Ruolan rose and knelt down, her words so straightforward: "Sister, you're too kind. Sister, you're suffering from a cold; it should be me visiting you. Instead, I've troubled you to come see me. I deserve to die for this!" Ruolan truly didn't understand the palace's intrigues, but she knew how to speak without giving anyone a reason to criticize her. This was what Xuebin valued. Although these underhanded schemes were terrifying, they could be prevented. What was most frightening was that she couldn't speak properly, which gave someone an open opportunity to harm her.
"Hehe, little sister, you're exaggerating," I said, standing up and gently supporting her with my voice. Then I sat down again. Peony served tea and stood next to Ruolan, reminding her what she could and couldn't do.
“Sister, I heard that the Emperor has been staying in Xilan Palace ever since you entered the palace. You know, the Emperor is everyone’s Emperor, and I should remind him sometimes.” I took the teacup from Shanzhu and said my purpose for coming here with a hint of pressure. Why couldn’t I be more tactful? Tactful my ass! Since my relationship with Xuebin is just an act, I’m not afraid that Ruolan will accuse me of spying on the Emperor. After all, I still have to pave the way for his beloved. He certainly won’t punish me at this time. He’s just looking for trouble.
"Sister..." Ruolan was about to say something when she heard a eunuch outside the hall shout, "The Emperor has arrived!" She felt a surge of joy, but when she saw the Imperial Noble Consort looking at her, she suppressed the smile that was about to appear and quietly waited for Bin's arrival.
I covered my smile with my teacup. Heh, he came so quickly. He couldn't wait any longer. It seems he's really interested in this girl. He even came in person. Is he afraid I'll make things difficult for his beloved? Doesn't he remember who told me to protect her? Now he's on guard against me.
"What are the concubines talking about?" Xuebin asked as he stepped in, knowing that Zixue was there.
Everyone in the "May Your Majesty be blessed" hall knelt down, including me.
"My beloved concubine, please rise." I thought Xuebin would help Ruolan up to prevent her from kneeling. I didn't think much of it because I didn't care about him. But to my surprise, he helped me up instead. I was really taken aback. How could this guy be so unpredictable sometimes? But I still stood up.
Ruolan saw Bin walk past her with a smile and help the Imperial Noble Consort up. She bit her lower lip and told herself that she had to be strong. Since she had entered the palace, she had to learn to watch Bin befriend other women. In front of her, the Imperial Noble Consort was someone else. If Bin helped her up, it would definitely make the Imperial Noble Consort lose face.
"Is Your Majesty worried that I will make things difficult for my sister? That's why Your Majesty followed me here so soon after I arrived," I said with a light laugh, though it didn't sound sarcastic. The other meaning behind my words was, "Are you a dog? Why are you following me like this?"
Xuebin understood what Zixue meant, but he couldn't say anything. He was indeed afraid that Zixue would make things difficult for Ruolan. Over the past two years, he had come to know that Zixue had this kind of wicked sense of humor and liked to make fun of people. However, Ruolan was the person he loved, so how could he let her play with him like that? Therefore, he came to stop her.
"Look at what my beloved consort is saying. How could I think such a thing? I received a rare treasure from the envoy and wanted to show it to my beloved consort. However, the servants in my consort's palace reported that you had arrived at Xilan Palace, so I rushed here." Xue Bin knew that he had hurt Lan'er's feelings by saying this, but he had to do it. Lan'er had been favored for a long time and it would cause her harm. Now it was time to ask Zi Xue to protect her.
I smiled faintly, saying nothing. Xuebin had finally come to her senses and realized that spoiling her like this was wrong. She pushed me out so quickly. I had originally wanted her to further develop her relationship with the concubines in the harem. I nodded slightly and said, "Then, Your Majesty, I will accompany you to look at this treasure. Sister, don't kneel, get up. Your Majesty is really something, how could you make your sister kneel for so long?" I said coquettishly. Ha, since you made me suffer the attacks of the concubines in the harem, then it is only right that I make your beloved sad. It is time to add a timely obstacle to your love.
I laughed triumphantly, I laughed triumphantly.
Xuebin gave a wry smile. This Zixue really does trip me up from time to time. It seems I'll have to comfort Lan'er properly tonight.
"Your Majesty, I respectfully bid farewell to the Imperial Noble Consort." Ruolan felt bitter inside, but she couldn't show it. When Bin said those words, she felt a chill in her heart, but she still told herself not to cry, not to show her vulnerability. She could only kneel down again, head down, so that people wouldn't see her eyes brimming with tears.
Xuebin and I stepped out of Xilan Palace. Before he could speak, I dismissed all the palace servants and said to him, "If you don't want your beloved Lan'er to die a violent death, then stop showering her with affection. This Xilan Palace is already the greatest favor you've shown her. You've given her such a palace and bestowed upon her such favor. Aren't you afraid she can't handle it? Don't cause me any more trouble. Do you think the women in your harem are pushovers? Do you think I can protect her just as well by staying here unharmed for two years? You know, the reason I've survived until now is partly because I've been good at protecting myself, and partly because I don't have any children. If you continue to spoil her like this, she might be pregnant. Didn't you say you wanted me to be at the forefront of the times? Look at what you've done!" I spoke with a tone of exasperation, like an older sister scolding her younger brother.
"It's a good thing you knew to push me out just now. If you had acted differently, thinking you couldn't let that woman suffer, and foolishly ran to help her, I believe you would have seen her dead tomorrow." I softened my tone and sighed softly. Why did I say such things? Wasn't I just making trouble for no reason? Maybe it was because he and Jing'er were the ones who pulled me out of trouble. Perhaps he had ulterior motives, but I am still very grateful to him.
"Let's go," Xuebin said, knowing the concern in her words. He didn't say anything presumptuous, but took her hand and treated her like a younger sister, like he would treat Jing'er. Perhaps this was the only time he could express his gratitude. Even so, he still felt indebted to her. However, he was still resentful. Zixue had given him such trouble before leaving. He wondered what time she would have left to trip him up when she saw that person. He was really looking forward to it.
Everyone, someone familiar is about to appear... Xue'er is asking for recommendations... Please add this to your favorites... Please support me. I know I update slowly, but I'll try my best. After June, I'll have more free time.
Chapter Ninety-Eight
War is about to break out, it's time to stir things up. After returning, news spread through the palace that the Emperor had made Consort Lan kneel as punishment for the sake of the Imperial Noble Consort. Shanzhu told me several versions of the story with a grin, and I smiled wryly, saying nothing. I simply told Shanzhu, "Just listen to this and move on. Tell everyone in the palace to keep their mouths shut. If any rumors spread from within the palace, I will not forgive them."
"Yes," Mangosteen replied, her playful smile vanishing, replaced by a serious expression as she withdrew.
The next day, as soon as the news of my recovery was released, the concubines from all the palaces rushed to see me. Among them, Consort Rong was the most enthusiastic. In the past few days, Xue Bin had only cared about his beloved and neglected the other concubines. Those who were not favored before were just feeling resentful, while those who were favored had to change their porcelain every day. As for the most favored ones, such as Consort Rong, she wanted Consort Lan dead from the bottom of her heart, but she had no way to do it. Now that the emperor had begun to suppress my father, she could not make a move at this time, as it would only give the emperor a reason to punish my father. Therefore, Consort Rong was smart. Although she was domineering and willful, she knew what she should and should not do. She could not be called meticulous, but if it came to methods, she was the best.
Knowing I was to see them today, I specially asked Shanzhu to bring me a silk dress that Xuebin had previously given me. I wore a bright red palace gown, its long hem trailing on the ground, my slender waist accentuated by a cloud-patterned sash. My dark hair was styled into a cloud-like bun, elaborate and elegant, adorned with tiny, sparkling pearls, as bright as snow, that shimmered in my hair, making my face appear like a lotus blossom. My clear eyes were bright and expressive, my lips a touch of rosy cherries, and a plum blossom adorned my smooth, full forehead, making me exceptionally radiant. I was elegant and noble, yet undeniably alluring. Having finished my makeup, I gracefully moved to the Xiuying Palace. Entering the palace, I didn't see the envious looks I received from others. However, I felt uncomfortable being stared at when Shanzhu helped me to my seat. Once I was seated…
"Greetings, Your Highness the Imperial Concubine!" The concubines stood up and bowed.
"Get up, sisters. What brings you here to sit with your elder sister today?" I had to be polite enough. Although I was of higher status than them and didn't need to ask, getting along with the concubines was an art. I couldn't be too arrogant, nor too humble, and I had to be able to overpower them. Compared to my helplessness two years ago, I was now very adept at it.
"Since you are well, I am here to bother you. Please don't blame me, sister." Consort Rong was the highest-ranking among the consorts, so she was the one who answered some of the questions that followed.
"Sister, you're too kind. My health is frail. Look, the weather's only been a little chilly, and I've already caught a cold. I'm so ashamed that you keep coming to visit me. I'm so afraid of catching a chill myself." See how sincere I sound? If no one had listened carefully, they would have thought I was genuinely moved. But these are all seasoned palace concubines, and they're all covering their mouths and chuckling. They're amused by Consort Rong's seemingly grand words, realizing she'd already come looking for her. Now, these words seem hypocritical. Consort Rong has also noticed, her face turning red and then pale—it's quite a sight. Unfortunately, I can't see it, but I know that what I said will anger Consort Rong. It's not that I'm looking for trouble, but it's time to get rid of Consort Rong. As for Consort Lan, I hope she understands my words and doesn't try to monopolize the Emperor's favor during this time. Perhaps then I can avoid some trouble.
"Look how polite you are, sister." Although Consort Rong was angry, she was not a brainless person. She smiled awkwardly and covered her mouth with a handkerchief, otherwise people would see how stiff her smile would look.
"Alright, enough with the polite talk, I won't say anything more, sister. Mangosteen, go to the kitchen and get the pastries that the Emperor bestowed upon you last night for the ladies to try. These were made by a chef the Emperor invited from Jiangnan. Sisters, try them, they're sweet but not cloying, a rare find in the North." You want to flatter me, is that it? I'll give you a way out and let you say it yourselves.
"Oh dear, the Emperor really dotes on my sister!" one of the Consorts teased, though it was unclear how much resentment was hidden in that smile.
“Yes, since you entered the palace, my sister, the Emperor’s favor has only increased,” another concubine chimed in, but with a hint of flattery.
I waved the handkerchief in my hand and smiled sweetly, "Sister, you're joking."
"Sister is too modest. Unlike Consort Lan of Lan Palace, she's a real scoundrel!" Consort Rong said, her tone full of hatred. She really hated it. When I was the Imperial Noble Consort, although I was favored, I didn't domineering over Xue Bin like Consort Lan did. At that time, Consort Rong was still very favored, just less so than me. So, it's understandable that she's so angry now.
"Oh, what happened? Did she upset your sister? Look at what your sister said. One must be careful with words in the harem, doesn't your sister know?" I raised my eyebrows slightly. My words were nothing, but they had a kind of intimidating power.
"Yes, sister misspoke." I heard Consort Rong stand up and knew she was bowing, so I said, "It's good that you know. Please sit down, sister."
"Your Majesty, you can't let Consort Lan have all the favor!" one of the concubines blurted out. Shanzhu once told me that this was General Wei's daughter, with a straightforward and willful personality, and she spoke her mind directly. Fortunately, she was not favored, otherwise, with that kind of personality, she probably wouldn't have survived long in the harem. Now these people were clever enough to let Consort Xi speak. Consort Xi was very favored by the Empress Dowager, and her words represented the Empress Dowager's meaning. It seems that the Empress Dowager was also dissatisfied. I wanted to facepalm. Was Xuebin enjoying himself in the arms of a woman, while I had to stand up for him here? What kind of situation was this?
"Did the Queen say the same thing?" I didn't answer, but simply passed the buck to them.
"The Empress said that it's not up to anyone to say who the Emperor favors; we just need to do our duty. She also said that if there's anything, we should come to Her Majesty," one of them answered me.
Hehe, this Empress is really clever. I'll play the bad guy, and she'll sit on the good guy. She's seen how much Xue Bin favors Consort Lan, so she doesn't dare to provoke him. Now, I'll take the lead. If we reach an agreement, everyone will be happy, including her. If we mess things up, then even if I die, it won't be their problem.
"Since the Empress says so, you should do it. How can we say what the Emperor does? You sisters can say it here, but once you leave this room, keep your mouths shut. Under no circumstances should the Emperor hear it. As for Consort Lan, it's time to talk about her." She lightly tapped the table with her fingers and glanced at them indifferently with her unseen eyes.
"Yes, elder sister, the younger sisters take their leave." All the concubines stood up, bowed, and left the palace. Even Consort Rong did not stay. Perhaps they had achieved their goal; they had only wanted to see the favored concubines fight each other.
"Your Majesty," Mangosteen called softly.
"Take all the food away, it's such a waste to waste such good food." I waved my hand wearily. Dealing with these people really keeps me on edge.
A cool breeze blew in at night, occasionally drifting into the room and making me shiver. After bathing tonight, I suddenly asked Shanzhu to bring out a white gauze dress. I had specially asked Xuebin to make it, but it was a pity I couldn't see it. From Shanzhu's description, I could tell the dress was beautiful. In modern times, I especially admire fairies in flowing white robes, like the Snow Maiden in Qin's Moon, with her white silk and ethereal clothes. It's always been my ideal. So when I learned that I was the Lord of the Moon Spirit and could use white silk as a weapon like the Snow Maiden, I was overjoyed. In the two years I spent in the Snow Kingdom, I never gave up learning the martial arts of the Moon Spirit. Now I wield them beautifully and smoothly. At least I feel I haven't let the Moon Spirit down. The white dress was made of rare silk. Although thin, it wasn't cold. After putting it on, I dismissed Shanzhu and went to the peach blossom forest where I always practiced martial arts. I found it by chance, following the scent. The trees formed a perfect enclosure, ideal for practicing my skills, making it less likely for anyone to discover me.
I stood under the tree, feeling the flowers caress my face and my clothes. The falling petals and my ethereal white robes rippled in the wind, drifting freely in the air, creating a scene like a fairy descending to earth.
Suddenly, I thought of the "Immortal Pointing the Way" dance performed by the woman in "House of Ten Sides." Inspired, I began to dance. "Dancing with my shadow, how could it be like being in the mortal world?" My movements were fluid, graceful, and elegant. I was as fluid as a flying apsara, as graceful as a flurry of light snowflakes, and as elegant as a fairy whose every step seemed to create lotus blossoms. My light and graceful dance, with its delicate steps and the resounding tinkling of bells, moved slowly like a cloud and whirled swiftly, striking tree trunks with moonlight beams, creating a melody that arose spontaneously.
The clothes fell, scattering the surrounding peach blossoms on the ground. The ethereal white veil also fell, and the lifeless eyes stared at one side, seemingly lost in thought.
A magnetic, languid voice rang out, "Xue'er."
My body stiffened, my fingers trembled slightly, and I didn't know where to put them. I could only grab my dress. How could he be here?
Chapter 99
Memories of the past, like threads, begin to entwine me again. The past, once deeply buried, resurfaces with memories I don't want to recall. I'm at a loss, my body trembling slightly, yet I don't turn around. Is it fear or dread? I don't even understand why I'm running away like this.
Xue'er's voice was a little hoarse, but even more urgent than the first time.
"Why...are you here?" I still didn't turn around, but my voice was a little stiff.
"Xue'er, is it really you?" Gui Yao was a little carried away and wanted to rush forward and hug the woman he had been searching for for two whole years.
I heard him about to come closer, so I quickly said, "Don't come any closer," and then took two steps forward to keep a safe distance.
"Why?" Gui Yao couldn't accept the woman who avoided him like the plague. For the past two years, he had expended so much effort searching for her. When he learned of her departure from the Blood Tower, he sensed something was wrong. The Blood Tower was not a place someone like her, who couldn't use martial arts, could easily leave. He suspected someone might have brought her out, but at that time, she couldn't use martial arts. He thought she might have been murdered. The thought of her death clenched his heart; he couldn't describe the pain. He frantically searched for her, but it seemed someone was always interfering with his search, making him even more afraid. If it was to protect her, that would be fine, but if it was to use information about her, that would be terrible. (In the Star Kingdom, under the Emperor...) Under her patronage, he came to the Snow Kingdom, firstly for the sake of diplomatic relations between the two countries, and secondly, and more importantly, to see if he could find her here, even just a little bit of news. Tonight, the Snow Kingdom's emperor was hosting a banquet to invite all the envoys, but disliking that kind of flattering atmosphere, he went out for a walk to clear his head. Little did he know that he had accidentally entered a peach blossom array. After searching repeatedly, he finally found the array's eye, only to see someone there. He remained vigilant, but then discovered that it was a woman dancing in the moonlight. When her face turned around, he was overjoyed to find that it was the woman he had been longing for day and night. After she stopped dancing, he gently called her name, but to his surprise, she reacted so strongly, trembling slightly in the breeze, clutching her skirt tightly with both hands, her back to him.
"Xiao Yao, please don't ask. Now, just turn around and walk out of this peach blossom forest, as if you never saw me." I know about the relationship between Jue and Gui Yao, and I also know that now that Gui Yao has found me, Jue will soon find out too. Call me cowardly or call me an escapist, but right now I just want to hide, as far away as I can. I thought I had let go of things in the past two years, but I didn't realize that it wasn't that I had let go, but that I didn't want to think about it. The wound had scabbed over, but it still left a deep mark. Now I've torn it open again, and it hurts so much that I just want to hug myself and not let anyone see my vulnerable side.
"No!" A gust of wind swept past, and I was already being held in Gui Yao's arms, her burning hot body a stark contrast to my icy one.
"Let me go!" I struggled violently. I couldn't see his expression. Yes, I couldn't see it. Like a child lying, I closed my eyes.
"No, Xue'er, it's been two years. I've been searching for you for two years. Do you know how frantically I've been looking for you these past two years?" His voice was low, and he pressed his body closer to mine, his lips pressed against the top of my head as he murmured, but I could hear the pain in his voice.
I forgot to struggle, and lowered my head. "Why bother? Just pretend I never existed in your memory."
"What does this mean?" He released me, turned me around to face him, and said, "Look at me, Xue'er."
I didn't speak. The air froze, and peach blossoms fell from the trees, just like that memory, falling away with the passing of time.
"Xue'er," he lifted my head, looking helplessly at my closed eyes, and gently stroked them with his hand, "Don't you want to see me that much?"
Her eyes flickered as his warm hand touched them, then she pushed him away. "That's right, go away. I don't want to see you."
Gui Yao now truly understands the overwhelming pain. His mother once said that love is something you can't touch, because in the end you'll only suffer. Now he understands how his mother felt when his father abandoned her. He really doesn't want to experience that heart-wrenching pain again.
He let go of her hand, turned and left, the sound of his footsteps slowly fading into the air.
I heard the footsteps stop, and I collapsed to the ground in a daze. I felt a chill on my face, and when I reached up to touch it, I found my own tears. I put my tear-stained fingers to my lips; they were bitter, so bitter. How long had it been? How long had it been since I last shed a tear? Two years ago, I cried because of Jue's ruthlessness and told myself that this was the last time. I thought I had cried all my tears. But I cried again today. Why? It turns out I've never been strong. In this harem, although I claim to be brave, I'm not. Whenever I'm reminded of the past, I cry like a child.
I opened my eyes, and the empty look of them seemed eerie in the darkness. How could I let him see such eyes? How could I? I should just present my most beautiful self to him.
Gui Yao didn't leave. He concealed his presence and quietly flew behind a peach tree. Although he was in pain, he knew that Xue'er wasn't that kind of person, so he wanted to see what was going on. However, his once lively eyes were as still as stagnant water. In the darkness, his eyes seemed to dance with the night, indistinguishable from the darkness itself. He seemed to have figured something out.
"Just because of this," I heard Gui Yao's voice again while sitting on the ground. Thinking it was a hallucination, I panicked and covered my ears tightly, trying to find some comfort for myself.
My hand was pulled down forcefully, and I heard, "Just because of this, you pushed me away. Just because of this, you had the heart to say such cruel things to me. Even if you don't love me, we're still friends. What do you take me for, anyway?"
"No, no, you don't understand." I pulled my hand away, and a red circle appeared on my wrist from the force of my struggle. I didn't care and kept backing away. I thought I must look ugly right now.
"I don't understand. How can I understand if you don't tell me? From the moment I recognized you, you weren't planning to tell me you were blind, were you?" Gui Yao was really angry. He had always cherished her as a treasure in his heart, but she never told him anything about herself. Everything seemed to be his own wishful thinking, like a clown. If he hadn't been careful just now, how would he have known she was blind, with such beautiful eyes?
"Why didn't you leave? I already told you I don't want to see you. Why won't you leave?" I was a little hysterical, my emotions were fluctuating wildly. I didn't want him to know. In this world, he had always been her friend, but she didn't want him to worry about her. Call it willfulness or pretense, it was just a small wish in her heart. Perhaps it was also a little selfish, afraid that if he knew, Jue would find out too. Feelings can't be broken off so easily. I can't be as carefree as some girls. If a guy uses you, you use him back. That feeling is truly engraved in my heart, like a habit. I don't want Jue to worry after he finds out. Perhaps I'm deceiving myself a little, but at least I'm deceiving myself a little.
"I don't care," Gui Yao stepped forward and hugged me. "I won't tell Jue, don't worry." He knew what she was worried about, so he did this to put her mind at ease.
"Waaaaah!" I'm venting my emotions right now. In the past two years, this is the only embrace that has made me feel safe. Jing'er has hugged me before, but I must still be very wary, so I didn't get any warmth from her. Now, in this embrace, I feel tired and I feel like I need to rest.
"Alright, alright," Gui Yao gently patted Zi Xue's back. Seeing her tired, closed eyes and furrowed brows, she sighed deeply. Should she continue to love her? She was already so exhausted.
A figure suddenly appeared beside "Master" Gui Yao.
"Suppress the news like you would the Snow Kingdom Emperor, distract the Blood Tower Master," Gui Yao instructed, then scooped Zi Xue up in her arms and asked, "Where does she live?"
"Yes, Master, Miss Zixue is staying in Ronghua Palace."
Gui Yao frowned slightly after hearing this, but said nothing. He just looked at the woman in his arms with tenderness and affection in his eyes before flying away.
The figure shook its head as it looked at its master's shadow, and then flew away.
Flower is not flower, mist is not mist. It comes at midnight, departs at dawn. Its arrival is like a fleeting spring dream, its departure like morning clouds, leaving no trace.