¡Qué ganas de sentir la brisa primaveral!

Capítulo 46

Three years have passed, and I've missed so much time that I can't even piece together the past and present of him completely. I feel like they've become two different people.

The door moved as if someone had come in. I was startled, closed my eyes tightly, and gripped the dagger tightly under the covers.

Although He Nan accepted Mo Li's conditions to keep me here, I didn't treat this place as a foolproof safe. Before going to bed, I searched for something useful and finally chose a small dagger, which I placed on the medicine cabinet against the wall, as if afraid I wouldn't see it.

The small dagger with a brass handle, double-edged, was something He Nan often used; it was very sharp. I took it to bed, thinking that He Nan might suddenly transform into a half-orc and run in in the middle of the night, and I would stab him to death. Although the possibility was very small, it was better to have a knife in hand than nothing, just in case.

The door opened, followed by very light footsteps that walked straight toward where I was lying. When a person's eyes are closed, their hearing is particularly acute; I could even hear the faint rustling of fabric as they walked. They stopped right next to the bed.

I clenched my teeth so tightly that I stopped breathing. After a moment of silence, I felt a cool sensation on my face. It was him who reached out and touched my face.

I couldn't bear it any longer. As I opened my eyes, I suddenly struck out, the sharp dagger flashing towards him. The hand that was about to hit my face flipped over, grabbing my wrist at the last second. I felt a tingling numbness in my wrist, and I could no longer hold onto the dagger. I heard it clatter to the edge of the bed, and then it fell into the thick carpet in front of the bed. My mission was cut short.

"What are you doing?" A slightly angry voice rang out above me. I looked up in slow motion, stunned, and saw the face that had been hovering in front of my tightly closed eyes—Mo Li's face.

2

“You, you’re back…” I stammered.

"What are you doing? You're sleeping so soundly you're not even breathing." Lord Mo Li's expression was unusually grim.

"It's because you scared me..." I thought to myself, but when I saw him come back, I was only happy, and the slight fright and complaint quickly disappeared.

I thought you would never come back.

He didn't press the matter. He bent down, picked up the dagger from the ground, glanced at it, and his eyes twitched slightly.

My face turned red.

"That, that's just in case..." I explained.

"Just in case, this kind of paper cutter won't work," he said, then casually placed the dagger on the medicine cabinet beside the bed and said, "Go in a little further."

I didn't understand what he meant at first, but my body obeyed. I watched him crawl to the edge of the bed, sit down, untie his cloak, and finally lie down next to me.

His series of actions were so natural, as if he had done them a million times before. After lying down, he immediately closed his eyes and said, "Go to sleep."

Silence filled the cabin. I remained in the position of stepping aside, my body stiff as a stone from his previous actions, the only sound the frantic pounding of my own heart—loud enough to wake even a dead man.

But he didn't react at all, his eyes closed, his profile a silent and beautiful curve.

This wasn't the first time Mo Li and I had shared a bed, but it was always out of necessity. It had never been as natural as it was today, so natural... like an ordinary couple.

Why did he do that?

I don't know how long I stood there frozen, my mind a mess, and I gradually forgot how to breathe. Suddenly, he turned around, opened his eyes, and met mine.

I gasped for breath, realizing I was almost suffocating. We were only inches apart; his warm breath touched my face and eyes. I heard my own voice, tumbling out, "Why...?"

He didn't speak, just stared at me silently, his dark pupils holding the deepest allure in the darkness.

What could I say? I could only continue blushing. Looking at that face, I didn't even have the courage to ask a question.

What else is there to ask? If it's what he wants, if it's something I can give him, I'll offer it to him with open arms, including myself.

I've known since I was thirteen that I want to be with him, no matter what kind of relationship we have.

"Since I've left you here, this place is safe." He suddenly spoke, his voice hoarse, seemingly unconcerned that he was facing a ripe, red tomato.

"......"

"There are many dangers, but you are with me."

"......."

"I have many things to do. If I have to leave you temporarily, you must wait for me to come back."

"......"

I didn't answer him for a while, and then, after a moment, he added something with a hint of helplessness.

Why are you crying?

He never remembered me, but he still wanted me to be with him, just like before. Overwhelmed with grief and joy, I burst into tears in front of him. I could only wipe my face with whatever I could grab. My throat was blocked, and I could no longer make a sound.

I don't know how long I cried. At first, he tried to tell me to stop, but then he gave up. Finally, he reached out, hugged me, and let me cry.

My body fell into his arms. He had a calming and warm scent about him, the kind that made me feel that even if the sky were to fall, I could laugh it off. He held me for a long time, his brows furrowed, but his touch gentle. My eyes were red and swollen from crying, my vision blurred, and finally I couldn't cry anymore. I collapsed against him, burying my face in his chest, only soft sobs remaining.

"Are you done crying?"

I moved my head, but out of shame, and because of the long hug, I had no strength left, and no desire to lift my head.

He held me on his back, letting me lie on top of him, his voice low and hoarse, as if talking to himself.

"How could it be you?"

I didn't understand, and I looked up, sobbing, only to be pressed down by him again. His hand was on the back of my head, like he was holding down a cat, and he said, "I have so many things to do, it's too much trouble for you to keep bothering me like this."

I froze, all the previous emotion vanished, and my heart sank. I struggled to get off him to talk, but I couldn't break free from her grasp. Then I heard him whisper, "But it's good to have you clinging to me like this."

After saying that, he lifted me up with both hands. Before I could react, our noses were touching and our eyes were meeting. He looked at me, and then, as we breathed together, he gently kissed my lips.

His lips, so strong and cold, were so soft and slightly cool, like a feather touching my heart, causing a slight ache.

I know I love him, this man who makes my heart ache even when I kiss him. I have been secretly loving him for many years without his knowledge, when he forgot me, and when he left me.

It felt so good to have him by my side. When I was tired from crying, I lay on top of him, wrapped my arms around his neck, buried my face in his chest, and felt his steady, powerful heartbeat beneath my cheeks—the best lullaby.

But I couldn't sleep. The sound of my heartbeat reminded me of poverty. I whispered to him, "Can you ask He Nan to remove the worms from my body? Will it be dangerous?"

He seemed to be falling asleep, his voice growing hoarse and raspy. "He Nan won't fail, don't worry. Your martial arts are poor, you can't even protect yourself. Rather than having it coveted by others, it's safer to take it out."

"I meant you..."

He didn't answer me, probably because he disdained to answer such a question that questioned his abilities.

I had no choice but to try again, "What did you promise him? Don't let him take advantage of you."

He didn't say anything, and all my enthusiasm was left unanswered.

I felt suffocated and quietly looked up. My eyes had already adjusted to the dim light in the room, and I saw that he had his eyes closed.

It was as if he had fallen asleep.

I couldn't take my eyes off him and stared at him for a long time. My love from my youth, that slender and tall boy, had transformed into such a powerful man without my knowledge. Even with his eyes closed, he exuded an aura of oppression.

3

This change left me bewildered.

A long, black whip hung loosely by the bedside, its tip trailing beside the pillow. I didn't pay much attention to it at first, but after staring at it for a while, I felt a strange sensation and couldn't help but look at it a few more times.

"Ah!" I suddenly exclaimed.

He suddenly opened his eyes and pushed me to the inside of the bed with one hand.

He pressed me face down onto the bed, and I could only utter muffled sounds, "Mogao, that whip is..."

He quickly realized there was nothing amiss in the room, and finally let go of my hand so I could look up. His expression wasn't very pleasant.

I can understand; if I were woken up in the middle of the night, I wouldn't be too happy either.

I still couldn't believe it. I grabbed the whip and examined it closely. The heavy, black handle had a tiny, slightly shiny tip—the cold light emanating from the familiar golden silk cord. It was indeed the whip he used to use.

I remember losing the whip when we fell down the broken bridge, and he had been whipping himself empty-handed ever since, until the ranchers provided him with a long leather whip. But now it's right in front of me, perfectly intact.

"Why did it come back?" I couldn't help but be surprised.

"I got it back from Timur." He spoke with his eyes narrowed, suppressing a yawn. His rare display of languor was so captivating that I was mesmerized for a long time.

By the time I came to my senses and understood, his eyes were already almost closed again.

I pressed him for answers before he went to sleep: "You ran into them? How did you run into them?"

He frowned, and seeing my anxious expression, he probably knew I wouldn't be able to sleep if I didn't tell him. Although he was still frowning, he still said, "I caught up with them, killed some, and some escaped."

I was so shocked I stammered, "Where are the elders?"

“They’re not here. They must have gone into the mountains. The Han Chinese leader isn’t here either.” He casually tossed my hair aside.

"Is this all you're doing today?"

"Of course, you said they were lying in ambush on the only way into the mountains, that the elders were colluding with foreign tribes, and that they had an unknown mysterious person backing them up. So I went to find out what was going on."

"Did you find out who those people came from?" I knew he probably didn't know my identity yet, otherwise he wouldn't have been completely unresponsive when he came back, but I was still inexplicably terrified.

“Those people were all assassins, refusing to speak, but I examined their bodies. Several of them still bore the branding marks of Mo soldiers, so this matter is indeed inextricably linked to Mo. Strange, what do they want you for? Is Mo also interested in our religion's sacred artifacts? Or did those old fogies use you to curry favor and say something to them?”

My lips trembled, and I was afraid he would notice, so I could only bite them hard. Fortunately, he didn't seem to want to continue the discussion. He just turned to the side and pushed my shoulder hard.

"Turn around."

He pushed me so I turned my back to him, and I immediately felt a warm embrace around me. He hugged me from behind, placed one hand on my chest, and rested his chin on the top of my head. "Sleep."

It was quiet behind me, and it took me a long time to calm down. All I could hear was his breathing, even and deep. He had been tracking those people and fighting with them, going back and forth every day. I don't know how much energy he had spent. Even a strong man would be exhausted. He had fallen asleep quickly after I woke him up several times.

But my mind was in turmoil, and I couldn't sleep. I tossed and turned, thinking, what if he knew everything? What if the elders revealed my true identity? No one had yet exposed those treacherous old men's collusion with the foreign tribes. What good could they possibly do by coming up the mountain? Maybe they were just setting a trap for him to walk right into.

And then there's Zhu Yue, that woman who appeared out of nowhere and wanted to imprison Mo Li on the mountain. Every time I think of her, I can't help but feel a chill.

Finally, how many people actually know that I am Princess Ping An? This speculation terrified me. In the darkness, I bit my lip to control its trembling, and then, involuntarily, struggled to turn my body over inch by inch until I could see him.

He was truly exhausted; he didn't even wake up when I turned over like this. I curled up closer, silently pressing against his chest in the darkness. The strong, rhythmic sound of his heartbeat mingled with my own, a sound that brought me peace.

Although I knew when I was thirteen that nothing in this world could be changed by my will in the slightest, at this moment, I still infinitely wished that this night could continue indefinitely, and that tomorrow would never come.

4

The result of unrestrained crying and excessive mental exertion was that when I finally fell asleep, I slept like a dead person; it would be more accurate to say that I lost consciousness.

As dawn broke, I felt a warm presence leave the person beside me. I must have expressed my dissatisfaction, reaching out to grab him and try to hold him back. But a light yet firm force pulled my hand back onto itself. Then came the sound of clothes being put together. A man stood up, blocking the morning light. I struggled to open my eyes, only to see a blurry silhouette in the shadows.

I don't even know if it's true.

When I was finally able to open my eyes fully conscious, bright light was already shining through the cracks in the wooden cabin window all the way to the head of the bed.

The bed was empty except for me. It seemed that everything from last night—Mo Lijing pushing open the door in the dead of night, his breathing, heartbeat, embrace, and those words that made me so happy and sad—was just a dream.

I sat alone on the bed in a daze for a long time, then jumped up and frantically searched for any trace of his return. When I saw the brass knife on the medicine cabinet, it was like a blind man seeing the light. I grabbed it in my hand.

The wooden door creaked open, and He Nan pushed it open and came in. He was quite startled to see me clutching the knife tightly and turning my head to glare at him. He had one foot in the doorway, but hesitated to put the other foot in, and his voice sounded like he was stammering.

"What, what are you going to do now?"

When I saw it was him, I was filled with utter disappointment, and my whole face fell.

He Nan breathed a sigh of relief when he saw that I didn't intend to pounce on him, then he looked at me with a knowing expression. "You're looking for him? He's gone. He left early this morning."