Mao Sui came over and put his arm around Qin Wuyang's shoulder, saying, "Brother, you're wrong to say that. Even if Xiao Qiang wasn't there, there were still so many guards. And—no offense, but threatening the monarch to scare him would have been fine, but you actually killed him. You have no professional ethics."
Li Shimin stepped in to smooth things over, saying, "Alright, alright, this is all in the past, no one is allowed to keep bringing it up."
Qin Wuyang cried out, her voice trembling with tears, "You're done talking?"
These people, eager to quickly move on from this so they could ask me about my return, were being rather self-serving and wishful thinking, completely disregarding Qin Wuyang's need for reassurance. Just over ten hours ago, I had slapped him mercilessly in front of everyone with a leather shoe, as if it were free. By the time he realized it, he had already lost face beyond the year 2000.
I looked at him sympathetically and said, “Brother, I have no personal problem with you. The reason I’m stopping you is twofold: first, because Qin Shi Huang is my friend, and second, because he can’t die. Let me put it this way: if he doesn’t die, you’ll at least have a place in history and be able to relax with me for a year; but if he dies, you, me, and everyone here will be finished.”
Li Shimin asked with concern, "Xiaoqiang, tell us what exactly happened." Several emperors following closely behind him also craned their necks to look over. Theoretically speaking, the better one's life was in the previous life, the more one naturally wants to go back. And those qualified to come here are basically outstanding people of great renown, so when they heard that there was still hope of returning, they were all very concerned.
I walked up to the podium, cleared my throat, and said, "So, everyone must believe in the existence of gods and immortals now, right? Well, above gods and immortals, there is a restraining force called the Heavenly Way..."
I don't think this is a particularly big secret for my clients; they still have to drink the "soup of oblivion" before they go back to their mortal realm. It's like a doctor discussing surgery with a patient. The true nature of the illness is somewhere in between—it's optional—but the patient will ultimately be given anesthesia anyway…
I particularly emphasized the fact that the course of history cannot be changed, which is not good news. Who wants to keep repeating the same old path, and repeating it for a lifetime, knowing exactly when they will be successful, when they will be unsuccessful, and when they will die? This is absolutely intolerable for these creative and controlling people.
Sure enough, after I finished speaking, people looked at each other in silence for a long while. Wu Daozi cautiously asked, "So, if you don't come looking for us after we go back, we won't even know we're alive?"
I scratched my head; this question is too difficult to answer. It's gone beyond philosophy and is almost an ethical issue. In reality, human emotions are nothing more than memories. If there were no memories, one couldn't deeply identify with another person based on simple blood ties, or for a stranger to suddenly claim to be your best friend—it's all meaningless. Wu Daozi's point is: if a person cannot possess unified memories, then they are no different from several unrelated individuals.
Before I could even come up with an answer, Hua Rong blurted out, "So if I die in the future, will I be able to be with my brothers again?"
I was both angry and amused: "Don't get your hopes up. Heaven will eventually return to normal. Even if it doesn't, you'll still outlive me, won't you?"
Hua Rong was still not giving up: "Can't you come and go as you please? Next time you leave, take me with you." Fang Zhenjiang said: "Me too."
I waved my hands vigorously and said, "No, no. If I go back, Hua Rong and Wu Song over there are still alive. What will happen if you two go?"
This fatal assumption immediately deflated Hua Rong and Fang Zhenjiang, who slumped down and remained silent with their heads down.
Zhu Yuanzhang's eyes lit up and he said, "Xiaoqiang, after we leave, why don't you take the medicine and go look for us again?" Zhao Kuangyin, who was beside him, nodded vigorously.
I laughed and said, "Why would I come to you if you weren't going to change the course of history?"
Zhu Yuanzhang thought for a moment and said, "How about this? After you find us, we'll just not change anything, right? I really don't want to forget who I am after drinking that bowl of Meng Po soup. You can come find me after I become emperor. Even if I can only live a conventional life after taking the medicine, at least I'll know who I am and how I got here. I can also be a stable emperor for ten or twenty years. Don't you think so—"
Zhao Kuangyin and Li Shimin readily agreed, and many others cheered enthusiastically. These people didn't come to me out of desperation; they chose to do so themselves. The reason they did this was simply because they longed for their past lives. Now that they know they can go back, more than half of them are clamoring for me to come find them. This is equivalent to living two extraordinary lives, only the second life has less suspense and more clarity—in short, they would rather have a more mundane life than lose a memory and become lost.
Bian Que and Hua Tuo exchanged a glance, then suddenly stood up together and said, "Xiao Qiang, please come find us after we leave. We've made progress on our anti-cancer drug research, but time is clearly running out. If you can help us restore our memories after we return, we'll definitely succeed. You'll be a savior for countless people."
With my eyes sparkling, I said, "It seems I can't refuse this request. The Nobel Prize in Medicine is beckoning to you two."
Hua Tuo simply smiled faintly, while Bian Que said, "How pathetic! Why are you always eyeing those foreign awards? Why don't you create a Hua Tuo Award, a Bian Que Award, or even a Xiao Qiang Award to surpass them?"
These words were like a wake-up call, and I suddenly understood. I said, "That's right, let's set up a talent cultivation award and have all the foreigners vie for it."
Li Shimin chuckled and interjected, "And then willingly accept that they couldn't get it—"
Look, this is the magnanimity of an emperor.
Actually, I have always held Nobel in high esteem because he resolutely refused to establish a mathematics prize...
Now, people in the hall were all offering their own reasons for me to visit them. I waved my hand repeatedly and said, "Let's leave this matter here for today. We'll deal with each situation individually in the future." I went to Qin Wuyang and said, "Now you understand, right?"
Qin Wuyang sighed, "What's the use of understanding or not? We can only accept it. Even if I wanted to kill you, they would have to let me." He suddenly looked at the sneakers I was wearing and said, "Why didn't you use them to hit me back then? These don't look like they hurt much."
...
When I got home, I saw the light was on in He Tiandou's room. I barged in and shouted loudly, "Where have you two old geezers been? I have something to ask you."
Liu Laoliu chuckled and said, "See? I told you this kid wouldn't appreciate it."
I was taken aback: "What favor are you asking?"
He Tiandou said, "Tell me your question first."
I said angrily, "I'm asking you, how come Li Si was a modern person in his previous life?"
He Tiandou laughed and said, "What's so strange about that? This has always been a phenomenon. Do you think that people from the Qin Dynasty can only be reborn in the Han Dynasty after they die? Have you heard of the Six Paths of Reincarnation? Since it's a cycle of reincarnation, it's possible for modern people to be reborn in the Qin Dynasty after they die. However, it wasn't very common to be reborn in a previous era. It's just that it's become more common after the axis of the human world was reversed."
I suddenly realized, "No wonder Hua Rong and Fang Zhenjiang were in the Song Dynasty in their past lives but suddenly found themselves in the 20th century in this one. So that's the reason." I then turned to Liu Laoliu, "Your turn. Tell me, I have no problem with Qin Wuyang becoming my client, but why is he the same Qin Wuyang I knocked out?"
Liu Laoliu said innocently, "It's nothing. How many Qin dynasties do you think there are in history? Since you went back and knocked them unconscious, of course they have to be allowed to remember you. The human world's axis being reversed just makes the times parallel, it doesn't mean there's an extra section."
I organized my thoughts and said, "So, after I knocked Qin Wuyang unconscious, whether the historians wrote it according to the facts or not was their business, but it wouldn't be passed down to later generations?"
Liu Laoliu snapped his fingers: "You're finally done."
I shrugged and said, "Wait, then I'm confused again. If that's the case, why should I bother running around trying to stop them from changing history? Everyone can live their own lives anyway. Even if Xiang Yu defeats Liu Bang and takes the throne, we're still us. In the next cycle of human history, Liu Bang's descendants will still be emperors of the Han Dynasty. It won't bother anyone!"
He Tiandou said, "That's right, that's exactly it."
Seeing that I was about to break down, Liu Laoliu laughed and said, "Didn't I tell you this a long time ago? The reason we have to follow history is because of the surveillance of the Heavenly Dao. Although any major changes in any dynasty will not affect the entire human world axis, that's not how the Heavenly Dao thinks. It only recognizes its own system. To give you an analogy, it's like a card reader and we are the magnetic cards. If there's a broken end on the magnetic strip, it will think that the magnetic card is broken, it will spit out the card, and we will be wiped out."
I felt a sudden clarity in my mind: "All that I've done is merely a small-scale repair of the broken points, with the aim of deceiving the Heavenly Dao?"
Liu Laoliu and He Tiandou clapped together: "Hey, a complete epiphany!"
I stomped my foot and said, "Why didn't you explain this earlier? You made me think I was some kind of great person." Then I poked Liu Laoliu in the waist and said, "What did you just say? What favors did I owe you?"
He Tiandou confidently pulled out a piece of paper and said to me, "You just realized what we're doing. All we need to do is exploit a bug in the Heavenly Dao to get through. Once it lets our magnetic card through, everything will be fine. For it to let us through, our magnetic stripe has to come down smoothly..."
"Stop talking nonsense and get to the point!"
He Tiandou clapped his hands: "What follows is absolutely the key point - Lao Liu and I have been working day and night for several days and nights and finally figured out a key point. History is actually made up of a few key points in each dynasty. As long as you grasp these key points, you don't need to worry about other trivial matters. We have found these key points in the past few days."
I laughed and said, "Two old bachelors who don't sleep and are just doing this kind of research, how can they possibly have an orgasm?"