Chapter 105 Always
After returning from the cemetery and reading the letter, Jian Changnian sat with her for a while longer. Seeing that it was getting late, she prepared to get up and leave. Xie Shi'an looked at her.
"There probably aren't any more cars left, so I'll give you half of my bed."
The training base wasn't close to the city's central hospital; one was in the suburbs, and the other was in the city. Yet, Jian Changnian would bring her meals three times a day without ever complaining. Sometimes, if she arrived late at night and there was no transportation back, she would just make do on a bench in the corridor for the night. Xie Shi'an saw all her hard work, but she never said a word.
All that had happened in the past few days had brought the two of them closer together, and since she had taken the initiative to invite him, how could Jian Changnian refuse?
"Then I'll go take a shower. Do you have any extra pajamas?"
Xie Shi'an thought for a moment: "We have hospital gowns."
Jian Changnian: "..."
Okay, I'll make do with it.
Fortunately, the single room was spacious enough.
After she finished showering, she changed into Xie Shi'an's hospital gown, which surprisingly fit her well, except that the sleeves were a bit long.
In the darkness, Xie Shi'an lay on the bed. She walked over, climbed onto the bed, and lay down beside her.
Her hair was still damp, and her eyes were wet, like a fawn's.
"Shi'an, are you asleep?"
Asking a question you already know the answer to.
Xie Shi'an: "Yes, she's asleep."
Jian Changnian then moved even closer, using both hands and feet to cling to her like an octopus.
Xie Shi'an almost fainted from exhaustion; he could no longer bear it.
"Have you been secretly eating junk food behind Coach Yan's back again lately?"
A thought slipped out unconsciously, and Jian Chang buried it in her chest, her voice muffled: "I haven't had any appetite lately."
Yes, if there is anyone in the world who can truly empathize with her, it must be Jian Changnian.
While she was spending her days at home feeling like an eternity, she must have been so heartbroken and unable to eat or sleep.
The intense emotions have passed, leaving only a sorrow that slowly seeps into my bones and flesh, which resurfaces every time Yan Xinyuan is mentioned.
Jian Changnian's voice was very soft.
"Shi'an, I miss Coach Yan."
As she uttered those words, hot tears slid down her neck.
Xie Shi'an was taken aback, then slowly raised his hand and placed it on her back.
She didn't know when it started, but she no longer rejected being close to her. Besides, it had been a long time since she had held a living creature in her arms. The warmth of a living person was soothing her skin, and the blood in her chest, which had been chilled to the bone, began to flow again after a long time.
Jian Changnian sniffed and then told her more about Yan Xinyuan's passing.
“Shi’an, do you know? After Coach Yan passed away, I went to his dormitory to sort through his belongings. I found a small booklet in the drawer of his wardrobe. It was filled with names. It turns out that besides me, he had also sponsored many impoverished students.”
"He was such a frugal person that he wouldn't even buy a pack of good cigarettes. No wonder he couldn't save any money."
“When he was alive, we used to shout ‘Mediterranean’ every day, but now that he’s gone, nobody mentions it anymore.”
"Shi'an, are you listening?"
"Um."
Jian Changnian then continued talking to himself.
“The provincial team leader said he wanted to vacate his office. There were still many books on his desk, as well as newly drawn training plans that hadn’t been implemented yet. I couldn’t bear to throw them away, so I moved them all back to my dormitory. I also brought back his pipe.”
“He doesn’t have any relatives, and he doesn’t know who to give these things to. I’m keeping them as a keepsake.”
“I never had a father growing up. The first time I felt the warmth of a father’s love was when I was poisoned by drugs. He carried me to the hospital. So, he’s gone now. I’m really sad.”
"But I don't dare to cry in front of you."
"Then why do you dare to do it again now?"
Jian Changnian sniffed and then simply smeared all her tears and snot on her clothes.
"Just let it be now. If you can't hold it in anymore, it's too painful. If you want to cry, just cry. Besides, I'm holding you. Even if you wanted to commit suicide, you couldn't because I don't want to."
“If I were a germaphobe, I would have kicked you out by now.”
Jian Changnian burst into laughter through her tears.
"It's too late, we've already wiped it clean, and you're only telling us now."
Jian Changnian lay down again, hugging her arm tightly like a puppy, full of dependence.
In the dimly lit room, her eyes shone with tears.
"Shi'an, don't send me away. Coach Yan is gone, and I... I only have you left."
Xie Shi'an was startled, as if his heart had been hit hard, and a sour and astringent feeling spread from his chest to his eyes.
She loosened her grip on Jian Changnian's collar and instead gently patted her head.
"Go to sleep, tomorrow... there's still a lot to do tomorrow."
***
Before holding the press conference, Xie Shi'an visited Cheng Zhen at Jiangcheng City Prison.
The two people, who hadn't seen each other for a long time, felt somewhat unfamiliar with each other.
Cheng Zhen had a buzz cut and stubble on his chin. He was extremely thin, wearing an orange prison uniform and handcuffs and shackles, which made him look somewhat hunched over, but he still looked quite energetic.
The youthful vigor that Xie Shi'an possessed was gradually worn away.
After exchanging pleasantries, she still wanted to apologize to him in person, but before she could speak, Cheng Zhen asked the prison guard to help her return the CD that she had asked Jian Changnian to bring in.
Xie Shi'an stared blankly at the autographed record handed to him by the prison guard, and his eyes slowly reddened.
Cheng Zhen smiled through the glass, just as she always had.
“I think you need it more than I do right now.”
***
Early in the morning, Xie's mother was packing her things at home and even changed into a formal suit that she would only wear once in a hundred years.
Her husband watched her busy work with a cold eye.
"What do you mean? We don't need to take the kids to school today?"
"Today is Saturday, school is closed."
"Does that mean my child and I don't need to eat at home?"
Mrs. Xie slammed the wardrobe door shut.
“I know what you mean, but she is also my daughter, a piece of my flesh. I have abandoned her many times, but this time I must stand by her side!”
national team.
Conference Center.
Wan Jing displayed his name tag in front of all the leaders.
"If you want to blacklist Xie Shi'an, blacklist me first! When my senior brother was forced to leave because of Niu Niu, I couldn't do anything for him. When my apprentice retired, I was powerless. This time, I absolutely cannot stand by and watch you destroy a talented young man and ruin the future of our national badminton team!"
Seoul, South Korea.
In Kim Nam-ji's mansion.
The TV was on in the living room, and she sat on the sofa wiping her trophies, medals, and certificates of honor, which were scattered all over the table.
"It is reported that Xie Shi'an, a well-known badminton player who has been banned by the Chinese Badminton Association, will hold a press conference at 2 pm today. News about her match-fixing and moral depravity has been circulating widely on social media recently..."
South Korean media also reported on this matter extensively.
Park Min-heon swirled the red liquid in his wine glass.
"That's great, Nam Ji. It seems you've lost another formidable competitor."
Kim Nam-ji was wiping the gold medal from the London Olympics, lost in thought, head down and silent.
Park Min-heon called her name again.
"Nan Zhi, Nan Zhi, Xie Shi'an has been suspended. Aren't you happy?"
Kim Nam-ji looked up, threw the medal back into the box, and simply said, "Coach Park, I want to help her."
Given the Kim family's influence, while they may not be able to influence the Chinese Badminton Association's decisions, they could likely manipulate public opinion without much difficulty.
Park Min-heon was shocked and stood up.
"Kim Nam-ji, are you crazy?! Do you know how many gold medals you could have won in international competitions without her?!"
“Someone once told me that we are just rivals, not enemies. Coach Park, I’m already lonely enough, and I don’t want to lose my only… rival.”
***
More than a month later, this was Yin Jiayi's first media interview since retiring, in order to clarify the rumors that Xie Shi'an had excluded her from the national team.
Even after retiring, the former national team captain did not forget her responsibilities and did her best to protect her teammates.
Yin Jiayi spoke fluently to the camera.
"My retirement is solely due to injuries and some personal reasons, and has nothing to do with Xie Shi'an. Please do not make any excessive speculations."
"She is my rival, but also my friend. She has worked very hard all the way from the national competition. I know her very well. She loves badminton and this court more than anyone else. She is not the kind of person who would give up the spirit of sports, betray professional ethics, or abandon national honor for a little bit of petty gain."
"I guarantee with my integrity that everything above is true."
During the break between classes, when the next physical education class was about to begin, everyone had left the classroom, but Zhou Mu remained seated, engrossed in writing.
Her friend ran in from outside the classroom with a tennis racket and called her.
"Mumu, what are you doing? Let's go play ball."
Zhou Mu sat upright, writing each character carefully.
"I'm writing a letter to the Badminton Association."
My friend leaned over and took a look.