The most foolish in the world

Chapter 52

The first time of the 35th Silver Scholar

The next day, when Fan Qingbo woke up, she found herself still in the cave. The firewood had long since burned to ashes, and the scholar was nowhere to be seen. His cloth bag was still beside her, and his robe was draped over her shoulders. So—he went out and ran naked?

He moved his still somewhat sore limbs, got up, took out a plain handkerchief from the scholar's cloth bag, and washed his face with the spring water.

Stepping outside the cave, she cleared her throat and was pleased to find that the voice-changing drug had worn off and her own voice was back. Surrounded by birdsong and the fragrance of flowers, she took several deep breaths of the post-rain mountain air, and felt completely refreshed. Last night, she had finally and gloriously ended her single life. Although there was no wedding dress or honeymoon, from now on, she was a married woman. The thought still felt unreal.

No wonder, when she woke up on her wedding night to find her bedside empty, she almost wondered if the night before had been nothing but a dream.

Fan Qingbo, growing impatient waiting at the cave entrance, decided to take advantage of the rare misty mountain scenery to do some morning exercises. After finishing a set of exercises, he then entertained himself by practicing Tai Chi from memory, imagining himself as a reclusive hermit in the mountains, feeling quite pleased with himself.

When the scholar returned, he saw a woman with flowing sleeves and disheveled hair moving slowly and awkwardly at the cave entrance. Startled, he immediately dropped what he was holding and rushed over, crying, "Wife, what's wrong? Wife, wake up!"

Fan Qingbo was suddenly shaken, feeling dizzy and unable to speak clearly. "Let go!" He forcefully broke free from the scholar possessed by the roaring horse, and upon looking closely, he felt dizzy again. "Am I still half asleep? When did you become a monk, scholar?"

Seeing that she seemed to have returned to normal, the scholar breathed a sigh of relief. He then looked at his Taoist robe and replied, "This was borrowed from Taiqing Temple. Oh, right—" He turned around and picked up the thing he had just tossed aside, presenting it to Fan Qingbo like a treasure, "Wife, have some breakfast."

She guessed that he must have gone out to find food early in the morning, but she never expected that he would go directly to Taiqing Temple.

While enjoying the unique vegetarian meal served at the royal Taoist temple, Fan Qingbo couldn't help but ask, "Didn't the people at Taiqing Temple say anything?" Trespassing into forbidden territory and getting a free meal? How could it be so easy? Could the scholar have done something strange?

The scholar swallowed his food politely before replying, "I did."

That was the last time.

Fan Qingbo was exasperated with this man who was naturally inconsistent in his approach to detail, knowing when to elaborate and when to stop, yet giving irrelevant and unpredictable answers. Resigned, he continued to ask, "What did you say?"

The scholar thought for a moment, then hesitated, "I've said a lot."

"Just tell me the important things." Why did she suddenly have a bad feeling?

"In terms of importance, there are roughly two sentences. The first is the question asked by Master Xuanqing in the first sentence, 'What is the Dao? What is benevolence?' The second is his last sentence, 'Your Excellency has considerable wisdom; would you be interested in joining my Daoist sect?'" He paused, fearing she might misunderstand, and added, "Of course, I resolutely refused. I took the food and left."

Sure enough, he did something strange. She could almost picture him, dressed only in his undergarments, discussing scriptures with that legendary enlightened master. Was it true that anyone connected to the royal family was no normal person, or was it just that this bookish, idiotic type always encountered people who didn't play by the rules?

Well, the former, I guess; the latter even implicated her.

Seeing her lost in thought, the scholar assumed she didn't believe him and hurriedly grabbed her hand, saying, "I have absolutely no interest in becoming a monk, really!"

Fan Qingbo snapped out of her daze, took out one hand and patted his face, soothingly saying, "I know, I can tell from your performance last night."

Last night… memories flooded back, and the scholar froze instantly, his face turning red, starting from his neck. Seeing this, Fan Qingbo asked in surprise, “You’ve already done it, why are you being shy now? Anyone who didn’t know better would think this was your first time.”

The scholar's face grew even redder, and after a long pause, he managed to stammer out, "As the saying goes, 'one should not speak of what is improper.' How can such private matters of the boudoir be spoken of like this..."

Fan Qingbo ignored him, got up and went back to the cave to pack her things and prepare to go home. The scholar followed closely behind, starting to talk about women's precepts, virtues, and morality, speaking eloquently and endlessly, his embarrassment and shyness becoming increasingly obvious.

"Lower your head, raise your hand."

She packed the cloth bag, put it around his neck, and then pulled his hand out. It was the first time they'd done this, yet it felt as natural as an old married couple. Fan Qingbo recalled his mother tying his father's tie and handing him his briefcase in his past life, and a warm smile unconsciously appeared on his lips. Suddenly, he felt the surroundings quiet down. He wanted to ask the scholar why he had stopped speaking, but when he looked up, he saw his lips pressing down on his.

She was somewhat taken aback, then realized his lips were merely pressed against hers, trembling slightly, excited, yet unable to penetrate. A smile flickered in her eyes, and she casually wrapped her arms around his neck, taking his lower lip into her mouth and gently biting it, then boldly probing her tongue into his mouth, igniting his passion…

After the kiss, both were slightly out of breath, and Fan Qingbo's clothes were wide open. The scholar blushed instantly at the sight, putting his hands behind his back like a child trying to cover something up after doing something wrong. This aroused Fan Qingbo's teasing spirit. "Hey, my lord, if I'm considered improper and unfaithful to my wife for just saying a few words, then what about your actions—both verbal and physical—doesn't that count as improper and unfaithful to your husband?"

Seeing him choke, Fan Qingbo laughed heartily. Remembering something, she asked, "This isn't your first time, so why is your kissing skill so bad?" The scholar's dullness, coupled with the fact that she had initiated the kisses the previous times, made her think he was a magician. However, although his performance last night wasn't exactly masterful, it was clear that he wasn't a complete novice.

"You..." The scholar's eyes widened, his face turned even redder, he opened his mouth but couldn't say a word, so he simply turned his head away to refuse to answer.

Fan Qingbo didn't miss the fleeting look of annoyance on his face and made a bold assumption: "You've never kissed anyone before?"

The scholar froze, his eyes fixed intently on the wall, as if trying to see a flower bloom in it, while his fingers began to frantically dig at the wall.

Fan Qingbo continued cautiously, seeking confirmation: "Could it be... that your first time wasn't voluntary?"

The words had barely left his mouth when, with a thud, the scholar bumped his head against the wall. He turned around in a panic, only to see Fan Qingbo's face contorted with rage, her skin turning slightly blue. She gritted her teeth and asked, "Which bastard dared to force himself on my man! Tell me, was it a man or a woman?"

He felt somewhat relieved upon hearing the first sentence, but his face turned pale upon hearing the second.

The story begins the year the scholar passed the imperial examination with top honors.

From a humble farmer in the morning to a high-ranking official in the capital, he achieved his ultimate goal as a scholar that year. However, at a banquet hosted by the Emperor, he encountered a beautiful ghost from Guigu Valley. Disguised as a courtesan, she attempted to assassinate him, but he severed her tendons, crippling her martial arts. This wouldn't have been so bad, but during the fight, he accidentally scratched her face with his silver pen and committed suicide. Entangled in a murder case, he was forced to leave the capital.

Upon returning to the martial world, he discovered that everyone believed the seductive ghost had tried to force herself on him, only to be instantly defeated. As for the reason why the seductive ghost forced herself on him... a strange rumor spread throughout the martial world: the Silver Scholar possessed extraordinary abilities, and women who cultivated with him could maintain their youth and greatly increase their power.

Then came a barrage of women offering themselves to him, some resorting to underhanded tactics when their advances failed. Fortunately, he had the Grand Elder, Bai Wufan, train him to have an indestructible body, thus preserving his chastity. From then on, he gained a reputation for being abstinent from women.

However, even the best can stumble. When he was twenty, while chasing a womanizer to the Miao region, he was unfortunately poisoned by a love potion and forced to consummate his marriage with a Miao woman. After the encounter, the Miao woman discovered that her powers hadn't increased, cursed the Central Plains people for being a traitor, threw down the antidote, and left...

"During your lovemaking, did she not kiss you?" Fan Qingbo was still agonizing over this, her face showing a concern she herself was unaware of.

The scholar's face flushed red and then paled, and now he was completely expressionless. "The women in Miao territory are bold, but they have an unwritten custom: they can have sex with any man, but they can only kiss the man they love."

Fan Qingbo nodded with barely satisfied expression, then remembered something else, "Why didn't you yell that you wanted to take responsibility for her?" She was just applying some medicine to him, and he had already driven her to the brink of despair. That Miao girl had already slept with him, so why didn't he react?

The scholar's eyes flickered, he lowered his head, and stammered, "She said I don't have to take responsibility."

Fan Qingbo raised an eyebrow. "I remember I also said I didn't need to take responsibility." Why? Did he think she was easy to bully because she was weak and didn't have any poison?

“That’s different.” The scholar suddenly looked up and stared straight at her. When the Miao girl said he didn’t need to take responsibility, he felt a sense of relief despite his guilt. But when she said he didn’t need to take responsibility, he felt a suffocating pressure in his heart, as if something was weighing on him. He hadn’t known why before, only using the excuse of propriety to insist on taking responsibility. Now he understood that it was simply because he had her in his heart.

Looking into his suddenly deep and intense gaze, Fan Qingbo's face inexplicably flushed. His heart skipped a beat, and he vaguely sensed that something was different. Not daring to delve deeper, he subconsciously chuckled twice and said, "If you say it's different, then it's different."

Then, awkwardly turning his head away, he stood up as if busy, looked around, and made sure he hadn't left anything behind.

After a while, when she turned back, he looked perfectly normal, resting his chin on his hand and waiting for her. Seeing her turn around, he gave her a completely innocent smile. She couldn't help but breathe a sigh of relief. She must have just been imagining things, right? Tsk tsk, would having sex with him really make her age last forever and increase her power? Shouldn't she just catch his dazedness?

She finally smiled and regained her cheerful demeanor. "Hey, silly, let's go down the mountain."