Chapter 56

When the pot was served, Qin Shi Huang and Jing Ke were indeed very curious. Liu Bang said, "Isn't this 'dou'?" Jing Ke picked up a piece of bright red meat, looked at this and that, and seeing that no one offered any opinions, he stuffed it into his mouth. I was stunned and didn't have time to teach him. Baozi didn't expect that he had never eaten hot pot before, not to mention Qin Shi Huang and the others, who were all confused.

Jing Ke chewed a few times, nodded slightly, and remained silent when others asked him how it tasted. Qin Shi Huang was the first to do so, followed by Xiang Yu and Liu Bang; they all picked up pieces of raw meat and chewed them vigorously, making loud smacking noises. Even Li Shishi couldn't resist picking up a small piece and taking a bite.

They all frowned deeply, strained their necks to swallow the meat, and hissed, "Raw..." Then they all looked at Jing Ke with admiration. Jing Ke sat there expressionless. Seeing the pain on everyone's faces, he asked Liu Bang beside him, "You said it was raw?" Liu Bang nodded vigorously. Jing Ke lowered his head, spat the raw meat on the ground, and said, "I won't eat it raw."

Everyone was stunned, exchanging bewildered glances. Baozi couldn't help but burst out laughing, and I joined in. Li Shishi wiped her mouth with a napkin and scolded, "Brother Jing is too wicked!" Xiang Yu and Liu Bang finally found common ground at this moment, exchanging a look before bursting into laughter. These two, who both considered themselves heroes, had actually been tricked by this fool together. Fatty Ying punched Jing Ke, cursing, "You idiot!"

Baozi laughed and said, "Now I finally know why you guys are so weird—you're all too noisy!" Just then, the pot boiled, and I poured in a plate of meat, stirred it a bit, and called to them, "Now you can eat."

While eating, Baozi casually pulled out the beads from around his neck to show Qin Shi Huang. The fat man glanced at them and said, "I used to have quite a few on my hat." Liu Bang leaned over to look and said ingratiatingly, "Baozi, you like these? You should have said so earlier! I had some on my hat too, but I didn't wear them."

Qin Shi Huang picked up a large slice of sweet potato and said with some regret, "Qiangzi, you won't be able to get to the bowl..." Baozi opened his chopsticks and said, "It's not cooked yet."

Qin Shihuang continued, "How about I bestow upon you the title of King of Qi, as an engagement gift for you and Baozi?" Li Shishi laughed and said, "You can be bestowed that title now."

Qin Shi Huang waved his hand and said, "Can it work? You don't think it's too small, Qiangzi—but you can't go to that place anyway."

Although it was a joke, it showed that Qin Shi Huang truly treated me like family. After unifying China, the Qin Dynasty abolished the system of enfeoffing kings, fearing that powerful kings would usurp the throne. Moreover, Qi was the territory farthest from Xianyang, meaning it was the most likely place to rebel. Qin Shi Huang gave me this territory without hesitation, which was the greatest trust he could place in me.

Liu Bang's eyes darted around as he said, "What's so special about granting a piece of land? Without the king's decree, you wouldn't even dare to enter the capital. Qiangzi, I'll grant you the title of King of the Second Rank, completely equal to me. Wherever you go, within a hundred li (3000 li), it will all be your territory, with the power to collect taxes, grant pardons, and adjudicate cases..."

I said, "Stop talking nonsense. He's just an invincible county magistrate. Stop making empty promises and fantasizing about being an emperor!"

Liu Bang, shrinking his neck, said, "Then this meal is on me..."

"This meal was supposed to be your treat, so as punishment, you have to treat us to a bar later."

Liu Bang, looking distressed, opened his leather bag and asked, "Is 1,000 coins enough?" It seems this kid really won a lot of mahjong in the wild a few days ago.

Xiang Yu downed his cup of wine and said dejectedly, "Xiao Qiang, your brother Yu has neither money nor land, so I really have nothing to give you." Xiang Yu hadn't been happy since he arrived. Thinking about it, it made sense; he'd lost the empire, and women would be utterly miserable. The King of Chu drank cup after cup, and the whole table fell into a somber mood.

Baozi grinned at us and said, "You guys are really into your roles. Hurry up and eat, then we'll go sing karaoke. We can't let Liu Ji get away with this—cheers!"

This time, Baozi's ignorance saved the day. Xiang Yu swept away the gloom, raised his cup high, and shouted, "Drink!"

Li Shishi joked with me, "Your Highness, where shall we go for fun later?"

Before I could speak, Jing Ke suddenly said, "Reverse time..."

Baozi shouted, "Great! I've heard about this bar before, let's go there in a bit!" Everyone naturally agreed and nodded repeatedly.

I glared at Jing Ke, and felt a chill run down my spine.

※※※

Note: There are differing opinions on when hot pot originated. "Dou" and "Gudongxun" are both classical names for hot pot.

Chapter Sixty-One: A Pot of Draft Beer

As I stepped out of the restaurant, I glanced around and decided to have Baozi take three people in a taxi. I rode my motorcycle and called out, "Just two people, please." Jing Ke sat behind me, and Xiang Yu plopped down in the back, almost tipping the motorcycle over. I quickly said, "Brother Yu, you should take the taxi."

As a result, neither Xiang Yu nor Liu Bang were happy. Xiang Yu wanted to ride around in the motorcycle, while Liu Bang thought Xiang Yu was too big and it would be too cramped in the vehicle. I had no choice but to say, "Then Ke Zi, go and bring Ying Ge over."

It wasn't until Fatty Ying got on that I could barely maintain my balance. Now I understand what "heavyweight" really means. These two were like dragons and tigers on my 1955 motorcycle. I had to dodge traffic police the whole way, so I arrived a little later than Baozi and the others.

Baozi said, "There are no private rooms available." I was about to suggest we go somewhere else when Baozi added, "We can sit in the main hall; there's a street dance performance today."

"When did you start liking street dance?" I asked, puzzled.

"I love watching people prop their heads up on the ground and spin around, or prop themselves up on the ground and reach for their crotch..."

"Don't embarrass yourself, that's called the Thomas Flair."

When we went inside, we found that most of the people there were young people wearing loose clothes and some carrying helmets; they were clearly street dance fans. We chose a table with a good view and sat down. Since it was still early, only the colorful lights on the stage were flashing, and the band's seats were empty.

Aside from Jing Ke, Li Shishi and the others were all visiting such a place for the first time, and they kept looking around curiously. A waiter came over to greet us, and when he saw me, he was taken aback, but without saying anything else, he politely asked, "Sir, what would you like to drink?"

Of the seven of us, almost all of us can drink, especially Xiang Yu and Jing Ke. A county-level city only needs about ten of these people to support a winery. Although I'm practically the owner here, it's not time for me to be so shameless as to pay the bill. Besides, precisely because I'm the owner, I'm even less inclined to serve good wine. Liu Bang's 1000 coins would only amount to a pittance in a place like this. I asked the waiter, "What do people drink these days?"

"I recommend a few ways to drink it: whiskey with green tea, jackfruit with cola..."

I interrupted him: "I don't drink foreign liquor."

"...Carlsberg? Budweiser? Heineken? Corona?"

I closed my eyes, shook my head, and refused to speak. The waiter, knowing I was "very familiar" with their boss, patiently continued, "Or would you like to try the Tsingtao?"

I suddenly opened my eyes, my gaze intense, and asked, "Do you have draft beer here?"

"some."

"How much?"

"25 per pot."

"How big is the kettle? Is it this big?" I said, picking up the large aluminum kettle we bought that afternoon and waving it in front of the waiter.

The young man stammered, "Much smaller than this..."

Just then, a pair of hands landed on my shoulders, and someone yelled, "You little rascal, causing trouble here?" I turned around and saw Zhu Gui standing behind me with a grin. I feigned surprise and said, "Hey, Old Zhu! What are you doing here? Where have you been making your fortune lately?"

Zhu Gui, being the kind of person he was, readily agreed when I said that, saying, "Long time no see. I'm just working here for someone." As he spoke, he gave my shoulder a hard squeeze and instructed the waiter, "Get him this and make him a pot."

I took the contents out of the pot and handed it to the waiter, grimacing as I instructed him, "Rinse it before pouring." The waiter walked away, not knowing whether to laugh or cry.

Zhu Gui glanced at our group, instinctively raising his hand to clasp his hands in a fist salute, then realizing it was inappropriate, he waved to Qin Shihuang and the others, saying, "Have fun, everyone. It's all on me today—bring me a few royal salutes later." Zhu Gui was quite the scoundrel; he saw I was trying to save money and was deliberately teasing me. I pushed him a few steps away, saying, "You're busy too, go ahead. We'll just have some tea."

After Zhu Gui left, Baozi said, "Your friend is really a good guy, why don't you introduce him?"

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