I thought to myself, let's just get the old man drunk!
Song Qing smiled and said, "Don't rush, I'll explain it to him slowly."
Just then, Li Bai suddenly noticed the printed school flag on the table. He clapped his hands and burst into laughter, saying, "Who wrote those words? Ugh, they're so ugly!"
Chapter Four: Softness Overcomes Hardness
I've always kept my distance from poets. People have an innate fear and aversion to things they can never understand. Moreover, poets are inherently dangerous; you never know when they'll go crazy and chop off other people's and their own heads with an axe, all while claiming: "I love you so much."
As the relatively unknown online writer Zhang Xiaohua aptly put it: "Giving a poet a brick is the bare minimum of social morality."
Fortunately, Li Bai had a rather unconventional personality. His white hair cascaded down his shoulders, and he wore a white T-shirt with blue prints, making him look more like a traditional Chinese painter. I prefer painters to poets. Now he sat with Song Qing, listening to Song Qing's introduction to him. Song Qing told him that there was something called a microphone; as long as you put it on your mouth, your words could travel for miles. Li Bai stroked his chin and pondered, "If only there had been such a thing in the Golden Palace back then..." His divergent thinking was quite in line with the current trend of wishful thinking. In reality, if he had had such a thing to present to Li Longji back then, it would have been far more beneficial to his career than writing thousands of poems.
Everyone knows that feudal emperors had civil and military officials, who stood in two rows, one on the east and one on the west. This was a challenge in terms of space efficiency. Those at the back of the line were practically miles away from the emperor, and since the emperor spoke slowly and deliberately, many people couldn't hear him clearly. You couldn't just say "What are you doing?" or "What are you doing?" to the emperor, nor could you bark at the person in front of you and ask, "Your Majesty, what are you rambling on about?" For example, if the emperor said "Develop the West," the last person might hear "Don't wear underwear." Over time, such people were either exiled or beheaded, leading many ministers with hearing difficulties to lament, "Serving a ruler is like serving a tiger"—but where did this come from? Why didn't anyone stop me from pointing this out?
After understanding the function of the microphone, Li Bai asked Song Qing a question that left him speechless: "Why is that?"
These kinds of people are the worst. They take advantage of you, demanding endless explanations for everything you tell them, as if they're some kind of little girl. And they have another problem: they'll do the exact opposite of what you tell them to do, except for touching a branding iron. Poor Song Qing, how would he know why? I don't even know, how could he possibly know?
It's really amazing, isn't it? How can amplify the sound so much by putting two batteries in a tube?
Upon hearing this, Jing Ersha leaned closer and said mysteriously, "Because there are little people inside..."
Li Bai immediately understood: "They were the ones who shouted it together..."
I simply ignored them and continued watching the competition. After the commotion caused by the martial arts family, the audience, having seen it all before, were no longer interested in the other performances, and the other troupes were truly unremarkable. We were losing interest, but the good news was that Lin Chong said that at this rate, their first half performance alone, based on the 300-meter dash, would secure them first place.
The audience, having lost their amusement, naturally focused their attention on our school flag. They were divided into three main groups. The first group believed it depicted a sunflower and two set squares. Although they didn't understand why there were set squares, they were very certain about the sunflower interpretation. This group was largely composed of administrative staff and lacked imagination. The second group thought it was Crayon Shin-chan, and from this, they deduced that our school was actually a preschool-like extracurricular activity group. Those holding this view were generally naive and came from various professions. The third group, the mainstream group, believed that since our school flag was hung so high and yet it was vandalized like that, the organizing committee should be held responsible…
While everyone was bored, the host walked onto the stage and announced: "The next program is performed by the Crescent Moon Women's Bodyguard School."
The leader of the team closest to the stage complained, "Why aren't they lining up?"
Just then, a long line of beautiful young women ran out from the VIP seats opposite, all dressed in short skirts and short-sleeved shirts, a fragrant breeze wafting by, and they arrived at the stage in no time. The one leading them wasn't the squinty-eyed girl, but she was still pretty. She smiled sweetly at the person who had complained and said softly, "I'm sorry, we were already preparing when we were notified, but changing clothes took up too much time… Why don't you go up first?"
The man was almost dazzled by the girls' fair arms and legs. He scratched his head and chuckled sheepishly, "How could we let you all stand outside in the sun? We'll be fine later." He then turned to his companions and asked, "Don't you think so?" His companions, however, had already narrowed their eyes and wore enigmatic smiles as they focused on choosing their preferred type. When the leader asked them a question, they quickly nodded in agreement.
The girl smiled gently at them before leading the group slowly onto the stage. Although they were dressed rather lively and pretty today, not a single person in the audience made a fuss. Everyone knew these girls were no ordinary girls; after being reprimanded by the female leader yesterday, they were all behaving themselves today. More importantly, people wanted to see what other skills they had up their sleeves.
I was both curious and puzzled. Dressed like that, wouldn't they be unable to even do a somersault? And if they squinted, who would break bricks?
After a dozen or so girls lined up, the music started, and they began to slowly practice their boxing. I watched for a long time; it was still slow and unremarkable, nothing special. I tugged at Lin Chong's sleeve and asked, "Is there a hidden killing move in this boxing style?"
Lin Chong shook his head and said, "I don't understand what they're trying to do either. It's just a simple set of Taizu Changquan (a style of Chinese martial arts)."
Wu Yong suddenly interjected: "Taizu Changquan is a Shaolin boxing style."
I looked at the old monk and saw that he was all smiles, so much so that he didn't even bother to shake the sand out of his eyebrows.
The girls swung their fists for a while, then took swords from their assistants below the stage and drew circles. Seeing the circles, I instinctively looked at the old Taoist priest. He was patting his hat in his hand, chuckling happily, his expression ethereal, truly ethereal.
I blurted out, "Tai Chi sword!" This time, it was Lin Chong's turn to be curious: "What is a Tai Chi sword?"
I casually remarked, "It's a sword technique where the absence of specific moves is the best form. Whoever forgets it the fastest after seeing it is the most skilled."
"Then wouldn't someone who hasn't trained at all be the most powerful?"
I glared at him and said dismissively, "So you're the marksman and I'm the mindset type, we're not on the same level."
At this point, the girls finally started fighting in pairs, but they only went so far as to stop short of a fight, probably because they were flattering one of the judges.
Wu Yong smiled slightly and said, "What a brilliant move, Tian Ji's horse racing strategy!"
I also had a vague feeling that there was a conspiracy involved, so I quickly asked, "What do you mean?"
Wu Yong habitually picked up a newspaper and fanned himself with it, saying, "I couldn't understand why they put on an extra performance yesterday, all that effort for nothing. Only today do I begin to understand why. Yesterday's performance was meant to make people take them seriously and not treat them like mere ornaments, but today's performance is the real show."
I said, "Wouldn't it be better if they just carried over yesterday's approach to today?"
Wu Yong shook his head and said, "Kicking bottles and breaking bricks are too ordinary. It's difficult to make a name for yourself in a situation like today. According to Instructor Lin, it's probably not even comparable to the staff techniques of Yue Fei's army."
Lin Chong said, "It's nowhere near as good as it."
"So—" Wu Yong continued, "this is called using one's inferior horses against another's superior horses. In both appearances, they ultimately stole the show. Did you notice their attire?"
I was completely bewildered: "Huh? What?"
"The reason they dressed like this is to remind everyone that they are, after all, women, and that everyone should be lenient with them, which is very endearing in itself. As for their performance, it is remarkable that a group of girls can be so knowledgeable and even more outstanding. I think they are determined to win this performance competition."
I muttered to myself, "I know you're a cunning strategist, but do you have to think so badly of people?"
Wu Yong, of course, did not hear this. He shook his head and said to himself, "Being able to overcome strength with softness and knowing how to win with a low profile, the opponent is indeed a formidable enemy, a truly formidable enemy."
Zhao Bailian suddenly shrugged and said, "There's a murderous aura!"
I gripped my binoculars and followed his gaze, only to see a beautiful woman across from me also looking in our direction with great interest. Needless to say, I could almost see through her binoculars that her eyes were narrowed to slits…
The girls finished their performance with such nonchalance. Looking back at the stage, the judges all wore kind smiles, as if even the pain from being swept by the sandstorm had been soothed.
...
That day, the exhibition competition concluded, and after unanimous evaluation by the judges, the first place went to Crescent Moon Women's Bodyguard School, and the second place to Yucai Martial Arts School...
Afterwards, I summarized the lessons learned and came to this conclusion: if we had followed Xu Delong's suggestion not to use sticks from the beginning, we wouldn't have lost; and if we had removed the hook-and-sickle spear section from the broom performance, we still wouldn't have lost.
Most importantly, if that little east wind hadn't blown in at the time, we certainly wouldn't have lost. This shows that the saying "favorable timing is not as important as favorable location" isn't always entirely accurate.