Agent secret Wind Boy

Chapitre 82

"I never imagined that in your eyes, I, your older brother, am not as important as a window?" Zongwang sighed, gazing intently at me. "No matter what I say, you ignore me. You only react when the window is closed. Sometimes, I really wish I could be a window in your room."

Nonsense! What does this have to do with the window? I'm worried about Huaiyuan being locked out and unable to come home, okay? Who knows what he's thinking?! I let out a big yawn—I wonder when he'll finally leave? Huaiyuan will be back soon, sigh! I'm so conflicted.

“If you don’t want to talk, I won’t force you. The weather is so nice today, shall I take you for a walk?” Zongwang suggested eagerly—a walk? Huaiyuan used to say this to me every evening after dinner, and then the two of us would stroll on the grassland, looking at the stars. Huaiyuan is clumsy; he can never distinguish between Gemini, Leo, Aquarius… these constellations. But he would listen to me very attentively, smile gently at me, and happily walk with me…

A gentle breeze caressed my face, the night as still as water. Tiny green lights flickered in the grass—ah, fireflies. When Huaiyuan and I were on the ranch, we would often catch many and put them inside our tent, blow out the oil lamp, and let those beautiful little creatures dance like stars across the sky.

"You like them?" Zongwang noticed me staring at them and asked softly, "Would you like me to catch some to take back to your room?"

I remained silent and gently shook my head—it wasn't Huaiyuan who caught it, I don't want it.

In the distance, I could faintly hear singing, and the campfire crackled and popped, casting beautiful light and shadow. I looked up at the sky, where countless stars seemed to be watching me. A shooting star streaked across the horizon with a dazzling tail, and I suddenly realized—summer had arrived again!

I stopped in my tracks, then froze completely—it suddenly felt like something was gently moving inside my stomach—there really was a little life inside! A love child that resembled both me and Huaiyuan?!

"Huaiyuan, some people say that every star in the sky represents a love story." My naiveté.

"Really? Then it must be ours, the brightest one." Huaiyuan's deep affection.

Tears slowly slid down her face. In that instant, all her senses suddenly awakened—Huaiyuan, do you know? The brightest stars in the sky are always shooting stars—brilliant, yet fleeting, like fireworks, blooming and then fading into silence. Was it destined, in the darkness, that you were destined to become a shooting star in my life?

"Qingyang, you cried?" Zongwang stared at my tears in disbelief, overjoyed.

"Brother, I had a dream. It was so painful, so bitter, so long." I looked at the leaping campfire in front of me and burst into tears. Just a few months ago, Huaiyuan and I smiled at each other across the firelight. Now the grassland is still there, the stars are still there, the campfire is still there, but he and I are now separated by death!

"It's been more than four months, and you've finally woken up." Zongwang smiled through his tears: "I thought you would never wake up again."

Yes, it's been over four months. The war is long over. If Huaiyuan were still alive, he should have come to find me long ago. The fact that he didn't come only means that he didn't keep his promise to come back alive—he broke his word.

Huaiyuan is gone. He'll never again jump in through the window to surprise me; he'll never again catch fireflies to fill the room and make me smile; he'll never again lie with me on the grass watching the stars and move me… Accepting this fact is incredibly painful, a chill creeps up my spine to my head, all my senses become acutely acute, the pain so intense it's suffocating—this is the price of waking from a dream. It hurts so much, yet I can't escape the pain with death, because I have Huaiyuan's child!

Thinking of my child, I suddenly felt a surge of energy—yes, even without Huaiyuan, I still have my child. Perhaps, with him/her by my side, the rest of my life won't be unbearably lonely…?! For my child's sake, maybe I can try to live a stronger, happier life?! My child, I'm sorry, because of your father, I almost forgot about you, and even refused to acknowledge your existence for a time. I'm sorry, from now on, I will wholeheartedly take good care of you and love you! Please accept my apology, accept this belated love from me.

With a loud bang, the door was slammed open. I frowned, quickly put on an outer robe, and turned around. Sure enough, it was Zong Wang. He was drunk, his eyes red, leaning against the door frame, staring intently at me.

"Brother, please knock before you come in." I sighed, gently reminding him—ever since waking from that dream, I insisted on moving out of Zongwang's mansion and finding another place to live in the city—he has a family, three lively and adorable children, and I don't want to be the culprit who destroys someone else's family harmony. I understand the heart-wrenching pain a woman feels when she loses her loved one, so I don't want anyone else to suffer like me—besides, I don't love that man at all!

I originally wanted to go straight back to Jiangning, but Zongwang said that the current situation was too chaotic, and I was more than five months pregnant. Traveling all that way alone, crossing the border between the Song and Jin dynasties, would be too dangerous. He suggested that I wait until after the baby was born to make further plans. Since I had moved out, I didn't want to have any more involvement with him. I couldn't rely on him for my future life, could I? Zongwang became a little impatient after being turned away by me several times.

"Qingyang, why won't you accept me? What do I lack compared to Jiang Mohui?" Zongwang whispered painfully.

"You can go now, your sister-in-law is probably looking for you." I reminded him of his responsibilities in a cold voice.

"Qingyang, don't you know how much I like you? Why are you being so cruel to me?" Zongwang's dark eyes had become deep as he looked at me.

I followed his gaze and looked down—damn it! The room was filled with steam and the scent of a post-bath fragrance. My clothes were half-open, my black hair was still damp, and water droplets dripped down my hair onto my neck, which was slightly pink from the heat, and then trickled into my breasts, which had become fuller and rounder due to pregnancy…

"Please leave first." I pulled my collar tighter, trying to appear calm as I shooed him away.

"Qingyang..." Zongwang murmured as he leaned closer. I backed away, my back already against the door. He lowered his head and kissed my lips. I turned my head away, struggling and hitting him hard, but my actions seemed to only arouse him more. He locked the door behind him, twisted my hands, and carried me to the bed.

"No!" I cried out in fear, trying my best to dodge, but I was no match for the drunken man's brute force.

"Qingyang, don't be afraid, let me love you!" Zongwang shouted frantically, his strong body pressing heavily against mine. With just one hand, he easily pinned my hands behind my head, while his other hand began to grope my body, tearing off my clothes—Huaiyuan had always shown me a gentle side, leading me to mistakenly believe that all men in ancient times were gentlemen! I was terrified; I had no idea that a man's strength could be so terrifying! Tears streamed down my face, and I was utterly ashen-faced.

"Huaiyuan, where are you? Help me!" I struggled frantically, crying out in despair—Zongwang's burning lips were already on my neck, pressed against my collarbone—a sharp pain shot through my abdomen, my child, my child! Zongwang, why did you so cruelly take away even my last bit of happiness, my last glimmer of hope?! I hate you, I hate you!!

I was desperate. I stopped struggling and stared at him blankly in a cold voice: "Brother, do you want me to hate you for the rest of my life? If so, then continue!"

"Qingyang..." Zongwang regained his senses for a moment, and he looked up at me with his bloodshot eyes: "Don't worry, I will marry you, and I will take good care of you for the rest of my life!"

"Fine, let me do it myself. I don't like being forced." I looked at him coldly, reached under the pillow, and gritted my teeth to tightly grip the Heartless Token.

Zongwang nodded and stepped back. I raised my hand, and the Heartless Decree flashed with a cold light as it plunged into his chest. He cried out in pain, clutching his wound, and blood oozed wildly from between his fingers, quickly staining the sheets red. He stared at me blankly—as if he didn't understand what had happened.

I staggered to my feet. I felt a warm current trickling down between my legs, quickly soaking my white dress and leaving a crimson mark—gazing at the ever-increasing blood, I smiled bitterly—my child, I'm so sorry, I'm useless, I couldn't protect you! Because of my resistance to you in the first few months, I hurt your heart, so you chose to leave this useless, bad mother of yours?!

I know that Huaiyuan left me for this reason—because my love wasn't deep enough, intense enough, or strong enough to give him the strength to overcome all difficulties, so he chose to leave.

"Qingyang..." Amid Zongwang's desperate cry, I smiled faintly and calmly raised the Heartless Decree. Its cold, icy light strangely excited me—Huaiyuan, our family will soon be reunited...

——-----------------------------------------------------------------------------

[Volume 4, Finale: Chapter 26, The Small Boat Vanishes]

"Qingyang, I'm sorry..." Zongwang's dark eyes, gradually dimming, were filled with pain and guilt. I smiled faintly and calmly raised the Heartless Decree. Its cold light strangely excited me—Huaiyuan, our family will soon be reunited...

Through my blurry, tear-filled eyes, I seemed to see a tall, slender figure gracefully vaulting over the windowpane. His handsome face wore a familiar, gentle smile, and his warm, large hands held me tightly. A faint, refreshing scent filled my nostrils…

"Qing'er...!" A deep, trembling voice, as intoxicating as fine wine, reached my ears. I smiled in a daze—so this is what death tastes like. It allows me to see my beloved; to smell the long-lost comforting scent; and even to feel the warmth of an embrace as it always has...

"Huaiyuan, I was so foolish. If I had known it would be so easy to reunite, why did I suffer for so long? I should have ended this torment sooner. Thankfully, thankfully I realized it's not too late now." I murmured softly, gazing into his dark, star-like eyes through my tears, and smiled as I faded into the darkness...

"Qing'er, you silly girl, why are you so silly?!" Huaiyuan's voice, filled with pain, rang in my ears in a blur. I felt so light, my eyelids so heavy—but I wasn't silly at all. Look, I can hear you now! I never knew that even your voice could bring me such happiness. I was enveloped by this immense happiness, intoxicated by it, and never wanted to wake up…

"Hurry up, if the Jin soldiers find us and catch up, we won't be able to escape." I frowned—this guy is a bit silly. This is Zongwang's Eastern Court, his territory. The whole world is full of Jin soldiers, everyone knows me, and no one will bother me. I don't know what he's yelling about, making it impossible for me to hear Huaiyuan's voice!

So this is what the road to heaven is like—so rugged and shaky, like riding a roller coaster, making me so dizzy. I'm so confused. Why am I feeling hot and cold at different times? Why does Huaiyuan's voice seem near and far at different times?

But there's one thing I'm very satisfied with—I'm constantly surrounded by a warm, familiar aura, every pore breathing in the fresh air, that warmth penetrating my skin and reaching my heart, making me feel completely comfortable. If this is paradise, then I'd be willing to stay here forever.

"Qing'er, wake up." Why did Huaiyuan's voice sound so melancholy? I was so confused. We were together, so why did he sound unhappy? —Yes, why didn't the baby come? It must have given birth to me and doesn't want me anymore. Huaiyuan must be blaming me for losing the baby. He's angry with me, angry that I didn't protect our baby. I felt so guilty and heartbroken, tears streaming down my face, one after another, seemingly unstoppable.

"Qing'er, are you in a lot of pain? Don't cry, I'm here." Someone gently wiped away my tears and softly comforted me. A playful butterfly flew across my forehead, then landed on my face, brushing against my lips, so gently, as soft as a spring breeze.

"Qing'er, open your eyes and look at me! It's me, I'm back." Huaiyuan seemed to have caught a cold; his voice was thick with a nasal tone—so even in heaven, there are colds! If this is a dream, it must be an unprecedentedly beautiful one. Every day, every hour, every moment, I can hear Huaiyuan's voice. No, why should I open my eyes? If I open them, everything will disappear. This is good enough! —My eyelids are heavy, but my mind is relaxed; my body aches, but I feel comfortable; my mouth tastes bitter, but my heart is sweet.

Something kept rubbing against my face. It was soft, warm, a little sticky, fragrant, and smooth. It kept bothering me, making my nose itch. I forced my eyes open—and met a pair of big, dark, bright eyes. Those eyes were on a chubby, pink, round face. Its cute, chubby little hands were resting on my forehead, and its bright red lips were dripping with saliva, happily nibbling at my nose like it was food.