Chapter 36
Xiang Lan underestimated how terrible morning sickness was. The next morning, she made herself a cup of prenatal milk, but within ten minutes, she vomited it all up. Looking at her disheveled self in the mirror, she became afraid to eat anything. She could only wash some fruit and eat a piece to soothe her stomach when she was too hungry to bear it any longer.
The ambition she had set out for the night before had vanished without a trace.
When Deng Yifan received Fang Zidu's call and rushed over to keep her company, he found that she had become disheveled and unkempt when she opened the door.
"What happened to you?" Deng Yifan exclaimed in surprise. "You've lost so much weight in just a few days? And what's with your outfit?"
Xiang Lan pulled at her loose, dark coat and touched her hair. "Honey, I feel like I'm going to die. I have no energy, no spirit, and my whole body smells sour."
The coffee table in the living room was cluttered with various carving knives, crumpled paper was scattered all over the floor, and various sketches and proportion drawings were strewn about. The obsidian stone in the center of the table remained untouched.
"Your sweetheart called me and asked me to come keep you company." She held up a bunch of snacks and preserved plums in her hand. "And these are all things he specifically told me to buy for you. What's wrong, feeling nauseous?"
Xiang Lan swallowed hard when she saw the preserved plums, opened a pack and ate one, saying, "I threw up what I ate for breakfast today."
"There's one more thing, and your beauty needs to tell you this as well. That Song Haibo has been getting more and more crazy lately. He's been trying to find out your contact information and address everywhere, wanting to reconcile with you. Your beauty doesn't agree to reconcile and is afraid that he'll ambush you at school, so she asked me to tell you not to go to the school unless necessary."
"Why didn't he just tell me?" Xiang Lan wondered. "I just spoke to him on the phone last night."
"He feels that I have a greater influence on you."
The preserved plums were both sour and sweet, and Xiang Lan enjoyed them immensely. She watched as Deng Yifan skillfully made his way to the study, turned on the computer, and copied the films he had brought with him.
“It’s not that he thinks you have a big influence on me, but that he wants to firmly implement his will with me, but he doesn’t want to provoke a backlash from me. I’ve already protested to him about the management software and monitoring system, which has alerted him.”
"Are you playing a game of control and counter-control?" Deng Yifan opened the software, preparing to edit the video. "Zidu Meiren seems very gentle, not like you described—"
Xiang Lan paused for a moment, holding the preserved plum, pondering the distance between illusion and truth.
The screen displayed an image, and she forced herself to distract herself. "The film is finished? The chairman is really the male lead?"
Yes!
Where is the female lead?
Deng Yifan pointed to himself.
Xiang Lan was about to burst out laughing, but before she could finish, a wave of nausea surged through her chest. She tossed aside the preserved plum, rushed to the bathroom, and hugged the toilet tightly. After vomiting until there was nothing left to vomit, only clear water, her throat began to sting. She knew that her stomach acid had burned her esophagus.
She carried the hot water cup back to the study, only to find Deng Yifan with the lights dimmed, leaning back in his chair, intently watching the screen on his computer. On the screen, Li Xingda, dressed in a white shirt, exuded youthful energy and the anticipation of his first year of university, was dragged out of school by the rebellious female lead, drunk and reckless on the streets late at night. They laughed under the streetlights, oblivious to tomorrow; their unbridled exuberance almost leaped off the screen.
Xiang Lan looked at Deng Yifan's serious profile and her heart stirred. Looking into her eyes, sure enough, her gaze was fixed on Li Xingda and did not waver.
No wonder she was so eager for him to be the male lead in her film; it turns out she had this idea in mind.
She left the study, gently closed the door, and continued to stare blankly at her stone.
After finishing a section of work, Deng Yifan came out of the study, stretched, and said, "Hey girl, let's go out for a meal."
Xiang Lan turned her head, her face streaked with tears.
"you--"
"I just vomited blood," Xiang Lan cried. "I can't take it anymore—"
Where?
"In the toilet."
Deng Yifan rushed to look and saw that it was indeed bright red. She didn't understand anything and was scared half to death. He grabbed her and walked outside.
“You’re already like this, and you still have time to cry? Let’s go to the hospital right away! Have we notified your aunts and the others? They have experience, we need to tell them quickly.”
"I called my brother, he's coming right away." Xiang Lan wiped away her tears with the back of her hand. "Why is having a baby so troublesome? I haven't even done anything yet, and I'm already vomiting every day and can't eat. What will I do if my belly gets bigger later? I don't want to have this baby anymore—"
"The doctor will definitely have a solution. Don't say anything carelessly; the child can hear you."
"Are you stupid? Even if we're art students, we've at least studied basic biology. Right now, it's just a bunch of cells, at most the size of my fingertip. Can it even be considered a person?"
"So tell me what you want to do? You still have to have the baby, right?"
"Why am I so unlucky!" Xiang Lan was overwhelmed with grief again. The unease that Fang Zi had forcibly suppressed resurfaced. "I just wanted to have a romantic chat with this beauty, to kiss and touch her, who knew it would turn out like this? God must be against me—"
Deng Yifan had never seen Xiang Lan cry like this before. He was at a loss and was saddened by what she said. He remembered that he had actually fallen for Li Xingda, and that he was about to go abroad. This was even more heartbreaking than Xiang Lan's dramatic experience, and he couldn't help but tear up as well.
When Xiang Yuan and Hu Li arrived, they found the two girls hugging each other and crying, neither able to comfort the other.
He picked one up with each hand, asking, "What happened?"
Xiang Lan was sobbing and couldn't speak, while Deng Yifan stood aside, embarrassed, wiping his face.
"Cry, cry, all you do is cry." Xiang Yuan was annoyed and irritable. Seeing her thin and frail appearance, with her eyes red and swollen from crying, he felt extremely distressed and dragged her straight to the hospital.
Deng Yifan said embarrassedly, "Sister Hu, I'm sorry, I was just fooling around with her."
"Spend more time with her these days. She's not in a good mood because her son isn't here."
"I know."
Xiang Yuan pressed Xiang Lan into the back seat, and Hu Li followed and sat down to comfort her, "Don't cry or panic. It's just morning sickness. Your reaction might be a little more severe. Just adjust your diet and you'll be fine."
"You're useless." Xiang Yuan was furious at his lack of ambition.
“You don’t understand at all,” Xiang Lan retorted. “She’s in a lot of pain.”
"What's wrong? Every woman has to give birth, why aren't other women crying like you?"
"Sister-in-law, look at my brother! He's such a scumbag—"
"Don't listen to his nonsense, he's just worried about you."
"It's easy for him to talk when he's not in my shoes. Why don't you let him try vomiting three times a day? My throat hurts so much right now, I vomit even when I drink water, what should I do?"
Hu Li put his arm around Xiang Lan, patted her shoulder, and whispered words of comfort to her.
Xiang Yuan drove with a gloomy face, listening to the intermittent crying all the way. When they arrived at the hospital, Xiang Lan couldn't help but drink some water. However, while they were still queuing to get a number, she rushed out and vomited violently.
After seeing the doctor, she received little constructive advice, mainly just being advised to eat more vegetables, avoid cooking, and avoid cooking fumes—things Xiang Lan had always done. After leaving the hospital, she felt desperate, especially since her legs were starting to feel weak when she walked. How could she hold a carving knife like this?
“I’ll have Aunt Wang bring you meals every day, all light and simple,” Hu Li said. “Take a walk in the neighborhood every morning to improve your physical condition.”
Xiang Yuan really wanted her to go back to Liu Zewen's place, but that seemed to go against their original plan to deal with them. He was starting to regret it; if things continued like this, it would be Xiang Lan who would suffer, while Fang Zi would be completely unaffected.
"No," Xiang Lan said defiantly. "I said I wanted your help, so I don't need it."
"Are you still angry with your sister-in-law?"
"No. My brother is petty. Now that he's using Aunt Wang, he'll bring up old grievances when we argue later." Xiang Lan glanced sideways at Xiang Yuan.
When will Fang Zidu return to China?
"It'll probably take at least half a month, right?" Xiang Lan wasn't entirely sure. "Things over there need to be handed over, so it won't be quick. His decision to return to work in China was also very rushed. Originally, I was supposed to go there—"
Xiang Yuan immediately snapped at her, "Why did you go there? He should be the one to accommodate you."
"Don't take it out on Lanlan. The two kids have tried their best too. Let's all be understanding. It'll only be a month or two." Hu Li rushed towards Yuan. "In this world, is there anyone who only benefits and doesn't suffer any losses? Isn't it all about being willing?"
"Isn't she just resentful now? Am I wrong to defend her?"
“That’s right.” Hu Li said patiently, “She’s your sister, she’s family. She’s not ignorant. You should teach her and help her, instead of standing around like an outsider watching the show or throwing tantrums like this.”
"She's completely ruined now, with no job or life left. What's she going to do? She's been raised for twenty years, only to be a housewife who does laundry, cooks, and has children for a man?" Xiang Yuan was so angry that he spoke without thinking.
“This is her life, and you can’t interfere.”
"She clearly had so many more options—"
Xiang Lan walked silently toward the parking lot, taking her brother and sister-in-law's words to heart.
The parking lot was filled with the smell of exhaust fumes. She covered her mouth and nose with her sleeve, forcibly suppressing her nausea and vomiting.
Xiang Yuan walked up, opened the car door, and Xiang Lan got in. She closed her eyes to rest, but her mind was very active. How exactly could she break through this predicament?
"Xiang Lan, I'm being serious with you. It's not too late now, you have a choice, so don't have this child for the time being. I have no objection if you like Fang Zidu, you can be with him. But, wait until you two are both settled before considering having children, okay?"
He turned to Yuan and said earnestly.
Xiang Lan opened her eyes, glared at him furiously, and seeing his unwavering stance, she opened the car door and ran away.
Hu Li was also a little angry and shouted, "Xiang Yuan, how could you say that to her? She's your sister!"
"If she weren't my sister, why would I care if she died?"
Xiang Lan hurried home, stopping at the mall to buy some pre-packaged vegetables. Living alone wasn't that difficult. She felt a surge of anger; Fang Zi was absolutely right. Whenever she asked them for help, they always found excuses to control her life. She was such a fool, suffering so many losses without learning her lesson. Why had she called him again? She vowed never to contact Xiang Yuan again, never letting him interfere with her life in the slightest.
She ate a few bites of the raw vegetable and fruit salad, then moved the obsidian to the windowsill, sat on a small stool, and looked up at it.
She thought to herself, this is truly a painful process. The difficulty of bringing a work from conception to its actual completion is no less than that of giving birth to an offspring. She touched her lower abdomen, and there really was a new universe happening inside her body, but she was too weak, as if she couldn't do anything at all.
Her phone kept ringing. There were text messages from Xiang Yuan and phone calls from Hu Li. One was pressuring her, and the other was comforting her, telling her not to be affected by Xiang Yuan's crazy words.
However, if a person's energy is limited, some things are destined to be mutually exclusive, and it's time to start considering giving up.
Xiang Lan waited silently for Fang Zidu. Many times on the phone, she wanted to say that evil word, but she couldn't say it through the air.
Half a month later, Fang Zidu got off the plane, travel-worn. When he opened the door, Xiang Lan was holding a carving knife, looking at him in shock with a pained expression.
He said, "Xiang Lan, I'm back."
Xiang Lan didn't know why she had suddenly become so prone to tears. She put down the knife, got up, hugged him, and inhaled his scent, saying, "Fang Zidu, what should I do? I can't carve anything anymore."
"Is that why you locked yourself up? Don't worry, we can wait a little longer."
She tilted her head back, her chin sharp and pointed. Pregnancy hadn't made her gain weight; in fact, it had made her thinner. "Why do we have to wait? I don't want to." Her grape-like black eyes looked at the haggard Fang Zidu and said, "Zidu, tell me, how about we wait until later to have a child, okay?"
She finally spoke out, and she awaited the storm that was about to break.
Chapter 37
Xiang Yuan bypassed Xiang Lan and contacted Fang Zi directly. Of course, he didn't mention his little suggestion, only saying that Xiang Lan had locked herself up and wouldn't see anyone, and that the pregnancy hormones were making her very strange.
Fang Zidu's schedule was compressed due to Xiang Yuan's urging. He only had time to submit his resignation in writing, hand over some of his lab work, and pack and mail his belongings from the house. However, some furniture couldn't be disposed of, so he gave it to classmates and friends there. Xiang Yuan described the situation as very serious, and the news he received from Deng Yifan was also not optimistic. Xiang Lan herself refused to use the monitoring system and was very listless during their phone call. Fang Zidu knew, of course, that women undergo certain changes during pregnancy due to hormonal influences, but he hadn't expected these changes to have such a negative impact on Xiang Lan.
He declined Lin Li and his boss's offer to stay, quickly finished his errands, had dinner with his friends, and then returned to China with six huge suitcases. Lin Li very kindly promised to take care of the follow-up issues for him.
He hadn't expected that the first thing he'd hear when he got home would be his wife's capricious demand that he agree to remove one of the family members he was so eagerly anticipating welcoming.
Fang Zi didn't answer immediately. He simply pushed Xiang Lan away gently and said, "I have too much luggage. Do you want me to help you unpack?"