Once I got involved, I realized how fascinating the world of idiots truly was. Everyone in the battle were illusory red shadows, and the most exhilarating thing was that their initial actions and thoughts could be reflected in these shadows. For example, if Qin Wuyang threw a punch at me, even though he was still standing there, a virtual shadow would already be throwing a punch. If his next move was a kick, then immediately following the first shadow would be a second shadow that would kick, though this second shadow would be a lighter shade of color than the first. And so on, a third, a fourth, a fifth… Just Qin Wuyang alone had more than a dozen shadows piled up on top of each other. I calmly dodged his punch, moved aside to avoid his kick, and finally crouched down to dodge his arm grab. The shadows disappeared one by one, only to reappear one after another. I could always know how he was going to torment me half an hour later. Beating someone like that… was easier than eating an ice pop.
Chapter 102 The Death of Jing Ke
Besides being able to anticipate the enemy's moves, the biggest benefit of Zhao Shazi's biscuits was that they allowed him to distinguish friend from foe. I could clearly judge the mental state of Er Sha and Fatty from the killing intent emanating from them. If Er Sha's killing intent suddenly intensified, it meant he was becoming confused, and I had to be extra careful with him. I swung my small bag to deflect a sword thrust at Fatty and then swatted away Fatty's sneak attack. Fatty was so focused on his ambush that Qin Wuyang's hands were almost grabbing his shoulders, so I quickly kicked Qin Wuyang in the hip...
This was terrible! All three of them flew into a rage and charged at me simultaneously. I felt a chilling aura, and saw countless lines, some dark and some light, emanating from their bodies, overlapping and rushing towards me. I could only sigh and dodge them one by one like Neo from The Matrix—except I couldn't manage the iron bridge move; although I have two good kidneys, my back can't handle it.
After fighting for a while, I discovered that the benefits of eating the "idiot's biscuit" were: as long as you were careful, not to mention three people, even three hundred or three thousand people couldn't do anything to you. You could sense the opponent's murderous intent beforehand; the red shadows appearing on them were clearly distinguishable in color, even clearer than if you had marked Figure 1 or Figure 2. You could just move to a different spot according to this diagram. Perhaps some people have questions: what if you encounter a master? It's the same when you encounter a master. They might contain a dozen or even dozens of variations in a single move, but it's useless. Those red shadows will mercilessly mark them out. Therefore, the lightning-fast Kong Kong'er couldn't defeat the slow-moving Zhao Bailian.
But I soon discovered a fatal weakness: the idiot's health was clearly compromised after eating the biscuits! I only swung the small cauldron a few times and walked a few steps, and I was already panting heavily. That little thing, which weighed only five or six pounds, felt ten times heavier in my hands. When Zhao Bailian fought with someone, he used a fly swatter once and a sword sheath once; it turned out he couldn't handle anything heavier.
This surprised me, but I was immediately annoyed. There was nothing I could do; once you eat a cookie, you have to bear all the consequences. You can't expect to have Xiang Yu's strength and Zhao Bailian's precognitive abilities at the same time. If that were the case, I think you wouldn't be far from being invincible.
Before, when I ate Wu Song's biscuits, I could kick a four- or five-centimeter-thick tabletop and shatter it with one kick, but my foot would ache for half a day afterward—it was like making a cheap car run at 200 miles per hour. But this time, even though I'm a strong young man, I can only move like an old lady with bound feet. It feels even more frustrating, just like driving a sports car with a speed limit of 3 miles per hour!
I fought them for a while, managing to defend myself, but I couldn't swing that small cauldron anymore. Just then, the murderous aura emanating from Fatty suddenly vanished, and the red shadows that clung to me like maggots disappeared as well. He stood there stunned for a moment, but with Fatty's intelligence, he immediately assessed the situation. Having regained his memory, he saw that I seemed to be struggling, gave me an apologetic look, and then drew his sword to slash at Qin Wuyang's head—even at this critical moment, he was still thinking of not making things difficult for Jing Ke.
The reason Qin Wuyang and Jing Ke temporarily abandoned Ying Pangzi to attack me was likely because they both had the same idea: they saw me as Pangzi's bodyguard. Now, I was the only one in the hall capable of fighting back, so they united against me, thinking that to take down Pangzi, they must first take down Xiaoqiang (Jing Ke). Although they usually didn't get along, they were now comrades-in-arms. Even though Ersha didn't understand why Pangzi had sided with them earlier, when he suddenly saw Pangzi raise his sword to strike Qin Wuyang, he didn't hesitate to use his dagger to parry. Qin Wuyang nodded slightly in thanks, then twisted and lunged at Qin Shi Huang…
By this time, I had already tossed the small cauldron aside, and my body was so limp that I couldn't control it. Just as the fat man was about to be caught by Qin Wuyang, Jing Ke suddenly stopped his murderous intent and stabbed Qin Wuyang hard in the chest with his dagger. Caught off guard, Qin Wuyang hurriedly dodged the blade (which was actually no longer sharp). Ignoring the urgency of the situation, he glared at Jing Ke and shouted, "What are you doing?"
Jing Ke ignored him and kept winking at Qin Shi Huang, indicating that he had just realized what was happening. Unexpectedly, the fat man swung his sword without a word... The fat man was confused again.
I saw everything clearly from the side, and I didn't know whether to be angry or amused. Taking advantage of the chaos, I found a handy weapon for myself—the leather boot on my left foot!
This cleverly incorporates the experience of Liu Bang's mistress, Fengfeng. I remember she once used a high heel to fight Xiao Liu and his gang, and even knocked one of Xiao Liu's brothers' heads so hard it looked like a Buddha from the Western Paradise.
The craftsmanship of the Qin Dynasty was still lacking. As the King of Qi, I naturally wore the best things available at the time, but those leather boots still couldn't distinguish between the sole and the heel. When taken off, they looked more like women's stockings. But it was precisely because of this that they were able to better fulfill their function as a weapon—this thing hurt when swung around and whipped someone, and the weight was just right; it was truly a treasure.
The situation on the field changed again. Fatty was fighting alongside Ersha, a rare occurrence. Qin Wuyang had almost succeeded in taking someone hostage several times, but Ersha had thwarted his plans. However, Jing Ke was considerate; he had saved Qin Wuyang from the Qin King's sword more than once. Now, with two swords, one long and one short, thrusting at him simultaneously, Qin Wuyang was both surprised and suspicious, hesitant to kill either of them, and retreated repeatedly. I jumped behind him and patted his shoulder. Qin Wuyang turned around, and with a "smack," a leather shoe struck him squarely in the face, leaving a clear footprint.
Enraged, Qin Wuyang recklessly swung his fist at my face—I'd seen him make that move the moment I jumped behind him. Calmly tilting his head, Qin Shihuang seized the opportunity and thrust his sword forward, about to deliver a fatal blow to Qin Wuyang. Jing Ke shouted, deflecting the sword with his dagger once more, while simultaneously launching a deadly attack on the fat man…
It was the most unique, bizarre, chaotic, and indistinguishable battle in history.
In this battle, four complex individuals emerged: two eccentric ones, one frantic one, and one who remained in a state of inexplicable confusion for an extended period.
In this battle, sometimes I teamed up with Fatty to fight Ersha and Qin Wuyang; sometimes I teamed up with Ersha to fight Qin Wuyang and Fatty; and of course, sometimes I inevitably teamed up with Qin Wuyang to fight Fatty and Ersha...
I brandished my leather boots in the chaos, sometimes fighting two, sometimes three, but without exception, the soles of my boots landed squarely on Qin Wuyang's face. Qin Wuyang, unarmed and confused, was extremely frustrated and couldn't help but ask me, "Why are you only hitting me?" I was stunned, unsure how to answer this unlucky fellow, so I simply remained silent and continued slapping him... In no time, Qin Wuyang's face was covered in my footprints, resembling the bricks in a train station hall.
Finally, a guard heard the commotion inside the hall and cautiously peeked out. What he saw terrified him; he ran inside shouting for help. A moment later, General Wang led a large contingent of guards in.
Qin Wuyang panicked upon seeing this and shouted, "Jing Ke, fight..." I stepped forward, swinging my leather shoe at him while scolding him, "Fight, fight, I'll let you fight!"
Qin Wuyang instinctively covered his face with his hands. Then he let out a strange scream and lunged at me like a madman. His movements were indeed much faster than before, but it was useless. To me, even faster movements were just a few more marked shadows. I took a step back and slapped Qin Wuyang across the face. Then I took another step forward, and just as he was about to throw a punch back, slap him again. Then I ducked my head to avoid his punch and slapped him again... Qin Wuyang couldn't take it anymore. He cried out and collapsed to the ground with a thud, his legs kicking as he did so. I didn't know if he was knocked unconscious by me or if he fainted from anger.
When Qin Wuyang collapsed, both Ersha and Fatty were startled, and I simultaneously sensed their murderous aura dissipate rapidly. I whispered, "Proceed as planned!"
Fatty looked at me and then at Ersha, then suddenly shouted and ran behind the pillar. Ersha reacted quickly this time, chasing after him with a dagger, shouting and yelling. However, I could tell at a glance that this time it was just idiot putting on a show.
In the blink of an eye, Fatty ran out from the other end of the pillar again, but Ersha didn't chase after him. When Fatty ran behind the pillar again, Ersha's voice shouted, "Hey!"
The courtiers were shocked and rushed forward, but I reached out to stop them, saying, "Everyone, step back and let me go!"
Seeing how easily I had fought off the assassin, people quickly stepped back, some even shouting flattery, "King Qi is valiant!"
I cautiously circled around to the back of the pillar and nearly exploded with rage. There stood Ersha, grinning, holding a dagger, face-to-face with Qin Shi Huang. Fatty, sword in hand, was pointing and poking at Ersha's leg, searching for a blood sac. Seeing Fatty's clumsy attempts, Ersha simply used the dagger to puncture the sac himself, and red dye seeped out. I whispered a reminder, "Kezi, call out twice!"
Ersha raised his head and shouted in a pretentious tone, "Ouch—you poked me!" "Ouch, I'm bleeding!"...
As Ersha shouted, he bent down and dug out the blood sac from his chest, about to poke it, when I grabbed his hand and said, "We'll use this later, now it's Ying Ge's turn to chase you!" With that, I shoved him away. Ersha limped off, and the ministers cried out in alarm. I then pushed Fatty out as well, and the ministers exclaimed with delight, "Your Majesty is alright!" "Your Majesty is valiant!"
At this moment, the palace guards, led by General Wang, had arrived. Someone bound Qin Wuyang and took him away. General Wang gripped his longsword tightly, about to intercept Ersha. I peeked out from behind a pillar, signaling him to stop, and whispered, "Let's leave this opportunity for the King to shine!"
General Wang glanced at the situation on the field and saw Qin Shi Huang, holding a long sword, chasing after the limping assassin with great might. He quickly nodded in understanding, stopped several guards, and shouted, "Your Majesty is brave and mighty. Let's watch him capture this thief alive."
Ersha ran behind the pillar and immediately returned to normal. After catching his breath, he punctured the blood sac on his chest. Fatty arrived shortly after, and without my permission, Ersha exaggeratedly cried out, "Ah, you poked me again! My blood..." This time, he limped away, clutching his chest, and staggered out. The ministers roared, "The King has succeeded again!" Many people cheered.
After running three laps, Ersha was practically bleeding profusely. I checked the time; the biscuits were almost worn out, and without sensing their presence, it was practically the same as being blind. When Ersha ran back in, I grabbed him and said, "Alright, Kezi, that's enough."
The fat man came running in, sweating profusely: "I'm exhausted and starving!"
Unexpectedly, Ersha had a strong desire to perform. He blinked his eyes and said, "Let's run two more laps."
The fat man kept waving his hands and whispered, "Don't run away, don't run away, I'm too hungry to run."
I said to Ersha, "Lie down." Then I took his dagger and threw it outside. When the courtiers saw that the assassin's weapon had been knocked away by their king, they cheered.
General Wang led his men around and glanced at the "on the verge of death" Ersha, who knelt before Qin Shi Huang, saying, "Your Majesty, you have been frightened!" The fat man waved his hand.
Just then, I suddenly felt that menacing killing intent emanating from the idiot on the ground again. At the same time, a row of red shadows rose up from him, and the first shadow crawled up from the ground and tightly gripped Qin Shi Huang's neck with both hands...
Ersha has acted up again! Having lost his memory, his next move is to stand up and continue assassinating Qin Shi Huang.
If he gets up now, not to mention the safety of Fatty Ying, everything will be exposed, and General Wang and the others will definitely not hesitate to cut Ersha to pieces...
In desperation, I picked up the small cauldron from the ground. As soon as Ersha looked up, I smacked him on the back of the head. The poor idiot passed out without a sound.
I broke out in a cold sweat, and felt that Zhao Bailian's biscuits had completely lost their effect at that moment—thankfully, otherwise I wouldn't have been able to lift that cauldron either.
General Wang stared blankly at Ersha for a moment, then asked in surprise, "This..."
I wiped my sweat, patted his shoulder, and said, "The assassin is dead."
General Wang reached out and checked Ersha's breathing, saying, "...It seems he's not dead yet."