Un joven errante

Capítulo 37

Last year's flowers did not grow old;

The moon is full again this year.

With flowers and moon,

A lifetime of dreams ends in sorrow and worry.

Unable to conceal the sorrow of parting,

Alone in despair. "

She sang with such passion, and I listened with such passion. Her voice was like Faye Wong's, a serene and heavenly sound, or like a rushing torrent in a canyon, melodious and clear.

Singing such a sorrowful and poignant melody, writing such lyrics that subtly express deep-seated grief, what loneliness and sorrow truly lie hidden in her heart? Her expression differed from her usual mocking demeanor; her gaze was sad, tinged with a faint melancholy, like a sorrowful purple lily under the moonlight—evoking pity and touching the heart.

It's hard to hide the sadness of Li Yan's separation, and she becomes miserable alone.

Volume 2, Chapter 67: Recognizing a Son

“Yes, this is what the master ordered: find out who caused the trouble, and once the master gives the order, then—” The old man’s voice was low and heavy.

“Uncle Fu, tell the master that no one can escape,” the silver-haired, masked man said emotionlessly.

"Yes," the old man nodded with satisfaction, "Our master has ensured our safety for life, and we should repay him with all our might. You must take good care of the Assassin's Den. Don't let Uncle Fu down."

The man said in a low voice, "I know."

"Sigh," the old man sighed, feeling a pang of heartache at his adopted son's indifference. He patted his shoulder, turned, and left. He had been away for a long time; there were still many things to do in the village, and it was time for him to return.

The silver-haired man watched the old man leave with gentle eyes before turning around, clapping his hands, and saying, "Black Hawk, you and Leopard will be in charge of this matter. I need results as quickly as possible."

A burly, dark-skinned man who had entered and was kneeling on the ground respectfully said, "Black Eagle obeys. I will carry it out immediately."

"Notify Diao Hu and Jiao Hu, who are preparing for the grand martial arts event, that I have some instructions. Go now."

"Yes, OP."

Sitting in the soft chair, she suddenly recalled that a few years ago, the owner, whom she had never met, had abruptly demanded a change in the entire organization and style of operation of the building. No causing trouble in the martial arts world, no indiscriminate killing of the innocent, no unjust acts, no disobeying orders—moreover, Yi Zhu killed corrupt officials, robbed ill-gotten gains, rescued upright people, fulfilled the needs of the common people, cleansed the scum of the martial arts world, established the integrity of the martial arts world, and protected those she cared about.

A once infamous organization in the martial arts world, notorious for its money-for-hire killings, gradually transformed into a legendary, righteous organization, establishing the best and most outstanding security system to protect the places designated by their master. They carried out their master's orders. Years ago, he had been saved by Uncle Fu, and after Uncle Fu left Yizhu, he became the head of the sect. Uncle Fu, under the master's arrangement, became the steward and could finally rest. This once-powerful figure in the martial arts world willingly retired for his master, filled with gratitude. Although he had never met the legendary master, he still felt admiration and a strange sense of reverence.

What kind of person is he, really?

In the stillness of the night, the best thing for me to do is to focus on my work. Junjin's business is growing, and the demand for clothing is increasing, especially for novel styles. Because Junjin's principle is to incorporate more or less modern elements into the current trends, I can't leave this most important aspect—design—to anyone else, not even our original go-to designers. Their designs are all characteristic of the times and lack innovation. So every new style has to go through me. Although it's hard work, seeing Junjin grow and thrive makes it all worthwhile.

"Hey, woman!" I was engrossed in drawing when someone suddenly appeared from behind me.

"Ah?!" I screamed in fright, my pen slipped, and my drawing was ruined. All my hard work from the whole night! Who the hell did that?!

I glared at the culprit with my bloodshot eyes from staying up all night: "Damn brat!" I reached out my claws and pinched his soft little cheeks without any politeness, pulling until his pink face was deformed and tears welled up in his eyes from the pain.

Once I had vented my anger, I released him with satisfaction. Strangely, he didn't struggle this time.

The little brat rubbed his cheek, which I had pinched until it was red, looking at me with teary eyes. After a long while, he finally asked, "Are you done being angry?"

Seeing his childlike appearance, my heart softened. I pulled him into my arms, gently blew on his skin, and asked guiltily, "How are you? Does it still hurt?"

He shook his head in my arms, "It doesn't hurt anymore." As he said this, he actually chuckled softly.

“Hey, kid,” I asked rudely, “what are you laughing at?”

He didn't say anything, but just snuggled into my arms and sighed contentedly, "So soft, like a mother's embrace."

My heart ached, and I murmured, "Why speak in such a formal, literary way?"

"Oh, woman," he pleaded softly, "would you be my mother?"

Mother?! My first instinct was to say no. I'm still young, what would I do with such a big child? But when I saw him look up at me with such longing, my heart softened.

I asked, puzzled, "Don't you have a mother?"

His eyes dimmed: "She has never held me or kissed me since I was born. After I was made crown prince, she was even afraid of me, hiding in the palace and refusing to see me or anyone else. She was just a timid and cowardly person. I suffered all kinds of bullying and was even poisoned from a young age, but she turned a blind eye and only cared about protecting herself. To me, she was nothing but a stranger." His tone was somewhat weary, and although he spoke softly, there was endless sorrow in his voice.

"Poor child," I hugged him again, an endless maternal love welling up from nowhere, a true overflow of maternal instinct.

"Please promise me? I just want you to be my mother." He looked at me pleadingly.

I really couldn't bear to disappoint him, so I reluctantly said, "Alright then."

Upon hearing this, he broke free from my embrace and jumped up excitedly. After a while, he stood in front of me, bowed respectfully, and said solemnly, "Mother."

Looking at him, I was dumbfounded. It really was a son I'd picked up. But, Mother? How strange.

"Stop, stop, stop," I interrupted him, correcting him, "I can be your mother, but you can't call me Mother anymore, it makes me sound too old. How about you just call me Mom?"

"Mom?!" He tilted his head in confusion and asked, "What does that mean?"

I patted his head affectionately: "It means mother."

He hugged me again, murmuring, "Mom, Mom..." over and over again. He never tired of it.

I took a piece of leftover cake from the kitchen and handed it to him. He happily took it and said while eating, "I really want to eat Mom's cooking every day. Hehe."

Looking at his innocent face, I felt a sense of relief. It pained me to see him, at such a young age, having to act like a little adult in front of those women, trying to protect himself. What was his mother, Consort Li, thinking, letting her child struggle in such treacherous waters every day, yet heartlessly turning a blind eye? How much more humanity must be extinguished in the palace?

"Eat slowly." I didn't even realize the tenderness I was feeling when I looked at him.

I assured him, "No matter what happens in the future, I will protect you and never abandon you."

His mouth was stuffed with cake, yet he looked up at me blankly, tears welling in his eyes. After a long while, he wiped away his tears, lowered his head again to eat his cake, and said with a slight smile, "Mmm." No one had ever said this to him before. Never. They were all his father's concubines, but they only thought about how to kill him; no one had ever cared about him. He thought he would never meet anyone like that in his life. But—fate smiled upon him, and he did.

"By the way, why did you come here all by yourself?"

He exclaimed in surprise, remembering that he had sneaked out because he wanted to see her, so much so. If the palace maids and eunuchs found out, there would be chaos in the palace.

He hurriedly put down the plate, and as he walked away in a flurry, he said, "Mom, I'll come see you again." Then he flashed a big smile and rushed off.

Looking at his genuinely adorable appearance, I stood there and couldn't help but smile.

This kid. Hehe.

Su Da stood in the shadows outside the door, staring blankly at that warm, maternal smile. Why? How could she do that? She knew the boy; he was Consort Li's child, the current Crown Prince, and every woman in the palace hated him. Even she herself had disliked that arrogant, domineering child. But how could she make him willingly remove his mask, like any innocent child, laughing and joking with his mother?

Why? She was so special. Suda couldn't understand.

Watching the oblivious woman return to her desk and continue drawing with a smile, Su Da gazed at the gentle woman under the lamp, her eyes soft and tender, and felt endless astonishment and doubt. Who exactly was this mysterious woman?

After falling out of favor and being banished to the cold palace by the emperor, she not only did not become depressed or despondent, but she was still able to manage her life well and take care of these mad and insane women without complaint. Moreover, she was able to secretly bring so many things into the palace. It is truly astonishing, puzzling, and admirable.

Volume 2, Chapter 68: The Fall of the Dawn Moon (Part 1)

A few days after I instructed Xiao Quanzi to deliver a message to the old man, he appeared before me, looking travel-worn, as I lazily lay on my recliner, preparing for a short rest. I opened my eyes and saw him standing there, still expressionless, his face still breathtakingly beautiful, like a divine being.

He smiled at me, his face looking somewhat haggard, but his charm was still undeniable. He asked me casually, "Is there something you need that you called me here in such a hurry?"

I never hide anything from him, so I don't want to beat around the bush: "I need your help with the matter of the pearl."

"A pearl?" He frowned slightly. "What is your relationship with it?"

"I will tell you about this later, but you should see what Yi Zhu has done all these years. Old man, with your status in the martial arts world, your words are like Mount Tai and the Big Dipper, and no one dares to doubt them. Otherwise, you would be unworthy of the name 'Demon Child'." I couldn't help but chuckle as I said this.

He smiled faintly: "What do you want me to do?"

I looked at him with some emotion. He was still the same. No matter what I asked for, he would unconditionally fulfill it and do it for me.

I began, "At the grand martial arts gathering held at Jianxian Manor, I need your help to clear up and change the impression that Yizhu Pearl has on the martial arts world." Seeing that he remained silent, I continued, "I know this is not easy, but I hope you will be by my side."

He was slightly surprised: "You mean, you want to participate in this year's grand martial arts event?"

I nodded and said firmly, "Yes."

He gently stroked my hair and said softly, "Girl, you know your master doesn't want you to get involved in too much trouble."

I rested my head on his shoulder and murmured, "I know. You've always been the one taking good care of me, protecting me, and helping me. Believe me, all I want now is to have peace in this world and be able to live peacefully with you all."

“Alas,” he sighed softly, “no matter what you do, your master will help you.”

I said in a spoiled tone, "I knew Master was the best to me."

“By the way,” I looked up at him, “Xiao Bai really misses Prajna Valley. Why don’t we take advantage of my trip to the martial arts extravaganza and visit your ten old friends? What do you say?”

He smiled softly and gently: "Whatever you say."

I knew he was the best person for me in this world. Looking at his radiant face, I couldn't help but gently kiss his soft lips.

He continued to watch my capricious behavior with a smile, neither scolding nor panicking. He remained completely calm and composed. I was somewhat annoyed, but I couldn't lash out. He really had no sense of romance at all.

Dear friends, I've been busy these past few days, so I'm making up for it all today.

Volume 2, Chapter 69: The Falling Moon (Part 2)

During our time at Luoshuang Palace, Su Da and I began to read. The books were all borrowed from Li Jiu by my newly adopted son. One of us loved reading poetry and prose, while the other enjoyed reading historical records. One of us loved watching the gentle breeze, white clouds, stars, and moon in the sky, while the other would smile and watch all the ladies of Luoshuang Palace act silly and adorable during the day, taking good care of them, and then quietly go about her work at night.

What should have been a dull and monotonous life turned out to be incredibly vibrant. What's more, with a child in his teens as a companion, every day was filled with laughter and joy. Here, there was none of the human drama and social niceties of the outside world, none of the constant infighting and backstabbing, the endless squabbles and power struggles. No more comparing extravagance, no more vying for favor.

Su Daqin and I danced in harmony, admiring the falling blossoms, watching the rosy clouds drift by, the moon shining brightly, and the breeze gentle. How carefree and joyful we were!

I started recording my daily life and feelings in my diary, bit by bit.

Time flies, and several months have passed in the blink of an eye. Tender green lotus leaves have begun to sprout in the Moon Reflection Lake in front of the courtyard, and new buds of flower seedlings have begun to break through the soil in the garden. New life has quietly arrived, while the years that were left behind have begun to wither away, never to be found again.

The old man left the day after he arrived. He was preparing for the grand martial arts event, where heroes from all over the world would gather at Jianxian Manor. I wonder if this time he was discussing how to deal with Yizhuozhu, the once infamous number one assassin in the martial arts world.

Several years ago, Yi Zhu was pursued by so-called righteous people in the martial arts world, which severely damaged his vitality and almost prevented him from recovering.

I should get ready to set off.

Before I leave, I need to see someone. I don't know why, but ever since I heard Su Da's casual remark, my heart has felt heavy and painful. But if he loves me, why can't he love everyone, whether it's An Jin or Xie Weiying? Perhaps he only loves the illusion of An Jin, and has never loved the real me. Otherwise, he wouldn't have hurt me, the Xie Weiying, so badly. I lack confidence, I lack the confidence that after I tell him I am An Jin, we can still go back to how things were before. I don't have that confidence. Maybe I'm cowardly, maybe I'm a coward, but I really don't have that confidence. We can never go back to the way things were. It's been like that night. He tore apart my last shred of self-respect and confidence.

As always, I donned my white night clothes. I scaled walls and rooftops, arriving at that familiar wall, where I curled up in its shadow to conceal myself. For countless days, I sat there, watching from afar as he summoned concubines to his bedchamber each day, indulging in pleasure with beauties, amidst song and dance, the sounds of music never ceasing. A dull ache gnawed at my heart, slowly devouring my soul, tormenting my soul. But I could only watch the palace, brightly lit every night, filled with laughter and merriment, and sigh softly. Then, at dawn, I would quietly depart.

However, because of my actions, a considerable rumor spread within the palace. I looked at my attire with annoyance; I didn't look like a female ghost at all. I spent my days flying around the palace in white robes, and the patrolling guards would often see a white shadow flitting by, though they couldn't make out its face or figure. Adding to this, some palace maids and eunuchs who got up to use the restroom in the middle of the night unfortunately saw it too. If you were feeling dizzy and suddenly saw a white shadow moving like a gust of wind from the direction of the Cold Palace, your nerves would definitely be on edge, and you would think you'd encountered a ghost. And this was supposed to be a disheveled, unjustly killed female ghost, someone who had suffered injustice in life. The current rumor was that she was a woman who had been falsely accused by a concubine, banished to the Cold Palace, and died unjustly, now seeking revenge. I thought it was different; she had been dead for so many years, if she wanted to become a ghost, she would have become one long ago; if she wanted revenge, she would have sought revenge long ago. Why wait so many years?

How could someone as lovable, petite, adorable, intelligent, and tender as me… (omitting thousands of words) be mistaken for a female ghost? I simply can't understand it; even if I had ten more heads, I still wouldn't get it.

From a distance, Li Jiu scoffed, "Try seeing a disheveled woman in white floating through the air in the middle of the night. I bet you'd run faster than anyone and scream more terrified than anyone else..."

Alas, I am truly like someone lost in a fog, my pavilion obscured by the moonlight, my Peach Blossom Spring nowhere to be found. How pitiful.

Something's strange today. I sat on the wall for ages, but there was still no movement from inside the main hall. From my vantage point, I could see everything inside. Suddenly, Sima Rui, who had been standing quietly in the middle of the hall, flew into a rage, his face turning ashen. He smashed everything around him to the ground, even driving out several eunuchs who had gone in to serve him. Gao Lu wasn't spared either. In the end, the entire hall was empty except for him. There were many wine jars beside him, brought in by the group of eunuchs who had come in earlier. He sat there drinking, clearly an alcoholic.

I sat there, high up, watching him drink until his face was flushed, until he collapsed and fell asleep, probably unconscious. Beside him were a dozen or so jars; I knew they were plum wine, the kind he used to take out for me to drink. Back then, there was also Sister Danyi. But now—

He's drinking alone in there, while I'm here alone in the cold wind.

They were so close, yet felt worlds apart. Unreachable, ungraspable.

But he's so drunk, lying on that cold ground. What if he catches a cold? What if he gets chilled? What happened to make him so upset and so reckless? If I could help, I wish I could be there for him right now. Seeing this side of him that no one else knows, I can't hide my heartache.