Kapitel 10

cheerful

"I have reviewed everyone's opinions on the school anniversary closing ceremony and discussed them with President Jiang. My suggestion is to hold a joint dance for both schools during the closing ceremony on the last day." With her hands on the conference table, Cheng Yongxin spoke passionately, her bright and spirited eyes captivating everyone present. The boys were filled with admiration and respect, while the girls were filled with reverence and pride.

How fortunate they are to have such a wise, talented, and intelligent leader! With such a capable president, it means that the department heads don't have to worry about many things; the president will handle them automatically. It also means they don't have to worry about issues like funding or assistance from other organizations; the president will take the initiative to arrange those. This means they can rest easy and be lazy to their heart's content...

It's so wonderful to have someone like Cheng Yongxin!

Compared to everyone else's tearful expressions, Fang Yu and Su Ying, Cheng Yongxin's best friends, were not in such a good mood. Instead, they felt as if a great disaster was about to befall them.

"Hey, don't you think Yongxin's been a bit... uh, a bit too cheerful lately?" Fang Yu nudged Su Ying with her elbow, but she didn't seem to be affected by the good mood around her; instead, her expression was heavy.

"It's not just cheerful; I almost suspect she found gold on the street or won five million in the lottery." Su Ying looked up at Cheng Yongxin, who was all smiles on the podium, a hint of worry flashing across her face.

"Sometimes, being too cheerful can arouse suspicion."

Compared to Cheng Yongxin's vibrant and energetic spirit, Jiang Haozhe, sitting next to her, looked utterly dejected. Leaving aside his gloomy face, resembling an impending storm, and temporarily disregarding the reason for his tightly pursed lips that seemed to indicate someone owed him a fortune, his eyes... what? Eyes? Yes! His eyes! They were lifeless, dull, and expressionless—even the most unappealing adjectives like "dead fish eyes" could describe him. He completely lacked his usual spirited demeanor, as if he had suddenly suffered a tremendous blow, sitting there utterly unmoved, like an empty shell, devoid of any vitality.

To give up or not to give up?

This simple question has been troubling him for the past few days, like a curse, echoing in his mind whenever his thoughts pause.

Sometimes he truly admired Cheng Yongxin's unwavering persistence. Regardless of whether her feelings would be reciprocated or whether her efforts would yield results, she remained steadfast, like a moth drawn to a flame, knowing full well that she would perish in the fire, yet still willingly. But he… he was too greedy. He didn't want to receive no response from her after his one-sided devotion. He hoped she would reciprocate his feelings, just as he had received as much as he had given…

However, for a long time he forgot the most important point: feelings are not an equal exchange; you can't get as much back as you give...

Perhaps that's why hope seems so faint, and why... why despair feels so intense.

"President Jiang, what's your opinion? What do you think?"

Suddenly, a smiling face appeared in his line of sight, startling Jiang Haozhe and bringing him back to reality. He realized that everyone's eyes were on him, and he forced a smile. "I have no objection to this matter. It's up to everyone else to decide."

Seeing the fleeting moment of surprise on his face, Cheng Yongxin glanced at him with concern, a hint of helplessness flashing in her eyes, but it disappeared in an instant. A moment later, she raised her face, her smile unchanged: "Then, let's vote on this proposal. If there are no objections, we'll consider it passed."

"Chairman Cheng's suggestions are always good, so we naturally have nothing to say."

"Since Chairman Jiang has agreed, we have no reason to object."

"Using a ball as the final closing ceremony can save money and also promote further development between our two schools, which is a good idea."

After everyone chattered for a while, they all agreed in the end. So all the matters were settled and the meeting adjourned. Cheng Yongxin's smile never faded from the beginning. She saw everyone off and even used an excuse to send Su Ying and Fang Yu away. After the huge conference room was empty again, her smiling face finally relaxed and there was no trace of smile left.

She sighed deeply, slumped wearily into the chair, feeling as if all her strength had been drained away, and was unable to move.

So tired...

She never imagined that pretending could be such an exhausting thing. Why had she never realized it before?

She used to be a master of disguise, her skill reaching unparalleled heights. But now, even faking a smile seems to drain all her strength. She can appear perfectly at ease in front of others, feigning nonchalance as if nothing has happened. But only she knows that some things cannot be forgotten simply by pretending…

She can pretend to be happy, even when she isn't; she can pretend to be strong, even when she isn't...

Perhaps she's become too accustomed to pretending, and she's lost herself in the pretense. They say people know themselves best, but even she's almost forgotten who she truly is, let alone Su Ying and Fang Yu beside her. They understand her personality, but not her. And Brother Jiang…

Even if she manages to win Brother Jiang's favor by pretending to be perfect, can that be considered happiness?

not to mention……

He never considered her as a potential romantic partner at all.

Straightening up, Cheng Yongxin tidied up the various documents scattered on the table and went out.

As autumn deepened, the wind began to carry a biting smell, stinging her face slightly. But how could that slight pain compare to the pain that had numbed her heart?

She had lost all sense of pain; her eyes were dry as sand, unable to squeeze out a single tear. She had almost forgotten what sadness felt like. In her memory, her world was filled with laughter, anger, and sweat… but there were no tears. She rarely cried because her life was always so lively, with her favorite older brother Jiang, and Jiang Haozhe, who loved to make her angry… From childhood to adulthood, he had always made her furious, and whenever she was enraged, she would abandon all pretense of decorum and have a huge argument with him…

"By the way, that guy seems a bit off lately. Although he's still doing his work as usual and his efficiency is as high as ever, he seems a little absent-minded... Has something happened?" Cheng Yongxin thought with some worry as the image of Jiang Haozhe's dazed look flashed through her mind.

She's so heartbroken because she's broken up with her boyfriend, but what about him? It's impossible that he had the same reason.

A smile crept across her face as she chuckled at her own foolish thought. That guy's coldness was comparable to an iceberg, and his words were both annoying and vicious. She often wondered if Jiang Haozhe's blood was cold too. How many people could possibly hurt someone like that?

However, despite thinking this way, she couldn't shake off the feeling of worry and melancholy. Unexpectedly, she looked up and saw a slender and upright figure standing at the school gate in the twilight. She was a little stunned.

No way... Could it be that she and that guy are really telepathic? She had only just thought of him, and he appeared so quickly?

She didn't know why she felt a tiny bit of... really, just a tiny bit of joy in her heart. She rushed to the person and was about to call out to them when she froze.

Mo Zijin gazed at her with a detached expression. His medium-length black hair fluttered in the autumn breeze, giving him an ethereal air. This was a stark contrast to his usual flamboyant and dazzling appearance, which always seemed to require ten flashlights to enhance his presence.

"...Mo Zijin, why aren't you going back?" Thanks to Mo Zijin's unconventional way of thinking and narcissism, Cheng Yongxin had a deep impression of him, although she didn't think they had a very deep friendship.

"...President Cheng, I..."

Seeing his hesitant and reluctant expression, Cheng Yongxin raised her eyebrows in confusion.

Strange, really strange! Her recent unusual behavior was understandable, given her recent emotional trauma. But Jiang Haozhe's strangeness was already an unprecedented phenomenon, and now Mo Zijing is adding another one to the mix...

Could it be that it's not that the three of them are abnormal, but that the whole world has gone mad?

A smile appeared on her face as she tried to speak in her usual "most natural" manner, "Is there something you need, Mo?"

“Um… I want to tell you—” He couldn’t bring himself to tell her that pursuing her was just an attempt to get revenge on Jiang Haozhe. But if he didn’t apologize, he would feel guilty. The most basic requirement of the “gentlemanly conduct” education he received since childhood was that a man should not embarrass or hurt a woman. No matter the reason, as long as he hurt a girl, it was an unforgivable crime.

And deception is of paramount importance.

Therefore, he could never forgive himself, and this realization kept him up at night.

"What's wrong?" Cheng Yongxin looked at him, waiting for him to continue.

Mo Zijing took a deep breath and finally looked up at the girl in front of him who always had a bright smile. Now that he knew she wasn't one of his targets for revenge, he didn't need to worry about his image anymore. So he sincerely lowered his head and apologized, "I'm sorry."

"...Why?" Cheng Yongxin was stunned for a while before she found her voice. She didn't understand why this sudden apology was coming. Mo Zijin hadn't offended her at all.

"I can't say why, but I apologize for the trouble I caused you before," Mo Zijing said sincerely, her expression earnest.

Actually, he's not a bad guy. He's handsome, has a tall and straight figure, and has the air of a noble young master... It's just that he would be more popular if he did less of his usual silly antics, Cheng Yongxin thought, looking at his sincere face.

"Although I don't understand what you're saying, I accept your apology."

Looking at him, Cheng Yongxin smiled genuinely, a rare occurrence for her.

"Also, I want to thank you; those roses were really beautiful."

Behind every effort lies a heartfelt sentiment. Although she never understood why Mo Zijin gave her those roses, she could now feel that those carefully wrapped sentiments, like tiny stars in the night sky, twinkled with light and could not be ignored.

"Mo, it's best to save the roses for the girl you like. One day, there will be someone you truly like and cherish who is right for them... Giving them to me would be such a waste."

She might be the least suited person for love. She harbored a one-sided love for nearly ten years, only to end up empty-handed and heartbroken. Therefore, roses are not for her…

Mo Zijing stared blankly as Cheng Yongxin smiled and waved goodbye to her.

He's here today to apologize for his previous false pursuit, because he only approached her to get revenge on Jiang Haozhe; he didn't like her... Therefore, he hopes to be forgiven.

But why was his heart beating so fast because of the innocent smile she had just shown him? This feeling he was experiencing...

Her hand unconsciously went to her chest. Gazing in the direction Cheng Yongxin had left, Mo Zijing stood like a stone statue in front of the gate of Youluo Girls' High School, her face flushed...

Tears

What a coincidence.

Looking at Jiang Haozhe standing in front of her, Cheng Yongxin felt an urge to burst out laughing.

What bad luck she had today! First Mo Zijing came along, and now this guy is here too.

Strange things happen every year, but there seem to be more than usual today.

Jiang Haozhe wasn't wearing a coat, only a beige cardigan and matching pants, and he was holding a wallet in his hand, as if he was planning to buy something nearby.

He showed the same surprise when he saw her.

"Going shopping?"

The two stood facing each other, and it would be too strange not to say something, so Cheng Yongxin chose to break the deadlock.

"Hmm." He nodded, then, as if to uphold the principle of reciprocity, casually asked her, "Just got back?"

"Yes." She nodded as well.

After that, they remained silent.

"It's a really strange feeling," Cheng Yongxin thought to herself.

It wasn't like this was her first time meeting Jiang Haozhe, so why did she feel so awkward? Seeing him made her feel like she didn't even know what to say. She missed the days when they used to argue fiercely and get red in the face, at least... she wouldn't feel so helpless like she did now.

"Well then... I'll be going now." Jiang Haozhe nodded slightly, marking the end of this chance encounter on the road.

As he left, she was somewhat stunned. For some reason, she felt a pang of fear, a fear of walking back alone to her room, a room once filled with her love, and reminiscing about the past...

“That… Jiang Haozhe…”

Jiang Haozhe abruptly stopped in his tracks, turning around in surprise with disbelief in his eyes. Not to mention that she would actually call him by his name in a serious manner, just the tone of her voice, that hesitant yet pleading tone, if he weren't absolutely certain that the person standing in front of him was Cheng Yongxin, whom he had known for almost ten years, he would really think he was hallucinating in broad daylight.

Did he think she was acting strangely? Cheng Yongxin glanced at him nervously, "Um... I... I'll go shopping with you, okay?"

Her voice was cautious, sounding rather pitiful, especially with the way she was staring at him expectantly. If you added a pair of ears to her head right now, she would look exactly like a little bunny... Jiang Haozhe found it somewhat amusing. The Cheng Yongxin he knew was always the feisty little wildcat type. A little bunny? How could he even think of that!

"Sure, I don't mind."

Actually, all Jiang Haozhe wanted to buy was a newspaper at the bookstore at the end of the street. The distance was no more than 200 meters, which would only take a few minutes. After buying the newspaper, he had nothing else to do. Jiang Haozhe glanced at Cheng Yongxin, who was following him like a follower, and sighed involuntarily, "How about we go sit in the park for a while?"

"Huh? Ah... well, okay." As if she hadn't expected him to suddenly speak to her, she answered hastily, her face flushed red, making her look even more like a little rabbit.

The so-called park is nothing more than a small square built in a residential area. Because it is planted with flowers, trees and shrubs, and has many fitness and children’s entertainment facilities, it often attracts the elderly and children in the neighborhood to linger here. It is rather rare to see high school students like Jiang Haozhe and Cheng Yongxin, who are seventeen or eighteen years old, lying there.

"Here you go." Jiang Haozhe took out the still-warm black tea from the vending machine, handed it to her, and then sat down on the swing with her.

"Thank you," she replied softly and shyly, which made Jiang Haozhe frown.

"Don't do that, it makes me feel uncomfortable." His slender fingers unzipped the tea bottle, and even in a casual gesture, he exuded an elegance unlike that of ordinary people. "If someone who's usually as fierce as a bear suddenly turns into a rabbit, you might not care, but it's wrong of you to scare people."

"This guy!" Cheng Yongxin glared at him, annoyed. Jiang Haozhe really had the ability to arouse people's criminal instincts with just a few words. If something were to happen to him one day, it would most likely be his own doing, and the criminal should not be solely blamed.

"You're just as strange, always acting weird and eccentric, either lost in thought or spacing out. While it's your freedom to do what you want, it's wrong to make the people around you worry!" She retorted defiantly, mimicking his previous tone. This was almost their fixed pattern of interaction; they would never let the other gain the upper hand in a verbal exchange. Even with smiles, if he smiled brightly, she would smile even brighter than him.

Worried? She's actually worried about him?

Jiang Haozhe smiled somewhat sarcastically, glanced at her indifferently, then lowered his head again, took a sip of black tea, and said, "I just have something to take care of."

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