Young Prime Minister, a Hermit

Chapter 154

A thousand years later

Still like a transparent soul, it looked down from the sky.

You wave gently in the air.

Farewell

Love in this life

Please forget me in the dust of a thousand years.

goodbye

Eternal Lover

You will be buried deep in my rolling tears.

Waiting alone

Xiao Yi

2008.5.9 19:48

Chapter 28: If Heaven Has Feelings (End)

Next update: Wednesday, May 14th. The content will be a side story: Even the longest love has its end. It mainly tells the story of Xu Lie, Zi Mo, and Jia Lan during Jia Lan's amnesia-stricken transition period.

Thank you so much, Yan Xia, for providing the link. I also think "Tears of a Thousand Years" is a pretty good setting. ^_^

Insert bookmark

Postscript to Volume Three

Postscript to Volume Three

Epilogue to Volume Three: If Heaven Had Feelings, Heaven Would Grow Old

The wind howls, the rain falls, we are so close yet worlds apart.

Tears of the mortal world, the heavens are heartless, why did we go together but not return together?

The lines "Though we are close, we are worlds apart" and "Why did we go together but not return?" encapsulate all the tragedy and helplessness in Volume Three, "If Heaven Had Feelings, Heaven Would Grow Old."

Volume Three, a full 150,000 words, follows Lin Yu, Yi Han, Zi Mo, Xu Lie… everyone struggles desperately, giving their all to grow. Yet, the result is such an ending, an ending that leaves almost everyone in despair and heartbroken.

When I finished Volume Three, my emotions remained unsettled for a long time. I poured countless efforts and emotions into this volume, more than into any other writing I had ever done. Yet, at the end, I felt infinitely sad.

I can't help but ask myself, why did it have to end like this? Why did I have to end such a year of such forbearance, such bitterness, such tragic beauty, in such a cruel way?

Was Xu Lie suffering? He was extremely suffering.

When he finally managed to convince himself to forgive Galan's infidelity and wanted her back, he suddenly realized he was wrong, everything was wrong. The one who truly needed forgiveness was himself. This devastating news completely shattered him. He couldn't forgive himself, yet he needed Galan's forgiveness, because it was his only motivation to live. Xu Lie may have been foolish, selfish, and stubborn back then, but was the pain he endured any less than Galan's?

Whose unspeakable wound is whose? To quote Xu Lie from Volume Four: "Clearly...clearly you provoked me first, yet now, I'm left all alone in this quagmire. Lin Jialan, are you being fair to me? Are you being fair?!" Jialan has the right to happiness and the reason to complain, but Xu Lie seems to have lost even the chance to be forgiven and happy.

Xu Lie, isn't he suffering from this torment and hope every day?

Is Zimo suffering? He is suffering greatly.

His suffering stemmed from his deep-seated understanding and acceptance of Garan, from his overly wise mind and rationality. Therefore, no matter how much he loved Garan, even to the point of being willing to die for her, he could not express it.

Because it was he who told Lanlan that Yihan was a good man; it was also he who taught Lanlan how to grow, how to choose, and how to cherish the person in front of her. Therefore, his love was destined to be buried deep in his heart forever, without even a chance to fight for it.

Remember in Xiao Ran's dream, after Bing Yi exposed him, Luo Feng said, "Why can they all keep you by their side so domineeringly? Why can they openly want you, while I can only watch silently from the sidelines, even pushing you into someone else's arms!" Was Luo Feng's affection for Bing Yi as deep as Zi Mo's for Jia Lan? Clearly not. So, if even he couldn't bear such pain, how did Zi Mo manage to endure it?

So, do you think Zimo is suffering?

Is he suffering too much? He is suffering terribly.

The most indescribable aspect of this volume is Yi Han's suffering. His beloved is right beside him, yet he can only protect her as his master. His respected master, his cherished lover, and the heavy secret revealed that May... Sometimes I can't even imagine how he, burdened with so much pain, resentment, and curses, managed to endure that period with such a detached expression.

How much pain did he feel when Lin Yu broke down and hugged him, when Lin Yu begged for his embrace, when Lin Yu called his name in his sleep? How many times did he grit his teeth and endure this pain during those long two years? I can't even bear to think about it.

With great difficulty, he risked his life to break Shen Tu's curse; with great difficulty, they were finally together. Yi Han wished he could keep Lin Yu by his side every moment, protecting her from even the slightest harm. But fate is so cruel. Lin Yu died, right before his eyes, died because he was powerless to protect her and could not save her. I think I can no longer describe this despair and collapse.

He traded his life for love, and then used that love to protect Lin Yu for fifty years. But what was the result of all his hard work and sacrifice? He watched helplessly as the person he loved died before his eyes.

Garan had told him the truth that he came from another world, which might have been enough to keep him alive, but it could never erase the unforgettable pain and the despair of helplessness.

The wind is cold—the wind howls, the rain falls, we are worlds apart, though so close. Tears of the mortal world, the heavens are heartless, why did we go together but not return?

Isn't he suffering?

Is Lin Yu suffering? She has already tasted all the bitterness of life.

The story of the young prime minister is essentially the coming-of-age tale of an innocent girl. To be honest, the depth of the pain contained within this growth process was something I never imagined when I conceived the story.

I once firmly believed that *The Young Prime Minister* was a comedy. But now, I wonder, could it truly be a comedy? Can a coming-of-age story filled with constant choices, cruelty, sacrifices, and despair really be a pure comedy?

Therefore, I think I don't need to elaborate on Lin Yu's suffering, because the entire article has now reached over 400,000 words. Every word and every sentence here is made from her blood and tears.

She was like a puppet manipulated by fate, constantly getting hurt and fighting back. When she finally broke free from the curse, she found that she and those around her were already covered in wounds.

Lin Yu carries the burden of love and hatred from two worlds, bearing the torment of two souls being torn apart. Doesn't she suffer?

For over a month after I put down the third volume, I could barely write a single word. Sometimes I wondered if, while writing the third volume, I had truly poured all their suffering into my heart, and then become trapped in the poignant beauty and despair of that volume, unable to extricate myself, which is why I couldn't continue writing and couldn't fully grant them a happy future.

It has to be said, this is a volume that left everyone utterly exhausted. While it's the most satisfying, it's also the most devastating... ORZ!