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Chapitre 14

My mood soured, and I got up and left without even touching my chopsticks.

Let's go check out the downtown area.

The sight of vulgar signs and men in fancy clothes greeting customers was unpleasant.

The colors are chosen haphazardly. The irregular shapes lack any sense of aesthetic unity. How could they make it such a mess? Each shop arrogantly claims to be better than the others. There's a complete lack of harmony. Not only is the appearance inferior, but the spirit is also low. And the signboards are the concrete manifestation of this. Therefore, it would be better if these bustling areas made up of signboards simply disappeared from the world.

It's not that I'm against capitalism or a free-market society, but this lack of character under commercialism is perplexing. If we don't quickly build a unified and standardized landscape, people will likely become increasingly ignorant.

A slovenly dressed street prostitute beckoned with a lewd voice. Her heavy makeup was smudged in one corner, making her look extremely ugly. Seeing the man's obvious disgust, she added superfluous phrases like, "Oh, young man, are you in a bad mood?" He spat at her, told her to get lost, and cursed her as "idiot, madwoman," before walking away.

(omitted)

Are all women in this world as foolish as that prostitute from before?

There is a lack of consistency in thinking. The mind is filled with emptiness.

The gaps were filled with vulgar, ridiculous, and foolish ideas.

So no matter what you say to them, they won't understand.

All women are the same. They are born with defects.

Talking on the surface is fine. But once you get to know them a little better, their lack of rationality and logic will surface, and the relationship will crumble instantly.

I've heard that women think through their uterus. As a man, I don't understand the impact this organ has on their mental state. If this organ were removed, would women become more rational and logical?

So what about the girl with the box?

Every woman I'd ever known hated that perfect boxy bedding. Even though no other bedding could surpass it.

So what about the girl with the box?

We absolutely have to find it.

We need that girl.

(The following is omitted)

That's right, I see.

Kusumoto Yoriko gradually came to this view.

Since that night, the parts that had felt off have gradually started to make sense.

Ever since Kanako became like that, Raiko has been living a life that is almost like seclusion.

I wasn't imprisoned or placed under house arrest; I just didn't want to go out, so the outcome was the same. Behind a paper door, my disgusting mother sat slumped in the living room 24/7. Just thinking about her there sent chills down my spine, let alone the fact that if I tried to leave my room, I'd definitely run into her.

Lai Zi pondered.

If Kanako were to die like this...

Died? Kanako will die?

Unimaginable.

Kanako was her reincarnation, yet she ended up with such a tragic fate. No, it shouldn't be like this.

Wouldn't that be the same as suicide?

Suicide? No, that's not it.

By the way, she might not be dead. Kanako might still be alive.

Still alive? If he's still alive...

No, this won't end well either.

Lai Zi's thoughts were caught in a contradiction.

Unhappiness and happiness, the strong and the weak, positive and negative—shouldn't these opposing elements be balanced through this life and the next, or past and present lives? Those who are unhappy in this life should be happy in the next. Therefore, Lai Zi, who is definitely not happy now, should be happy in the next life—that is, in Kanako's life. Why?

Why did you cry?

I can't understand it.

What does that pimple represent?

That's the fifth sign of decay, the fifth sign of decay has arrived. So, so Kanako has to die?

so……

By the way, perhaps Kanako has already given up on life and become a celestial being?

In my hazy memory, Chinese legends say that after death, people can be reincarnated as immortals. I think they're called something like "corpse-dissolving immortals."

Decline is the natural order of things, but Kanako hated it... So for this tiny reason, Kanako broke free from the cycle of reincarnation and ascended to heaven...

That might be a good explanation.

No, no, this won't do. Because if I do this, then Kanako's next life won't be her anymore... Kusumoto Yoriko?

No, that's not right. It shouldn't be like that.

I've figured out a good explanation.

A very good explanation.

However, if Kanako were to continue living as a human being—it still wouldn't end well.

None of these are right, this won't do. What has happened to Kanako?

Lai Zi was restless, tossing and turning in his unsolvable thoughts.

My mind was in a mess; the most important thing was to confirm Kanako's life or death.

Let's think about it after we've confirmed it.

Her limbs were twisted, and she had lost a lot of blood, resembling a broken doll.

What happened to Kanako after that? I feel so uneasy. So worried. So scary.

That night...

Shortly after Kanako's beautiful older sister, Yoko, appeared, Raiko's mother also rushed to the hospital. The mother wore a soiled shirt and a dusty skirt, her hair was disheveled, and she was wearing dirty sandals. As usual, she wasn't wearing makeup and looked extremely unattractive. The difference between her and Yoko, who had also rushed to the scene in a similar panic, was striking.

The mother, looking disheveled, ran down the corridor to Lai Zi, her shoulders shaking and gasping for breath, and said in a sharp, piercing deaf voice:

"Little Lai! What mischief have you gotten yourself into now!"

Lai Zi thought her mother was foolish and didn't want to reply. She just stared at Yang Zi without turning her head. Yang Zi seemed a little surprised. After a pause, her mother called out again:

"Lai Zi!"

At the same time, he raised his hand, probably to slap Lai Zi. Go ahead and hit him. But that raised hand was grabbed by the burly detective… I think his name was Kiba… a strong arm.

How enjoyable.

"Are you this girl's mother?"

"And who are you? Let go of me!"

"I'm a criminal investigator. You've only just arrived, and the first thing you do is try to hit someone. What are you thinking? Can't you listen to your daughter's side of the story first? Anyway, put your hand down. It's very embarrassing in public!"

It looks terrible—that's what the detective said too, just as Lai Zi had thought.

The mother's appearance and behavior were truly appalling, yet the lewd men surrounding her were completely oblivious, seduced by her tasteless allure. Lai Zi had never considered relying on men, but the tough detective who reprimanded her mother seemed a little different.

—This is probably what it feels like if you have a father.

Lai Zi acted as if it were none of his business.

"Let me go. What a mother does to her child is none of our business! This child, this child..."

"Does someone who can't be contacted even when going out late at night deserve to be called a mother? Do you have the right to scold your child who goes out at night?"

"That's what the detective said."

The mother remained silent and lowered her hand.

“I have absolutely no interest in meddling in other people’s family affairs, but since you are the mother, you should listen to what the child has to say first. If the child does something wrong, you should reflect on your own inadequate supervision before scolding the child. This child’s important friend was seriously injured right in front of her, and she is currently in a state of confusion. Don’t you even understand such a small thing?”

My mother looked like she was about to cry, which she deserved. But when she frowned, her already ugly face looked even more filthy. The thought of my mother, so ugly, being exposed to everyone made me feel extremely ashamed. I wished my mother hadn't come to greet me.

Lai Zi thought.

Behind a pillar far behind her mother, she saw Sasakawa's figure. What an annoying man, following her even to a place like this.

"Anyway, your daughter is the only witness. The police will be coming to question you tomorrow, so don't wander off until then. Also, please tell me your name."

"Kusumoto Kimie."

The mother answered.

Lai Zi was so ashamed that his face looked like it was about to burst into flames.

Before Kanako's surgery was even over, Raiko was forcibly taken home by her mother. Although Kanako's safety was a great concern, for some reason Raiko didn't want to resist and obediently went back with her mother. As expected, Sasagawa was already waiting in the dark corridor. After saying a few words to her mother, he looked Raiko up and down with a pitying, emotionless, and nauseating gaze.

The three of them squeezed together and got into Sasakawa's truck to go home. Their sweaty skin was in close contact with each other, and the sticky, wet feeling and sour smell made Raiko want to vomit countless times.

Thinking about adding vegetables.

What exactly happened to Jia Cai Zi?

I arrived home at around 5:30 in the morning.

After Sasakawa escorted Yoriko and the others home, he left without a word. After Sasakawa left, the distance between the mother and Yoriko widened further, as if all communication between them had ceased. The mother silently laid out her sleeping mat.

Unable to fall asleep.

The police arrived before noon the next day.

I didn't want to think about anything at all, so I didn't say anything.

The mother, who had been unusually humble the day before, was bowing and scraping, which only fueled my anger. While apologizing for Lai Zi's silence, she turned around and scolded him.

They said things like, "This child isn't a delinquent; she just grew up without a father. I'm so sorry, please forgive her!"

What does this have to do with not having a father? Besides, isn't a father your own mother...? Is this your responsibility? If you're going to apologize, you should apologize to me... Lai Zi thought about these things resentfully, but in the end, she decided to remain silent.

Even speaking up has become a hassle.

The patrolman who came wasn't the same one from yesterday. The earnest yet foolish officer seemed to be having a headache; continuing the stalemate would only make him look pathetic, so Lai Zi started crying. Seeing Lai Zi crying, the police officer said:

"Ah. You must have suffered a great blow. How pitiful." He nodded and said to his mother:

"Madam, please don't blame our daughter too much. It's understandable that she can't figure it out. It seems that the higher-ups also believe it was suicide. Just wait until she comes up with something and then report it to the nearby police station."