Therefore, I feel it's absolutely necessary to give them an introductory class before they come into contact with modern people, including self-introduction and a daily encyclopedia of "100,000 Whys". The best candidate for teacher would have been Li Shishi, but it seems she's too busy now, so I need to find another introductory teacher. This person must first have already worked for me for a while and be familiar with modern life—suddenly I understand why employers at job fairs require three to five years of work experience! Then, this person must be knowledgeable about history, ideally a client from the Ming or Qing dynasties onwards. Like Fatty Ying, he meets the first criterion. But expecting him to cram history from the Qin Dynasty onwards and become familiar with famous figures from each dynasty is obviously unrealistic. Besides, if he were to learn history, his first lesson would have to be about how Liu Bang seized power, which seems detrimental to the unity of the group of five. He can coexist peacefully with Jing Ke because, fundamentally, he wronged Ersha, and besides, that's a personal grudge; it's a different story when it comes to the nation and the world. Oh right, Xiang Yu also dug up the fat man's childless grave. With almost half the time already gone, we can't afford any more complications.
While I was lost in thought, the usually silent and composed Bian Que started pressing the light switch repeatedly, staring blankly at the ceiling like a idiot. This wasn't surprising; after all, Doctor Bian lived over 2400 years ago. If we were to travel back in time, who knows what kind of fool we'd be?
Wang Xizhi, on the other hand, developed an extremely keen interest in the tap water. He turned on the water, took out his brush from his robes, and was about to wash it when he suddenly asked me solemnly, "Won't the water I use to wash my brush flow downstairs?"
Without thinking for a moment, I nodded. Wang Xizhi immediately put away his brush and said, "Then we can't wash it. What if the people downstairs want to drink it?"
Tsk tsk, that's why their handwriting is so good, their moral character is so solid! Those of you who spat downstairs, aren't you ashamed? — I certainly was.
I quickly explained to him that although the water had flowed down, it went through a different pipe and it wouldn't cause any problems. Only then did Wang Xizhi take out his brush again and continue washing it, saying as he did so, "Now I don't need to wash it in the pond anymore. You don't know, I've been washing my brushes in that pond for years, and the frogs that crawl out of it are all black, and they even write seal script on their four legs..."
Everyone: "..." Wang Xizhi's brush-washing pool, that seems to be a very elegant thing.
Liu Gongquan looked around and pointed to the words "Men and Women" on the toilet sign, saying, "These characters are too ugly. It's not pleasant to use the toilet with such ugly characters in front of me. Shall I change them for you?"
Before I could speak, Wu Daozi asked me, "Is this the large private school you run?"
I could only nod. Wu Daozi scoffed, "There's no academic atmosphere at all. And what are those kids doing wandering around on the grass instead of studying?"
I was speechless as I watched a group of students practicing Song Dynasty military boxing. In the end, all I could say was, "We are a school that combines literature and martial arts..."
"Is that so? A school that combines literature and martial arts, with literature coming first and martial arts coming second. Studying well is the most important thing."
See, a conflict has arisen, hasn't it? Luckily, only the kind-hearted Xu Delong is present. If Li Kui and Hu Sanniang were to hear this, wouldn't a fight break out?
Wu Daozi continued, "How about this, do you have a main hall here? I'll paint a few roofs for you first, because your place is really too plain."
Yan Liben said, "I'll paint the Seventy-Two Sages of Confucius on the wall for you."
I said, trembling with fear, "The two largest spaces I have here are the lecture hall and the auditorium—actually, it's the small auditorium. I don't know if they meet your standards. Besides, do you even have the time?"
Yan Liben and Wu Daozi nodded in unison: "Yes."
Now I'm curious. They wouldn't even paint a school flag for me earlier, but now they have the time. I asked, "What are your plans for the next few days?"
Yan Liben glanced at Wu Daozi and the others, and spoke as their representative: "The more you delve into calligraphy and painting, the more profound it becomes—of course, the same goes for medicine. Even in our past lives, we still have some questions we haven't figured out. Although we can't accomplish much in a year, we can't let go of these things. Take painting, for example; a new place brings new feelings. Right now, all I want to do is paint. If I can produce one satisfactory painting this year, then this trip won't have been in vain." The others nodded in agreement.
I understand. Artists are like that; their most satisfying work is always the next one. It seems these artists all come to me with that mindset to continue creating. Even the two legendary doctors are the same. Medicine advances so much faster; back then, they hadn't even figured out the "Eighteen Incompatibilities and Nineteen Antagonisms," and now? Human cloning is almost a success.
我脱口说：“对几位的要求，我一定大力支持……”刚说了半句，我忽然意识到：文人其实比武将还麻烦。武将来了只要不出人命，打完一场就算。而王吴阎柳这四位的墨宝一旦流传出去，只要是稍入门道的业余爱好者一看那就得引起大混乱，中国书画玩得好的人不计其数，可这四大家那绝对是独树一帜。说个很简单的例子，包子人人会蒸，为什么就人家狗不理长盛不衰？我记得刚认识包子那会儿我突发奇想：既然人们都爱吃馅，我为什么不能发明一种光有馅没有皮的食品？到时候肯定火。包子这个傻妞第二天就把我的绝妙创意跟她们经理说了，气得我差点揍她，我还指着这个想法发家致富呢。后来包子跟我转述了她们经理的评语我才作罢，她们经理说这种东西有：丸子。
I said seriously to the masters present, "Gentlemen, it's one thing for you to create art in school. But you must be careful to keep the paper you've used and the paintings you've made safe, and never let them be distributed."
The group asked together, "Why?"
"The works of these authors are truly invaluable; there are only a handful of national museums in the world that possess them. If they were to leak out, causing chaos and damage to the novels, it could potentially trigger a war."
Wang Xizhi asked in surprise, "Very valuable?"
"How can you say it's valuable? It's extremely valuable!"
Wu Daozi couldn't help but ask, "How much is it worth?" It seems even a great master has vanity.
“Let me put it this way,” I pointed out the window, “See this school of mine? It’s already spent over a billion dollars. You can earn that back with just a few scribbles on a piece of scrap paper.”
The four old men looked pleased with themselves. Wu Daozi asked, "Then it won't be a problem for us to paint murals at the school, will it?"
I said, "It shouldn't be a problem." What if it is a problem? They've come all this way, you can't just not let them take their pens, can you? I suddenly realized that I still quite like Lin Daiyu; no matter how much she writes, she burns it all before she leaves.
Looking out the window at the endless construction site, Liu Gongquan sighed, "The workload is considerable."
I said, "You just need to focus on writing the inscriptions for the big places; you don't need to worry about anything else."
Bian Que suddenly said, "It seems that Brother Hua and I are of no help."
Oh no! I was so busy talking about calligraphy and painting that I neglected the two amazing doctors. I was waiting for them to decipher the Coca-Cola formula for me. I quickly said, "You two are also remarkable. Now, almost every hospital in our country has your portraits."
Hua Tuo asked with a smile, "Does it look like the painting?"
I shook my head with a forced smile. The statues of Hua Tuo, Bian Que, Zhang Zhongjing, and even Confucius in the hospital are basically just old men with different hairstyles.
Yan Liben said, "When I have time, I will personally paint for the two of them, and then send them to hang up after I finish."
Bian Que said, "We are not here for fame or fortune. Just prepare a room for us and I will first research the decoction to treat leprosy."
"...It has been figured out."
"Ah?" Bian Que was both surprised and delighted, and stretched out his hand, saying, "Give me the prescription!"
"Well... I don't have that either. You have to understand, the only medical common sense I know is that you should go to the hospital if you're sick."
Bian Que's long-cherished goal was gone, and after the initial joy, he felt a little lost. I quickly said, "It's alright, AIDS and cancer are still waiting for you to conquer. Winning a Nobel Prize in Medicine won't be a problem then."
"AIDS, cancer?" Perhaps due to his profession, Bian Que became excited upon hearing the names of these two medical nemesiss. "Bring me all the existing medical books!" It seems Bian Que realized he was somewhat out of touch with the times. In the more than 2,000 years since him, medicine has made significant progress. In fact, in terms of theoretical knowledge alone, Bian Que might not even be as knowledgeable as a student in an ordinary traditional Chinese medicine class. But his foundation is still there, and I believe he will quickly catch up after learning to read simplified Chinese characters. However, can these two diseases be cured with traditional Chinese medicine?
After saying goodbye to the six leaders, I saw two workers on campus unloading a bunch of signs, some long, some short, all very elegantly made. I asked them, "What are these for?"
One worker said, "These are for planting on the lawn, and some are for toilet signs in the new building."
I said, "Why is there only a sign? Where are the words on it?"
The worker said, "The lettering hasn't been decided yet. Once the new campus is built, some of the signs will be used as road signs based on the name."
I nodded: "Give me everything you need for the toilet." After thinking for a moment, I took a few more with long handles, and then carried a bucket of black paint from the construction site to find Qin Hui.
Since Qin Hui arrived at the school, he's been incredibly idle. The huge dormitory building is deserted except for him, as it's not officially in use yet and there's no television. Xu Delong, though he never comes here, doesn't dare go out for a stroll either. Bored, he saw me coming to see him and, thinking something good had happened, hurriedly climbed out of bed.
I piled the sign and paint bucket at his feet and shoved a calligraphy brush into his hand: "You should also do something for the school by writing a couple of characters."