La vida de la gente del campo en la ciudad durante la dinastía Song

Capítulo 119

I reached out, wanting to embrace his thin, almost transparent body, but stopped the moment my fingertips pierced his arm.

"Zimo..." I said, "Zimo... how are you doing?"

He smiled at me, a gentle and warm smile, as if all the burdens and pains of the past were gone, leaving only pure affection.

Then, everything went black before my eyes.

I opened my eyes and saw Zimo's face in the dim candlelight. My senses were overwhelmed by a deep sorrow and longing, but I knew I couldn't let him worry. I said, "Zimo, did you see? I did the last thing you suggested."

"I lured Yang Yi and Mu Shuangshuang into a carefully laid trap, and Feng Yin will be captured soon."

"Lin Yu?" Zi Mo frowned slightly, looking at me with a puzzled expression.

I blinked, dispelling the damp heat rising from my deep longing and guilt, and continued, "I can now live without you. I can navigate the court with ease, I can deploy troops on the battlefield, I have the ability to strategize, and I have the determination to achieve success at the cost of countless lives. Although some things cause me great pain, I can still endure them and pretend not to care."

"Zi Mo, you once said that if I could turn back into the real Lin Yu, perhaps you wouldn't be so worried." I offered what I thought was my gentlest and most natural smile. "Zi Mo, I don't need you to worry anymore, really." But...

But I still miss you so much! I want to see you again!

"Lin Yu, do you have a fever?" Zi Mo touched my forehead. "I'll go call your Wind Guard over."

"Zimo—!!" I cried out in alarm, grabbing his wrist tightly and choking out, "Don't go!"

I gripped that hand with all my might, repeating over and over, "Zimo, I'm sorry... I'm sorry... I lied to you. Being alone is really tiring, and having no one by your side is really lonely... Yihan and I, you told me to keep loving you, but now I don't know what to do. Saying I didn't need you to worry was all a lie. Zimo... I miss you so much... I miss you so much..."

The wounds in my heart and the pain in my chest surged up, and I drifted off to sleep again, continuing to dream other dreams. But my hand clung tightly to that wrist, like a drowning person grasping at a straw, afraid that if I let go, an overwhelming wave of loneliness would surge in.

I don't know how long I slept before I finally fully woke up. The pain in my body had completely disappeared, but I felt utterly exhausted and powerless. I pursed my cold, chapped lips and opened my eyes.

The room was empty, but when I looked down, I saw a head of shiny black hair, and I could imagine that his slightly chubby, handsome face was completely buried in his arms and the blankets.

Long, slender, fair fingers with well-proportioned joints gripped my right middle and ring fingers tightly in a stubborn and insecure manner. They must have been gripping for a long time, because there was a warm, damp feeling between their fingers.

I carefully tried to pull my hand away, but he suddenly tightened his grip and looked up. His bewildered eyes lit up the moment they met my gentle smile; his expression was one of almost bursting tears of joy. He held my two fingers tightly and called out, "Yu...Yu..."

I smiled helplessly and said in a hoarse voice, "Feifei, I'm very thirsty. Could you get me a glass of water?"

Feifei nodded hurriedly and rushed to the coffee table, only to find the kettle empty. He turned to look at me, and my superhuman eyesight allowed me to see my own haggard and pale reflection in his eyes, which explained his sorrowful expression.

The door creaked open, and a figure in blue, exuding a rare and precious coolness in the summer, walked in. He carried a complete tea set, skillfully brewed the tea on a table not far from me, and then handed it to Feifei.

Feifei quickly took the bowl and hurriedly brought it to me. The two tiny drops of water that spilled along the way made him look annoyed and heartbroken.

Under Feifei's careful care and Yihan's deep gaze, I slowly drank the tea at the perfect temperature, its fragrant aroma sliding down my parched and burning throat and into my stomach.

After drinking the tea, my voice finally stopped being hoarse, my expression returned to composure, and even my haggardness was no longer so obvious. I casually made up an excuse to send Feifei away and asked, "Yihan, did the plan go smoothly?" Actually, I was just asking; I trusted Yihan's hidden abilities.

Sure enough, he nodded and said, "Everything is proceeding according to your wishes, Young Master. Qin Gui sent word that Mu Shuangshuang has tacitly approved of your plan, Young Master, and I believe she will reply to you soon. Also..."

Yi Han paused, his slightly raised brow bone carrying a hint of coldness, his sword-like eyebrows furrowed, his expression unreadable, whether it was compromise or sorrow: "Yao'er said that Mu Shuangshuang has lost her qualification to be Shen Tu."

My heart sank. Despite the news being so beneficial to my plan, I couldn't feel happy: "What about her choice?"

Yi Han uttered a single word in an extremely cold voice: "Me."

I listened, stunned, wanting to laugh but unable to. I should have said in a cheerful tone, "Really?" That would have been a confirmation that Mu Shuangshuang would never betray me, which would have been great. But how could I say it? How could I possibly be happy?

I looked up and saw the despair hidden beneath Yi Han's cold expression, such obvious pain and resentment. I had rarely seen that on his face since that rainy day of the apocalypse.

My heart skipped a beat, and I tried to keep my voice steady as I asked, "Yihan, are you hiding something from me?"

"No!" Yi Han blurted out. His tone was urgent, but it didn't sound like a guilty excuse; rather, it sounded like an unwavering resolve. It was as if he was saying: even if something happens, he will handle it and will never cause me any more worry.

Now, I am independent and self-reliant, and I would never like this feeling of being kept in the dark and protected in an ivory tower. However, if it was Yihan who said these words and made this decision, then I can only willingly believe it.

For no other reason than that he was none other than... Feng Yihan!

I took a deep breath, shaking off those troubling and pointless thoughts, and rubbed my aching forehead as I got out of bed. Yi Han quickly came over to help me, putting on a light blue gauze coat for me.

As someone from the Lin Yu clan, I seem to have a strong preference for blue, and it suits me well. As I looked at the increasingly thin and frail yet still handsome figure of the young man reflected in the glass mirror, I suddenly asked, "How many days have I been asleep?"

Yi Han raised his eyelids slightly, his thin lips opening and closing in a small arc: "Three days."

"Ah—?" I exclaimed in surprise, "It's been three days already?" Doesn't that mean I'm already a day past the time I should have gone back? My brother and aunt will probably think I've fainted again!

I casually straightened my clothes and said, "Order the three armies to beat the war drums and attack Fangling City immediately."

Yi Han gave me a strange look: "Is the young master in a hurry?"

I curled my lip and said, "From tonight until tomorrow night, I'll probably be sleeping in bed. I'll leave the follow-up matters after taking Fangling City to you."

The surprise in Yi Han's eyes deepened, along with a hint of panic that I could barely detect. But his voice remained cold and indifferent: "Why...did you fall into a coma?"

I stretched and walked towards the door, saying as I passed him, "Because tomorrow night is Christmas Eve."

Of course, it's tomorrow night in that world. Tomorrow night, I will spend it with my loved ones who have always been by my side.

I turned back and smiled at him. Actually, I should be content that I can still see him every day, that he's still by my side. At least he's not like Zimo, whose soul has vanished without a trace. He makes even despair seem pale.

My smile softened into a peaceful contentment, melting his aloofness into tenderness. I said, "Yihan, Merry Christmas."

Then, he turned and walked out of the room.

Xiao Yi

2007.2.15 19:54

Chapter 9: Unforgettable Melancholy (End)