"Yuanyuan..." Third Aunt looked into my eyes and said, "I didn't want to tell you these things, but you'll find out eventually. Do you know why Secretary Ding was arrested?"
"Because he accepted bribes! Everyone in the city knows."
Third Aunt nodded. "Yes, everyone in the hospital knows he's been taking bribes, but who can bring him down? He's deeply entrenched; if you're not careful, you might not only fail to bring him down, but you could also get yourself into trouble."
"Then this time... this time..." Suddenly, he remembered that Qu Ling had been collecting information on infrastructure projects. His trip to N City was to pick up materials from the design company that had contracted to design three school buildings in the infrastructure project. Could it be him?
"It's Qu Ling." Third Aunt poured water into the corn pot and put it on the induction cooker to simmer. "No one expected that Secretary Ding would be defeated by Qu Ling, who is half a year younger than him."
"It really is him..." My feelings suddenly became complicated, an indescribable mix of emotions churning within me. I had a feeling that things were far more complex than they appeared. Forcing myself to suppress my emotions, I tried to find out more inside information from Third Aunt.
"Third Aunt, how could Qu Ling bring down Secretary Ding all by himself? Does he have someone else in the academy helping him?"
"Need I say more? I don't know when he started to work his way up to the people around Secretary Ding one by one, and when Old Ding finally got into trouble, these people didn't hesitate to kick him when he was down."
"What about my third uncle? He has always remained neutral in the academy and never joined any factions. Did he not play any role in this matter at all?"
"How could that be!" Third Aunt glared at me sideways. "Without your Third Uncle, Qu Ling wouldn't be able to bring down Old Ding right now!"
"Was it my third uncle who helped him?"
"Those so-called 'kicking someone when they're down' only jumped out after Old Ding got into trouble. Qu Ling is a shrewd man. From the very beginning, he was determined to have your third uncle help him. He knew that your third uncle had a lot of evidence in his hands. Your third uncle said that he had to admire the depth of this boy's mind."
I sat blankly under the west window. The cabbage soup in my bowl had gone cold, and the cooled lard had condensed into specks of white foam on the surface. I felt nauseous and covered my mouth as I ran to the bathroom and dry-heaved in front of the sink.
"Yuanyuan! Are you alright?" Third Aunt asked worriedly as she followed her in.
"It's nothing! I just choked a little." I forced a smile at my aunt and said, "I haven't eaten meat for several days, and I'm not used to the taste of oil."
"It's not that you shouldn't eat meat, it's just that you should eat it in moderation." Third Aunt poured me a cup of hot water and pulled me back to the rest room.
"Third Aunt, you know Qu Ling is a deep and calculating person, but you..." Halfway there, I grabbed my third aunt's hand and asked, "Why do you still approve of my marriage to him?"
Third Aunt gave me a deep look and said, "These are two different things. A man with cunning isn't necessarily a bad man. Just because he uses some scheming in his career doesn't mean he's not a good husband. On the contrary, if someone is useless and incompetent in his career, it's questionable how much responsibility he can shoulder for his family."
“Yuanyuan, don’t overthink it. To be honest, your third uncle isn’t someone to be trifled with either, but marrying him was the best thing I ever did in my life. He’s a stern tiger at school, but he’s my good husband at home. I believe Qu Ling will love you dearly, and you won’t suffer with him.” My third aunt gently stroked my hair, comforting me.
I nodded blankly and slowly finished the water in the cup.
"Third Aunt, I have class this afternoon, so I'm going back to my office first." My mind was in turmoil, and I wanted to go for a walk, so I got up to say goodbye.
"Okay. Remember to eat this apple during break." My aunt stuffed a big red apple into my backpack.
"Third Aunt..." I turned back to her before leaving and asked, "If Third Uncle comes home tonight, remember to call me. I need to talk to him."
"Okay." Third Aunt nodded to me.
****
As the end of the semester approaches, students sit in twos and threes on the playground during lunch break to study. I sit on the high stands of the open-air stadium, looking down at the pale yellow withered grass, where youthful boys and girls are pure white.
My mind was a jumbled mess, like a fog before clarity, as if a little more time would allow the answers to become clear. This feeling both startled and frightened me.
My phone was playing "Happiness Bubbles" in my pocket. That was the ringtone I set especially for Qu Ling, a song that only plays when he calls.
The bell kept ringing, and the song of happiness sang over and over again, but I just stared at the scattered clouds in the sky, oblivious to it all.
After a long time, the ringing finally stopped. I took my phone out of my pocket, and the screen showed four missed calls, all from Qu Ling.
I tried to stay focused during the afternoon classes, but I was preoccupied and couldn't concentrate.
After class ended and I returned to the office, Dingding sat in my seat and smiled, "You're finally back. You didn't forget what you promised me, did you?"
"Huh? What's up?"
"Su Yuanyuan! Stop pretending!" Dingding pinched me playfully. "You promised to treat me to a big meal at Honglemen today! What? Trying to renege on your promise?"
"No way, let's go!"
"Yay!" Dingding laughed, slung her bag over her shoulder, and pulled me out the door.
*****
Dingding and I were both big eaters, but I gained weight easily, while she never gained weight no matter how much she ate.
I thanked Dingding for covering my class, so I gave her the menu and let her order whatever she liked. Dingding didn't hesitate and ordered the signature roasted char siu, roast goose with plum sauce, salted bone and cabbage soup, pineapple mixed rice, dry-fried green beans, sizzling sea bass, cola spare ribs, and braised beef ribs with potatoes, filling the table with food.
Hong Le Men's dishes live up to their reputation; even a simple dish like dry-fried green beans tastes different from those in ordinary restaurants.
At least that's what Dingding said. As for me, all those dishes tasted the same.
As they got into the swing of things, Dingding said, "Yuanyuan, how about we have a couple of drinks too? What do you say?"
"Okay!" I usually dislike alcohol, but for some reason I suddenly wanted to have a couple of drinks.
Dingding asked for two bottles of Budweiser and poured them into a clear glass for me. The bright yellow liquid was bubbling, seemingly about to overflow. But it didn't. The bubbles eventually dissipated slowly into the air.
"Yuanyuan! Do you know what? I was so wrong when I told you that Director Zhou was Secretary Ding's man!" Dingding took a sip of her ice-cold beer, leaned over the middle of the table, and said mysteriously, "Him? He turned out to have switched sides a long time ago and is now Dean Qu's man! I heard he did a great job in this anti-Ding movement and is now hoping for a promotion!"
Thump—the soup spoon in my hand fell onto the table, and the chaos in my mind suddenly cracked open, finally revealing the stone that I had always been afraid to see.
"While Dean Su is ostensibly in charge of things at the college, Dean Qu actually holds the real power! He's going to a meeting in the province this time, and when he comes back, he'll probably be promoted to Party Secretary, becoming the top leader! Tsk tsk! It's unbelievable that such a young and handsome guy would be so cunning! It really proves that saying!" Ding Ding clicked her tongue and said, "The new generation surpasses the old, and the old generation dies on the beach!"
With trembling hands, I picked up the porcelain spoon that had fallen on the table, forced a smile, and said, "Really? He did so much without anyone noticing... That's impressive..."
The Yangtze River's waves surge and recede, each wave crashing onto the shore. And what about me? What am I? Am I merely a bubble or a drop of water used by the waves that push the previous ones forward?
I grabbed the wine glass on the table and gulped down the entire glass of wine in one go. The slightly bitter liquid flowed down my throat, not into my stomach, but into my heart. It was unbearably bitter.