Kapitel 20

The stars in the sky are countless, and we desire more than the stars themselves; how can everything ever be as we wish? Next time,

Don't be disappointed when you try hard to get someone or something and don't get it. Those disappointing moments in life...

There are as many as the stars in the sky.

Some say stars are the eyes of the dead shining in the sky; I prefer to believe they are lost love, unforgettable lovers, every smile and disappointment, the intimate lovemaking between lovers. A friend of mine draws a star in her diary every day after sleeping with her boyfriend. A rough farewell.

When we're in love, we're always afraid of breaking up someday. We imagine the breakup scenario and then cry sadly. However, the breakup we imagine is often beautiful:

We will embrace and weep.

We will wish each other well.

We encourage each other. He'll say, "I'm not here for you, so you need to learn to take care of yourself." She'll say, "Even without me around, you need to work hard."

We will say goodbye with reluctance, perhaps for one last time, and then remember the tenderness of this last night for the rest of our lives.

We will have a deep, long kiss, and she will always remember the warmth of his tongue.

When saying goodbye, she would say, "I will never forget you in my entire life." He would say, "You are still the person I care about most. Whenever you need me, I will come to your side immediately."

However, farewells in reality are often crude. He was perfectly fine yesterday, but today he says he's fallen in love with someone else. You won't wish each other well; that would be too hypocritical. You won't embrace and weep, because only you are crying. You won't encourage each other; you want him dead. Your last night of intimacy was terribly awful. There wasn't even a deep, long kiss; his tongue was cold. Your way of saying goodbye is either him leaving without a word, or you quietly moving your things out of his house.

Love is always more beautiful in imagination than in reality; this is true both in meeting and in parting. (A stray dog in longing.)

That night, after breaking up with her boyfriend, she ran out of his house and saw a stray dog huddled under an overpass. It was soaking wet and looked pitiful. She took it home. From then on, she and the dog lived together.

In the absence of a man, she poured all her love into her dog. It was her only companion. Fortunately, she had it, otherwise she would have felt so lonely. She had just stepped out of her boyfriend's house when she encountered it, and she firmly believed it was fate.

She took excellent care of the dog. The dog grew up healthy, with a shiny coat, and was lively and playful. Every friend said her dog was adorable, and no one believed it had ever been a stray.

But she herself didn't gain weight. After breaking up with her boyfriend, she lost a full twelve pounds. That night, she looked in the mirror with her dog; the dog was getting fatter, while she was getting thinner. Why was this happening?

Suddenly, she understood.

Dogs don't get thin because they don't miss anyone.

A person loses weight because they miss someone.

It's been over a year since she left that man, but she still hasn't forgotten him. She thinks about the past while sleeping, showering, and eating. She thought she could stop thinking about him, but she can't. She left his house, but she hasn't escaped his shadow.

People are always tormented by longing, becoming like pitiful stray dogs in their yearning. Please don't give up on me too soon.

"Please give me a few more months, don't give up on me too quickly."

Hearing this, you might think it's a junior employee pleading with their boss not to fire them, or an athlete begging their coach. You'd be wrong. This is a woman pleading with her boyfriend.

He broke up with her, saying they weren't compatible. She begged him not to give up on her yet, but he still gave up on her.

She struggled through those difficult times, and many years later, she lived a peaceful life with another man. One day, she said, "Although we broke up back then, I know he will miss me for the rest of his life."

What evidence does she have that the man will miss her for the rest of his life?

That's the foolish and naive narcissism that you and I both have.

We always assume we hold a place in our ex's memories. Even if the relationship was short-lived or unpleasant, or if the person treated us badly, years later, we still believe we held a special place in their life.

We may not miss him, but he will definitely miss me sometimes, and with some regret.

We can be ruthless enough to give up a lover, but what we can never be ruthless enough to give up is self-praise.

⚙️
Lesestil

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