"He's the kind of person who keeps a lot of thoughts to himself. He's quiet and doesn't talk much, but when he does speak, his words are very insightful. Maybe he's a bit dull, but once you get to know him, you'll find it's a very different feeling."
“I always felt that he was lonely, always alone, without friends or joy. In the past, I simply hoped that he would be happy, and that being an invisible friend would be enough for me.”
"Sometimes I think, who can persist for ten years? I don't believe it myself. Yes, actually I didn't persist for ten years. It's just that I didn't meet anyone more unforgettable than him during those ten years."
Suddenly, colorful fireworks burst forth in the winter night sky. Red, orange, and yellow lights collided and sparked beautiful fireworks across the heavens, scattering across the entire celestial sphere. Then, like rain, they vanished in an instant. Before the smoke had even dissipated, blue, green, and purple fireworks bloomed one after another in the sky, illuminating the darkness. And so, this desolate winter night suddenly became gentle and festive.
Song Jianan stood on the basketball court, gazing with delight at the beautiful, fleeting blossoms in the sky. After the perfect performance calmly came to an end, she smiled and said, "Actually, life is like this, just like truly liking someone—plain and long."
He stood quietly under the basketball hoop, watching her smile, then jumped up and made a shooting motion. "Song Jianan, let me tell you, Su Li is actually a very good basketball player. You haven't seen him play, have you? Back then, our class played against his class and we lost to him, haha. It's a pity you always stayed in the library studying math."
Suddenly, an idea flashed through my mind: "Duan Jiachen, our newspaper is having a basketball game, can you go for me?"
"Why me?"
She said helplessly, "I only know you can play basketball. Sigh, just help me out by being there for the crowd."
"Why didn't you ask Su Li for help?" His tone was calm, but with a hint of a smile. He narrowed his eyes slightly, his smile a mixture of helplessness and relief. "Song Jianan, sometimes, if you fight for what you want, you'll never regret it for the rest of your life."
After a long silence, he lowered his head and casually kicked a pebble at his feet. The dim light at the edge of the playground obscured his expression. "Although I wasn't entirely sincere when I said this, I hope you can try."
Suddenly a strong gust of wind blew, whipping her long hair into the air. Some fine sand on the ground was blown up by the wind, blurring her vision. But Duan Jiachen's words came clearly, "Song Jianan, you went to the humanities class in your senior year of high school. I didn't see Su Li for a while. Then, about a month later, I met him on the basketball court. He was just sitting there watching."
"You know he was left-handed, but later he switched to playing with his right hand for all games. What happened during that time is still unknown to this day."
Author's Note:
Ich Lieb Dich Immer Noch So Sehr
"Time's Edge" by Sheng Li, Chapter 41 — Jinjiang Original Website [Works Library]
She had drunk a little alcohol, but didn't feel unwell. It was just that her nerves, which had been frozen in a cold period, were suddenly activated, making her extremely excited. Song Jianan sang all the way home. When she got to the entrance of the community, the security guard was watching TV. Hearing her voice, he poked his head out, then quickly withdrew. Someone inside asked, "What's wrong? What happened?"
"It's nothing, the young girl just had a bit too much to drink and was having a good time singing."
She smiled brightly, her eyes crinkling, "Uncle, Happy New Year! I'm wishing you a Happy New Year in advance!" Before she finished speaking, Duan Jiachen frowned and glared at her, then turned to the security guard and said apologetically, "Uncle, I'm sorry, she's had too much to drink."
The security guard laughed and said, "It's alright, young man. You'd better hold your girlfriend tight and be careful with the cars coming and going."
Duan Jiachen smiled and nodded. He was about to reach out and pull Song Jianan back when Song Jianan tilted her head back, glanced at Duan Jiachen, and retorted defiantly, "He's not my boyfriend."
The security guard had no other choice. He chuckled and went inside to continue watching TV, while Duan Jiachen narrowed his eyes and shook his head. No one noticed the fleeting smile on his lips.
After breaking up with Duan Jiachen downstairs, she skipped upstairs, entered the room, and eagerly turned on her computer, logged onto QQ, opened her own space, and slowly sorted out her feelings bit by bit.
"At class reunions, those familiar faces and youthful days seem like they've never left. But I'm afraid that such beautiful memories will overlap with the harsh reality. My memories are shrouded in shadows, obscuring all the beauty. So, many times, I've deliberately distanced myself from those memories and those friends with whom I once laughed. But now, when I see them again, besides guilt, I feel mostly gratitude, because they have never forgotten me."
The lingering warmth of the alcohol slowly rose to her heart, and scenes from the class reunion flashed before her eyes. An unprecedented feeling dominated her emotions, and an unprecedented courage filled her heart.
Duan Jiachen's words slowly surfaced in her mind. In a flash, she suddenly remembered a morning in her second year of high school, on the playground. Under the foggy basketball hoop, a blue and white school uniform and a basketball were faintly visible. At that time, she only glanced at it briefly and did not pay much attention. But now, when she thought about it, the person's face was already blurred, but her intuition told her that it must be Su Li.
Just like the footsteps she once followed behind him, if she had had more courage back then, if she had more opportunities now, she would definitely try her best to catch up and make up for the lost time.
Without hesitation, he lured Fang Yanyan, who was currently lurking online, to the surface. He immediately contacted Su Li, much to Fang Yanyan's dismay, saying, "You prioritize romance over friendship, Sister Jianan, wait a minute, I'll have him come online to find you."
She bit her lip, staring intently at the grayed-out avatar on QQ. Her trembling heart felt like it was being squeezed in her palm, and even her breathing became cautious. A flush of heat crept onto her face. She looked away blankly, then returned to the computer screen. Sure enough, the familiar avatar was flashing, just like her uneasy heartbeat.
He quickly opened the chat window and said, "I need to talk to you. I need your help."
"What's up?"
He took a deep breath and then typed rapidly on the keyboard, "Our newspaper is having a basketball game, and I'd like to ask for your help. I mean, if you're not busy, I wonder if you could lend a hand?"
"What does 'fill in the moment' mean?" he asked quite seriously.
Song Jianan felt that she had been defeated by herself. "In other words, there really wasn't a single person in our section who could be featured. They were mostly old, weak, sick, or disabled. The director threatened that if all else failed, even female reporters would have to be featured."
"when?"
"Tomorrow at four o'clock in the afternoon, at the university where I used to do my master's degree."
There was no response on the screen for a long time. Her hand hovered over the keyboard, about to type a message to back out, when a notification came that a file was available to accept. Upon closer inspection, it was a song, "If You Were Still Here" by Show Lo. She was a little curious, "What's wrong?"
"It's nothing. I just heard this song by chance and it's nice. You can go listen to it. By the way, I'll be there tomorrow, but I'll be a little late. Is that okay?"
She let out a long sigh of relief, realizing how idiotic and embarrassing her words had been. She gently rested her head on the desk, turned on the music player, and a soft melody drifted out, in her usual pop style. She clicked her tongue, wondering why Su Li would like to listen to such music, and then slowly replied, "No problem, thank you."
"Okay, I have something to do, I'll log off now, goodbye."
The heat from the alcohol slowly subsided. The air conditioning wasn't on in the room, and suddenly I felt the icy air. Outside the window was an endless night, and endless darkness. The chilly wind swayed the old trees that had walked alone through the years.
Song Jianan lay quietly on the table, not thinking about anything. Suddenly, she sat up with her eyes wide open and played the song "If You Were Still Here" on repeat. The melody was plain and unremarkable, but when the simple lyrics came into view, she felt inexplicably sad and heartbroken.
"Life is simple, like a movie without a script. I'm busy with work, busy with family, playing ball with all my might, and getting home late at night."
I listened to it over and over again, reversing the order, just this simple little section.
Life without him is simple, like blank pages of a calendar, slowly turned and gently closed. There are no great joys or sorrows, no dramatic ups and downs. I'm busy with work, busy with family, throwing myself into everything I do, trying my best to be happy. I go out for meals and drinks with friends, but after the excitement, I'm still left with a sense of loneliness.
And him? Over the years, that indifferent boy, now a cold and aloof man, is he just like her, busy with work, busy with family, playing basketball with all his might, and returning home late at night?
What is this song trying to tell her?
Suddenly, a red firework burst into flames in the darkness outside the window, its beautiful afterglow spreading before her eyes and reflecting on the glass. Countless fireworks followed one after another, scattering across the vast sky.
Suddenly, I felt a pang of heartache for the man who played basketball with such abandon and returned home late at night. That heartache felt like a needle prick, a sharp, piercing pain in my heart.
As the fireworks faded, endless darkness enveloped her eyes. She had never imagined, nor had she ever so desperately hoped, that the man who had painted her youth with such splendor could be happy and joyful.
I didn't sleep well one night, and kept waking up from a blank dream, then falling back into a light sleep, and the cycle repeated itself. As a result, when I woke up the next morning, I had dark circles under my eyes.
There was always a sense of joy in my heart, but there was also a faint unease. After so many years of quiet life, a corner that was not easily noticed was suddenly cracked because of Su Li's appearance. In an instant, everything was ruined.
When Song Jianan went to work at the newspaper office, the veteran reporters were clearly all excited about the basketball game, completely lacking the usual tense and serious atmosphere. Song Jianan was also absent-mindedly writing articles and making tea. Before 3:30, someone from the next office shouted, "The game is starting! The game is starting! Place your bets! Let's see who will win between Focus and Dacheng!"
"Who will emerge victorious?"
"Please, it should be 'who wins!' Journalists need to be careful with their words!"
The office had never been so lively. The director, who was in his forties, dribbled the ball clumsily like a primary school student. Several veteran reporters took off their suits and leather shoes and changed into sportswear. A female reporter laughed and said, "Look at you, you can't even zip up your zippers. Let's see if you can still run." Everyone burst into laughter.
The young reporter sitting next to Song Jianan held up her phone and shouted, "My boyfriend is coming right away. He graduated from a sports school." Everyone exclaimed in surprise, and she glanced at her phone, feeling both nervous and expectant.
I wonder if he will arrive as scheduled.
The outdoor basketball court at the university was packed with people. Although the sky looked much darker and the sun was hidden behind thick, gray clouds, the air was cold and damp, as if there was a harbinger of snow.
But all of this did not diminish the intense atmosphere of the game. In fact, it was more like the situation was completely one-sided. The Focus team only had three players who could actually play basketball, while the Big City team was full of basketball experts. Soon the score was rising sharply, making the spectators feel a little sorry for the players.
While keeping track of the game, Song Jianan anxiously looked at her phone, wanting to call Su Li, but she put it away after pressing the contact in the phone book. Zeng Shuyi, who was next to her, turned around and looked at her, "Song Jianan, what are you doing? You look so distracted."
Before she could finish speaking, a commotion arose behind her, and the crowd naturally dispersed. Song Jianan naturally looked back, and there stood a man in a blue and white tracksuit in front of her, smiling slightly, "Sorry I'm a little late, are you still making it?"
Perhaps because he had run all the way, Su Li was still slightly out of breath, with a hidden smile in his eyes. His gaze swept across the room, and the sky-blue stripes on his tracksuit collar accentuated his fair face. His short hair slipped down to his eyes in the wind, creating a vivid contrast between light and shadow, making him look exactly like Su Li from his youthful high school days.
Time seemed to flow backward in space, and for the first time, she saw the gloomy boy in the tracksuit. This time, she saw herself clearly reflected in his eyes.
With lowered eyes and a gentle smile, their eyes met with tender affection.
"Use one of our players who is very good at breaking through to the basket, while I try to shoot three-pointers, quickly run to open spots, and then pass the ball to shoot. In addition, we need to rely on fast breaks. Remember to be fast and use speed to wear down the opponent. At the same time, players who are not good at this game should move around more to confuse the opponent's defense."
"When defending, I suggest using zone defense. This can maximize the effectiveness of the defense. If you are guarding one player at a time, players who are not good at the game will inevitably get beaten. At this time, you can rely on zone defense to help defend."
"Just play like this. If you have the ball, pass it to me as much as possible. Got it? Okay, get on the court."
Looking at the scoreboard in front of him, which clearly showed the advantages and disadvantages, and the obvious gap in strength between the team members, he realized that the possibility of a comeback was extremely slim. He just wanted to try his best to lose gracefully, and he let out a long sigh of relief.
Song Jianan looked at Su Li, feeling a mix of nervousness and excitement as she watched him play basketball for the first time. Zeng Shuyi kept exclaiming, "Song Jianan, where did you find such a perfect man?" She glared at her fiercely, but couldn't hide the smile on her face.
As soon as the whistle blew, she heard Su Li call her name. Before she could react, his hand was already outstretched, and the tracksuit jacket was gently draped over her hand. "Hold this for me."
I remember standing in the stands on the playground, seeing girls carrying their sportswear, their faces beaming with smiles, their eyes following that one and only person. Their youthful, innocent feelings slowly blossomed as the boys ran, jumped, and shot hoops.
Sometimes she would feel envious, and smile to herself. Then she would quietly shift her gaze from the girl's clothes in her left hand and the drink in her right, and then walk away silently, hearing a series of crisp shouts and cheers from each other.
At that moment, she would hope that someone would stand in front of her and hand her a tracksuit, and she would be overjoyed and could only hold onto his clothes tightly, as if she were holding onto his hand and a lifetime together.
And now, in her hand, lies Su Li's tracksuit quietly, the throbbing that was ten years overdue, the scene that was ten years overdue, is playing out like a drama.
All she could do was clench her fists tightly, trying to find the color that had once belonged to her secret crush amidst the blue and white stripes.
Song Jianan had never known that Su Li was such a good basketball player. He made an accurate three-pointer as soon as he entered the game, winning cheers from the crowd. He was tall and agile, and his running, jumping and every move he made was elegant and graceful.
She was so mesmerized by the sight that Zeng Shuyi next to her pinched her arm hard, saying, "He's so handsome! He's just as good-looking as the basketball heartthrob on my high school team. My god, he's practically a real-life Rukawa Kaede!"
"Zeng Shuyi, don't pull me, it hurts."
"Am I excited? No way!"
The score was slowly rising, and everyone's eyes followed the cheers and shouts of the people on the court. Su Li seemed to be cooperating well with his teammates and playing very easily. With fast breaks, layups, and three-pointers, he almost became the focus of the entire court. But no one knew that his left hand was a little sore.
An old injury suddenly started hurting again. Su Li quietly gripped his left wrist and shook it hard twice. Through the dense crowd, he could still see Song Jianan standing silently to the side, holding his tracksuit.
A complex and inexplicable emotion welled up in his heart for no apparent reason. Suddenly, the whistle blew to end the game, and he breathed a long sigh of relief. The score was still slightly behind, and the great comeback that everyone had been looking forward to did not come because of his arrival.
Many people came over to pat him on the shoulder and comfort him, but he had no regrets at all. Basketball is a team sport, not an individual performance. He felt at ease having done his best.
He didn't want to hear words of comfort from others; he just wanted to hear someone say thank you.
"What a pity, he didn't win." Zeng Shuyi shook her head in disappointment. "It would have been better if he had played earlier."
Song Jianan took out a bottle of mineral water from the box and said with a smile, "Alright, participation is what matters. Besides, the fact that we didn't lose to the singles digits instead of the tens digits is already a huge relief for our director. He definitely won't be deliberately late for the meeting tomorrow."