside the temple."
Yu Yichen pulled Zhenshu up, took a bamboo hat and put it on, then pointed to the sleeping child on the bed and asked, "Will he cry when he wakes up?"
He had never dealt with children before, especially since this little fish was such a mischievous and precocious child.
Zhenshu was momentarily stunned, realizing that he was probably going to take her away. She hurriedly asked while holding the child, "Where are you taking us? Du Yu will probably not know the news until tomorrow morning. There's no need to rush off like this."
Seeing that she was having some difficulty holding the child, Yu Yichen took the child and awkwardly held it in his arms. Du Xiaoyu's eyes suddenly opened: "Who are you? I want my mother."
Zhenshu immediately rushed over and took the little fish in her arms: "Mommy is here. I'm going to take you to a nice place. Quickly close your eyes and go to sleep."
How could Little Fish possibly sleep? She looked around for a long time, then pointed to the zither on the wall and exclaimed, "Mom, I want to play that!"
Yu Yichen was already waiting at the door. Zhen Shu had shamelessly clung to him again, so naturally he didn't dare to cause any trouble. He carried Xiao Yu and followed her out. When they arrived at the gate of the White Pagoda Temple, they saw hundreds of tall horses standing silently in the moonlight. Each horse was ridden by an adult man dressed in black.
A man led the horse over, and Zhenshu, slightly surprised, exclaimed, "Mr. Mei!"
Mei Xun was clearly surprised as well, and replied, "Miss Zhenshu!"
Yu Yichen patted Mei Xun on the shoulder, took a small fish from Zhen Shu's arms and handed it to him, saying, "Let's go back to Blackwater City tonight."
Mei Xun, holding a child, stared in disbelief. Yu Yichen had already thrown Zhen Shu onto his horse and then rode off into the distance.
In the darkness, Xiaoyu stared intently at Meixun with her eyes, and after a long while, she sighed, "My mother doesn't want me anymore!"
Mei Xun remained silent, picked up the child, mounted his horse, and followed the main force, galloping north towards Blackwater City.
Yesterday, before leaving the White Pagoda Temple, Zhen Shu glanced back at the temple and saw Yu Yichen. He was wearing a bamboo hat and holding a staff, standing in the millet field like a scarecrow. But he was who he was, and even if he turned to ashes, he would still be him. No matter where she was, she could recognize him at a glance.
To avoid arousing Du Yu's suspicion, Zhen Shu did not reveal it on the surface. After returning to the city, she finally managed to stay awake until dark. Fearing that Xiao Yu would cry on the way, she coaxed her to sleep before carrying the child out of the city overnight, heading towards Baita Temple to find him.
She had assumed that Yu Yichen had miraculously survived and was now a monk, but to her surprise, he was still heavily guarded. Clearly, even after his near-death experience, he hadn't changed his wicked nature and was probably up to some heinous crime again. Therefore, upon arriving at the capital, Zhen Shu was somewhat displeased. She leaned against Yu Yichen's chest and walked for a long time before finally speaking, "Tell me honestly, what heinous things are you doing now, and why are you making such a fuss?"
Yu Yichen knew exactly what she was thinking. He found it amusing but couldn't explain it clearly, so he asked her in return, "You must have been doing very well these past few years. You haven't left the city even once in the two years since you arrived in Liangzhou."
Zhenshu said bitterly, "Yes, I'm doing very well, as well as I could possibly be. At least you must think I'm doing very well, otherwise why would you have lived outside the city for two years, knowing that I was in Liangzhou City, and not sent anyone to give me a message, so that I wouldn't be living such a difficult and painful life? I really thought you were dead."
Seeing that she was truly angry, Yu Yichen quickly explained, "I never intended to take you with me, and I even stated in my letter that I intended to become a monk. Later, when we were releasing lotus lanterns by the canal, I told you not to enter the mountain gate with Du Yu. That was partly out of selfishness; I thought that if you went back and saw the letter, knowing that I was waiting at the mountain gate, and that you were unhappy with Du Yu and came to the mountain gate alone, I might still yearn for a secular life. But you didn't visit any temples in the capital, and after arriving in Liangzhou, you stayed in the city and never went out. I thought you and Du Yu were at least living harmoniously. If you were living a normal life, how could I disturb you?"