She leaned over the table and lifted a corner of the newspaper her mother had spread out to pick rice. Mrs. Gu said, "These are all old newspapers." Manzhen smiled and said, "Look, isn't this today's?" She pulled out the bottom newspaper, and Mrs. Gu smiled and said, "Alright, alright, I'll let you have it. I also need to go and rest. This rice isn't good; there's a lot of sand in it. Picking it has made me dizzy." She tidied up and went out.
Manzhen found the movie advertisement in the newspaper and said to Mujin, "It's the last day. I urge you to go see it no matter what." Mujin smiled and said, "You go too." Manzhen said, "I've already seen it." She said, "You're trying to trick me! No, I'm really tired today and don't want to go out anymore. I'm not even planning to go see my brother's performance today." Mujin smiled and said, "Then he must be very disappointed."
Mu Jin held the book she had lent him. He read a section of it every night before bed, and the book was so worn and folded that the cover had fallen off. He laughed, "Look at how I've read your book!" Manzhen laughed, "What's the big deal about such a tattered book? Brother Jin, are you leaving the day after tomorrow?" Mu Jin said, "Yes. I've already stayed an extra week." He didn't say: It's all for you. After being rejected, he was still living in her house, seeing her every day—that must have been very painful. But now he thought, it's rare to have such an opportunity, with no one around.
He hesitated for a moment, then said, "I really want to invite my great-aunt and cousin's wife to the countryside for a visit. When Weimin and the others have their spring break, we can all go together and stay for a few days. We can stay in our hospital, which is cleaner. You probably don't have a break?"
Manzhen shook her head and smiled, "We rarely get a few days off a year." Mu Jin asked, "Could you ask for a few days off?" Manzhen smiled and said, "I'm afraid not, we don't have that rule where I'm from." Mu Jin looked disappointed and said, "I really hope you can go and have some fun. The scenery there is quite nice, and you can also get to know me better."
Manzhen suddenly realized that if he continued, he was heading towards proposing to her. Taken aback, she thought, "I'd better stop him quickly." She couldn't let him say those words, lest they leave a trace. But even as she thought this, her heart pounded. She simply lowered her head and slowly gathered the remaining grains of rice from the table, piling them into a small heap.
Mu Jin said, "You must think I'm too rash, saying these things after only knowing you for a short time. I really have no choice—I can't come to Shanghai often, and we'll have very few opportunities to meet in the future."
Manzhen thought to herself, “It’s all my fault. When he came this time, the moment I saw him, I was reminded of how naughty I was when I was a child. When he was with my sister, I would always cause trouble for them. Now I feel very sorry about it, so I was especially nice to him. I didn’t expect that because of my apology, I would feel even more guilty now.”
Mu Jin smiled and said, "Over the years, I've been busy from morning till night, buried in my work, and I didn't feel like I was getting old. It's only since I saw you this time that I realize I am old. Perhaps I met you too late—too late, isn't it?" Manzhen was silent for a moment before smiling and saying, "It is too late, but not for the reason you think of." Mu Jin paused, then said, "Is it because of Shen Shijun?"
Manzhen simply smiled and didn't answer, which was tantamount to her acknowledgment. She said it intentionally, implying that she had fallen in love with someone else first, and therefore had to apologize to him; she felt this would be less hurtful to his pride. In truth, even if she had met him first and then Shijun, she believed she would still have liked Shijun.
She suddenly understood why Shi Jun's attitude had been so strange all this time, why he rarely came here. It was because of Mu Jin; he had misunderstood. Manzhen felt extremely angry—he didn't trust her at all, thinking she was so easily swayed. Even if she had changed her mind, hadn't Shi Jun promised her before? He said, "I will win you back no matter what." Didn't his words under the moonlight that night count? He was still as passive as ever; the moment a third party appeared, he would quietly slip away without saying a word. This man was so hateful!
Manzhen grew angrier the more she thought about it. In that instant, her heart had already flown to Shijun, and she had almost forgotten Mujin's existence. Mujin was also filled with mixed feelings at this moment. He sat silently opposite her for a long time before finally standing up and saying, "I have to go out for a while."
See you later.
He left, and Manzhen felt a pang of sadness. She sadly took the book she had lent him. The cover was torn. She rolled the book into a cylinder, held it tightly in her hand, and tapped it against her wrist.
It was almost dusk, and it seemed Shijun wouldn't be coming today. That man was truly awful. She stormed out in a huff, wanting to avoid constantly worrying about him at home, only to have him never come.
She went to the next room. Her grandmother was in bed, feeling a bit sore and uncomfortable. Her mother was working there, wearing glasses. Manzhen said, "Jiemin is performing today. Mom, are you going?" Mrs. Gu said, "I'm not going. I'm just like Grandma, feeling sore and uncomfortable." Manzhen said, "Then I'll go. I won't go alone; it would be too disappointing for him." Her grandmother then said, "Where's Brother Jin? Ask him to go with you." Manzhen said, "Brother Jin went out." Her grandmother glanced at her face; her mother remained indifferent and silent. Manzhen somewhat guessed what the two old ladies were thinking. She didn't say anything, tidied herself up, and went to her brother's school to watch the play.
Not long after she left, the phone rang. Mrs. Gu answered it, and it was Mu Jin calling. He said, "I won't be back for dinner, Aunt, don't wait for me. I'm at a friend's house, and I won't be back tonight." His voice, though carrying a smile, sounded forced. Mrs. Gu knew perfectly well that Manzhen must have given him a hard time earlier, and he felt embarrassed, so he stayed elsewhere.
Mrs. Gu was already heartbroken, but the old lady kept asking her all sorts of questions: "Did she go to a friend's house? What happened? Manzhen ran away all by herself."
"Have those two little ones had a little spat? They were just fine a moment ago, I saw them chatting and laughing." Mrs. Gu sighed and said, "Who knows what happened! Manzhen's temper is so disheartening, I'm never getting involved in her affairs again!"
Having made up her mind to ignore Manzhen's affairs, she suddenly felt as if she had nowhere to place her emotions and thought of her eldest daughter, Manlu. The last time Manlu came back to her parents' home, she tearfully told her about her marital discord. She didn't know how Manlu was doing lately, and she hadn't heard from her for quite some time, which made her very worried.
She called Manlu to ask how she was doing. Manlu sensed from her mother's tone that she was coming to visit her. Ever since her sister's visit had caused trouble, she had made up her mind to avoid her family coming to her place, preferring to go herself. So she said, "I was going to come out tomorrow, but I'm coming to see Mom tomorrow."
Mrs. Gu was taken aback for a moment, remembering that Mu Jin was currently staying at their house, and it might not be convenient for Manlu to come. Although Mu Jin was staying out today, she might be back tomorrow, and they could just happen to run into each other. She hesitated for a while, then said, "It's not good for you to come tomorrow. Why don't you come in a few days later?" Manlu was quite surprised and asked, "Why?" Mrs. Gu couldn't say much on the phone, so she only vaguely replied, "Let's talk about it when we meet."
The more hesitant and evasive she became, the more curious Manlu grew. Alone at home, she was already feeling incredibly bored, so that very evening she took a car to her parents' house to see what was going on. That evening, the children were all at school having a fun day, and the mother-in-law and daughter-in-law ate dinner quietly, then sat facing each other under the lamplight picking rice. Manlu's sudden arrival startled Mrs. Gu, who assumed she had quarreled with her son-in-law and run away in a huff. She scrutinized Manlu's face, not seeing any tears, and still somewhat puzzled, asked, "Is there something you need?" Manlu smiled and said, "Nothing much. I've been wanting to come, but they wouldn't let me come tomorrow, so I came today."
Before she could even sit down, Old Mrs. Gu interrupted her, saying, "Mu Jin has come to Shanghai. Did your mother tell you? He's staying with us now. His mother died, and she came all the way here to tell us. This child, after all these years, is even more capable than before. This time in Shanghai, he bought an X-ray machine for their hospital. He became the hospital director at just over thirty. His mother had such a hard life; she didn't get to enjoy her life for many years before she died. I was really sad to hear that. Of all my nieces, she was the closest to me—who would have thought she'd leave me behind!" As she spoke, her eyes welled up with tears again.
Manlu only caught the first two sentences, that Mu Jin had come to Shanghai and was staying with them. Upon hearing these two sentences, her ears immediately went blank, and she couldn't hear anything afterward. After a long pause, as if she didn't quite trust her grandmother, she turned to her mother and asked, "Is Mu Jin staying with us?" Mrs. Gu nodded and said, "He went out today and stayed overnight at a friend's house; he won't be back." Manlu breathed a sigh of relief upon hearing this and said, "You told me on the phone not to come tomorrow because of this?!" Mrs. Gu smiled wryly and said, "Yes, I was thinking that since you're here, it would be better if we met or not. It's awkward." Manlu said, "It's alright."
Mrs. Gu said, "To be honest, it's nothing. It's been so many years, and we're old relatives, so we're not afraid of what people say—" Before she could finish speaking, the doorbell rang. Manlu sat in her chair, leaned forward slightly, glanced at herself in the full-length mirror across the room, smoothed her hair, and deeply regretted that she had been in such a hurry when she left that she hadn't even changed her clothes.
Grandma Gu said, "But Mu Jin is back." Mrs. Gu said, "No way, he said he wouldn't be back tonight." Grandma Gu said, "It can't be Manzhen and the others, it's only a little past eight o'clock, they won't be here that soon." Manlu felt the air upstairs and downstairs was tense, as if a play was about to begin, and she, as the leading lady, was completely unprepared, couldn't remember a single line, and everything in her mind was very blurry and vague.
Mrs. Gu pushed open the window and called out, "Who is it?" A few drops of cold rain splashed on her face as soon as she opened the window. It was raining. The tenant's old woman was also calling from the back door, "Who is it? -- Oh, it's Mr. Shen!" Upon hearing that it was Shijun, Mrs. Gu's anger flared. She turned to Manlu and said, "Let's go sit in the other room. I don't want to see him. It's that Mr. Shen. I'm so angry. If it weren't for him—" She sighed deeply and then recounted the whole story to her daughter. Mu Jin had come to Shanghai this time because he was still unmarried. His grandmother had been saying behind his back that it would be good to marry Manzhen to him, to repay his seven years of unmarried devotion. She saw that he was very interested in Manzhen, and Manzhen was also very good to him, but it was all because of this Mr. Shen—
Shijun hadn't planned to come today, but it had become a habit to visit Manzhen every Saturday. He'd been holding back all day, but he came in the evening anyway. The stairs were dark; usually, Manzhen would turn on the light when he reached this spot, but today no one had, so he guessed she might not be home. He groped his way up, and as he reached the corner, he suddenly felt a warm sensation on his shins. There was a coal stove on the floor, with a pot of food cooking on it—knocking it over would be a disaster. He was startled and became even more cautious. Upstairs, he saw Old Mrs. Gu sitting alone under the lamp, several old newspapers spread out in front of her, picking through rice. Shijun felt uneasy when he saw her. Lately, because Old Mrs. Gu considered him Mu Jin's enemy, she protected her grand-nephew, and her attitude towards Shijun was quite different from before. Shi Jun had never been treated so coldly in his life. He forced a smile and called out, "Grandma." She looked up and smiled, making a muffled sound as a greeting, and continued picking her rice. Shi Jun asked, "Has Manzhen gone out?" Grandma Gu replied, "Yes, she went out." Shi Jun asked, "Where did she go?" Grandma Gu said, "I'm not quite sure. Maybe she went to see a play?" Shi Jun then remembered that he had passed by Mu Jin's room downstairs earlier, and there was no light inside. Mu Jin had also gone out; they had probably gone to see a play together.
A woman's coat was draped over the back of the chair, and a handbag sat on the table; it seemed there were guests here. Was that Manzhen's sister? I hadn't noticed before, but there looked like a car parked by the back door.
Shijun was about to leave, but hearing the rain outside getting heavier, and realizing he hadn't brought a raincoat and might not be able to hail a taxi, he hesitated. Just then, the glass windows, which weren't closed properly, were blown open by the wind. Old Mrs. Gu hurried to close the windows, but the door to the next room was also blown open by the wind. Mrs. Gu's voice could be heard clearly: "Otherwise, wouldn't it have been better if she had married Mu Jin? Think about it! Then she wouldn't have to work so hard. The old lady has always wanted to go back to her hometown, and she's happy now. Our two families are now one, and thankfully we're old relatives, so it's not like we're just climbing the social ladder." Another woman's voice said something, probably telling her to keep her voice down, and then it went silent.
Grandma Gu bolted the window, turned around, and, without changing her expression, acted as if she hadn't heard anything. It was unclear whether she was hard of hearing or just pretending. Shijun nodded to her and mumbled, "I'm leaving." He wouldn't leave even if it was raining heavily, let alone freezing cold.
However anxious he was, climbing the dark stairs required proceeding cautiously, step by step, which was incredibly frustrating. Rushing down the stairs in a huff was absolutely impossible. Shi Jun thought in the darkness, "It's no wonder her mother is materialistic—Mu Jin's career is already quite successful, and he has a considerable social standing, unlike me, who's just starting out and has no idea what the future holds. Man Zhen admires him greatly, but because we're not officially engaged yet, we have a tacit understanding, and she doesn't want to back out. Perhaps she and Mu Jin are kindred spirits? —Fine, I definitely won't make things difficult for her."
He steeled his resolve and made this decision. When he went downstairs, the old woman who lived with the tenant was still washing rags in the kitchen. Seeing him, she said, "It's raining so hard, Mr. Chen, didn't you ask them for an umbrella? There's a broken umbrella here, would you like to use it?"
It was this unrelated old woman who showed such warmth and human kindness; in comparison, Shijun felt even more desolate. He smiled at her, then pushed open the back door and walked into the pouring night rain.
Upstairs, as soon as he left, Old Mrs. Gu went to the next room to report: "He's gone. — It's raining so hard, Manzhen and the others will be soaked to the bone when they get back."
As soon as the old lady came in, Mrs. Gu fell silent. The three generations of the family sat facing each other in silence, with only the sound of rain pattering in the background.
Mrs. Gu had just been telling Manlu everything about Mu Jin and Manzhen, without any reservations. Manlu herself was already married, and married so well, achieving great success, while Mu Jin had remained unmarried because of her—wouldn't it be better to have her sister comfort him? Her mother assumed she would agree. Actually, she was both shocked and angry, most angry at her mother's tone, as if elders were discussing the next generation's marriage. It was as if she were a complete outsider, that this matter had nothing to do with her, and that she had no right to be jealous. Her mother was really meddling; why did she have to try to matchmake her sister and Mu Jin? Her second sister already had a boyfriend; this would only give Mu Jin more trouble. She knew that if Mu Jin truly loved her sister, it was because of her—because her sister resembled her somewhat. He was still chasing after a shadow!
She was deeply moved and wanted to see him to persuade him to stop being so infatuated. She told herself she had no other purpose than to see him and offer him some advice. But who knew? Perhaps she still harbored an unrealistic hope, especially given how badly Hongcai treated her and how painful her situation was.
Not wanting to say anything in front of her grandmother, Manlu stood up and said she had to leave. Her mother saw her downstairs. Reaching Mu Jin's room, Manlu casually switched on the light and smiled, "Let me see." It was her old bedroom, but all the furniture had been replaced. It was now temporarily furnished, with a bed, a table, and two chairs sparsely placed. The room felt empty. Mu Jin's washcloth hung on the back of a chair, his hat was on the table, along with his fountain pen and comb. His shirt, which his mother had washed and neatly folded, was placed on his bed. There was also a book beside his pillow. Manlu stared blankly at everything under the light. After several years, he had become a stranger. This room, where she had lived for several years, also felt so unfamiliar. She felt dazed, as if in a dream.
Mrs. Gu said, "He's leaving the day after tomorrow. The old lady said we should cook a couple of dishes for his farewell. I don't know if he'll be back tomorrow." Manlu said, "His things are all here. Even if he doesn't come back tomorrow, he'll come to get them the day after. Call me when he comes. I want to see him and say a few words." Mrs. Gu paused, then said, "You really want to see him again? What if your son-in-law finds out? That wouldn't be good, would it?" Manlu said, "I'm doing this openly and honestly, what's there to be afraid of?" Mrs. Gu said, "Actually, of course there's nothing wrong, but if your son-in-law finds out, he'll start making trouble for you again! Don't worry, it won't affect you!"
For some reason, every time Manlu talked to her mother, even though both sides meant well, it always ended up making Manlu angry.
The next day, Mu Jin didn't return. On the afternoon of the third day, just before boarding the train, he came back to move his luggage. Manlu arrived early, without waiting for her mother's call, and ate lunch at her parents' house. Mrs. Gu was worried all day, fearing that their meeting would rekindle their old flame. Her daughter and son-in-law's relationship was already strained, and this might lead to a complete break. Her daughter's temper was always like this; she wouldn't listen to advice, and there was no way to stop her. She wanted to follow her around. Not letting her meet Mu Jin alone seemed like surveillance, too obvious.
Mu Jin arrived and was unpacking his luggage in his room when he looked up and saw a slender woman in a purple velvet cheongsam. He didn't know when she had entered, but she was leaning against the bed railing, smiling at him. Mu Jin was startled, and then he suddenly realized that this woman was Manlu—and he was startled again. He was speechless, staring at her, his heart sinking.
He finally smiled and nodded slightly to her. But he really didn't know what to say, he couldn't find a single word, his mind was as blank as if it had been washed clean, the two of them faced each other in silence, only feeling the fleeting years flowing by.
Manlu spoke first. She said, "You're leaving soon?" Mu Jin replied, "My train leaves at two o'clock." Manlu crossed her arms, elbows resting on the bed railing. She lowered her eyelids, stroking her arms, and said softly, "Actually, you shouldn't have come here. You've come all this way to Shanghai; you should have enjoyed yourself. —I really hope you've forgotten about me."
Mu Jin found it difficult to answer her words. She thought he was still infatuated with her. He couldn't defend himself either. He paused for a moment, then said, "Why bring up those old things? Manlu, I heard you've found a good match, and I'm very comforted." Manlu smiled faintly and said, "Oh, you heard what they said. They only see the surface; they have no idea how I feel."
Mu Jin hesitated to speak, fearing that if Manlu continued, she would elaborate on her feelings and lead to a deeper conversation. So another long silence ensued. Mu Jin tried his best to control himself and didn't look at his watch. He noticed her clothes; she was wearing this purple dress today, wondering if it was a coincidence. She used to have a deep purple silk cheongsam, which he loved. Bing Xin had a novel that mentioned a "sister in purple," and for a period, Mu Jin addressed her as "sister in purple" in his letters. She was the same age as him, two months older.
Manlu smiled and looked him over, saying, "You're still the same. But look how different I've become!" Mu Jin smiled and said, "People always change, and I've changed too. My temper is different now than before. I don't know if it's because of my age, but thinking back on the past, it seems so childish and ridiculous."
He denied everything from the past. He was ashamed to acknowledge some of the memories she cherished. Wearing that purple dress, Manlu suddenly felt like she was being pricked by thorns. Her whole body felt like it was on fire. She wanted nothing more than to tear that dress to shreds.