Even a starved camel is bigger than a horse. The sales office of Qingshui Jiayuan occupies an entire floor. As soon as you enter, you can see a model on a table the size of a basketball court. Several houses are surrounded by a large area of green velvet. Not far away, there are several large piles of pebbles, indicating that the houses are in the middle of the lawn and there are artificial hills next to them.
The sales office had huge, bright floor-to-ceiling windows lined with bamboo chairs and glass tables for customers to rest, some even decorated with candy. There were seven or eight couples in the lobby looking at the properties. At this time of year, most people looking at properties are actually ordinary citizens looking for bargains, but judging from their critical and demanding manner, they seemed more like Singaporeans looking to invest.
Baozi carried a kettle, and the cleaver clattered inside as we entered the hall.
Normally, customers like us would be a neglected group with few people caring for us, but in this extraordinary time, Qingshui Jiayuan has enough staff to receive every visitor.
A pretty saleswoman greeted us warmly. Instead of rushing us to see the apartments, she introduced herself first, then chatted with me for a few minutes. She quickly gauged our interest; knowing that Baozi was the one taking the lion's share of the three of us, she stayed close to him, occasionally making small talk. I couldn't help but admire the professionalism of salespeople these days. It seems my grand vision of selling umbrellas in the Sahara is not far from becoming a reality.
Baozi, hands behind her back, carrying a kettle, circled the model, looking at it with interest. I think she was quite interested because the model was very realistic. Through casual conversation, the saleswoman had a general understanding of our situation. Seeing that Baozi's eyes kept lingering on the small, affordable apartments, she guessed that we were short of money. With a professional smile, she said, "Since you two don't have children yet, this small apartment is perfect for you to enjoy the intimacy of your time together, and it also avoids the problem of spending too much time cleaning the apartment because you're busy with work."
Li Shishi asked playfully, "What if we have children later?"
The saleswoman glanced back at her, her eyes full of curiosity. She probably didn't understand the relationship between the three of us. However, Li Shishi's question was clearly something she had anticipated. The saleswoman calmly replied, "Now each family only has one child, and our smallest apartment is a two-bedroom unit. Even if the children grow up, it won't affect anyone."
Li Shishi chuckled and asked, "What if there are two children?" Seeing the saleswoman's confident demeanor, Li Shishi quickly added, "The children will be a boy and a girl."
The saleswoman was being led by the nose and could only manage a weak answer: "The boy sleeps with his father, and the girl with..." She trailed off, realizing her answer was unreliable, and her voice trailed off. At that moment, Baozi turned and glared at Li Shishi, then told the saleswoman, "Don't pay her any attention." Li Shishi stuck her tongue out at me.
I kept stealing glances at the small villa next door, a red and white striped building, a mailbox standing by the lawn, a garage with a sensor door, and even a doghouse next to the house...
Imagine this: I'm slowly driving into my garage, my dog wagging its tail to welcome me. As soon as I enter my spacious, bright living room, I loosen my tie and toss it on the coat rack. Then, Baozi and I lie on the floor reading. We're reading Playboy, we're reading the Hong Kong edition of Playboy, we're reading…
My curiosity got the better of me, and I finally couldn't resist asking, "How much is that?"
The saleswoman didn't even glance at me, casually saying "1.8 million" before continuing to discuss the 70-square-meter apartment on the sixth floor with Baozi. She didn't mean to look down on me; she completely ignored my existence, assuming I was just curious.
Baozi found a house she liked that cost over 180,000 yuan. Including property management fees and winter expenses, it came to about 200,000 yuan, which was exactly all the savings our two families had. Baozi was completely swayed by the saleswoman and began to dream endlessly of the happy life she would have after owning her own house.
"Look, we have a large lawn where you can let your children run around. We're also building a large fitness area here. After dinner, you and your husband can stroll there and watch the sunset. You can sit on the swings and let your husband swing you high up..."
As she spoke, the saleswoman's eyes became glazed over, as if she were sitting on a swing and her eyes were stung by the glow of the setting sun. Her arms began to move gracefully. If I were Zhang Yimou, she would definitely be famous!
Li Shishi watched her performance with a smile, her hands behind her back. It seemed that trying to bewitch her was second only to bewitching me.
Baozi was so excited her face turned red, and she asked me, "What do you think?" I don't even know who was it that said they would never buy a house.
I smiled noncommittally. Seeing victory in sight, the saleswoman added fuel to the fire: "Besides, our community is fully enclosed. Imagine, after a long day at work, returning to your secluded love nest, oblivious to the world, only..."
I finally couldn't help but interrupt her and said, "Miss, with your persuasive skills, you could easily create another organization like the White Lotus Cult."
The saleswoman suddenly blushed: "How did you know my name is White Lotus?"
Baozi suddenly shoved the kettle into my hand, said "I'm going to the toilet," and hurriedly ran off. She seemed genuinely excited. Li Shishi followed her, took a couple of steps, then suddenly turned back and pointed to the small villa: "I think that one's nice, hehe." And she left too.
Once things calmed down, I asked Bai Lianhua, "Does 1.8 million include the garage and such?"
Bai Lianhua was a little confused and said, "Oh, right, it can park two cars—is this what you want?" Her tone was full of distrust. She probably had never seen a millionaire who would buy a teapot and carry it all the way home.
I walked around to the model and looked down at it carefully. Bai Lianhua pointed at Baozi's back and stammered, "But..." She clearly couldn't understand how a customer who would carefully consider even buying a 70-square-meter affordable apartment could suddenly have the idea of buying a villa.
Suddenly, a mischievous thought crossed my mind, and I joked with her, "Do you know what the relationship is between those two women just now?"
"...They seem to be sisters, but they look so...different."
I laughed and said, "Calling us sisters isn't wrong. Do you want to make money? If you want to make money, you have to take back everything you just said and make the boss give up on that idea. Then I can buy the villa through your hands."
Bai Lianhua was even more confused. I lowered my voice and whispered mysteriously in her ear, "They're not sisters by blood..."
Bai Lianhua finally understood, her face turning bright red as she stammered, "You...you..." After a long pause, she finally managed to utter a ridiculous statement, "You're really something!" Her attitude towards me completely changed afterward, transforming from a professional perfunctory attitude to genuinely respectful one. It seems that taking two women shopping is quite different from riding two bicycles.
A man who can keep two women together in a luxurious house is certainly capable. It's said that China will have 60 million bachelors in a few years; this is not only due to the patriarchal attitudes of the past few years, but also related to some men taking more than their share. 60 million bachelors—what a huge market! The porn industry is about to experience a golden age!
"Then how can I help you?"
"In a little while, you'll do your best to convince the boss—the ugly one—to stop wanting to buy the house. That'll be a success. As for the villa, we'll do it privately. With your eloquence, it shouldn't be difficult—I have faith in you."
Bai Lianhua nodded and said resolutely, "Don't worry, after three turning points, I guarantee that even if your first wife has to pay me, she won't want it anymore."
I gave Bai Lianhua my business card because I genuinely liked that 1.8 million yuan house; during the earthquake, its value for money was truly exceptional. My mischief was also purposeful; seeing that the silly girl was completely bewildered by Bai Lianhua's persuasion, given her personality, it wasn't impossible for her to use all her savings to buy that sixth-floor apartment.
After everything was arranged, Baozi and the others came out. Baozi said excitedly, "Go on, what other benefits are there?"
Bai Lianhua remained all smiles, showing no sign of a change in attitude: "The 6th floor apartment you want has another advantage in the summer: mosquitoes can't get in..." I tried to give her a meaningful look, but she acted as if she didn't see it. Could it be that I've run into a salesperson with an exceptionally strong sense of social morality?
Baozi rubbed his hands together and said, "Yeah, I didn't even think of that."
"However..." Here it comes, the first turning point! "You'd better not open the windows either, because there's a big chimney less than 200 meters from your house. The chemical dust pollution is quite serious now, and if you inhale too much, you can easily get a respiratory infection. Of course, that's the mild case." There was no hint of intimidation from the white lotus flower; instead, she seemed very concerned.
Baozi frowned and said, "How can this be? Do you really have the lawn and fitness area you mentioned?"
“Really…” This time I listened calmly, knowing that the second twist was about to come, and sure enough: “However, we can’t guarantee that they will survive after our developers leave. And I must remind you to be careful when you walk, there are more people keeping dogs in the city now, and there is a lot of dog poop in the lawn.”
I said at the right moment, "It's okay, we can walk across the grass on stilts."
Baozi glared at me, then hesitated and said, "I think we should hold off on buying it for now?"
I said, "Don't you want to sit on the swing and watch the sunset?"
White Lotus: "Oh, well... actually, we've already planned to build a parking lot there."
Baozi turned and left. I only said to Bai Lianhua after I saw her leave, "Well done!"
Bai Lianhua smiled and said, "Just telling the truth, but our villa is really nice..." She then gave me a flirtatious wink.
Then I strode onto the motorcycle and calmly told Baozi, "Hold on tight!" After handing the water bottle to Li Shishi in the sidecar, Baozi clung to my back. I revved the engine, and black smoke billowed out. We sped away to the astonishment of all the staff at the Qingshui Jiayuan sales office.