I was just about to go home when Sun Sixin came to work. I asked him a few questions about Huang Mao, and Sun Sixin said, "Their boss is called 'Gaozhi,' he's the local tyrant. The shops next to the bar have to pay him every month. We don't need to be afraid of him, he can't afford to mess with Manager Liu. These people are the ones you can't just bribe; they're like mangy dogs. If you give them money today, they'll be even more aggressive tomorrow. You can only find someone even tougher than them to deal with."
I told him, "Your manager Liu has already resigned."
Sun Sixin simply said "Oh," as if he had expected it. He smiled at me and said, "Gaijue isn't very popular. He can only invite a maximum of 20 people. Qiang, as long as you get everyone together that day, he'll shut up."
This young man was capable with a touch of cunning, yet not unpleasant. He hadn't explicitly stated my identity, but it seemed he had already guessed most of it.
Seeing that the bruises on my face were almost completely covered up and no longer visible, I got up to say goodbye. I specifically told them to wait until I arrived to deal with the evening's matters, but Zhang Qing said, "Go watch your TV series, you don't need to do this."
So I decided: I won't watch TV dramas, I'll come earlier.
When I got home, Baozi was already cooking. As soon as I went upstairs, I quickly took off my shirt and held it in my hand—it was dirty and torn. Before I could even change, I suddenly heard Li Shishi behind me exclaim in surprise, "Hey, cousin, what's that lipstick mark on your back?"
Baozi immediately grabbed a spatula and rushed out, yelling, "You bastard, were you doing this behind my back...?" She glanced at my back and suddenly burst into laughter. I was very puzzled, straining my shoulders to look back, but couldn't find anything. Finally, I looked in the mirror with my back to her, and realized it wasn't a lip print at all, but the round opening from the cupping jar An Daoquan had used to give me the cupping treatment. Because the fish tank had a spiral pattern, it looked like a big lip.
I put on some clothes and said dejectedly, "Cousin, you're really getting me into trouble—don't you use your brain? Who has such a big mouth? Do you think I went on a date with Julia Roberts?" Li Shishi blushed.
"And you..." I turned around and pointed at Baozi, only to find her calmly going to cook. I turned back to continue scolding Li Shishi, only to find that she had run away too.
While we were eating, I noticed Baozi wiping her hands and catching her breath before starting to eat, so I knew she was tired. She stands for about six hours every day and then has to cook for seven people, so it's a lot of physical activity. I told her, "Baozi, stop working after this month."
While drinking water, Baozi said, "Yes, you'll take care of me."
"Okay, but you need to maintain your figure and stop watching those fighting dramas all the time."
Baozi wasn't listening to what I was saying at all. She asked me, "What have you been busy with lately? You're never home."
"...helping a friend with school matters."
"By the way, I heard from Teacher Zhang that the students there don't have to pay a single penny. So how does your friend make money? I've never heard you mention such a friend before."
I stammered, "Their whole family immigrated to the Netherlands, and then they felt it was unfair to just leave like that. They were too embarrassed to return to their roots, so they donated some money to support education..."
"Then why does he insist on setting one up himself? Why not just donate the money to build a few school buildings for a primary school? Are you talking about the Netherlands or Henan?" Baozi isn't stupid.
Qin Shi Huang finally couldn't help but say, "How can we not make money? Let's use the first batch of students to build up our reputation, then we won't have to worry about attracting students who want to pay in the future."
It seems that even if Qin Shi Huang was kind-hearted, he was still a politician with treacherous intentions and a long-term vision. The Qin army was invincible in its time, firstly because the Qin people were fierce, and secondly, mainly because Qin Shi Huang's military rewards were extremely generous. The Qin army had 20 ranks of merit, and the conditions for joining were very lenient; anyone could "sign a contract," and titles were awarded based on the number of kills. Reaching the second or third rank was enough to ensure a comfortable life, and becoming a "Platinum Warrior" was not far from being granted a fiefdom of ten thousand households. Therefore, neither the battle-hardened Wei heavy infantry nor the Zhao iron cavalry could compare to the "war-loving" Qin armor.
But you know what, what he said makes sense. Once we get rid of the 300 and the Liangshan heroes, my Yucai Martial Arts School might actually be able to get on track. With the two classic battles of subduing the scoundrel and fighting Tiger Brother, the school has already gained some fame even before it's officially opened.
Li Shishi tapped the table lightly with her chopsticks and said, "Cousin, I also want to find something to do."
I said, "Didn't we agree that you would become a teacher after the school reopened?"
"Besides this, I also want to do something else, like making movies."
"Huh?" I was surprised that she would have such an idea.
Baozi swallowed a mouthful of vegetables and said, "I support you, Xiaonan! With your looks and charisma, you're definitely going to be famous!"
I glanced at Li Shishi and said, "Then I have two pieces of advice for you: First, don't take any roles with Wong Kar-wai. He takes at least several years to make one of his films, and he might come after you if you break the contract. Second, whatever you do, don't get 'sexually harassed'..."
Chapter Seventy-One Five-Star Gin
It was still light when we finished eating. Xiang Yu put down his chopsticks, picked me up, and took me downstairs. He put me by the door of the van and said, "You have to teach me how to drive today, no matter what."
I reluctantly got into the car. Xiang Yu sat next to me, watching me operate the controls, muttering to himself as he followed my movements: "Start the engine, pull the handbrake, depress the clutch, shift gears..."
I drove to the elementary school gate. The students had already left, the gate was locked, and the old gatekeeper was drinking tea in the guardhouse. I called out, "Grandpa, can you open the gate so we can practice driving for a bit?" The old man didn't even look at us, just shook his head and continued sipping his water.
Xiang Yu angrily said, "I'll go kick the door open."
I quickly stopped him and said, "Do you still want to come back?" Only then did he give up.
I reached into a cardboard box in the car and pulled out two packs of Zhonghua cigarettes, then went into the guardhouse and placed them in front of the old man. I thought an old gatekeeper would be incredibly excited to see such bright red Zhonghua cigarettes, but to my surprise, he was very calm. He slowly unpacked the cigarettes, chatted with me for a bit, lit one, took a puff, and then stood up, picked up his keys, and opened the gate. Finally, as I was getting into my car, he patted me on the shoulder and said, "Young man, you're good. Come again anytime—these Zhonghua cigarettes are actually genuine!" Only then did I realize he had been assuming I was trying to fool him with two packs of fake cigarettes.
I drove the car to the playground, turned off the engine, and said to Xiang Yu, "You can do it. Don't you already know how to start a car?"
Xiang Yu moved to the driver's seat, stared blankly for a moment, and asked me, "What was the first step again?" I rested my head on the glass and said dejectedly, "Start the engine!"
"Oh..." He then went to turn the key. It's not really his fault; many people are like that. They can learn the theory fluently, but they become dumbfounded as soon as they get in the car. Besides, Xiang Yu was a person from more than 2,000 years ago.
He started the engine, looked down to find the clutch, stepped on it, and even knew how to shift gears. Then, when he accelerated, the car stalled…
"Brother Yu, can we release the handbrake first?"
"Oh..." He twisted the steering wheel, released the handbrake, pressed the clutch, then accelerated, and the car stalled...
"Release the clutch slowly, and then accelerate once the car starts moving."
"Oh..." Xiang Yu's forehead was sweating, and he started frantically fiddling with things again.
Half an hour later, the car was still there. Xiang Yu's performance in learning to drive was lackluster. I hadn't originally planned to teach him properly, but people are strange; when they encounter a clumsy apprentice, they feel compelled to teach him.
I shooed Xiang Yu into the passenger seat and asked him, "Can you ride a horse?"
Xiang Yu wiped his sweat and said, "This is much harder than riding a horse. I could ride a horse when I was four years old."
"Okay, now imagine you're riding a horse. Starting the engine is like putting on the saddle, which means you're going to ride it; releasing the handbrake is like untying the reins; pressing the clutch is like you're on the horse's back; shifting gears is like you're giving the horse a nudge; and then releasing the clutch and giving it gas is like you're whipping it—and that's how you start running, isn't it?"
Xiang Yu exclaimed in surprise, "I didn't expect you could ride a horse!"
"I've never even ridden a donkey before, isn't this what you forced me to do?"
The facts show that Xiang Yu was quite intelligent. A person who could become invincible after only a few days of learning martial arts must have had exceptional comprehension skills in addition to his natural talent—he cannot be equated with a simpleton.
Xiang Yu's movements this time were fluid and graceful, but what he muttered was: "Saddle the horse, untie the reins, mount the horse, nudge its belly, and give it another lash..."