“It’s Yu…” Li Shishi only managed to utter one word before instinctively covering her mouth tightly, her beautiful eyes filled with turmoil. I smiled at her and said to Xiang Yu, “Let’s go, you drive.”
Li Shishi hurriedly said, "I'll go too!"
I said, "What are you going there for? It's not like you're going to see Pan An (a legendary handsome man)."
Li Shishi smiled and said, "It seems that it's easier for girls to get close to other girls."
I thought it made a lot of sense, so I immediately said, "Let's do it together."
Li Shishi turned around with her hands behind her back, swaying gracefully, and said, "No one's inviting me, so I'd better not go."
I was dumbfounded: "You..." I could only force a smile and say, "Little aunt, stop joking, this is a matter of life and death."
Xiang Yu asked, bewildered, "What are you doing? Where are you going?"
"Enough talk, get in the car." I reckon the first person in history to dare to be as arrogant as Xiang Yu.
Li Shishi jumped into the car before me, and I sat in the passenger seat. Xiang Yu arrived late, got in, started the engine, pulled the handbrake, pressed the clutch, and shifted gears with practiced ease. He asked me, "Where to?"
Do you know University Road?
"Which road is opposite Heping Third Street?"
"……right."
"knew."
After the car had been driving for a while, I looked out the window and said, "Shouldn't we go straight to University Road?"
“I know a shortcut that’s not only close, but also has no traffic police.”
...That half-box of Zhonghua cigarettes wasn't a waste; it seems Old Wang shared all his expertise. Driving is an art, and many practical skills are more important than top-notch driving skills, including yelling at tricycles blocking the way and skillfully avoiding traffic police. Keep in mind, Old Wang used to drive a big truck! We should have no doubt that Xiang Yu could drive this car to any corner of the world now.
On the bus, I called Wang Jing, the most beautiful girl in our department. They had already arrived at the school. I asked her if Zhang Bing was in the same dormitory as her. She said they weren't in the same building at all. Zhang Bing lived in Building 7.
I said, "Xiaojing, could you do me a favor later? When I get there, could you call her and ask her to come out?"
Wang Jing asked warily, "What are you trying to do?"
I calmly said, "Do I look like a bad guy?"
"Yes, it looks like it. So what?"
"...So do you think I'm a bad person?"
"You can know a person's face but not their heart. What do you want from me?"
Are all Chinese literature majors so unpopular?
I said, "I want to introduce her to a boyfriend. You just need to ask her to come out in a bit. My friend and I will only take a quick look at her and won't bother you. Besides, it's on your school campus, what are you worried about?
Wang Jing chuckled and said, "That's hard to say. The rate of love-related murders among female art students is naturally high, especially on campus. Besides, would your friend dare to pursue the infamous 'Zhang Bancheng'?"
"What's the meaning?"
“There were so many people chasing after Zhang Bing, enough to fill half the city, so we called her ‘Zhang Half-City’.”
"Don't worry, my friend's favorite thing to do is massacre a city—so, are you going to help her or not? As long as you trick her out, you and your friend can have all your drinks for free at 'Reverse Time' from now on."
"Do I look like the kind of person who would betray a friend for personal gain? Besides, Uncle Zhu Gui already gave us all the benefits."
That fat bastard! I handed the phone to Li Shishi and whispered, "Get her sorted out!"
Li Shishi took the phone and said gently, "Little sister, you may not know the situation, but have you considered that your small act of kindness might fulfill a thousand-year-old wish? My brother is a real man; you can meet him first..."
All I heard on the phone was Wang Jing shouting, "You bring your whole family and friends with you when you're trying to pick up girls? I'm really scared of you guys. Fine, I'll help you out. But let me give you a friendly reminder: the two guys who are most enthusiastic about pursuing Zhang Bing right now are the basketball center from the sports college next door—tall and handsome; and our student council president—not a great guy, but a total womanizer. Neither of them has a chance. I really can't think of anyone Zhang Bing would like except for the all-around genius Huang Yaoshi."
Li Shishi smiled and asked, "Then what kind of girl do you like, little sister?"
Wang Jing hesitated shyly.
“She likes Li Bai—” I snatched the phone. Since I had already succeeded, why waste words? I told Wang Jing, “I’ll take action as soon as I call you in a bit.”
After hanging up the phone, I said to Li Shishi, "How do you know she's younger than you? You keep calling her 'little sister'?"
"You don't understand, do you? Women are only attracted to women older than themselves."
"Huh? Brother Yu, is that so?"
Xiang Yu glared at me, and I realized I had completely asked the wrong person. I then asked Li Shishi, "Why?"
"No matter how strong a woman may seem, deep down she longs to be pampered and spoiled, to be able to act coquettishly in someone's arms. But if someone acts coquettishly towards you, it means you're getting old. Calling her 'little sister' is a matter of etiquette."
I turned to her and said, "Cousin isn't afraid of getting old. I'll let you snuggle in my arms and act cute in a little while."
Li Shishi glanced at me and said, "They were talking about women."
She's already started acting cute.
Xiang Yu suddenly said, "We're almost there. Where are you going? We can't enter the school."
"Leave the car here, let's go inside."
Xiang Yu was very dissatisfied with my use of the word "throw". He carefully locked the car and gently pulled on the car door to check it before he felt at ease - if he pulled hard on the car door, he might break the lock.
University C is a first-class comprehensive university in the province with a full range of disciplines, but it is only a third-rate university nationwide. It is adjacent to the Teachers' College on the left and the Physical Education College on the right, so the road is called University Road, and the area within this radius is collectively known as University Town, a prosperous and vibrant place.
We entered the campus of C University. Passing the founding monument in the square in front of the school, we walked along the tree-lined path, where we could see statues of Confucius, Sima Qian, Zu Chongzhi, and Marco Polo standing in the grass. Li Shishi knew a little about Marco Polo from books, but her understanding of him became vague after Zhu Xi, and the figures of Kang Youwei, Li Dazhao, Lu Xun, and Zhan Tianyou completely baffled her. At each statue we passed, Li Shishi patiently read the biographical information, which caused us to waste a lot of time.