I suppressed a laugh and pointed at his nose, saying, "You've been an artist for over a week and you still have no money?"
Dong Ping took the medicine from my hand, picked up a teacup from the table, put the medicine in it in front of Zhang Zeduan, and then handed it to him, saying, "Drink it!"
Zhang Zeduan sneered: "This is poison?"
We shouted in unison, "Yes, it's poison!"
Zhang Zeduan moved his teacup aside and said sternly, "All of you, please be quiet. Let me finish this painting first. I can't leave an unfinished painting for posterity."
Dong Ping said, "Damn it, do you think you're Archimedes?"
We went over to take a look, and it turned out that Old Zhang had painted the same "Returning Home from Treading on Flowers, Horse Hooves Fragrant" that he had painted at Yucai School—we would never have waited for him to paint "Along the River During the Qingming Festival".
Zhang Zeduan patted his brush on the inkstone, seemingly unconcerned about the idle people around him. Concentrating intently, the latter half of the painting gradually emerged on the paper. Although we were all laymen, we found it delightful to look at. When the fluttering butterflies appeared, the whole painting instantly gained more charm. Zhang Zeduan seemed quite pleased with himself, and as usual, he picked up his teacup and drank it all in one gulp, wiping his mouth and saying, "Eh, it seems something's missing?" Before we could speak, Old Zhang suddenly drew two black lines behind the horse with a "whoosh."
We were both startled and asked, "What is this?" Zhang Zeduan pointed it out to us, "It's the wind—isn't this Xiaoqiang's surrealism?"
A beautiful painting is now ruined...
After helping Zhang Zeduan ruin the painting and catching up with old friends, I said to Zhang Qing and the others, "Today is today. Brothers, please go to the trouble of finding Li Bai and the others for me."
The bandits, who were bored anyway, all agreed.
We arrived in the Tang Dynasty during the reign of Emperor Xuanzong, and the car stopped by itself in front of a tavern. The place was entirely made of wood, and the aroma of wine could be smelled from afar. Dong Ping sniffed and said, "Good wine indeed, let's have a few bowls."
Zhang Qing stopped him, saying, "No rush to drink. This place is probably full of Li Bai. We need to get down to business."
Duan Jingzhu said, "Actually, we can drink and do business at the same time. Why don't we go in and invite the old man for a bowl of wine?"
We all nodded and said, "Then go ahead."
Duan Jingzhu said dejectedly, "Why me again?"
We all said in unison, "Because you are the youngest!"
Duan Jingzhu pointed at me and said, "Xiao Qiang is still behind me."
I handed him a blue potion: "Aren't you smarter than me?"
Duan Jingzhu then muttered to himself as he wandered into the restaurant. About ten minutes later, a loud commotion erupted inside, followed by the sound of cups and plates falling to the ground and the shouts of a waiter. Just as we were wondering what was going on, we saw Duan Jingzhu dart out, head in his hands, followed by a stumbling old man. This man had gray hair, which fluttered in the wind, and his face was flushed from drinking. He was clutching a wooden tray used by restaurant staff and relentlessly chasing after Duan Jingzhu, beating him mercilessly.
Duan Jingzhu ran towards us, crying out, "Brothers, save me!"
"How did we offend the old man?" We hurriedly got out of the car, and Zhang Qing and Dong Ping rushed up from the left and right. Li Kui bumped into Li Bai and hugged him around the waist.
Seeing that we had reinforcements, Li Bai showed no fear. The old man jumped around, shouting and yelling, sometimes throwing wild punches, sometimes unleashing flying kicks, and he actually managed to make the three top Liangshan fighters look disheveled. Dong Ping, while trying to grab the old man's hand, asked Duan Jingzhu, "What did you do to him?"
Duan Jingzhu said in a frenzy, "I didn't provoke him. I just asked him if he knew me, and he got angry with me."
Zhang Qing asked softly, "Did you take your medicine?"
Duan Jingzhu said, "I only asked after I ate!"
"Then what is this?"
As they were talking, Li Kui finally pounced on Li Bai like a vicious dog, pinning him to the ground and yelling, "I've got him! I've got him! Hurry up!"
It took four or five of us a lot of effort to subdue the old man. The shop assistant carefully took the wooden tray from his hands before asking us, "Who are you?"
I was afraid he was going to report me to the authorities, so I said, "We are from the government!"
The shop assistant asked, "So what are you doing here?"
I was speechless for a moment, and Zhang Qing said irritably, "Can't you see? They're arresting poets!"
The shopkeeper asked cautiously, "Are we arresting every poet?"
We could only nod haphazardly. The shopkeeper immediately cheered, "His Majesty is finally doing something practical for us common people—"
Chapter 207 Calling a Deer a Horse
Later I learned why Li Bai was so disliked: After meeting Emperor Xuanzong of Tang, the emperor, while appreciating Li Bai's talent, felt that this arrogant man was unsuitable to keep by his side. Therefore, he bestowed gold upon him and released him, also giving him a small token that allowed him to drink anywhere without paying. This would be considered a fine story in later generations, but in his time it was a disaster for the people, especially those who owned restaurants. Seeing him arrive meant certain loss. His was different from mine; mine allowed customers to sign a bill and get reimbursed by the government, but with him, whoever was begging had to accept their bad luck. Emperor Xuanzong, whether out of detachment from worldly affairs or deliberately mocking Li Bai, bestowed upon him this "ordered begging" honor. Li Bai, the pioneer of romanticism, probably thought it was an elegant affair. But what about the wine sellers?
Therefore, poets like Li Bai, whether in the Tang Dynasty or in later generations, were a group that was out of step with reality.
After finally getting Old Li into the car, the old man was still gesturing wildly and muttering to himself. Dong Ping picked up a mineral water bottle, looked at me, and asked, "Should I splash it or not?"
I steeled myself and said, "Splash!" Both times I met this old man at Yucai and Tangchao, it never seemed to start this way. Dong Ping splashed some water on Li Bai's face, and Li Bai stretched lazily, sighing, "Alas—"
I said cautiously, "Brother Taibai, wake up, it's me."
Li Bai then looked at me closely, paused for a moment, and smiled, "Oh, so you're very strong, my brother."
I breathed a sigh of relief and said, "You're finally awake."
Li Bai looked at us, then at himself, and suddenly asked, "Where am I? And who am I?"
I yelled in frustration, "Damn it, he remembered me, but forgot who he is."
Zhang Qing chuckled and said, "It's not fully awake yet. Let's leave it there for now and deal with it later."
About half an hour later, Li Bai got up, rubbing the wrinkles on his face. He glanced at me and exclaimed in surprise, "Hey, Xiao Qiang, what are you doing here—no, you should ask me where I am?"
Zhang Qing smiled and said, "He's awake."
Duan Jingzhu grabbed Li Bai and said, "Why did you hit me just now?"
Li Bai said embarrassedly, "I saw your head was all yellow, and I thought you were some evil spirit coming to arrest me again."