Scharlachroter Regen überflutet die Stadt

Kapitel 119

Hearing him say that, I suddenly thought of the child from many years ago with whom Xiaoyu had a shallow connection—was it a daughter? If so, I wonder who she would resemble more?!

"That girl, does she look familiar?" I blurted out, unable to control my emotions.

Xiao Yi's initially joking gaze gradually turned cool. He frowned slightly, seemingly deep in thought, and after a long while slowly said, "It seems I've seen you before, very familiar indeed..." His eyes suddenly froze, "It's almost like..."

"Xiaoyu," I said, pursing my lips.

Xiao Yi leaned back and laughed hollowly, "It's been so many years since I've really looked at her. Now that you mention it, she really does look like I remember her."

I quickly stood up, saying only, "I'll go check if the medicine is ready."

"Sister, you can't hide this from me forever." Xiao Yi suddenly tugged at my sleeve, sighed, and said hoarsely.

I was slightly moved. I looked at Xiao Yi, and although I hesitated for a moment, I still said, "You and Xiaoyu once had a child that was never born."

As soon as the words left her mouth, a tremor ran through her body. She couldn't bear to meet his gaze, but continued, "Right after you were betrothed, Consort Lin, who was also Princess Yu Ning's mother, discovered Xiao Yu's pregnancy. We secretly played a trick on her, which is why Xiao Yu became a concubine in Fifth Prince's mansion. I thought that would protect her and her child." The scene from that day resurfaced vividly in her mind, causing her unbearable pain. "All she wanted was to give birth to your child."

There was complete silence around me. I turned around and saw Xiao Yi with a blank expression on his face, his eyes fixed on me.

I smiled bitterly. "Perhaps too many people didn't want him to come into this world. He really is gone, just like that, gone without a clear reason. Even Xiaoyu's last wish has been shattered."

Xiao Yi's lips trembled slightly, but he could no longer speak.

"It's probably for the best that your last connection with Xiaoyu has been severed." Forcing back tears, she smiled and said, "At least you should know what she's been through all these years."

Xiao Yi's gaze froze as he silently stared at me, his quiet expression almost overwhelming me. After a long while, he finally struggled to his feet and walked towards the courtyard outside, alone, his back to me.

He gazed into the distance.

That night, Xiao Yi seemed quite energetic after having dinner, and even glanced at a book. I sent Le Mei to rest and stayed by Xiao Yi's side.

What started as a joke suddenly stopped Xiao Yi's laughter. "Sister, this time I'm really leaving."

I stared at him, stunned, and speechless.

Xiao Yi sighed, "Judging from Le Mei's expression, she's determined to come with me. If anything happens to her, I'll have to entrust everything to my sister. Le Mei is going to follow me, and soon I'll be able to see Yu Ning again. Who else... I'd be reluctant to part with?"

I nodded silently and quickly turned around to ask someone to fetch Xiaoyu.

Xiao Yi grabbed me, "No, sister, you can't call her here. I've already ruined half my life, I can't drag her down with me even on my deathbed."

He smiled faintly and squeezed my hand. "Don't call anyone else. I'll be at ease as long as my sister sees me off."

"Back then, I sent your brother off in the same way." I looked at him and forced a smile. "I never imagined that I would have to send you off in the same way. Your Xiao family owes me so many tears."

He sighed, "Sister, in the next life I will still call you sister. In the next life, I want to wait to see your hair turn white and see you surrounded by children and grandchildren."

I held back my tears. "Is there anything else you want to say?"

"Sister, don't be sad. Your brother just misses Yu Ning too much. All these years, she has suffered so much waiting in the underworld. In this life, I wronged her while she was alive, and in the next life, I will spend a lifetime making amends. As for... as for Yu Chang, I, I, have wronged her, wronged her, and even harmed her in this life, but I did love her after all, and I have no regrets. I have no way to repay her, I only hope that she will no longer be sad because of me. Fifth Master will definitely make her happy. I believe in Fifth Master and I wish Yu Chang well. I am willing to use my blessings for three lifetimes to bless her."

He spoke calmly, a smile playing on his lips. As he closed his eyes slightly, a long tear slid down the corner of his eye.

I stared at him silently, lost in thought, and it took me a long time to come to my senses. I gently tucked his outstretched hand under the covers, wiped the cold sweat from his forehead with my sleeve, and straightened his pillow. Once everything was settled, I sat back down beside him, unable to hold back any longer, and burst into hysterical sobs.

Le Mei seemed to wake up with a start, her hair disheveled as she stumbled in. She stood three meters away, stunned, staring at the person on the bed for a long time, her eyes empty and tearless. She approached step by step, and said blankly, "I've guarded you for so many years. Now that I'm with my master, I can give him a proper explanation. In the afterlife, I won't compete with my master for you. In this life, I've received so much good fortune from my master. In the netherworld, I'll be a maid again, guarding you and my master. Le Mei will follow you through countless lifetimes."

Having said that, he rushed towards the bed, and with a "bang," half of his body was already leaning against the edge of the bed. Crimson blood splattered onto Xiao Yixiangning's face.

The entire palace was suddenly filled with cries, to the point that I doubted whether I could ever escape this eerie place.

Upon entering Cining Palace, we found the Empress Dowager worshipping Buddha in the inner room. We heard that Xiaoyu had brought her son and Fifth Sister-in-law's daughter to pay their respects, so they stayed in the palace for dinner as well. We wandered around Cining Palace for a while before finally finding Xiaoyu feeding Sining in the outer room.

"Where's Nuannuan?" I asked Xiaoyu. Xiaoyu didn't know what was going on and quickly said, "She's in the side hall with Ting'er, coaxing Jingyu. Although that child doesn't get along with me, he's very close to Ting'er. At first, he was distant when he saw me, but after spending more time with Ting'er, he often comes to my residence to play. When he sees me, he even knows how to bow. It's clear that Yi'er knows how to discipline the child."

Si Ning pushed the dining table aside, looked at me intently, her eyes blinking, and asked, "Auntie, where's my father? Where's my mother?"

I didn't know what to say for a moment, so I just wiped his little mouth with a handkerchief. When Nuannuan heard that I was back, she quickly pulled Ting'er and Jingyu out. After Ting'er and Jingyu bowed to me, they ran to Xiaoyu's side and stayed close to her.

Nuannuan leaned closer to me and asked, "Auntie, did my dad say he's coming to pick me up?"

I paused for a moment, then reached out and gently stroked Nuannuan's temple. "Nuannuan, your father has taken on a temporary mission and is leading troops out to fight. He told you to be obedient, and when he comes back, you will be a grown-up young woman. He wants to marry you off in a grand and glorious way, and choose the most outstanding man in the world for you."

Xiaoyu listened to my words and sensitively raised her head. I looked at her, and she understood me in an instant, then lowered her head again.

Xiaoyu got up, pulled Ting'er and Jingyu along, and said to me, "I'll take the children to the Empress Dowager to say goodbye." Then she left silently.

I turned back to look at Si Ning. "Si Ning, you must study hard. Your father said you are the hope of the Xiao family. He hopes you will grow into a strong tree to shelter your family from the wind and rain. So you must eat well so that you can grow up quickly."

Si Ning stared wide-eyed, nodded, picked up the bowl, scooped up a large spoonful of rice, stuffed it into her mouth, and swallowed it without even chewing. "Auntie, Si Ning is finished eating."

"Okay, good girl."

Nuannuan looked at Sining and suddenly said, "Sining, go to the side hall and go play with Fifth Aunt and the others."

Si Ning was led out by several maids. Nuan Nuan suddenly looked at me and said, "Aunt, please tell me the truth. My father... he is he..." Nuan Nuan looked at me nervously, tears welling up in her eyes.

I nodded. "Your father... he went to see your mother. He misses her so much."

Nuannuan's tears fell in large drops as she looked at me, biting her lip tightly. "How could he only think of Mother and not us... Does he not want us anymore? How could he bear to part with us?"

"Nuan Nuan, your Aunt Le has gone with him. You must take good care of Si Ning."

Nuannuan buried herself in my arms, already sobbing uncontrollably.

As I walked to the side hall, I stood outside the door and heard Ting'er's soft voice, "Aunt Hua, what's wrong?"

Xiaoyu quickly wiped away her tears, "It's nothing, it's just the wind, it got in my eyes."

Xiaoyu, Yi'er never wanted to burden you even in death. All the blessings he had in his three lifetimes were for your happiness. You... must cherish this blessing.

I sit by the window and leisurely sip my tea.

Since Si Ning was still young, her fifth brother took her away and raised her in his own residence, where Xiao Yu took care of her.

Considering that Nuannuan is older and a more sensitive girl, I was afraid Xiaoyu wouldn't be able to handle her, so I took Siyu in. This child seems to have grown up overnight, becoming increasingly sensible. She even became quieter in the palace. Suddenly, two more small memorial tablets appeared in my little Buddhist shrine. Looking at those scattered tablets, I suddenly felt that the distance between life and death was nothing more than this small tablet.

Chapter Five of the Main Text: You Don't See Me

As the year drew to a close, I began to deal with the affairs of the inner palace ladies, always keeping myself busy to forget some things. Finally, one day, a familiar figure burst into the Eastern Palace, her brows furrowed as she rushed straight at me. I smiled at her, my gaze immediately returning to the ledgers of the inner palace's accounting department. The woman smashed all the teacups, bowls, and jewels in my palace, still looking indignant.

Without even looking up, I handed him the teacup beside me, and inevitably, another earth-shattering sound rang out.

"Feeling better now?" I smiled. "Not enough, I have plenty more in my inner room."

Her originally pretty eyebrows were now even more twisted.

"Hey—" she shouted angrily. The fact that she could shout that meant this dramatic affair should finally be over. A few years ago, probably none of the porcelain in my palace would have survived. Such things had happened before, which is why I used to display many silver decorations in the Zhongcui Pavilion of the mountain villa.

He put down the ledger and slowly stood up. "Your temper has improved somewhat in recent years, hasn't it, Murong?"

She is Murong Qi, the Murong Qi who can only be controlled by Nangong Jin, the deputy master of Nalan Manor.

"On my way here, I heard Liu Shang say all that." She plopped down in the wicker chair, perhaps feeling thirsty after venting her anger for so long, but the teapot was already broken on the ground.

I glared at Liu Shang with a smirk, "Liu Shang, are you complaining that your master has too many porcelain pieces?"

Liu Shang quickly lowered his head, "I met Miss Murong in the Imperial Garden. She just asked about your situation, and I just mentioned it casually."

I waved my hand, letting her clean up the mess, and sat down myself, chuckling softly, "Only Sister Murong would care about me like this."

She paused. "So you're going to live such a pathetic life?"

"It's alright, it's alright." I took the tea from Liu Shang and handed it to Murong.

"The you who used to be so decisive and unyielding—have you really changed? Wasn't this the same person you used to be? Could you really tolerate this cannibalistic set of social norms?!"

"Sister, if things don't change, you'll be living in your own imagination and you'll never be able to adapt to the changes around you."

"I think you've gone mad from being a sham empress."

"Are you really determined to be a widowed empress dowager? Will you be satisfied with erecting a memorial arch for your chastity a hundred years from now?!"

I smiled, then couldn't help but sigh, "So what else do you want?"

"Shouldn't we live our own lives? Aren't you bored staying in such a big palace?"

I squinted my eyes. After being so busy for so long, I had forgotten what loneliness was.

"I have a place I want to go," I said quickly after a moment's thought.

Before the words were even finished, and before Murong could react, a cold voice came from outside the door, "Hmph, where have you been causing me trouble again?"

I pursed my lips and forced a fake smile. "Oh, what a big day it is today that the Regent has come here?"

Lu Xiu intended to step into the hall, but upon seeing the mess on the ground, there was nowhere to put his foot down. He cleared his throat and looked at me with a mixture of anger and amusement. "Heh, is the Empress checking the porcelain in the palace's inventory for fakes?"

"The Regent was right. Your Highness, you should also do something about this. The material is so flimsy."

"What's the point of making it solid? Isn't it just to make a sound for the Empress? Who cares if it's solid or not?"

Lu Xiu glanced at me as he spoke, "If you dare to leave this mess for me to run away with, I'll sell your son and daughter. You try running away!"

I watched him leave with a wry smile. Murong also came over and pointed to Lu Xiu in the distance, "I think this man is not bad. You might as well consider it."

"You'd better say something unpleasant to me. I haven't heard from Nangong for quite some time..."

"Nangong is neither male nor female, it makes me so angry."

"How can you talk about your man like that?"

"He actually brought a courtesan back to the manor, saying he wanted to take her as a concubine."

"No wonder he hasn't been running around like this lately."

"Are you on my side?"

"Well... he's a man after all."

"In short, I was so angry that I set fire to half of his house."

"Yes, that's definitely your style."

"He actually had the audacity to ask me for repair fees."

"Yes, that's exactly what he would say."

"Hmph, since I'm already here, let him take as many concubines as he wants."

I pulled her over and said, "Hey, compare yourself to me. Whether it was before or now, I probably can't even count all the people in our family. We might as well just ignore them."

"You really didn't care?"

"I don't really care."

"Why?" Murong frowned again.

“Because,” I smiled, “we have to accept these things whether we want to or not. If we care too much, we’ll only suffer; if we don’t care, we can live a more comfortable life.”