Hibiscus as a Painting - Chapter 123
As Sikou Xunxiang exerted his strength, the soft mountain ground suddenly collapsed a bit more, and the group, who wanted to move forward, stopped in their tracks.
Prince Anle was in a state of panic. He whispered, "Brother, Nan'er is alright... Please, slowly, bring the little mute girl up... okay?"
Zi Jin suddenly opened her eyes; her rain-soaked eyelashes could not conceal the pain and heartbreak in them.
The soil had just collapsed, and Sikou Xunxiang was filled with panic, not daring to exert any force rashly. He lowered his eyes, not daring to look at Zi Jin, but his hands gripped even tighter, not daring to relax even slightly.
“Little Bai… let’s go to the Immortal Mountain and find a place where we can enjoy the scenery every day. We’ll build a house by connecting to a hot spring. The house doesn’t need to be too big, just big enough to live in. You can paint, and I’ll play the zither. Although I can’t compose poetry, I can understand what you’re reciting. My cooking skills aren’t great, but the food I make is at least edible. If we get tired of this mundane routine, we can travel the world together, wandering the rivers and lakes. We can go back whenever we’ve had enough fun, okay? Little Bai… it’s raining heavily, and I’m cold. Can you warm me up? Little Bai… I was wrong. I won’t throw a tantrum again. Please don’t be angry anymore, okay?”
"Shut up!" A few words spoken with a nonchalant air completely threw Sikou Xunxiang into disarray. The incredibly strong defenses he had painstakingly built up by biting into the tender flesh in his mouth crumbled instantly. His mind was in turmoil. He closed his eyes and used a loud rebuke to refute the reluctance, pity, pain, panic, and all sorts of other unclear emotions in his heart.
"Little White... your hair is so beautiful, softer and smoother than silk, like silver threads. I've never seen such beautiful hair before. Little White..."
"Shut up! You don't need to say anything more. Whoever you are, I will save you." Sikou Huanxiang closed his eyes, trying hard to concentrate and remain unmoved. Why couldn't he see his own heart clearly? Was it that he couldn't see his own heart? Or had his heart already betrayed him?!
Si Kou Xunxiang tried to pull Zi Jin, but a large section of the mountainside beside them suddenly collapsed, and he immediately stopped, not daring to move again.
Hearing this, Zi Jin felt another pang of pain in her heart. Yes... no matter who it was, no matter who it was, he wouldn't abandon her. She wasn't special in his heart. Si Kou Xun Xiang was gentle and refined... even if she carried the stigma of being an enemy, even if he didn't want to save her, he would eventually do so.
"Xiaobai... your hands seem to have magic power. No matter where I hurt, as long as you rub them for me, I won't feel any pain at all, not even a little bit."
A cold glint flashed across Si Kou Xunxiang's brows as he bit down hard on the tender flesh in his mouth, his fingers trembling slightly. He couldn't let her disrupt his peace of mind! No! No! No! His heart was already in such a state! How could he bear it?! How could he bear it…
Zi Jin sensed Si Kou Xunxiang's panic and struggle, and the barely perceptible indifference chilled her heart. She smiled sadly and gripped Si Kou Xunxiang's hand tightly.
Si Kou Xunxiang trembled all over and his fingers twitched slightly, but in the end he did not let go of Zi Jin's hand. However, his hand could no longer hold Zi Jin's wrist tightly.
Zi Jin tilted her head back, her eyes blurred with tears, unable to see anything clearly: "I've been filled with fear and unease every day, abandoning my pride to cling to you. I know Xiao Bai is Si Kou Xun Xiang, I know Xiao Bai is Si Kou Xun Xiang, I've always known, yet I pretended I knew nothing, knew nothing at all. Day after day, I deceived myself, yearning for happiness. I gave you all the promises I could... I poured out everything, wanting to hold your hand tightly, never letting go. I have nothing left, I've given up everything, isn't that enough? Isn't that enough?"
A tearing sound resonated in Si Kou Huan Xiang's heart, the pain instantly penetrating to his very bones. He widened his eyes, forcing himself to remain unmoved, a struggle flashing in his eyes: "Stop saying such things. I said... no matter who you are, I will save you and keep your life!"
Zi Jin stared into Si Kou Xunxiang's gentle yet struggling eyes, pressing him relentlessly with each word: "It's not because you're Xiao Bai, nor because you're Si Kou Xunxiang, it's simply because you are you. I love the feeling of being with you, I cherish the warmth of your embrace, so I think I've fallen in love with you... Do you know?... To them, you're just one person, but to me, you were once my whole life."
Si Kou Xunxiang froze, Zi Jin's pained and aggrieved appearance directly damaging his mind, leaving him dizzy. He bit his lip, trying to exude an imposing aura and regain his composure, and said in a voice that only the two of them could hear, "You don't need to go to such lengths to fabricate these things. Whoever it is, I will do my best to save your life."
Zi Jin was heartbroken, staring blankly at Si Kou Xun Xiang: So, in your eyes, I am so worthless, fabricating these things just to save my life... Hah...
Suddenly, a section of the wall collapsed where their arms were joined, slamming Sikou Huanxiang's hand against the stone wall. He struggled to grip his hand, but couldn't loosen his grip. Instantly, Sikou Huanxiang's face turned pale.
Si Kou Xunxiang exuded an overbearing aura, making Zi Jin feel breathless.
The sudden collapse threw Zi Jin into a panic. She gripped her hands even tighter, but her hands were already too weak from being soaked in the rain. However, Si Kou Xunxiang's hands refused to exert any more force.
Zi Jin was instantly heartbroken. Her eyes stung with tears, which mingled with the rain and streamed down her face: "Xiao Bai... if I have to leave you this time, it certainly won't be my intention. I'm not saying this to save my own life... I don't want to... I don't want to beg you anymore, and I'm tired of everything. I want to preserve my last bit of dignity and give myself a way out..."
"Brother... bring the little mute up here, and I'll listen to you in everything from now on, I really will listen to you in everything... Brother... listen to me, there are still so many things I haven't told you... When you bring the little mute up here, I'll tell you everything, okay?" Si Kou Xun Le's beautiful face was filled with panic, her eyes full of fear and unease.
Si Kou Xunxiang felt Zi Jin's hand gripping his tightly. A sudden surge of inexplicable joy and trembling welled up in his chaotic heart. It was an indescribable feeling, a familiar feeling of being relied upon and trusted. She ultimately didn't want to let go of him, ultimately wouldn't let go of him, would she?
Zi Jin lowered her head silently. After a long while, she looked up again, a faint smile on her face. Her eyes were fixed on Si Kou Xunxiang's now gentle and jade-like face, his warm and comforting eyes like warm jade: She had made him suffer, she had burdened him, she had forced him… He had merely loosened his grip, and it was as if he had changed completely. His expression was so clear, so relieved, the warmth on his face so poignant it brought tears to her eyes. She shouldn't have forced him… shouldn't she? She shouldn't have forced him…
Si Kou Xunxiang's eyes held a warm smile, all his emotions replaced by an inexplicable joy. He carefully moved his other hand, trying to find an opportunity to replace the book that she was holding tightly.
Zi Jin clenched her fists again with all her might, her nails digging into Si Kou Huan Xiang's wrist. Her heart was ice-cold. Si Kou Huan Xiang's hand was now only loosely gripping her; if she were to let go even slightly, she would be doomed.
Si Kou Xunxiang's face was warm and gentle, like the spring sun in March, but Zi Jin's heart had fallen into an ice cave. After the pain reached its extreme, she was completely numb.
Zi Jin slowly raised her head, staring into Si Kou Xunxiang's warm, jade-like eyes. A beautiful smile suddenly bloomed on her lips as she softly said, "You're so handsome... I want to look at you like this for a lifetime... no... even a lifetime wouldn't be enough... I once said... if one day we had to choose, I would never let you go... but now I'm going to change my mind... I really am... it turns out your heart... was never with me... This time, I think... this time... I'll let go..."
Zi Jin released her hand without warning, and Si Kou Xunxiang's expression changed instantly. He panicked and tried to grab her with both hands, but only tore his sleeves to shreds...
Zi Jin's eyes were hazy and her gaze gradually dimmed. She looked at Si Kou Xunxiang's flustered face with a smile, as if she saw the man in the fiery red wedding robes in the Phoenix Palace years ago, who gave her a flustered smile when he first saw her, and subconsciously murmured, "Brother..."
At that moment, their tightly clasped fingers suddenly loosened, and a tearing sound ripped through their hearts.
Back then, when Yu Luo called out to her brother, it was simply because she couldn't control her emotions. But at this moment, it was such a heart-wrenching pain.
My heart tightened more and more, and the pain was indescribable.
Who is she?! Who is she?! Who exactly is she?! Why is she haunting me?! Why did I choose to let go at the last moment?! Did she say she would never let go again?! Did she promise she would never let go of me again?! Why deceive me again?! Why can I still bear to deceive myself like this?! Why?!
A cloud of brocade floated in the wind. Sikou Xunxiang stared blankly into the depths of the clouds and murmured, "Jin'er, Jin'er, come back..." His hand hung empty in mid-air, and his face was wet with rain or tears.
She had held his hand tightly, refusing to let go, and whispered in his ear that she would never let go. Why did she change her mind? How could she change her mind? Why did she change her mind again?
Jin'er, how cruel you are, how cruel you are! How could you lie to me again? How could you bear to lie to me again?
Who was it? Who kept forcing her to let go? Who was it? Who made her let go? Who pushed her to this point?
A scream pierced the sky, and Sikou Xunxiang turned around blankly. Seeing Nan'er's crying and panicked face, he frowned, slowly stood up, and walked back step by step.
Who was that person in red who flashed by? Why is Le'er so frantic? Why are all of them so bloodshot? And what is that bright red stain on the ground that the rain can't wash away?
Who is it? Who is it? Who is sobbing in my arms? ...My Jin'er...my Jin'er...
Something broke; my chest felt empty, and even breathing made my heart and lungs numb with cold.
Si Kou Huanxiang's steps were light and unsteady, his eyes were dreamlike, and he cherished the face of the person in his arms with all his heart, coaxing her in a low voice: "Jin'er, don't cry, don't be afraid, brother is here."
The person in his arms was trembling, their eyes filled with panic.
This is the person I would give everything to protect, the person I would rather die than lose. How could I let her panic? Who made her show fear?
In the distance, a large number of Imperial Guards surrounded the Emperor, shouting "Protect the Emperor!"
Si Kou Xunxiang raised his eyes to look at the flashing blades all around, his eyes as cold as a thousand-year-old ice, his voice like a demon from hell demanding lives: "Kill without mercy!"