I didn't think much of it, but when I got to the pawnshop, I found Jing Ke playing with Zhao Da Ye's second son, Zhao Bai Lian. As soon as Jing Ke saw me, he grinned foolishly. I was horrified and asked him what was wrong, because I realized that his smile was full of cunning.
Jing Ke said to me mysteriously, "A pretty girl came looking for you just now, but I told her you weren't here and sent her away."
I said, "And then?"
Jing Ke said smugly, "I didn't tell Baozi..."
My five-man group is still the closest to me! I hugged Jing Ke tightly, tears streaming down my face, and said, "Brother Jing, you finally did something good!" But then I immediately wondered, "A pretty girl? What did she say?"
"She asked you to meet her at a bar at 10 p.m. tonight."
Pretty girls, 10 pm, a bar... how could this not make my blood boil and my mind race? I coaxed, "What kind of bar?"
Jing Ke: "Hehe, I forgot—"
Zhao Bailian suddenly shouted, "There's murderous intent!"
It's normal to have a murderous aura; I really want to smash my head against Jing Ke's head and die!
I entered the room dejectedly and found Li Shishi fiddling with my computer again. This time, she didn't flinch when she saw me come in, and continued typing away. In front of her was a large Wubi input method chart, and next to her was a book titled "Introduction to Computer Operation." I asked her what she was doing, and she replied while busy, "Don't bother me, I'm preparing my lesson."
I went over and saw on the screen: Lesson One, Who Am I? Then came a preface, divided into paragraphs: In specific circumstances, there are always some people who change the times. These people are few and far between at the time, but looking at the long river of history, they present a magnificent list. And we, perhaps, are on that list…
Li Shishi turned slightly to show me and said, "Is this writing okay?"
I said, "It would be even better if it were a little whiter."
Li Shishi turned up the screen brightness a little and turned back to ask for my opinion. I chuckled and said, "That's not what I meant—I meant you could write something like this: 'Today, everyone here is quite remarkable. Although we're not from the same dynasty, we were all famous figures in our time. Let's start with the first student in the first row, and I'll tell you all about what you did back then and its impact on the future. This will help everyone better understand who you are and what you do...'"
Li Shishi's eyes lit up: "Cousin, what you said is so profound yet so simple. You are much better than Confucius and Han Yu. I think you should teach this course from now on."
I said embarrassedly, "Stop joking. Apart from Deng Tu Zi and Hu Han San, I only know a limited number of historical figures, cousin."
Who is Hu Hansan?
"Uh... he's a persistent, wicked boss who's returned home in triumph multiple times."
"But I have no knowledge of anything after the Southern Song Dynasty. I only read up to the establishment of the Yuan capital in my history books."
"Don't rush. Rome took several days to build, so look at as much as you can. I'll teach you how to use Baidu later. By the way, as a teacher, you have to be objective and not biased. Wanyan Aguda and Kublai Khan are both in your class now, so you can't show favoritism."
Li Shishi smiled calmly: "I've long considered myself a modern person. Fighting, killing, grudges and affections are all your men's business. I can't tolerate so much."
Speaking of grudges, I remember there's a trap waiting for me tonight. Sigh, if only Bangzi's bodyguard, Fan Kuai, were here. I would never go alone. Even if I went, there's no guarantee a fight would break out, but what if it did?
Taking Xiang Yu along would be absolutely safe. He often single-handedly roamed through massive enemy lines; even without exaggeration, he'd have killed at least a company's worth of men. However, bringing Xiang Yu along could also backfire. The enemy would see him arriving with such a large figure without having done anything—wouldn't that be a show of force? Besides, Xiang Yu has a bad temper. If a battle breaks out, they'll have at least ten or eight dead before they can face their people in Jiangdong. No way.
Qin Shi Huang and Liu Bang are out of the question; even bringing steamed buns would be more effective than them.
Li Shishi is clever and charming, and bringing her along would definitely enhance one's image. To put it bluntly, the other party is just a bunch of thugs recruiting students, not gangsters. Even if things turn sour, they probably wouldn't dare to do anything outrageous. The problem is, now is not the time to worry about saving face, so we can rule them out.
After much thought, Jing Ke seemed the only suitable candidate, even though he might have ruined something for me and I hate him for it. Jing Ke hasn't shown his skills yet, so I'm a little unsure of himself, but he's definitely bold—well, he's a bit dim-witted.
After we finished eating, I pulled Jing Ke aside and quietly asked him, "Kezi, are you still willing to risk your life?"
Jing Ke suddenly displayed a caution inconsistent with his intelligence: "Whom do I serve?"
I tentatively suggested, "For example, give me..."
Jing Ke resolutely said, "I am willing to risk my life for Prince Dan..."
My heart sank. He's no match for Prince Dan. How did Prince Dan treat Jing Ke back then? Ersha loved the sound of gold falling into water, and Prince Dan, without a word, had a handful of gold thrown into the water (is that where the saying "you can hear the sound when you throw it in the water" comes from?); Ersha heard that the liver of a fine horse was delicious, and Prince Dan went to great lengths to find it for him (friendly reminder: horse liver is poisonous, do not eat it); once, Ersha was listening to light music and saw that the girl playing the piano had very white hands, so he said, "Nice hands, huh?" That brat Prince Dan actually chopped off the girl's hand, put it in a box, and gave it to Ersha.
How did I treat Ersha? I lectured him like a grandson over a few dollars' worth of batteries. You call him stupid? Stupid people are more direct: if you want him to work for me, you'd better come on over.
Unexpectedly, Jing Ke suddenly patted my shoulder: "I'd risk my life for him—" he said, then flashed an angelic, idiotic smile, "let alone you!"
This time, my eyes really welled up with tears. Just because of what he said, I wouldn't hate him even if he ruined a good thing that hadn't even started yet, or even if I stripped a beautiful girl naked and threw her on the bed and he barged in with the inspection team.
Chapter Forty-Nine: Encountering the "Underworld"
I said I'd take Jing Ke out for a stroll, but Baozi and the others didn't pay any attention. No one suspected I could lead an idiot out to do bad things.
When we arrived at the entrance of "Reverse Time," we saw many young men wearing tank tops smoking and loitering around. Many of them had ribbonfish tattoos on their backs, and some had long objects wrapped in their clothes tucked under their armpits.
I asked Jing Ke, "They're all coming for us, aren't you afraid?"
Ersha wasn't listening to anything I was saying; he was just fiddling with his transistor radio. The signal was probably bad, because it was making a crackling sound. I immediately realized that Ersha probably didn't have any fear receptors. Back then, there were actually two assassins who tried to kill Fatty Ying. The other one, Qin Wuyang, had killed someone when he was only 12. He was paralyzed with fear in Xianyang Palace first, which is why Ersha could only chase Fatty Ying around the pillars in the end. This involves a geometric problem: if Qin Wuyang hadn't been paralyzed, even if he had remained stationary at a point in the circle, Fatty Ying wouldn't have been able to escape.
One of the thugs stepped forward and stared at me. He looked familiar, and before I could blurt out his name, he preemptively said, "Aren't you Qiangzi? Do you remember me?"
"Aren't you Bai Zhu? We've been childhood friends. I haven't seen you since you moved!"
Bai Zhu was my childhood friend who used to live in a bungalow, but I had many friends back then, so I didn't hang out with Bai Zhu much.
The white pig said shyly, "Don't call me by my nickname, just call me Yinzhu. What are you doing now?"
"You're working for someone else, what about you?"
"Hey, just wandering around aimlessly, and today I found a good job. Someone paid me 50 yuan to stand here." As he spoke, Bai Zhu pulled open the clothes on the long bag tucked under his arm, revealing a pack of cigarettes. Bai Zhu cautiously looked back and said, "He even gave me a pack of cigarettes. Take two packs and smoke them." I was about to refuse when Bai Zhu quickly stuffed two packs of Honghe cigarettes into my pocket, saying, "Take them quickly, don't let Bai Zhu show off."
I could only say, "Thanks, you go ahead with your work, I'll treat you to a drink later when I have time."
"Reverse Time" is one of the best bars around here. It has two floors; the downstairs is a dance hall and casual seating, while the upstairs has private rooms. I went upstairs as they told me to and entered room number 3. I was delighted as soon as I stepped inside.
I saw seven or eight men, all of whom were not young, sitting around the table, leaving one empty seat. Each of them had a cup of tea in front of them, looking like they were about to have a serious talk. The most amusing thing was that almost every one of them had two men standing behind them, wearing wrinkled black suits, their hands covered in their crotches. The private room was already dark, and they were wearing sunglasses. I noticed that one of them was wearing "Big Bowen" brand shoes.
I didn't want to ruin the solemn atmosphere they were trying so hard to create, but I just couldn't help laughing. I threw the two boxes of "Honghe" cigarettes on the table and kept gesturing to the young people standing behind me: "Sit down, everyone. Stop pretending to be gangsters—you, wear a suit, not a floral shirt."