La vie parfaite sous la dynastie Song

Chapitre 45

"Actually, I've always been jealous of you and Xiaojie. Xiaojie is too determined; once she's made up her mind, she'll stick to it. People like that aren't easily tempted, which is why they live so freely. But you're too naive—naive sadness, naive anger, naive happiness. You're clearly stupid and useless, yet you live a more vibrant life than anyone else."

"Yingying, why...why are you saying these things?" I coughed, feeling a slight itch and heat in my throat, before continuing, "You have your own strengths too! You're beautiful, capable, and outstanding. You strive for what you want, so why be jealous of us?"

"But do you know how long it took me to grasp the happiness you obtained so easily?" She suddenly jumped up and yelled at me, her face contorted with rage and grief. "No matter how hard I worked at my old company, I was just a lowly employee, simply because I refused to sleep with the boss; I worked myself to the bone for a project, but all the credit went to others, simply because I didn't have a powerful background. But what about you? You can't do anything, you don't have to do anything, and you easily became the wife of a director of Xu Tian Group, making a man like Xu Lie abandon Xue'er and cherish you like a precious gem.

I tugged at my clothes, feeling a bit dizzy and feverish. Looking at Yingying, I said with difficulty, "Yingying, why would you think that?"

"Why?!" She rushed up to me and shouted, spitting as she spoke. "Why is it that someone can unconditionally clean up your mess when you're just causing trouble, while I have to sacrifice my body to make a living after all my efforts fail?"

"Lin Jialan!" she cried, grabbing my collar, her voice hoarse with sobs, "I hate your naivety, I hate your ignorance, I hate your smooth sailing, so I want you to suffer as much as I have! To be miserable!"

Xiao Yi

2007.8.30 17:40

Chapter 30, The Trap, is complete.

Chapter 31 Struggle in Desperation

Chapter 31 Struggle in Desperation

"Lin Jialan!" she cried, grabbing my collar, her voice hoarse with sobs, "I hate your naivety, I hate your ignorance, I hate your smooth sailing, so I want you to suffer as much as I have! To be miserable!"

I could almost see the sandstorm raging in the desert, and I was walking alone through it. Then countless hands reached out from the ground, grabbing and pulling me, dragging me down. They had all sorts of bloody, mangled faces, but they shouted the same thing: "I hate your naivety, I hate your ignorance, I hate your smooth sailing. We're going to drag you down to hell with us!"

A splitting headache throbbed in my head as I was slammed onto the sofa. I heard the door click open, and Yingying seemed to still be sobbing softly. My chest and my entire body felt strangely hot.

"I thought you did this because I threatened you," a familiar male voice said to Yingying. "Heh, so you hate her just as much?"

"Enough with the nonsense!" Yingying interrupted him angrily. "Give me the money! Here... do whatever you want with me!"

It's so hot...so hot! I tore at my clothes, wondering why it was so hot, hot from the inside out.

It sounded like something being passed around. Then the man chuckled and said, "Take the money. And don't forget your last task."

Only my panting and moans filled the room. After a long while, Yingying said, "I never thought that you, Shao Junyi, would sacrifice yourself to such an extent for a woman. But, is it worth it to push her into someone else's arms, abandon your plans, and suffer Xu Lie's hatred and revenge for her sake?" Yingying spoke in a very calm tone, but the resentment and jealousy in her voice were very clear.

"My affairs are none of your business!" The man, Shao Junyi, roared like a hedgehog whose tail had been stepped on. "Take your money and get out!" With that, the door was flung open, and Yingying was pushed out while shouting.

Taking advantage of that moment, I desperately mustered my strength and rushed towards the door, but just as the iron gate was in front of me, I was violently pulled back. Immediately, a pair of strong, powerful arms gripped me tightly, and a cold laugh sneered in my ear: "You think you can escape?!"

"Shao Junyi, you bastard, let me go!" I struggled desperately, hitting and even biting him, the taste of blood filling my mouth. He yelled and then slapped me hard across the face. I felt a burning pain on my left cheek, but my body was already lifted into the air and held in his arms.

"Let me go!!" I cried out, "I'm Xu Lie's wife! If you touch me, he won't let you get away with it!!"

With a "bang," I was thrown onto the bed, feeling dizzy and unwell, and my body felt like it was on fire.

He turned and locked the door, then walked step by step toward me, who was huddled at the head of the bed, his face full of cold laughter and hatred: "Let you go? But are you willing to let Xue'er go? Today I'm going to let him see with his own eyes how you're having an affair, and see whether he wants you or Xue'er!"

"What...what are you saying?" I hugged my trembling body tightly, looking at him in disbelief. "You said...you want Xu Lie to see this? To see...whether he wants Xue'er...or me?"

"Yes, Mrs. Xu." Shao Jun smiled and approached me, taking off his clothes as he did so. "You just had the juice laced with the aphrodisiac I gave Yingying. Tell me, if Xu Lie comes later and sees you and me naked and entangled in bed, wouldn't that be quite amusing?"

"No—!!" I screamed shrilly, rolling off the bed, trying to escape through the door, but I was violently pulled back. A pair of iron-like hands gripped my shoulders, and a demon from hell roared in my ear, "So what if you don't want to? Do you think I'll let you go? Do you think I won't get my revenge for the pain you've inflicted on Xue'er?!"

Amidst his cries filled with pain and resentment, I turned my head and saw the moon gradually rising outside the window, silvery and round, yet lacking the bright clarity of the desert, which could easily paint a world of endless silver sands. I saw the deep blue curtains undulating with the breeze outside, like endless ocean waves, but how could they compare to the boundless desert sea, magnificent and awe-inspiring? I saw a heart hanging by the window, its last piece of flesh rotten, its last drop of blood drained, crimson, gently falling in the wind, but how could that crimson compare to the poignant beauty of the silvery threads of blood left in the desert?

My vision went completely black, and then, amidst the violent shaking and the immense force that threw me onto the bed, I could see nothing more. I curled my lips into a soft smile; the biological clock I'd developed over the past seven days, like a dutiful guardian, reminded me that it was better to go back, better to go back. So I closed my eyes, burying myself completely in the darkness, and lost… consciousness.

I opened my eyes, sat up abruptly, and chuckled. A world of endless silver sands, a vast and undulating desert ocean, and... I turned around abruptly, met Yi Han's astonished gaze, smiled sweetly, and blurted out: "Green robe, silver threads, tattered blood."

"Young Master?" Yi Han looked at me in a daze, then his expression softened gently. "Won't you rest a little longer, Young Master?"

“Hmm~” I shook my head, took his arm and stood up. “Let’s hurry and get out of this desert. I miss Yunyan and Uncle Li so much! Uncle Li must be so worried when he finds out we’re missing.”

"Galan, what happened?" Zimo's voice carried a rare hint of panic.

'Don't call me Jialan!' I looked up at the ghost with a faint smile. 'Zimo, call me Lin Yu. Lin Jialan... is dead.'

"Galan!" Zimo suddenly appeared in front of me, looking at me with a tense expression. "What happened? Why can't I access your memories? I only have scattered fragments... those fragments..."

"Stop talking!!" I yelled, crouching down. Yi Han rushed over to support me, and I took a few deep breaths. I looked up and smiled at Zi Mo, who was still in shock. "Hey, Zi Mo, for now... let's not talk about it, okay?" I don't want to think about that silvery moonlight, I don't want to think about that dark blue curtains, I don't want to think about that rotting heart, and I especially don't want to think about... that hideous face...

“Galan—!!” Zi Mo stared at me in disbelief, his brown pupils reflecting the night sky and stars, yet dark and turbulent as if a storm was brewing within them. “Who?! Who did this to you?!”

"Ahhhhhh!" I covered my ears tightly and screamed with all my might. No matter what Yihan asked, I just screamed and screamed. My already hoarse throat became even more hoarse and unpleasant. In the end, I ran out of strength and could only fall into Yihan's arms, panting. Even though my heart was filled with such desolation and pain, I couldn't shed a single tear.

My voice was hoarse as I pleaded, "Please don't ask anymore, please don't ask anymore..."

"Galan, don't be like this." Zimo's voice had never sounded so lost and heartbroken. He reached out his fingers to touch my face, but found he couldn't. His eyes darkened, and he said softly, "Galan, cry."

'Why should I cry?' I smiled beautifully at him, then looked around. 'The desert here is so beautiful, the moonlight so gentle, Yi Han's embrace so warm, Zi Mo's voice so lovely, why should I cry?'

"Young Master." Yi Han gently pulled me into his arms, just like when he held me in the coldest night when we first entered the desert, wrapping me in his whole body and saying softly, "No matter what happens, I will always be by your side."

No matter... they're all by my side. I slowly clutched the blue dress, wanting to laugh, but found I couldn't.

Zi Mo's gentle voice, carrying unspeakable pain and silence, echoed in the vast desert: "Galan, if you want to cry, then cry."

"What are you all talking about?" I tried to force a smile, but tears started falling. I tried hard to wipe them away, but they kept falling, and the more I wiped, the more they fell. Yi Han gently placed a hand on the back of my head, letting me bury my face in his chest, and said in a cool yet warm voice, "Young Master, cry."

From soft sobs to heart-wrenching cries, I buried my face in his chest, calling Xu Lie's name over and over again. Why, even though there was no future, did I feel so hopeless? Why did I truly see the end of our marriage? Why, when we clearly loved each other, were we ultimately forced to separate?

"More than a hundred years later, the Tarakan Desert has shrunk considerably, but it is still known as the Devil's Continent because it contains a terrifying and mysterious black desert. This black desert has no visible vegetation, no undulating sand dunes; the surrounding dunes are all roughly the same height, like flat, endless buns. From any angle, the view is the same, devoid of any sign of life. Every few hours, sandstorms blow through the black desert; though not strong, they deplete the body's water, causing irritability and even mental instability. But the most terrifying thing about the black desert is not these things."

Zimo paused, watching me swallow hard, then smiled and continued, "In the Black Desert, thirsty, exhausted travelers might suddenly see a distant azure lake, fertile crops, herds of cattle and sheep, and beautiful women gracefully dancing. But no matter how hard they chase that oasis, they can never reach it, until they die of exhaustion. That's the Black Desert's greatest trap—the devil's temptation." (The above two paragraphs are borrowed from *Ghost Blows Out the Light*, oops! I really couldn't find any information about shifting sand deserts myself.) 'A mirage?' I nodded, thinking, 'Don't worry, Zimo, I won't be fooled by these.' Even so, I was still a little uneasy. The ten days of desert travel I'd already endured were inhumanly arduous; how much more so this terrifying Black Desert. But hardship is good; perhaps the physical pain can temporarily make me forget the pain in my heart. Otherwise, I'm afraid I'll go crazy.

We drank water, stored water, searched for food, and stocked up on supplies that could be carried for a long time. Then, Yihan and I embarked on our journey through the devilish Black Desert. The first part of the journey was uneventful, not much different from before. Unless the yellow sand completely blocked out the sun and the weather wasn't too hot, we always traveled by night and rested by day. The heat, the sandstorms, the thirst—we could only quench our thirst with a sip of water—and the exhaustion, frustration, and fear—we comforted and warmed each other.