Xiao Qiqi looked at the thin envelope and sneered for the first time today. Was this a scene from a TV drama? She pulled out the check from the envelope, looked at the six zeros after the 5, and laughed out loud. Madam Chen remained unmoved. Xiao Qiqi laughed for a while before saying, "Madam Chen, you are wrong. My relationship with Chen Yuanxing is not worth 5 million."
After speaking, he stood up, put on a serious face, and said to Madam Chen, "I have a request. Please give me some time."
Mrs. Chen finally raised her hand, smoothed her short hair at her temples, and nodded. "Three months, is that alright?"
“That’s long enough.” Xiao Qiqi’s voice was somewhat unsteady. “I have one more request.”
"you say."
"Never let Yuanxing know about this, never." Although she knew it was pointless to warn him, she couldn't help but remind him. She would rather he resent her for the rest of his life than let him suffer from the pain of his family.
Xiao Qiqi was surprised by her own calmness. She calmly got into Madam Chen's car and returned along the same route. The peach blossoms were still in full bloom, with tender green buds spreading out from behind the flowers. Pedestrians in spring clothes hurried past on the roadside, and an old man in a thick sweater called out to his dog that had run away. It was still so vibrant, with spring flowers in bloom.
Xiao Qiqi sat under a beautiful peach tree, watching the sunset sink into the clouds with its last rays of color, the earth shrouded in layers of hazy mist. It was at this moment that Chen Yuanxing called, his voice still warm and cheerful, making people smile involuntarily, "Qiqi, what are you doing?"
"Look at the clouds and sky merging into one color, the sun setting in the west." Xiao Qiqi heard her own voice sound the same, perhaps she had been mentally prepared, knowing all along that happiness was only fleeting, so she wasn't so sad when it was about to pass. Just like we watch the sunset every day without feeling old, that's because we are still young. If one day we are old, heartbroken, standing under the sunset, will we, like the ancients, lament, "The sunset is infinitely beautiful, but it's nearing dusk"? Therefore, overflowing pain is a form of acceptance.
Xiao Qiqi listened patiently to Chen Yuanxing's sweet words, then casually coaxed him to hang up the phone. Slowly, the smile on her face faded. Did she really not deserve happiness?
Every time Chen Yuanxing returned from a business trip, he would always report the date to Xiao Qiqi a day or two in advance, and Xiao Qiqi always genuinely enjoyed these surprises. This time was no different. Xiao Qiqi played with a few seashells that Chen Yuanxing had brought back, which he said he had spent a day collecting on the beach, and held them to his ear to listen to the waves. Chen Yuanxing then exclaimed dramatically, "Xiao Qiqi, the waves are so loud! A storm is coming! Wow, let me take you away!"
Xiao Qiqi chuckled. "Chen Yuanxing, the storm is really coming, but where can we escape to?"
Xiao Qiqi took out a real estate poster and asked, "Yuanxing, is this the residential complex developed by your company?"
Chen Yuanxing had tomatoes all over his face, so Xiao Qiqi leaned in and gently cleaned them for him with her tongue. Her tenderness almost made Chen Yuanxing forget about the dirt on his hands and try to take action, but Xiao Qiqi quickly jumped away, playfully pinching his cheek! She then continued, holding up the poster, "I want to buy a house. Does your company offer internal discounts?"
"What? Qiqi, you're buying a house? Our new house?" Chen Yuanxing wiped his hands, his mind immediately turning to buying a house. He was excited: "That's great! I'll call right away and ask if there's an insider price. How about we buy a small house? Two bedrooms and a living room will be enough. We can live in one room and use the rest as a study." Chen Yuanxing's mind was racing, and he rattled off everything Xiao Qiqi wanted to say.
Xiao Qiqi nodded quickly, "It would be fine to buy a small two-bedroom apartment. The neighborhood is nice, and the apartment is just what I want. But it's not for the two of us; it's for myself!"
"Why? Why won't you let me stay?"
Xiao Qiqi deliberately said seriously, "Chen Yuanxing, I'm not stupid. If I buy a house myself, it will be my own property in the future. Why should I buy it with you? What if you dump me in the future and then force me to return the other half of the house to you every day, just like before?"
Chen Yuanxing didn't care about these things at all, and he wasn't sure what to do with them. Hearing Xiao Qiqi say this, he always went along with her, so he said, "Whatever you want, just write your name on it. I won't fight you for it!"
"That's more like it!" Xiao Qiqi said seriously on purpose. "You little brat, why are you getting involved in my house purchase? I'm telling you, you won't get a single penny!"
"Okay, okay, it's fine without mine. It's best to use my money and put it in your name." Chen Yuanxing nodded hurriedly, put his arm around Xiao Qiqi, and started to move his hands and feet around.
"Hey, don't move, I haven't finished talking yet," Xiao Qiqi pushed him.
"We can talk about it tomorrow. It's just buying a house in Huayuan, isn't that easy? If I don't have enough money, I'll sell myself." Chen Yuanxing wasn't about to let it go. He hadn't seen Xiao Qiqi for a week and couldn't hold back any longer.
Xiao Qiqi had no choice but to let him continue his antics, her heart pounding as he kneaded her.
The next day, Xiao Qiqi urged Chen Yuanxing to inquire about the company's internal purchase program. She needed to start planning for her future. With housing prices rising so rapidly, she wanted to find a place to live while she could still afford it. Even if she got hurt someday, she could retreat home to heal her wounds, unlike her current situation of being homeless. Her savings weren't much; she calculated that at market price, it would only cover the down payment. If she had access to an internal purchase quota at Huayuan, the price would be a third lower than market value, allowing her to save on renovation costs. She wasn't in a rush to pay the rest of the mortgage each month.
Chen Yuanxing didn't pay much attention to her changes and indeed managed to get an internal housing purchase quota. However, the procedures were a bit troublesome. The quota belonged to Chen Yuanxing, but Xiao Qiqi insisted on buying it in her own name. Chen Yuanxing had no choice but to call his uncle, using his previous connections. The house purchase and contract signing went smoothly, but when it came to the loan application, Chen Yuanxing finally realized something was wrong. "Why do I need a loan? That house is only a little over 400,000 yuan. I remember that even without my current salary, Lao Zhou gives me a lot of dividends every year. Surely I have that much money?" All of Chen Yuanxing's bank cards were in Xiao Qiqi's hands; in short, he had no idea how much money he had.
Xiao Qiqi continued filling out the contract: "You are you, and I am me. I'm just keeping your passbook and card safe for you."
"What do you mean 'yours' and 'mine'? Aren't we family already?" Chen Yuanxing was clearly dissatisfied. "Xiao Qiqi, what exactly are you doing?"
"Don't you know what I'm doing?" Xiao Qiqi looked at him coldly. "Chen Yuanxing, don't go too far!"
Chen Yuanxing was surprised. "Huh, Qiqi, what did I do wrong? You said you'd put your name on the deed when you bought the house, so I did. What did I say? I just don't understand, even at this point, why are you still making such a clear distinction between us? Do you really think I'd hold you accountable for the money of a run-down house?"
Xiao Qiqi scoffed, "These days, you can't find any kind of person, who knows!"
"Qiqi, you?" Chen Yuanxing's smile vanished. "Why do I find you've become increasingly sarcastic and critical lately?"
"I haven't changed. It's you, young master, who's seen too much of the world and your tastes have changed, haven't you?" Xiao Qiqi sneered. "You've been complaining about me more and more lately when you come home. Do you think I don't remember?"
"Tch, I was just teasing you because I was worried you were bored. What are you complaining about?"
"You know in your heart whether it's true or not!" Xiao Qiqi said, picked up the filled-out form, and walked towards the counter, ignoring Chen Yuanxing.
Chen Yuanxing watched her tall figure from behind, pursing his lips and remaining silent.
45. The Pain of Loss (Part Two)
"Qiqi, where are my socks?" Chen Yuanxing rummaged through the cabinet haphazardly.
"In the second compartment." Xiao Qiqi turned over. He was attending a ribbon-cutting ceremony today, and he didn't have to work on the weekend.
"No!" Chen Yuanxing flipped through the pages, his eyes suddenly stopping. What was this? A black leather notebook? Why did it look so familiar? He flipped through it discreetly, then remembered—wasn't this always on top of the cabinet? How did it end up in the cabinet, tucked away among the clothes? He hesitated for a moment, then opened the first page. The paper was crumpled, stained with tears, and some parts were still damp. Chen Yuanxing's heart sank. He quickly closed the notebook. No, no, it couldn't be.
"Still haven't found it?" Xiao Qiqi got up irritably, jumped off the bed with a "thump," rushed to Chen Yuanxing, and pulled a pair of white socks from the closet. "You never seem to know where you've eaten your meals! You can't do anything! All you do is talk about where you're supposed to go! Can't you see what's in front of you?" Her eyes suddenly fell on Chen Yuanxing's hand, which he hadn't had time to remove, and her previous composure turned into panic: "Ah, I put my old English notes here! No wonder I couldn't find them for days!" As she spoke, she pulled out the black leather notebook, hugged it tightly, and gave Chen Yuanxing a fawning smile.
Chen Yuanxing kept looking into her eyes until she looked away at the balcony. "What time did you go to bed last night?" He vaguely felt that she should have just gone to bed not long ago.
"No, it's not that late. I was watching TV in the living room and forgot what time it was. I didn't go to sleep until dawn." Xiao Qiqi continued to dodge the question. "Hey, aren't you in a hurry? Why aren't you leaving yet?"
"Really? Watching TV in the living room?" Chen Yuanxing opened the balcony door, revealing an ashtray full of cigarette butts, the lingering smoke still pungent. "And where's the cigarette?"
"I smoked a few." Xiao Qiqi's face turned cold. "Chen Yuanxing, what do you mean? Why are you being so sarcastic so early in the morning? Just say what you want to say!"
"It's nothing." Chen Yuanxing closed his eyes, trying to suppress his emotions, and held up the white socks in his hand. "I just wanted to say that white socks shouldn't be worn with black leather shoes."
"Tch, why make such a fuss? Black and white is just right, why are you being so particular?" Xiao Qiqi yawned dismissively, then slumped back onto the bed with her laptop. "Just make do!"
Chen Yuanxing gazed at the woman's face, still fair and delicate, though her eyelids seemed slightly swollen. Had she cried last night? For whom? For that notebook? Chen Yuanxing smiled bitterly. Had life been too smooth, and now heaven was starting to take it back? Why did the longer they were together, the less he felt he could hold onto her heart?
When Chen Yuanxing came home in the evening, he clutched his stomach and shouted as he entered, "Qiqi, I'm starving! Has anyone cooked dinner?"
Xiao Qiqi grunted from inside the room and said in a muffled voice, "I didn't make it! You can eat outside, why did you come back and bother me?"
Chen Yuanxing took off his suit, changed his shoes, and walked in with a grin. He naturally put his arm around Xiao Qiqi's waist from behind: "Sister, I love your cooking. I only enjoy eating when you cook."
"I won't do it!" Xiao Qiqi coldly pushed his hand away and quickly closed a webpage. "You can have the cookies yourself."
Chen Yuanxing's enthusiasm turned to cold water as he peered at her face. "What's wrong? You have tear stains. Have you been crying? Who made you angry?"
"You!" Xiao Qiqi said irritably, "All you do is make me cook, are you a pig? Or do you really want to be my servant?" Saying this, she pushed Chen Yuanxing away, stood up, and stormed into the kitchen. "I'll serve you for the rest of my life! I want to find someone to serve me!"
Chen Yuanxing sat down at the table in surprise and sighed. Was it the hot and dry weather or his bad mood that made them always arguing for the past month? Why did Xiao Qiqi complain so much over such a small thing? Was it because he hadn't done enough or something else?
Her eyes slowly drifted to the computer screen. What webpage had she just hastily closed? Curiosity triumphed over reason, and she opened the webpage she had browsed. It was a blog called "Summer Memories." Hesitating, she opened each post one by one, her expression slowly changing. Two months had passed, and each post—some filled with beautiful memories, some mourning a reunion, some with sorrowful longing, some with weariness of the present life—none of them expressed the warmth and happiness of her current life. Even intimacy had become a torment of unrequited love… Chen Yuanxing's heart grew colder and colder. So that's how it was!
The chat icon kept flashing. Opening it, I saw a conversation from "Basket": "Really tired of him and want to break up? What a great guy!"
"What a joke! So naive! If it weren't for their good family background, they would have been kicked out long ago, but now I don't see any hope for them. They have no ambition whatsoever!"
"That's not the main reason, is it?"
"Yes, perhaps the longer it goes on, the more agonizing it becomes. I never knew it was so difficult to live together if we didn't love each other. I thought I could just give in."
"Qiqi, don't talk nonsense. This is the third time I've heard you say you want to break up. Young Master Chen is such a good man. If you dare to dump him, I won't accept it. Love? Where in the world is there love? It's all about eating and dressing."
"But I miss those days filled with love, and I've made up my mind..."
The rest of the conversation consisted entirely of the basket shouting and trying to stop and comfort the diners…
Chen Yuanxing could no longer hold back. He ripped the notebook off and threw it to the ground, then clenched his fist and slammed it on the table.
Xiao Qiqi was startled and ran in from the kitchen with a spatula, looking at the notebook on the floor: "Young Master, what's wrong with you now?"
Chen Yuanxing stared at her coldly, as if he wanted to pierce her with his eyes, but Xiao Qiqi laughed and said provocatively, "What, are you clenching your fists to hit someone?"
Looking at that familiar, beautiful face, Chen Yuanxing said stiffly, "I'm going out to eat!" He hurriedly stepped on his laptop and almost fell. So this is what heartbreak feels like.
"Yuanxing, what's wrong with you?" Xiao Qiqi's expression finally changed, and she hesitated, "...You didn't see something, did you?"
Chen Yuanxing steadied himself by the door, a cold smile playing on his lips: "Is there anything you're afraid I'll see?"
"No!" Xiao Qiqi shook her head, chuckled, and looked firmly at Chen Yuanxing: "I have a clear conscience, what do I have to be afraid of?"
Chen Yuanxing shook his head. If Xiao Qiqi bravely admitted that she had something in mind, he would really suspect that she was running away because of fear and hesitation. But now, the more she denied and avoided him, the more he couldn't put down the heavy stone in his heart. "Are you sure you didn't lie to me?"
"No, absolutely not!" Xiao Qiqi shook his head vigorously.
"Who did you meet on April 13th?"
Xiao Qiqi's expression changed. She looked down. How did he know? But looking at the notebook that had been thrown to the ground, she finally decided to take a gamble. "No, there was no one there." She looked up at Chen Yuanxing's colder eyes in a panic and whispered, "I ran into a classmate I haven't seen for many years."
"A classmate?" Chen Yuanxing's smile was now tinged with bloodlust. "What's his name? Have we only met once?"
"What's his name? Aha, you don't know him anyway, right? I...we really only met, talked, and didn't do anything else, absolutely nothing!"
No? Really not? Chen Yuanxing recalled that he had indeed been away on a business trip those few days. One night he called her, but her phone was off all night. Later, she explained that her phone had run out of battery and she had forgotten to turn it on, which he hadn't thought much of at the time. But he clearly remembered that her phone was always on 24 hours a day; she had two spare batteries. Why would she lie to him at a time like this?
"His name is Xia Xuan, right?" Chen Yuanxing asked bitterly, his low, hoarse voice carrying an inexplicable sadness. "You saw Xia Xuan that day, didn't you?" The blog clearly stated that he went into a hotel with XX...
"You read my log?" Xiao Qiqi was no longer flustered, but her eyes were filled with anger: "Chen Yuanxing, how could you be so despicable as to look at other people's privacy without their consent?"
"Privacy? Is it just privacy for me, this fool?" Chen Yuanxing's sadness turned into mockery. "Qiqi, in the end, you don't love me, do you? If you don't love me, if you're tired of me, you can just tell me directly. There's no need to torture yourself like this." Chen Yuanxing stretched out his cold fingers and traced them on Xiao Qiqi's increasingly pale face. "Qiqi, I told you that if you ever get tired of me, you should just tell me, and I will leave. Have you forgotten?"
Have you forgotten? Have you really forgotten? Xiao Qiqi forced back the agonizing pain in her heart, "...I haven't forgotten."
"So now you're telling me you're tired of me and want me to leave, right?"
"Yes!" She couldn't say any more. If she said even one more word, she wouldn't be able to control herself and would throw herself into his arms and cry. Would that hurt him? At this moment, she would rather hurt herself.
“…Okay, I’ll leave.” Chen Yuanxing looked at Xiao Qiqi’s face expectantly, but there was no trace of lingering affection on her face, only resolute determination. Was it so cruel? Then let the cruelty stay with him.
The days that followed were peaceful. Chen Yuanxing was not as difficult to get rid of as Xiao Qiqi had imagined, and Xiao Qiqi did not need to continue to find excuses to argue or anything else.
He became increasingly busy, returning home late at night, sometimes fully sober, sometimes completely drunk. But he no longer clung to her like before, cuddling and cuddling her affectionately. Instead, he obediently lay down on the sofa bed in the next room. In the mornings, he quietly got ready for work. Each time, Xiao Qiqi resisted the urge to open her eyes to see his lonely departing figure, to hear his steady footsteps as he walked down the stairs, to touch the lingering good morning kiss he had secretly given her. Tears repeatedly soaked her clothes. Her clenched nails drew blood from her palms again, but there was no one to gently soothe them anymore. She had to bear the excruciating pain alone.
The house was completed quickly, a simply furnished one. Chen Yuanxing helped her find people to decorate it according to her own design drawings, and everything was done meticulously, as long as Xiao Qiqi provided any suggestions. He accompanied her to the market to buy every piece of furniture. His calm demeanor was almost oppressive, without the usual playful bickering or arguments over differing opinions. He was like a statue, a moving statue that would carry things for her.
Everything was over, and another two months passed. The house could be moved into after a few days of airing out. Xiao Qiqi began packing his things, his own and his separate suitcases, stuffing them in little by little, then taking them out, touching them, and putting them back. It seemed as if he wanted to stuff his entire heart into his suitcase in a single day.
“Your bankbook and all your luggage are here.” Xiao Qiqi pointed to several suitcases. “I’ve calculated the money; I’ve withdrawn the living expenses for the past three years. Would you like to see the account book?”
"No need." Chen Yuanxing smoked one cigarette after another fiercely. He stubbed it out, stood up, opened all the boxes, and only took out the bankbooks, cards, and some documents, stuffing them into his handbag. "I don't want any of them. Just throw them all away."
Xiao Qiqi froze, staring blankly at him, "...You don't want any of it?"
"No, I don't want it anymore!" Chen Yuanxing forced a smile. "Just consider it as letting go of some memories. Qiqi..." He slowly walked over and gently kissed her cheek one last time. "Be happy, goodbye."
"...Goodbye." She answered blankly, watching him walk out, open the door, and that was it, never to be seen again.
Heartbroken, he really turned back! Chen Yuanxing turned around and took out a bunch of keys from his pocket: "Keys, you don't need them anymore, do you?" Xiao Qiqi's heart ached even more, "Throw them away, I don't need them anymore."
“Okay.” Chen Yuanxing hesitated, his fingers hovering in his pocket, but ultimately didn’t take them out. “I’ll keep a set of keys to the new house. If… you lose the keys and can’t get in one day, call me.”
"Okay." Xiao Qiqi answered almost without hesitation, secretly pinching her palm. Was she still unable to give it up?
Another departure.
Xiao Qiqi sat in the messy room, gazing at the chaos. His things were everywhere, nothing else. Her own belongings had long been moved to the new house. This place held three years of memories between them, all of them carrying his scent. She went through each item: rabbit fur slippers, wolf-print underwear, a cool-toned suit, a floral shirt, her vain face wash and perfume, the razor she used every day, the nail clippers she used to trim her nails, the big teddy bear she bought for him, the toothbrush still smelling of his lips and teeth… Each item pierced her fragile heart, and the tears she had held back for so long finally burst forth in a loud sob.