After waiting for a while, I thought he had already left, when I saw a few words appear on the computer: "Great. It's a little princess, and she can already call me 'Daddy'."
"Hehehe, congratulations!" I imagined that little girl must have fair skin and big eyes; she must be a very lovable little one. Wilson must be online so late to coax this pretty baby to close her eyes with those long eyelashes.
"And you? Are you still alone?"
"Hehehe." I didn't comment, but suddenly I was annoyed that Willson asked me this question so casually, as if a stranger was asking how much money I had in my bank account.
"There's something I want to tell you." Willson typed quite quickly.
"If you apologize to me, I'll put on iron-tipped boots and kick your ass!" I typed out the sentence quickly, afraid that he would beat me to it.
"You're always so sensitive."
Is this a compliment or an insult?
"I promised you I would never apologize to you." I paused for a moment, and some seemingly distant memories were painfully awakened. I felt a pang of sadness, not for the person on the other side of the internet, but for myself and that frantic breathing in April.
I'm suddenly very fortunate that, although I always seem to be shaken off the glamorous coat of love like a lice, I haven't become so cynical as to think that love is all about losing and forgetting.
"Can we meet up for dinner tomorrow?" Willson asked with a nervous expression.
I laughed immediately: "No, lest you fall in love with me again without realizing it."
Willson responded with a smiley face: "I will never fall in love with you again, because I have always loved you."
I gently clicked "Close," and a moment of silence fell over my mind. Suddenly, I remembered Hai Zi's poem:
Facing the sea, with spring flowers in bloom, starting tomorrow, I will be a happy person...
Part Two, Chapter Thirty
I woke up after a good night's sleep, the sun already high in the sky. I lingered in bed for a while, still half-asleep, before reluctantly opening my eyes. My phone was beeping with a low battery warning. I picked it up to change the battery and saw sixty-four missed calls, all from Shan Jie and Liu Yiming. What happened now?! I quickly grabbed the home phone and dialed.
Shan Jie shouted, "Boss, you finally called back! I'm so annoyed!"
"Stop it. Being depressed is a privilege reserved for handsome guys. You're just suffering from a hormonal imbalance at best. Get to the point, why are you in such a hurry to see me?"
"Koizumi went to the Yasukuni Shrine again. The whole world is now protesting against Japan and boycotting Japanese goods, but today someone online is spreading rumors that our company has Japanese investment. Our website has been hacked 33 times today, and our online flower ordering system has been basically paralyzed all day..."
Things unfolded much faster than Shan Jie had described, and everything happened so suddenly: the Japanese company stated that the investment environment in China was unsatisfactory, so the investment plan would be postponed indefinitely. They didn't say they were quitting, just that it was postponed, and the contract even exempted the contractor from liability for the postponement! What kind of ridiculous contract is this?! I remember revising this clause in the first draft, and I even checked the third and fourth drafts to make sure it wasn't there. So how come it's blatantly written there in the original contract I have now? Liquid seeped down my back, and that ominous premonition made me feel like disaster was imminent. Suddenly, I foolishly wished I could lie down and sleep again, and when I woke up, all the trouble would be gone.
Just when I was in a state of utter panic, I received a phone call. A very gentle female voice told me, "Ms. Li, Chairman Yin asked me to tell you that if your mind has changed, please call him."
Strange. Does that old fox Yin really think things will still be under my control these days? It seems Yin Tianyu should strengthen his communication with his father; letting the old man worry like this will likely shorten his lifespan. But to be honest, his delusion gives me a dishonorable sense of pleasure, and I even quite enjoy the possibility of this delusion continuing. So, out of nowhere, I said, "Please tell Mr. Yin that I look forward to his next even more brilliant move." I hung up the phone with a flourish, feeling like I was almost as charismatic as Wen Jiabao. Only when I glanced at the huge stack of expense requests on the table did I realize that showing off comes at a price.
Where can I get a large sum of money right away?
"Boss, we're on the front page!" Shan Jie rushed in, holding a newspaper. "It's all about our website being blocked." Liu Yiming followed behind, remaining silent as always.
I picked up the newspaper and scanned it listlessly. If I had money, I could hire a bunch of reporters and quickly clear my name, but where would I get the money now?
"How much working capital is left in the finance department's account?" I asked Shan Jie.
Dan Jie hesitated for a moment, but Liu Yiming had already quickly recited the number beside him. Dan Jie blushed slightly, but I pretended not to notice and continued to say to Dan Jie, "You, go and withdraw all the money in the account and give it to me immediately."
"Yes!" Shan Jie agreed and ran outside.
"Wait!" Liu Yiming stopped Shan Jie. "Boss Li, what are you doing withdrawing all the money?" His eyes were full of distrust.
Dan Jie stood there, stunned, glancing at Liu Yiming, then at me, somewhat at a loss. Not to mention him, I never expected Liu Yiming, who rarely expressed his opinions, to ask such a question.
"I have my own use." Suddenly, a thought struck me: in these extraordinary times, I could no longer reveal everything, so I laid a trap.
“But withdrawing all the cash now is like taking control of the company’s lifeline. I think you should only use this money if more than half of the people vote in accordance with the cooperation agreement.”
I glared fiercely at Liu Yiming's face. If this were a beef patty, I would have eaten him in one bite! Liu Yiming, however, remained as calm as ever in the face of my fierce expression.
"Okay, as you wish. Let's start the meeting, right now!"
In the meeting room, everyone's expressions were grave. After explaining the company's current predicament, I looked at each and every one of my comrades who had fought alongside me these past few days, and said in the most sincere tone I had ever used: "Everyone, I am very grateful for the opportunity you have given me to face challenges and learn and grow with you all during this time. This experience with you will be one of my most precious memories. However, today, we are facing the most severe challenge since the company opened. Now, we have one more opportunity, but due to operational needs, I cannot explain the specifics of this opportunity to you. What I can tell you is that if we give up this opportunity, we will 'bloom'..." "We'll withdraw from this position now. If we seize this opportunity, our future will be smooth sailing. However, for me, your trust is more important and precious than this opportunity. If we lose trust in each other, even if we overcome this crisis, our 'blooming' will be nothing more than a fleeting moment. Therefore, I declare that even if this vote passes with a majority, it will not count as a pass; even if there is only one vote against, I will abandon this plan. Please inform me of the results, Shan Jie." After saying this, I didn't look at anyone again and walked out of the meeting room alone, leaving the battlefield to those bewildered souls.
Back in my room, I immediately closed the door, took out a bunch of data and charts, and started calculating non-stop.
When Shan Jie knocked on the door thirty minutes later and told me that the plan, which nobody knew what it was, had been unanimously approved, I only glanced up from the pile of charts briefly to ask him to convey my gratitude to everyone before immediately burying myself back into the complex calculations. I wondered if Shan Jie had heard the loud "thump!" in my heart. This risky gamble of "putting myself in a do-or-die situation" had finally paid off. I didn't have time to persuade them one by one; I could only rely on the remaining wishful thinking and unrealistic fantasies of most of them to suppress the distrust of the small minority. A few people pressuring one person was better than me trying to persuade several. I secretly wiped away a cold sweat. I had used all my wit and only managed a fifty percent chance through shamelessness. The other fifty percent truly depended on divine intervention, because my grand, nobody-known money-making plan was—a small bet for a big win—buying lottery tickets! If the people in the meeting room knew how things were going, countless of them would go crazy.
I used a bunch of probability formulas to calculate a few results. At least this has some intellectual investment and scientific value, right? The government also supports the lottery! I comforted myself a little guiltily, thinking that at least I was different from other laid-off workers and retirees who buy lottery tickets.
Being called a "proletarian" is extremely disheartening, but once the word "hooligan" is added before it, the identity immediately becomes very promising. So, while stuffing the lottery ticket into my pocket, I bought myself a new quilt and pillow. If I lose this time, I'll only have one place to go, and luckily I'm single. A complex mix of emotions welled up inside me.
Years later, when I recall those twenty hours of waiting for judgment, which seemed endlessly stretched in my memory, besides being astonished by my own inexplicable audacity, the first thing that comes to mind is a delicious dish—grilled saury. Because that feeling, like being placed in a scorching hot iron pot with a roaring fire under your pillow, no matter how you're in that position, always leaves you feeling anxious and uncertain.
Actually, besides going all in, I should have had many other options. For example, I could have tried to persuade another bank—no matter the outcome, at least I would have tried. Or perhaps I should have simply given up. It seems I've never truly faced what I lost, or how precious that loss was.
I no longer had the courage to face those pure, hopeful faces in the company, so I locked myself in my room and went online. But as I kept going to the bathroom, I suddenly noticed two large blisters on the corners of my mouth in the mirror.
Part Two, Chapter Thirty-One