Je suis née beauté, et je suis suprême - Chapitre 169
Looking at them, I suddenly realized that everyone had grown up; they were no longer children but teenagers. They talked about how Zi Yi had become more reserved and evasive with friends, and how they chose to leave a deep impression on Shen Zi Yi during their youth.
“He did it on purpose,” I said. I hope they come to their senses. Although I haven’t investigated him thoroughly, I don’t think he’s someone you can wholeheartedly associate with.
No one echoed her; Zi Mo had grown accustomed to Zi Yi's willful behavior. Wu Hui blindly believed that Zi Yi was the weakest and most pitiful. Su Gu simply blamed herself, silently taking the responsibility upon herself.
Qianqing saw the problem; he was very thoughtful. I don't care. If I really like it, keeping it in my own home wouldn't be difficult, especially since they are all powerful nobles; what's so difficult about that?
"Lord Sikong, shouldn't I do something?"
Why bother?
“They will be my subjects in the future.”
"Don't you trust your own judgment?" Besides their impressive family backgrounds, they were chosen because of shared aspirations, and they won't give up easily.
"I do not wish to leave behind only sighs."
"Should we let them go back to the way they were before..." like they were before—only arrogance remained. "However..."
"What?"
"It would be better to find someone else; I think he's weird."
"No, I think it's fine."
Will it work? I don't know, maybe it really will.
Ziyi went out after recovering from his illness, and Qianqing and I went too. Watching him can help relieve stress when we have something to do. He's like a stage actor, good for passing the time.
He sat on the ground, and Su Gu and Wu Hui tried to coax him, but he wouldn't move. I watched him whining through the car window; he was indeed quite amusing, his ignorance was amusing, but what a pity—what a pity for that stunningly beautiful face.
The first time I heard him sing, his tone was strange, but it was very pleasant to listen to: it reminded me of the past, of those unpleasant things, of my brother, and of myself when I was little.
I returned home and went to visit my mother in the deep courtyard.
My mother was very happy to see me, but my father remained silent. He didn't want me to become the Prime Minister of Dongqing, and he didn't want me to get involved in the conflicts, but he was helpless.
Wu looked at me; he had grown up, and in his eyes, I vaguely saw myself in ordinary life. He was about the same age as Ziyi, but he wasn't as arrogant and unreasonable as Ziyi.
I slept beside my mother, nestled in her arms like when I was a child. She patted me and lulled me to sleep. I was always in a deep sleep. When my companions got hungry, I got up and let them out to roam. Sitting in front of the mirror, looking at this face that didn't belong to me, I inexplicably took off the mask...
I stared at myself in the mirror for a long time… This is me, such a wretched person… I looked and gazed, thinking of my life in the forbidden area, of my boneless brother, of the endless mountains behind the mountain…
-- "Humble..."
My instinct told me to turn back, and I made the fatal mistake of my life.
"Ah!--" Mother screamed. I suddenly came to my senses and was about to step forward to stop her when a ray of light swiftly pierced through her artery.
My mind went completely blank.
Grandpa appeared in the room... He helped me put on my mask, took my hand, and led me outside.
The father came running, panting, and froze when he saw the mother lying on the ground.
She wanted to cry, but her father covered her mouth.
I dared not think of anything, dared not recall what had just happened. I just followed Grandpa.
Grandpa took me back to my room, and neither of us said a word.
I can't blame him; he's my grandfather. His eyes told me: no one has the right to hurt me.
I asked myself: Does it hurt? A little, I guess. She is my mother, the mother I admire. She has always been so gentle. When I left, she hugged my father and cried. When I came back, she watched over me all night. When I was little, she would feed me soup.
I was wrong. I should be the one who deserves to die for what I did tonight.
secluded mansion --
Sikong Shi ran towards his beloved wife, and Sikong Wu burst into tears: "Mother! Mother!..."
She slowly opened her eyes, laboriously raising her hand to glance at Sikong Wu, then turning to her husband. For so many years, Shi had lived in seclusion for her, and she was deeply grateful. When she gave birth to Qian, she was already the happiest woman. She asked for nothing in return: "Shi... I'm sorry to Qian..."
"Don't say..." He understood, he understood better than anyone else. He had also been highly regarded by his father, and he knew how much suffering was involved.
"In the next life... let me... wait for you..." Her hand slipped, and she left with no other requests.
She didn't have time to tell Qian that she had already prepared the winter clothes and put them in his wardrobe.
"Mother!—Mother!—"
...
Mother is gone, just like that.
I walked into the back mountain and sat in the old spot where Grandpa used to pick me up. The mountain was full of snakes and insects, all watching me cry. I didn't know why they were crying. -- Listening to their mournful cries, my heart ached. I hated myself, hated my despicable intentions. I wanted to prove something, but in the end, it was she who got hurt.
...
I'm even less willing to speak in the court, and it's the same with them. I want peace and quiet. I want to leave everything behind and live a quiet life in the back mountains.
"Chouqian!" he called me, so energetic and outspoken. Yes, he was right, his words encompassing my unspeakable flaws.
He lunged at me and hugged me. I didn't flinch; I didn't have the strength to flinch. "What's wrong? Are you so happy about the position of Prime Minister that you've gone mad?"
He laughed heartily, laughing without restraint.
"No." The position of Prime Minister was chosen by the Sikong family and has nothing to do with me.