Résurrection de cadavres

Chapitre 11

Huang Mao suppressed a laugh, his eyes darting around cleverly, and took a few steps forward before slipping into a small door.

Xu Haibing rubbed his sore nose and quickly followed. Seeing a sign with a pipe design on the small door, he knew it was the men's restroom and waited there without worry.

A moment later, he heard someone come out from inside and felt the moment of truth had arrived! He smugly blocked the doorway, but his face flushed crimson to the roots of his neck—

What appeared before him was a woman with a large mouth, fastening her belt while glaring at him fiercely!

He hesitantly pushed aside the woman who stood like a wall in his way, and examined the sign on the door more closely—

Huh? Why are they high heels!

Thinking Xu Haibing was about to further harass her, the woman with the large mouth switched from defense to offense, grabbing him tightly and yelling with her mouth wide open, "You idiot! Come and catch this pervert!"

...

A short while later, Xu Haibing was dragged out by Er Lengzi and the fat security guard by the male doctor, each by their ears, and they gathered in the bloody courtyard where chickens and sheep were being slaughtered and flies were swarming.

The simpleton complained to the male doctor, "That guy's a pervert! He dared to peep at the landlady while she was relieving herself!"

The male doctor exposed Er Lengzi: "This idiot is causing trouble, trying to get away with using snot!"

"I'm going to beat you to death--!" With a loud shout, the big-mouthed woman, her clothes open and holding a thick, long rolling pin, suddenly appeared out of nowhere and started swinging it at the fat security guard!

"It's him, it's him..." The fat security guard pointed at Xu Haibing as he ran away with his head in his hands.

The woman with the big mouth then turned to Xu Haibing, raising and lowering her cane with a swift, powerful motion.

Xu Haibing dodged and weaved, causing the big-mouthed woman to rain down her rolling pin, which she used to wash away the humiliation, on the chickens, sheep, Er Lengzi, and the male doctor, making the yard a chaotic mess with chickens flying and sheep bleating.

Xu Haibing fled in the chaos.

Hearing the commotion, the security guard who had been dozing off inside the hall got up and tried to stop Xu Haibing. Xu Haibing pointed at the fat security guard in front of him and said, "He's a thug. I'm going to chase him." With that, he ran out of the hall.

The woman with the big mouth was quick-witted and swift-handed. She swung the rolling pin, which bounced a few times before striking Xu Haibing's right ankle.

Xu Haibing stood on one leg, tripping over his left leg, and escaped from the hotel.

The woman with the big mouth chased after him to the door, patting her large breasts, jumping up and down, and shouting at the top of her lungs, "Come on! Come on if you dare! I'll keep you coming back until dark, let's see who can outlast whom!"

As dusk settles, day and night are drawing to a close.

The chubby security guard rubbed his ear, while Xu Haibing limped away, retreating into the murky street.

The chubby security guard looked pained: "...Sigh, losing money is a small matter, but losing my integrity is a big deal! I've tarnished the glorious image of a people's security guard, let down the company's Party Committee's training, and failed my great-grandfather, parents, and my second uncle's high hopes! This is truly unbearable! I'm so regretful, I'm practically kicking myself..."

Xu Haibing didn't have time to pay attention to him. The image of the men's and women's signs on the hotel restroom door kept flashing before her eyes. She muttered in confusion, "It's definitely men's and women's signs, I didn't see wrong!!"

The two men were walking dejectedly when, "whoosh—" the chubby security guard shrank back, feeling something slide down his spine, but couldn't reach it with his hand. Xu Haibing quickly pulled it out for him; it was a smoking cigarette butt. Looking up—

That blond kid was making faces at them from the front!

Xu Haibing slapped the fat security guard's butt: "Chase him!"

One ran with a crooked leg and the other with his buttocks sticking out, their unusual postures attracting curious glances from passersby. Xu Haibing had no choice but to tug on the back of the fat security guard's shirt, and the two switched from running to brisk walking.

I watched as the blond-haired guy skipped and hopped into a large shopping mall.

The shopping mall was brightly lit.

The dazzling array of goods on the shelves and the bustling crowd left Xu Haibing and the chubby security guard, who had just barged in, completely bewildered.

Xu Haibing caught sight of the blond-haired man appearing on the escalator and called to the chubby security guard to catch up.

As the elevator ascended halfway, Xu Haibing and the chubby security guard turned around and saw Huang Mao waving at them from the descending escalator opposite.

There was no time to turn back, so Xu Haibing quickened his pace and rushed onto the elevator. He then stepped onto the down elevator and turned around to see Huang Mao waving to him from the other side of the elevator.

Xu Haibing hurriedly waved to the chubby security guard who had just come up behind him, signaling him to turn back and intercept him.

The fat security guard had just turned around when he was knocked forward by inertia, leaving him with no choice but to stick his butt out high and let it fall down.

As Xu Haibing was about to step back up the stairs after descending them, the chubby security guard above shouted in fear, "Don't go! Catch me!"

Xu Haibing quickly got into position, ready to catch the chubby security guard who was falling backward. Just then, he heard a familiar voice. He turned his head and saw a familiar figure arm in arm with a richly dressed woman as they went up the escalator.

The figure glanced sideways at Xu Haibing from behind!

"Guo..." Xu Haibing had just remembered who this person was when everything went black—

"Thump!" The fat security guard, who looked like a big, clumsy bear, rolled over on top of him!

Xu Haibing struggled to move the fat security guard aside, got up and rushed onto the elevator, ran up to the fourth floor, and surveyed the shopping hall. Finally, he saw the beautifully dressed Guo Qinqin leaning against that elegant and dignified woman with her hair piled high, selecting jewelry in front of the gold cabinet.

QQ Lost, Episode 17(3)

Xu Haibing was about to move closer to observe her when he suddenly noticed that Huang Mao had just flashed past him. He immediately turned around and stepped onto the descending stairs.

Guo Qinqin, standing at the counter, slightly raised her head to smooth her bangs that were falling to her left forehead, and glanced at Xu Haibing as she went...

On the descending escalator, just as the blond-haired man was about to land, he suddenly leaped forward, braced himself against the thick back of the fat security guard who was bending over to stand up, and flew over him like a vaulting horse. The fat security guard was so frightened that he shrank back and almost sat back down.

Xu Haibing shouted as he descended the stairs, "Don't let him get away!"

The chubby security guard realized what was happening and gave chase.

The blond-haired man nimbly darted out of the mall through a narrow, non-trading passageway.

The chubby security guard who lunged forward got stuck firmly in the passageway and couldn't move...

QQ Lost 18(1)

Xu Haibing, who had gotten off to a bad start and was now in a state of chaos, limped into his house, turned on the living room chandelier, changed into slippers, and hobbled to his bedroom.

He tried turning the lock a few times but couldn't open it, so he angrily knocked on the door. The door opened, and Mao Dan's little head popped out. "Shh—" he made a mysterious shushing gesture with his finger up, then withdrew and continued operating the computer.

许海冰进得卧室，一看显示屏上的内容，气不打一处来，揪住毛蛋的耳朵就吼："好小子，你萝卜头大点，就敢谈情说爱了？！看我不告诉你爸，揍扁了你！"

Mao Dan broke free: "Uncle, please calm down. To tell you the truth, my current identity is that of my father!"

"ah?!"

While operating the device, Mao Dan confessed, "I'm playing detective. My dad's been acting a bit strange lately—like he's having an intestinal problem. My mom keeps nagging him, saying he's been bewitched by some online vixen. Today, while my dad's away on a business trip, I'm impersonating him and chatting with his female QQ friends, hoping to follow the trail and find out which one is his mistress."

Seeing that he understood, Xu Haibing reached out and grabbed Mao Dan: "Let me have you, I'm doing detective work too!"

"Hey, we're all part of the world now, how come you still have no sense of rules? Even going to the toilet requires a first-come, first-served rule. I finally got my prey, and now the line's broken and she's gone. Besides, I'm just trying to protect the interests of your Xu family's daughter. Look at this auntie I've hit on, the one called 'Big Breasts and Wide Hips,' she's definitely having an affair with my dad. She keeps calling me 'husband, husband,' I bet she's slept with me, oh no, with my dad."

Xu Haibing suddenly remembered something and pulled out a note with Shen Daxing's QQ number from his pocket: "A classmate gave me a QQ number he used, but he forgot to tell me the password. Do you know how to open it?"

"Yes, I have."

"what to do?"

"That's not easy. Why don't you just go ask him?"

"You dare mess with me! I've got my eye on you now. If you can crack this password, I'll let you use the computer tonight."

"Just tonight?"

"Okay, and I also agree to sign that 'win-win' agreement you proposed last time."

"Deal!" Mao Dan gave his uncle a high five, then took out a CD case from his backpack, found a CD labeled "Hacker Files," put it in the computer bay, and started operating.

Xu's mother, who had just returned from buying steamed buns, poked her head in: "Oh dear, you little rascal, why aren't you doing your homework? What are you doing playing on the computer? Computers aren't good for kids; they shouldn't touch them. Yesterday's evening paper even had a case about a teacher's college student who visited pornographic websites in an internet cafe and then went out on the street to harass women. He ended up in jail..."

"What nonsense! Go away!" Xu Haibing shooed his mother away and closed the door.

Using hacking software, Mao Dan quickly obtained the password: "OK, done! Hey, your classmate's online name sounds really rustic, 'Brother Erhei,' are you going to change it?"

"No changes, no changes, exactly as stated."

"Huh, why is nobody online?" Mao Dan saw that the pop-up QQ panel was full of black and white faces, so he opened the "blacklist" and saw two colored faces hiding there. He clicked to open the chat box, typed "Hello," and sent it.

The colorful face on the panel immediately flashed in response.

Mao Dan grinned smugly at his uncle, then took over, widened his eyes, and read the reply word by word:

"I am masturbating, please do not disturb me."

Xu Haibing quickly covered his eyes with her hand and pulled him away: "Don't listen to or look at what you shouldn't. Stand aside and watch me."

Mao Dan, still confused, kept asking, "What's masturbation, Uncle?" Xu Haibing didn't answer, but clicked on another colorful face in the "Blacklist" section and sent a greeting:

"Okay, friend!"

A moment later, the other party's avatar flashed. Now it was Xu Haibing's turn to show off. He typed "銧子" (a type of Chinese character) at Mao Dan, then received the message. The chat box displayed:

"Climb up ^^^^^"

Now it was Xu Haibing's turn to be confused: "What does that mean? Is there a typo?"

Mao Dan shook his head, feigning ignorance: "Waaah, I don't know."

Xu Haibing replied, humbly seeking advice from the other party:

"Excuse me, what does 'climb' mean?"

The other party's face flashed, and Xu Haibing received the message again. He glanced at the chat box:

"Just get out! Get out of here, I'm annoyed, get out!"

The balut was hilarious.

Xu Haibing gritted his teeth in anger.

Mao Dan comforted him, "What's there to be angry about? Nobody can control what anyone says online. Uncle, let me tell you, the internet is a virtual world, don't take it seriously. Even if a pretty girl sends you a picture one day, she might actually be a scruffy old man with a scraggly beard. So, no matter how warmly you chat with someone, or how well you click, you must adhere to four basic principles: 1. Don't leave your address; 2. Don't leave your phone number; 3. Don't arrange to meet; 4. Don't reveal your real identity. In short, to sum it up in one sentence—don't speak like a human being, oh no, I mean don't speak the truth! Also, every time you chat, log in anonymously. That way, you're hiding in the shadows, able to see others but not be seen by them. You can talk to whoever you want, and insult whoever you want."

As he spoke, he squeezed past Xu Haibing and sat down at the computer, typing out three numbers: 748! After sending it, he glared at the Facebook profile picture and said viciously, "Go to hell!"

Then, Mao Dan casually pulled a few coins from his pocket and slammed them on the table, saying to Xu Haibing, "How about that? I've gotten revenge for your insult. Now, you'll have to go to an internet cafe outside. Just turn left and then right when you get out, and you'll be there in no time."

This is a dimly lit, smoky internet cafe that looks like a dilapidated warehouse. People are playing games, watching movies, listening to music, chatting, playing chess and cards, and even singing vulgar songs and arguing. All sorts of "internet addicts" are crammed into the room, making a noisy scene, but enjoying themselves.

Xu Haibing held the number plate and walked through the crowd, finally finding an empty seat in a corner to sit down.

QQ Lost 18(2)

He used Shen Daxing's QQ number and password to access the QQ panel on his computer. He saw a female user with the username "Water Lily" whose avatar was in color, so he clicked to greet her.

"Wow, a beauty sculpted from nature."

The water lily mask flashed, replying:

"Hello, Erhei-ge, long time no see."

An image of a pure and lovely young girl immediately appeared in his mind, and he couldn't help but feel excited. So, using Shen Daxing's online name "Erhei Ge," he started chatting with her back and forth with words:

Erhei: "Yeah, I really miss you."