Jian Changnian once thought that after half a year of silence, she could bury her love for her in her heart and not disturb her. But seeing her standing here alive, with red eyes and trembling thin shoulders, she still couldn't help but want to offer her heart to her, even if it was crushed and thrown into the mud.
The young man had nothing of value but his sincere heart.
When someone pulled her into their arms, their embrace digging into her bones, Xie Shi'an did waver. She was in so much pain; it had been so long since anyone had given her a warm hug.
Countless nights she suffered from severe pain, fainting and waking up only to faint again, and she managed to get through them by calling out her name.
Xie Shi'an closed his eyes, raised his hand, and just as his fingertips touched the back of her clothes, the dressing room door was opened.
"Chang Nian, the competition is about to begin, Wan..."
The teammates were stunned by what they saw.
Xie Shi'an shoved her away as if she were a raging flood or a ferocious beast, leaving without even glancing at her.
"Jian Changnian, I made myself very clear that day. Don't make me hate you."
***
In the past, internal tests like these were easy for Xie Shi'an; she was usually the first to finish. But today, she dragged it out until the very end, playing three full games before finally securing the last World Championship spot by a mere two points.
While Wan Jing breathed a sigh of relief, he couldn't help but feel worried for her. There were many strong opponents at the World Championships, and it would probably be even more difficult.
While Lü Xiaoting was still cheering for Xie Shi'an, she turned her head and found that Jian Changnian had already started packing her things.
"What's wrong? Are you unhappy that Sister An is back?"
It's clear that everyone is happy that Xie Shi'an has returned to the team, but she, who should be the happiest person, can't feel happy at all.
Jian Changnian slung her golf bag over her shoulder, turned around, and left.
"No, I'm a little tired, I'll go back first."
Xie Shi'an turned his gaze away from her back and looked at the scoreboard in front of him.
The two had their positions reversed; Jian Changnian was now in first place, while she was at the bottom.
Xie Shi'an stared at her name for a long time, feeling a mix of emotions. He was happy for her, but also somewhat unwilling, and amidst that unwillingness was a hint of disappointment and a touch of jealousy.
I was overwhelmed with mixed feelings.
Wan Jing patted her on the shoulder.
"It's good that we can get in."
Xie Shi'an came to his senses and nodded slightly.
"Okay, I'll be going now."
"Okay, go back and get some rest."
The moment she turned around, she pursed her lips, and in the sunset, her departing figure appeared somewhat lonely.
From the moment Xie Shi'an decided to participate in the World Championships, she had a premonition that it would be a process of breaking herself down and rebuilding herself. She would need to gradually regain her lost confidence in the competition, but she never expected that she would be broken down and never be able to stand up again.
Before the competition, the media, upon learning that she would be competing in this World Championships, gave it extensive coverage.
On the one hand, they affirmed her competitive spirit of playing despite her injury and placing her on a very high pedestal, as if it would be an injustice if she didn't win the championship. On the other hand, they openly and subtly brought up her little bit of gossip about Jian Changnian.
Xie Shi'an glanced at the newspaper headline and tossed it aside. Just then, someone knocked on the door.
She said in a deep voice, "Please come in."
The team leader came in and handed her a gift box.
"The things your fan club sent were to celebrate your comeback and playing in the game, and they insisted that I hand them to you personally."
"It's not anything valuable, is it?"
"No, I asked, and they said it's just some letters."
Xie Shi'an has developed a habit over the years: he always reads and keeps safe any letters that fans send him.
"Okay, then please tell them thank you."
"Okay, go ahead and open it. You haven't played a game in a long time, the fans must miss you."
A slight smile appeared on Xie Shi'an's lips as she opened the beautifully packaged gift box without any warning. Suddenly, her eyes reddened, and she jumped up, knocking the gift box over.
A dead rat fell out of it.
The team leader was also shocked.
"How could this happen? They can't have gone far. I'm going to find them!"
Xie Shi'an clenched his fists so tightly that his nails dug into his flesh. He was panting heavily and it took him a long time to calm down.
"Don't go. They won't admit it even if you go. Just take this thing out and throw it away."
"Isn't this blatant bullying because they're easy to talk to? The competition's about to start, and they're deliberately trying to mess with your mentality?! They all liked you so much before..."
The team leader's eyes reddened as he spoke.
Xie Shi'an gave a wry smile.
"Go out, leave me alone."
Besides sending her dead rats, there were also people booing her from the stands, shining laser pointers at her, and displaying banners protesting why she was still allowed to stand there and compete.
Various styles and designs are constantly emerging.
In addition, the daily matches were taking a toll on her body. She had never lost so badly before. She lost to Lü Xiaoting, to Natiya, to Anton, and to many other people.
She really tried her best, trying hard to smash, trying hard to defend, trying hard to counterattack, but it seemed like no matter what she did, she couldn't find the trick. Almost everyone she had beaten before, without exception, lost.
Even if she lost, she would fall down again and again and get up again. She felt that she had no regrets because she had tried her best, but other people saw it as a joke. Netizens made highlights, GIFs and memes of her saves and mistakes.
Every day, it was the same cycle. Xie Shi'an felt like a rusty machine on an assembly line, breaking down a little bit every day, just waiting for the last straw to break the camel's back, leaving him completely overwhelmed.
She had struggled and even considered giving up. Xie Shi'an had put the knife to her wrist, but at the moment of cutting, she remembered what Coach Yan had once told her.
I wish her to become a twin star, to win a Grand Slam, and above all, for her to be healthy, happy, and safe.
The blood-stained utility knife fell to the floor.
Xie Shi'an stumbled to his feet, rummaged through the room looking for gauze, and cried as he wrapped it around his wrist.
When she appeared on the field the next day, she had a wristband on her left wrist.
Soon, the final straw broke the camel's back.
She has now suffered five consecutive losses and is at the bottom of the standings, in dire straits. Although there is still one more match to go, if she cannot win today's match against Kim Nam-ji, then her hopes of advancing to the second round will be completely dashed.
If they can defeat Kim Nam-ji, who is currently ranked first in the group, then based on their head-to-head record, they will still have a glimmer of hope.
Unfortunately, that's how things are in this world. When you give it your all, things often don't go as planned. Xie Shi'an used to be able to hold his own against Jin Nanzhi when he was at his peak, let alone now.
She really, really, really tried her best, but there was really nothing she could do. The illness greatly affected her physical strength, limited her performance, and tormented her spirit.
As Kim Nam-ji won the first game by a large margin, the cheers from the Korean team grew even louder, while the stands behind Xie Shi'an began to boo.
"Xie Shi'an, stop embarrassing yourself and get out of here!"
"You didn't get this World Championship spot by bribing the leaders, did you?"
"We strongly demand that the internal selection competition video be released!"
"Homosexuals, get out of the world of badminton!"
...
Amidst their cheers, Xie Shi'an made saves time and time again, falling repeatedly until he finally fell hard, seemingly spraining his ankle, and remained standing for a long time.
Jian Changnian stood on the sidelines, his eyes reddening, and was about to rush forward when Lü Xiaoting held him back tightly.
"The media is watching, it's being broadcast live worldwide. If you go up there now, you'll only embarrass her!"
"But I can't just stand by and watch—"
Before Jian Changnian could finish speaking, perhaps because he spoke a little too loudly, he attracted the attention of the media. Many flashbulbs shone on him, and the expressions on everyone's faces were somewhat malicious.
Her face immediately turned extremely pale, as if she had swallowed a fly, her chest heaving violently, her fists clenched tightly, and her body tense.
She knew that these people not only wanted to see Xie Shi'an embarrassed, but also wanted to see her embarrassed. If she lost her composure on the spot, it would only confirm their rumors of a relationship, and their spittle would be enough to drown Xie Shi'an.
It's ridiculous. Love is a matter between two people, but just because Hsieh Shih-an is a star player, the world number one, and someone who has created miracles in badminton, he has to endure more criticism.
Lü Xiaoting knew she was upset.
"Go ahead and shout it out, just shout it out."
Jian Changnian was stunned, and before she could react, Lü Xiaoting had already cupped her hands into a megaphone shape: "Sister An, you can do it!!!"
The other team members followed suit.
"Yes, let's cheer for Sister An! Aren't they booing her? Let's see who can shout the loudest!"
"Sister An, get up! Don't give up!"
"You'll always be number one in our hearts!"
"Sister An, you are our pride!"
We believe in you!
...
In order to drown out the noise from the stands, the teammates shouted at the top of their lungs, their faces turning red and their necks bulging.
"Come on, help me up."
Wan Jing was short, so in order to be seen by Xie Shi'an, he stood on a chair in the rest area and grabbed a megaphone.
Seeing this scene, Jian Changnian's eyes suddenly welled up with tears. One person rushed up to shout that she had lost her composure, and a group of people cheered for her. So, she didn't seem out of place being caught in the middle.
At least for now, they are still teammates.
Jian Changnian snatched the megaphone from Wan Jing's hand, a tear sliding down her cheek, and shouted at the top of her lungs.
"Xie Shi'an, you must...keep going!"
Although their voices might temporarily suppress negative opinions, they cannot change the course of the entire match.
Despite the commentators praising her as a genius, a goddess who has repeatedly created miracles in desperate situations.
But in the end, she was just an ordinary person.
When the score reached 10:20.