"Do you want me to leave?" I asked him.
He didn't answer me.
We lay in bed, back to back, without saying a word all night.
The plan to move has been put on hold, but our arguments are becoming more and more frequent. Whenever I excitedly tell him about my work, he always coldly says, "We're growing further and further apart."
There was no support, no encouragement; perhaps he never considered that I was working hard because I wanted to be worthy of him, and I didn't want to lose to his ex-girlfriend.
That same night three years ago, we discussed moving again.
"We need to move to another room; I have nowhere to put my things," I told him.
He sat on the bed reading a book, seemingly ignoring what I was saying.
"Did you hear me?" I asked him.
"If you want to move it, you can move it yourself." He didn't even glance at me.
"Do you mean we should break up?" I was furious with him.
"Anyway, I'm not good enough for you," he said.
I was furious and dragged him out of bed. He pushed me away, and we started fighting. Before this day, we hadn't had sex for two months.
I didn't cry. He threw me, and it hurt a lot, but I refused to shed a single tear.
"Let's break up," I said.
He did not object.
I sold the property we jointly owned, paid off the bank loan, and deposited the remaining half into his account. From then on, we had nothing to do with each other.
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Chapter Four
Novel txt Tian+
In the first year after our breakup, we couldn't even be friends.
The year after our breakup, he introduced me to a business deal. We would occasionally talk on the phone, and I learned that he was seeing a girl. The girl was ten years younger than him and was the secretary of one of his friends. I met her once. She admired Ah Zheng, just as I had admired him back then; unlike me, she didn't feel unworthy of Ah Zheng, and she didn't think Ah Zheng needed a woman as outstanding as him.
"He's a very manly man," the girl told me.
I used to know that Ah Zheng was a strong man, and I thought of myself as a weak woman. I worked hard for him, and love was my motivation for living. Unfortunately, what Ah Zheng wanted was not a strong woman like me who was actually a weak woman, but a woman without ambition or drive.
Three years after our breakup, A-Zheng told me that he was getting married.
"She wants a formal title, and I'm not getting any younger," Ah-Zheng said, scratching his head.
I had forgotten that he was already thirty-eight years old.
"Congratulations! Will you invite me to your wedding?" I asked him.
"Are you free?" he asked me.
"This is the first time I've ever attended a wedding hosted by an ex-lover. I'll definitely come."
"There's something that's been bothering me," A-Zheng said.
"What's up?"
"I'm sorry for hitting you that day," he said.
"I hit you first."
"I shouldn't have fought back."
"It was impossible not to fight back then," I said with a laugh.
He smiled too.
Ah Zheng's wedding banquet was held at a hotel in Tsim Sha Tsui. Ah Zheng looked very handsome today. When we were together before, I also dreamed about our wedding. I only thought about my own bride look and never thought about what the groom would be like.
My wedding gift to A-Zheng was an oil painting, which he could hang in the living room. I thought for a long time about what gift to give him, and finally, selfishly, I thought of giving him an oil painting so that he would always have something of mine in his home.
I ran into A-Zheng in the corridor outside the banquet hall.
"Thank you for coming to my wedding," he said to me.
"There's something I've forgotten—" I said.
"What's up?"
"Did you take those snow boots, or did I? It was all so messy when we moved, I forgot," I said.
"I took it," he said.
Perhaps it's just wishful thinking on my part, but I feel that A-Zheng still loves me; he hasn't forgotten those snow boots.
There's something else I haven't told Ah-cheng. Later, I bought back the apartment in North Point that we used to live in together. I often stand on the balcony and think about the times he held me. I still believe that no one will love me like he did.
Standing on the balcony, I wish it would snow in Hong Kong, so that Ah-Zheng could wear the snow boots I bought for him.
—The End—