Emperatrices transmigradas (hombres y mujeres)

Capítulo 43

I gently released Xiaoxuan's hand. Xiaoxuan lowered her head, and I couldn't see her expression. I could only hear her soft voice, less cheerful and more gentle, "Take me home."

We walked on in silence.

"I've arrived." Xiao Xuan's voice seemed to drift from the horizon, faint and indistinct.

I watched Xiaoxuan go upstairs, and a moment later a pink light appeared upstairs. Was that her room? I silently walked back, and when I glanced back casually, a faint figure appeared under that pink light.

I returned home, silently collapsed onto my bed, and stared at the photograph on the opposite table. I didn't know what awaited me tonight. I only knew that I had to recover my lost memories, or I would never find peace in this life.

I lit a cigarette, exhaled smoke rings, and watched the wisps of smoke form circles, some enclosing others, and I couldn't tell which circle was enclosing which.

Xiao Xuan's image gradually appeared in the circle, a faint outline, light eyebrows, a faint smile. I blew away all the smoke rings with all my might.

Chen Yuan is my only good friend, and I don't want anything to change, I silently told myself.

I was in a daze, half asleep and half awake, when Xiaoxuan's voice floated in my ears.

"Chen Yuan said you were a womanizer, and it seems he was right. You lie without batting an eye."

I looked down at myself and could only see my protruding belly. I didn't know how I resembled a playboy.

Am I really a womanizer? I wondered hazily as I drifted off to sleep.

V. Sister Xu's words

A ray of sunlight stung my eyes. I opened them; it was already broad daylight. Surprisingly, I hadn't dreamed at all that night. I shook my head in bewilderment.

That's how things are in this world: when you want to avoid something, you can't, and when you want to find it, it's nowhere to be found.

The phone rang. I looked at the phone but didn't reach for it. Only Chen Yuan would make this call; I didn't know why...

He faced Chen Yuan in this manner.

The phone kept ringing stubbornly. I silently looked at myself in the photo, and the ringing finally stopped.

I think I should change my approach. I don't want to keep looking for answers through Xiaoxuan anymore. I've decided that I must talk to Sister Xu today.

I walked slowly alone on the street, with Sister Xu's figure flickering in front of me.

I watched as Sister Xu's figure turned into a secluded alley, and I hurried after her.

When I caught up with Sister Xu, I suddenly stopped and stared intently at her.

As I expected, Sister Xu screamed. I remained expressionless and silently watched her.

"Xiao...Xiao Wang..." Sister Xu's voice trembled slightly.

"Sister Xu, please do me a favor."

"How...how can I help?"

"I just want to know what disease I have."

"You really forgot everything?"

Yes. But I'd like to know.

The fear in Sister Xu's eyes suddenly lessened, and I saw a hint of sympathy in her eyes.

"It's better to forget. Why do you really need to know? You're doing fine now anyway."

"No, I must know. You must tell me, or I will follow you forever."

Sister Xu's gaze began to turn strange. "You really want to know?"

"yes."

"Do you still remember Xiao Huan?"

My thoughts started to get jumbled. "Xiao Huan? I don't remember."

"Xiao Huan is your girlfriend."

Before my eyes appeared a white dress, big eyes, two shallow dimples, and an ever-radiant smile...

"You and Chen Yuan were classmates in college, and you came to our company together after graduation. When you came to the company, Xiao Huan was already your girlfriend..."

"Three years ago, you and Xiao Huan were supposed to get married. But suddenly for a few days, none of the three of you came to work, and later only Chen Yuan returned to the company."

"People at the company say..." Sister Xu glanced at me furtively.

I had no expression; I just stared straight at Sister Xu.

Sister Xu bit her lip. "People at the company said you suddenly had a mental breakdown and killed Xiao Huan..."

My gaze was blank, and my mind was reeling...

“Not only did they kill Xiao Huan, but they also…” Sister Xu began to stammer.

"Speak." My voice was cold, as if it came from a distant horizon.

"I heard you even chopped Xiao Huan's body into many pieces, and even...ate...ate some of it..."

My stomach started to cramp.

"Did you make braised pork?" My voice remained completely steady.

"I heard it's...yes..." Sister Xu didn't dare to look at me anymore.

"Later I heard that because you were mentally ill, the court couldn't sentence you, so the police sent you to a mental hospital."

I mechanically started to walk, and the scenery on both sides began to recede. I didn't know where I was going, and everything around me was no longer relevant to me.

I forgot whether Sister Xu left first or I left first; all I know is that the scenery around me changed again and again.

Even though it was late, my eyesight remained sharp; through the darkness of the twilight, I could see the expressions on everyone's faces.

The surrounding scenery gradually became familiar, and I stopped in front of a building. I knew this was Xiao Huan's old home. But I couldn't remember if I had killed Xiao Huan here, and...

I suddenly vomited, and cloudy vomit flowed down my chin. I felt nothing in my body, but my senses were unusually clear.

Though we will never see each other again, I will always be by your side. The words I spoke will never change, and we will never be apart...

A white dress fluttered towards me, the hem billowing in the wind, gently rolling up. Long, flowing hair, large eyes, and two shallow dimples bloomed in her radiant smile.

No, I would never kill Xiao Huan, I know that.

VI. Unexpected Love

I slowly moved my feet and walked towards the street. I don't know how long I walked, but when I looked up, I saw my own building.

Stepping out of the elevator, the public corridor was pitch black. I didn't know if the lights were broken or there was a power outage, but it didn't matter to me anymore.

Suddenly, a white figure caught my eye. In front of my house, a white figure moved through the darkness.

A faint halo of light, a sliver of moonlight shining through some crack, shone on a white dress.

A sweet feeling suddenly welled up inside me, a feeling that seemed familiar.

I walked over slowly, without the slightest fear in my heart, as if I were now fearless.

"Xiao Ming." A melodious female voice rang out gently, but I suddenly felt a sense of loss.

It's Xiaoxuan.

I don't know why I feel disappointed. What was I hoping for? Am I waiting for Xiao Huan? Will she ever appear by my side again?

I opened the door without saying a word, and Xiao Xuan floated into the room silently, as if she were a ghost.

I tried pressing the light switch, but nothing happened; the room remained dark. Only the moonlight from outside the window shone on the floor, reflecting dappled silver light.

Xiaoxuan silently hugged my waist from behind, and I wrapped my arms around her in return. It all felt so natural, as if we had done it a thousand times before and knew each other inside and out.

The black space seemed to give us boundless power. We felt no fear, no guilt, no self-blame; only endless tenderness and affection.

As dawn broke, I woke up from my sleep. A faint fragrance lingered on my pillow, a fragrance I knew all too well. A few strands of soft, long hair remained on the blanket.

I heard the clattering of pots and pans coming from the kitchen, and it all felt strangely familiar.

I know that Xiao Huan did all of this for me before.

I also know that I love Xiao Huan, I would never kill Xiao Huan, and I would never have done any of this.

So who was it? Who harmed Xiao Huan? And who made me inexplicably develop a mental illness?

Is my mental illness real or fake? If it's fake, then how come I've forgotten everything?

I don't know how to explain all of this, but I do know one thing clearly. If there's anyone in this world who can give me the answer, it can only be Chen Yuan.

Yes, it was Chen Yuan. Chen Yuan knew everything about me and Xiao Huan; he was aware of our every move. During the days Xiao Huan and I were missing, he didn't go to the company either. Only after Xiao Huan died and I was admitted to the mental hospital did he mysteriously reappear and return to work.

He is the most likely person to know the answers to all of these questions.

A gentle hand touched my forehead. "Xiaoming, let's eat." Xiaoxuan came to my side quietly.

I got dressed and got out of bed, only to find that the photo was gone.

Xiao Xuan noticed my gaze was fixed on the opposite table and lowered her head.

"I don't want to see you with other women, not even in photos." Xiaoxuan's voice was still gentle, but her eyes were red.

I gently stroked Xiaoxuan's hair, "From now on, you'll be the only one in my heart."

"Really?" Xiaoxuan's childlike smile couldn't hide the excited blush on her cheeks.

I suddenly felt a little touched. Yes, Xiao Huan is long gone, but Xiao Xuan in front of me is the one who loves me now.

I stopped thinking about Chen Yuan. I knew that although I had wronged Chen Yuan, he probably never truly won Xiao Xuan's heart.

Even without me, Xiaoxuan would not love Chen Yuan.

The phone rang, and I answered it without hesitation.

"Xiaoming, where did you go yesterday? I've been looking for you all day." Chen Yuan's voice was a little impatient.

I know that he was anxious not only because he couldn't find me, but also because he couldn't find Xiaoxuan.

“I went out for a walk and saw an old friend.”

"Old friend? Who did you see?" Chen Yuan asked anxiously.

"I saw Sister Xu."

"What did she say to you? Don't believe her nonsense." Chen Yuan's voice became even more urgent.

"She didn't say anything, just chatted casually," I said slowly.

"Wait for me at home, I'll pick you up and we can talk."