Baozi hesitated for a moment, then finally said haltingly, "After we get married, will Da Ge and the others leave?"
My heart skipped a beat: "Do you want them to leave?"
Baozi sighed and said, "Of course I don't want that. I think we're all family, and it's fine as it is." Since Li Shishi started filming, Baozi hasn't had to worry about the cost of food. But even she, in her simple-mindedness, knows that all good things must come to an end. Even if I have enough rooms in my villa for them, I can't keep them after a year.
Thinking about this, I felt a little sad and said, "It's okay, friends are for life, we can keep in touch in the future."
Why would I associate with them?
Baozi stopped the conversation and said to me, "If you really have a secret stash of money, shouldn't you replace the sofa first?"
I sat on the sofa and wiggled my hips, making the sofa creak loudly. "Don't worry about that. All the furniture is already taken care of."
"Really? Could you please stop shaking that sofa? It's making me feel... kind of uncomfortable."
"Creak, creak..." I shook it vigorously, chuckling, "Why don't you come over and we shake it together?" After Liu Bang's mysterious disappearance and Li Shishi's filming, Wu Sangui and Hua Mulan took over, forming a new group of five with the old members. Baozi and I have been under constant surveillance for a long time, and even occasional intimacy feels like an affair. Now is the perfect opportunity.
Baozi laughed and said, "I'm a bride now, so it's best if we see each other as little as possible before I'm officially married."
I scoffed. "We've been sleeping in the same bed for two years, and you're still talking about a new bride?" I said. "How about we take some precautions? Then we'll both have two sons!"
Baozi: "Pah!"
I continued, "If they're all twins, then there are four. If they're all quintuplets, wow, that's incredible! A whole football team! They'd be brothers fighting side by side. Let them win the World Cup, so we don't have to worry about the Chinese national football team."
Baozi: "I'll punish you to death!"
"No way. Our sons will definitely stay far away from that brat Li Jingshui and won't learn to kick people in the groin."
"...I mean, if you have more children than allowed, the country will punish you severely! You think you can kick someone in the groin on the football field?"
"Let them punish me, I have plenty of money. Besides, my Xiao Qiang is such a superior breed that his offspring are all elites. The country should just fund a whole room full of Viagra for me, so I can do nothing but make babies!"
Baozi threw a cucumber butt at him: "How about I give birth to a marathon with 10,000 participants, and everyone from the gold medalist to the 10,000th place finisher will be a member of the Xiao family!"
I stroked my chin and said, "It's more realistic to have a whole football team of kids, from goalkeeper to striker, they'll all be my sons."
...
When the rice was almost cooked, Baozi said, "Call Big Guy and ask why he's not back yet."
I took out my phone and called Xiang Yu, but the car wasn't at the door. I guessed he had taken his group of five out for a stroll.
Mulan answered the phone. I asked where they were, and she said, "Lu Bu has found the horse, and Brother Xiang is about to have a final battle with him."
I jumped to my feet, and meeting Baozi's curious gaze, I could only whisper, "When does it start?"
"We just arrived at the usual spot. Brother Xiang is walking his horse, but Lü Bu hasn't arrived yet."
I stamped my foot in frustration. Luckily, the duel hadn't started yet. I covered the phone and said, "I'll be there in a bit."
Xiang Yu and his men are getting increasingly outrageous; they didn't even tell me about something this big. Even that pale-faced Zhao, knowing Wu Sangui was about to go berserk and smash the chess pieces, only cared about hiding his face and didn't bother to warn anyone. I still have red marks on my forehead from being pressed against the Go stones.
Baozi, while serving the dishes, asked, "Where are they?"
I said, "They're eating out, don't worry about it."
Baozi said "Oh," and looked at me strangely, saying, "What are you standing there for? Wash your hands and eat."
I'm so anxious right now, I can't even eat.
But even in this urgent situation, there's nothing I can do. If I tell Baozi the truth—that I'm going to find Xiang Yu and the others—there's no reason not to take her with me. Then Baozi will see her ancestor riding a horse, fighting a fat man...
Now, the steaming hot food is on the table, and any excuse seems weak. Even if I put on Superman's underwear, Spider-Man's shirt, drove Batman's flashy car, and pulled out a UN-authorized document (number 00000001) saying I was going to save the world, Baozi would definitely say: "Eat first, then go."
I twisted and turned in my chair, then suddenly rushed into the kitchen and pulled Baozi, who was cooking the last dish, onto the dining table. Baozi exclaimed, "It's not cooked yet!" I turned off the stove, pressed her down into the chair opposite me, took out the half-bottle of fine red wine that Jin Shaoyan and I had drunk together last time from the refrigerator, and filled two wine glasses.
Baozi, seeing me acting strangely, laughed and said, "What's wrong with you?"
I raised my glass and said gently, "It's rare for us to have some alone time together, cheers."
We drank it all in one gulp. Baozi smiled faintly, a blush rising on her cheeks. Every woman longs for romance, regardless of whether she appears cold or carefree on the surface. We'd never created a similar atmosphere before; for birthdays, we'd just go to a dumpling restaurant and call it a day.
I poured more wine, took Baozi's hand, and said, "These past two years... you've worked so hard." Now, as I'm about to leave, I'll make a strong, powerful arm-raising gesture—it's like a line from an advertisement. Although I learned it from TV, I said it with genuine feeling. Thinking about Baozi these past two years, working during the day and cooking at night, she's treated me like a pampered old lady without any recognition or status. What I'm most grateful for is her taking care of the five of us. If it were an average girl, she would have given up long ago.
Baozi couldn't stand such words. She awkwardly drank the wine in her glass, not knowing what to say for a long time.
I held her hand and said, "I promise I'll treat you well from now on, work hard, and then, like in fairy tales: Xiaoqiang and Baozi lived happily ever after—"
Baozi Le, drinking alcohol.
I poured her a drink and said, "Oh, by the way, I have a small gift for you."
"What?" Baozi had clearly been led astray by me, her face full of tenderness.
I took out my phone, thought about it silently for a while, and then used a mind-reading technique on myself. A blinking red heart immediately appeared on the phone screen.
I held the phone up to Baozi's face.
Baozi covered his mouth with his hand...
I said smugly, "Do you like it?"
Baozi carefully took the phone, examining the red heart inside that seemed about to burst out of her skin without saying a word. I suspected she was going to burst into tears any second and then throw herself into my arms like in the movies…
After looking at it for a long time, Baozi finally said, "Your crappy phone can even receive MMS messages?"
I:"……"