The most foolish in the world

Chapter 43

"Sir, your divine beauty needs no further explanation. Those who have seen it will know it is beyond description. It is said that the day you arrived at the Joyful Day, the red-sleeved beauties across the street instantly changed. What do you think? Those flamboyant courtesans all became reserved, walking without showing their feet, laughing without showing their teeth, truly more virtuous and gentle than a respectable woman!"

"What about the guests? Surely the men weren't bewitched too?"

The question itself revealed the speaker to be from out of town. All the Beijing residents present turned to look at the man who had spoken, their eyes filled with displeasure. What nonsense! This gentleman was a banished immortal; how could such filthy words be used to insult him?

The man broke out in a cold sweat under the hostile gazes of the crowd, unsure of what he had said wrong. Fortunately, Old Zhang smoothed things over.

"Ignorance is no excuse. Sir, if you were to meet the master, you would know how inappropriate your words were. The master is of noble character and exceptional appearance. His words, actions, and even his attire have always been a model for everyone in the city. Now that he favors the Joyful Heaven, everyone should follow his example to avoid revealing their own shallowness."

"Then why did you go to the Land of Bliss, sir?"

This question seemed to voice everyone's thoughts. Old Zhang smiled mysteriously, shook his paper fan, and drawled, "According to exclusive sources, Qingfeng-jun of Huanxitian's new work is based on you, sir, and will depict your love affairs..."

The room erupted in uproar. Gongye Bai had been single for many years, and his marriage was always the focus of everyone's attention. The Angel of Joy's move had undoubtedly struck at the heart of the gossip crowd, no wonder the Red Sleeve Pavilion had collapsed so quickly in just one day.

A figure in light colors, who had been sitting in the corner, leisurely got up, walked to the counter with his hands behind his back, and slapped down a silver ingot.

"Oh, that's rare! Manager Fan is actually paying the bill?"

Fan Qingbo gave a knowing look and said lazily, "It's just returning the favor."

The shopkeeper weighed the silver in his hand, then smiled and pushed it back, saying, "Shopkeeper Fan, you're being too polite. Let alone this little bit of tea money, it's not impossible for us to offer free tea from now on."

Fan Qingbo raised his eyelids slightly, silently put the silver back into his sleeve, and then tore off a blank piece of paper from the back of the ledger. "Write a receipt."

It's all in black and white, a written agreement serves as proof. Fan Qingbo smiled, "Pleasant to cooperate."

She subtly spoiled the novel's plot for Xiaoyao Tea House, and the tea house promoted Huanxitian's new book—a mutually beneficial arrangement, so why not?

Walking along the road back to Huaxiang Lane in the cool evening breeze, Fan Qingbo had been caught in a series of unexpected events since her impulsive marriage proposal. The betrothal gifts, the return gifts, the wedding date setting—all followed in quick succession. Five days later, on the seventh day of the seventh lunar month, was the wedding day, the day before Zhou Zice was to marry Miss Xu. What was initially just a coincidence was interpreted by others as her being resentful, competitive, and seeking revenge.

Perhaps these people are used to the trope of men being unfaithful and women being devoted, and they can't accept that she's so quick to leave him, hence their speculation.

However, they overestimated her. Her emotions were pitifully barren, far from possessing such noble sentiments. She was incapable of anything like dying for a man, engaging in self-destructive or revenge-driven behavior. Counting on her fingers, she was twenty-two this year, with only twenty-four years left until her natural death. She was too busy enjoying life to waste her energy on a man who didn't belong to her.

As for the scholar, his magically unpredictable thought process, which was always out of Earth's service area, made all her concerns insignificant.

Marry him! Why not? Where can you find a man who's loyal, charming, and warm in bed? Even if he doesn't love her, his sense of duty won't allow him to betray her. Even if she doesn't love him, she still likes him, not to mention she's been eyeing him for a long time. She'd already changed her mind; love, that fickle thing, is never a necessity in marriage.

Although it was somewhat despicable, as if she were using the scholar, she genuinely wanted a child.

The thought of her desolate old age after Fan Bing married still haunts her. She thinks, if she has a child now, she won't have to worry about being alone for the next twenty-odd years. Then, when the child grows up, she can die gracefully—what a perfect ending.

And so, in Fan Qingbo's beautiful dream, the poor scholar completed a three-stage leap from "bed warmer" to "childbearer" and then to "child's father who is used and then discarded."

"Heavens above, earth below! I don't want to live anymore, waaaaaaah..."

Upon entering the house, Fan Qingbo heard such a wail. He stopped in his tracks and turned to retreat the way he came, but Fan Bing, quick as a flash, pounced on him and grabbed his leg, crying out in a hoarse voice, "Master!"

"When I say I'm having a seizure, don't wail like I'm about to marry you off to a stepmother, okay?"

Ever since he found out she had agreed to be with the scholar, this guy has started to cry, make a scene, and threaten suicide every day.

She kicked him away and walked straight to the dining table in the hall, sitting down to eat. Well, despite the commotion, he still did everything he was supposed to do, which was why she could tolerate his episodes. Suddenly remembering the scholar who had no servants and often fainted from hunger, Fan Qingbo casually said, "Come and eat, we'll send dinner to the neighbor across the hall later."

After a while of silence, he looked up and was startled to see Fan Bing holding a kitchen knife to his neck.

"Master, if you marry that beast, I will die in front of you!"

Fan Qingbo lowered his head and took a sip of soup before saying, "If you're so capable, why don't you point the blade at yourself instead of the handle?"

Upon hearing this, Fan Bing threw down the kitchen knife and ran out, only to return a moment later.

"Rather than be abandoned by my master, I'd rather hang myself right here in front of you!"

She looked up and saw Fan Bing standing on a chair, his head encased in a rope loop, gazing at her with sorrow and despair, tears streaming down his face as he said, "That way, at least my master will remember me forever..."

This scene is undeniably poignant, yet the lover's heart remains as hard as iron.

"If you're so capable, don't cut the rope down to just a single thread and leave it hanging."

Fan Qingbo buried her head in her food, then heard Fan Bing dash out again. This time, a long time passed, and he didn't return until she finished her meal. She put down her chopsticks and called out, "Having an episode?" No one answered. What's wrong with this guy now? She frowned, got up, and walked outside. She searched the front yard, the kitchen, and his room, but couldn't find him.

Suddenly hearing a splash of water, her heart skipped a beat, and she ran to the backyard.

He ran to the well, looked down, and sure enough, saw Fan Bing struggling and bobbing inside. Spitting out water, he said with difficulty, "Master... if you... then I'll die before you... glug..."

Fan Qingbo stared at him for a long time, then curled her lips into a slight smile, "You can die slowly, I won't bother you."

He turned and left without looking back. At the bottom of the well, Fan Bing straightened up, kicked at the knee-deep water, leaned against the well wall with one hand, and fell into deep thought. Hitting a wall, swallowing gold, taking poison, slitting his throat, hanging himself, throwing himself into a well—what other way hadn't he tried to die?

When Fan Qingbo carried the food box to the opposite door, the scholar was writing wedding invitations. When he saw her, he stood up with a look of surprise and delight.

"Miss Fan."

What a bookworm. Who calls their fiancée "Miss, Miss"? Fan Qingbo put down the food box and invited him to eat. Then she went to her desk, saw a stack of wedding invitations, and frowned, saying, "Don't you have any relatives? Why do you need so many invitations?"

He casually flipped to one of the invitations, then stared wide-eyed and quickly flipped through the rest.

"Fool, are you going to host a banquet for the entire Qingmo Workshop?"

The scholar was taken aback and said, "They all say it's your maternal family..."

"Pah!" Before the word "fart" could even leave her lips, her eyes met his and she spat again, but it didn't make much difference. His face still showed disapproval, but Fan Qingbo didn't care anymore. "You believe what they say? I'm clearly an orphan, where would I get so many family members? These guys are obviously here to scam food and drink! They're just trying to scam you, you idiot!"

The scholar frowned, somewhat confused. "What is 'stupid speed'?"

"Foolish, rich, come quick!" Fan Qingbo said irritably, then suddenly remembered something, "Do you have a lot of money?"