"You didn't ask that guy either?"
"He was already drunk when he arrived, and then he drank several more bowls of wine. No one could wake him up."
I sighed and walked up to the man, only to find that he was a thin old man with gray hair tied in a small bun. His clothes didn't indicate which dynasty he belonged to; they had probably been changed. I patted his shoulder, but there was no response. Zhu Gui said, "It's no use, I've tried."
I grabbed a bottle of chilled mineral water, unscrewed it, and was about to splash it at him when Zhu Gui said, "Have you thought this through? If this guy is Lian Po, you're in trouble. Even if he's Huang Gai or Huang Zhong, I can't control him."
I was sweating profusely and said, "How about we call Lin Chong and Li Kui over so I can splash them again? Which of the older military generals loves to drink the most?"
Zhu Gui said with a grin, "Who knows, he might be a poet. Let's take a gamble."
This is a gamble with one's life! Could this person be the founder of Drunken Fist?
I splashed some mineral water into my hand, nervously slapped it on his head, then jumped more than two meters away to observe what would happen.
The old man, jolted by the cold water, slowly raised his head. His face was flushed crimson, as if it were about to bleed, and he looked around blankly, reeking of alcohol. I quickly seized the opportunity to ask, "Sir, what is your surname?"
The old man, whether he understood what I was saying or not, sighed loudly, "Sigh..." and collapsed onto the table before he could finish his sentence.
“Sighing? Did such a person even exist in history?” I asked Zhu Gui, who shrugged.
At this moment, Du Xing's young female apprentice chimed in, "Doesn't this sound like an ancient exclamation?"
"Are you sure there isn't a martial arts master named Yixuxi?"
The boy next to her pointed at her and said, "She's the most beautiful girl in our Chinese department."
I was somewhat relieved; it seemed this old man was probably a scholar. I mustered my courage and splashed a bottle of ice water on him. The old man jolted awake, sat bolt upright, and angrily proclaimed, "My dappled horse, my thousand-gold fur coat—call the boy to exchange them for fine wine, to drown our eternal sorrows together!"
I grabbed the most beautiful girl in our department: "What is he saying?"
"It's a poem called 'Bring in the Wine'."
Who wrote it?
"You don't even know this? Li Bai, the poet I admire most."
I was also quite surprised. I approached the old man and asked in a low voice, "Are you Li Bai?"
The old man, completely unaware of his surroundings, stared blankly at my question for a long time before looking at me with bleary, drunken eyes and stammering, "You... how did you know?"
Chapter Seventy-Five: The Vast Land
Li Bai! I asked Zhu Gui for a towel to wipe the sweat from my brow, a testament to Li Bai's unwavering spirit. Though I am unlearned, I know of Li Bai's brilliance, a figure who has resonated throughout history. A certain poet once said, "After Li Bai, there will be no more poets..."
The old man's poems are indeed excellent, like "Goose, goose, goose, white feathers floating on green water"... uh, that was written by Luo Binwang. And then there's "Sweat drips onto the soil beneath the crops," oh, that was written by Li Shen.
Anyway, it's well written.
After wiping my sweat, I handed the towel to Li Bai and cautiously asked, "Where did you come from?"
Li Bai, wiping the water from his head, mumbled, "Where...am I?" He then realized he was in a chaotic, chaotic place. Laser lights shone down, casting countless golden rays, and men and women on the dance floor released their remaining energy, their bodies convulsing, their expressions ferocious, all while disco music roared from all directions: "Nao nao, nao nao nao nao, nao nao nao nao—lonely, lonely, lonely..."
Li Bai regained some clarity and said with a sigh of relief, "Finally, I've arrived at hell."
I said dejectedly, "You should say you've already come out. Do you remember when and where you were last in the human world?"
"...Xuancheng, I remember I was drinking when two men came and chained me up. I thought it was about Li Lin (the rebel king, to whom Li Bai had served), but they said I was dead—isn't that like going to hell?"
I was speechless for a long time. It seemed that this place had given Li Bai a very bad first impression. Just as I was about to explain, Li Bai suddenly spotted Du Xing, who had just come onto the stage, pointed at him, and said, "Alas! There are such ugly ghosts."
...
After he had settled into his surroundings for a while, I asked loudly, "Do you remember if you signed any documents after those two people took you there?"
"...I vaguely remember signing it. It said something about the immortal realm and a year. I thought to myself, now that I'm here, I'm at their mercy. I guess I should just sign a note." After wiping himself dry, Li Bai started speaking like a normal person.
I said happily, "Signing is the right thing to do. This isn't hell, it's paradise! You can stay here for a year!" I wasn't trying to lie to him; I couldn't explain it to him anyway, so I might as well let him think he'd already ascended to heaven. Who wants to stay in hell?
Li Bai waved his hand and said, "Don't lie to me."
I pulled over the most beautiful girl in the Chinese department, pointed to her slender, fair waist, and said, "Are there such pretty girls in hell?"
Li Bai glanced at the most beautiful girl in his department, shook his head, and said, "Her smile is charming, her eyes are bright and beautiful."
I saw the most beautiful girl in the department blush and asked her, "What did he say? Did he harass you?"
The most beautiful girl in the department glared at me, then sat down next to Li Bai and said, "From what you just said, it seems you support the theory that Li Bai died drunk in Xuancheng. Why don't you agree with the latter two theories?"
Li Bai was taken aback: "What about the latter two?"
"It's hard for you to like Li Bai so much, yet you don't even know the three legends about his death? One of the latter two is that he died of illness in Dangtu, and the other is that he was drunk and saw the moon reflected in the water, so he jumped in to grab it—" The department's most beautiful girl blushed. "I like the last one, it's so romantic."
Li Bai glanced at her and said, "I'm not a monkey."
So the story of the monkey trying to catch the moon existed in the Tang Dynasty?
The most beautiful girl in the department scolded, "Can't you be serious? I won't allow you to mock my idol."
I quickly whispered to the most beautiful girl in the department, "It's probably because he's drunk. I have a friend who says he's a koala when he's drunk, and he stays on the clothes rack all night."
The most beautiful girl in the department suddenly realized something, moved closer to Li Bai, and said with a smile, "Li Bai, let me ask you, which of your works are you most satisfied with—you're not allowed to say the next one!"
Li Bai smacked his lips and said, "Is there any wine? I haven't had any wine for half an hour, have I?"
The most beautiful girl in the department said, "If you tell me, I'll buy you a drink." This is going to be interesting! I quickly told Zhu Gui, who was serving wine to Li Bai, to stay away. I wasn't worried at all that the most beautiful girl would see through my act, because she seemed perfectly normal.
Li Bai began to gather the bottoms of the stack of bowls together, and said calmly, "Even the current emperor cannot threaten me."